Blum’s Blog

Topics to Discuss (and Avoid) at Your Thanksgiving Table

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday of the year. It’s not just because of the food (though it is my favorite meal of the year). It’s also because we pause and express gratitude for the abundant blessings in our lives. But the experience can be ruined if the table talk turns hot. Polarization in our country has bled its way into families. Arthur Brooks reports that more than half of families have family members not speaking to each other. How can we try to keep the Thanksgiving table temperature from boiling over? I have a few tips.

Talker Research surveyed 2,000 adults to identify topics that should be off limits during holiday dinner. Here are the results:

  • 42% said politics
  • 28% said finances
  • 26% said appearance and weight.

CBS Sunday Morning show reports that 70% will try to avoid talking politics at the table. Of all the hot topics, politics is the hottest and the one to be most avoided. As Arthur Brooks confirms in his newsletter this week “Surviving the Table Drama,” “When ‘winning’ an argument seems supremely important to you, much more so than harmony at your Thanksgiving dinner, you will find yourself emotionally disconnected from your relative, and vice versa, each of you saying things that ruin the dinner and perhaps the relationship.”

How do you keep from veering into those bombastic subjects? I suggest that the host of the dinner speak up warmly and take control by raising questions for everyone to go around the table and answer. This not only helps keep volcanoes from erupting, but it also gives everyone at the table (especially the youngest ones) a chance to talk.

What are some suggested topics? By popular demand, I am repeating below “20 Questions for Your Thanksgiving Table Talk” which I provided a couple of times in the past. Before that reveal, I also suggest another topic for table discussion: Gratitude. Per Brooks, feeling gratitude actually makes us more patient and tolerant when we gather with family. What gives you gratitude? Think back over the last year. Is there a highlight experience that caused you to feel grateful? I’ll go first.

Last week in New York, Laurie and I had an experience that filled us with gratitude on so many levels. We gathered with our family at The Plaza Hotel for the Hope, Healing & Heroism Gala. The event benefitted Israel’s Soroka Medical Center, the primary provider of medical care to thousands of wounded civilians, soldiers, and hostages following the October 7 terror attack. The Gala honored our son-in-law, Dr. Ira Savetsky, with the Healthcare Champion Medal of Honor. Ira is a plastic surgeon who made it his mission to provide free reconstructive surgery to victims of antisemitic violence and survivors of the Hamas massacre. The evening also honored our daughter Lizzy as a “Hero of Truth” for using her social media and public speaking platforms to combat antisemitism and elevate Jewish causes. Being there was a mountaintop moment for us, as if we had reached the top of Mt. Sinai.

Beyond that gratitude, it also gave us joy that our granddaughters were there to witness it. I’m a big proponent of hands-on philanthropy. The best way to instill that value in our next generations is for us to model it. Stella and Juliet not only see their parents roll up their sleeves. They jump right in and join in the work. As Lizzy says, “helping Israel is our family business.”  

On one more level of gratitude, I also felt grateful that our son Adam and his wife Brooke came from Austin to join in the celebration. We lead busy lives and live in different cities. It takes effort, but it’s so important for families to gather and create lifetime memories together. Furthermore, I’m grateful to report that everyone got along and there were no moments of family friction, which I don’t take for granted. That’s my hope for your Thanksgiving experience.  

To help keep the peace at your table, I’ll now repeat the 20 Questions for Your Thanksgiving Table Talk. Researchers at Emory University developed these questions as a “Do You Know?” list to educate children about their family’s history. After years of research and interviews, Bruce Feiler revealed this startling discovery: “The ‘Do You Know?’ scale turned out to be the best single predictor of children’s emotional health and happiness.”

  • Do you know how your parents met?
  • Do you know where your mother grew up?
  • Do you know where your father grew up?
  • Do you know where some of your grandparents grew up?
  • Do you know where some of your grandparents met?
  • Do you know where your parents were married?
  • Do you know what went on when you were being born?
  • Do you know the source of your name?
  • Do you know some things about what happened when your brothers or sisters were being born?
  • Do you know which person in the family you look most like?
  • Do you know which person in the family you act most like?
  • Do you know some of the illnesses and injuries that your parents experienced when they were younger?
  • Do you know some of the lessons that your parents learned from good or bad experiences?
  • Do you know some things that happened to your mom or dad when they were in school?
  • Do you know the national background of your family (such as English, German, Russian, Chinese, and so on)?
  • Do you know some of the jobs that your parents had when they were young?
  • Do you know some awards that your parents received when they were young?
  • Do you know the names of the schools that your mom went to?
  • Do you know the names of the schools that your dad went to?
  • Do you know about a relative whose face “froze” in a grumpy position because he or she did not smile enough?

The Blum Firm wishes you a meaningful Thanksgiving celebration with your loved ones.

 

Marvin E. Blum

In this season of Thanksgiving, the Blum family was grateful to celebrate daughter Lizzy Savetsky as a Hero of Truth and son-in-law Ira Savetsky as recipient of the Healthcare Champion Medal of Honor. Presenting the awards was Tovah Feldshuh, Broadway/film/TV actress.

Marvin Blum’s granddaughters Stella (right) and Juliet follow their parents’ example of service to the Jewish community, broadcasting live from the Hope, Healing & Heroism Gala honoring their parents. As their mother Lizzy Savetsky says, "helping Israel is our family business."
Marvin and Laurie Blum were especially grateful to experience this lifetime memory with son Adam and his wife Brooke (left), and the honorees Lizzy & Ira Savetsky (right).
From their home to yours, Marvin and Laurie Blum wish you a meaningful and peaceful Thanksgiving with your loved ones.

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In One Sentence, How Did I Make My Mark?

As I think about legacy, my mind goes to the question: How will you be remembered? You’ll be gone and unable to give that answer. The answer will come from others who look back on your life. Answers to that question are usually short—a sentence, not a paragraph. People tend to boil it down to the main highlight or two that best sums you up. That brief statement is how history will remember you.

I began pondering this question after listening to a podcast from my best friend, Talmage Boston. His podcast series is called “Cross-Examining History.”  I encourage you to click on this LINK to subscribe. Talmage interviews a lot of famous authors who use the lens of history to teach us valuable life lessons. Episode 88 is an interview with Mark Updegrove about his latest book, Make Your Mark: Lessons in Character from Seven Presidents. The book opens by quoting the long-time Congresswoman and playwright Claire Booth Luce who said great people are usually remembered in history by one sentence. Luce would notoriously go up to people and ask, “So what is your sentence?” Updegrove reports that John F. Kennedy got so tired of her question that he would avoid her at parties.

But Luce got me thinking. What’s my sentence going to be? I’ll warn you; this is hard. It’s easier to write an essay than one single sentence. Luce offered examples: Lincoln freed the slaves; FDR got us through the Depression and won a World War. But if you haven’t abolished slavery, ended the Great Depression, or won World War II, what is your stand-out legacy? 

For more examples, I’ll turn to Updegrove’s one-sentence verdicts for the seven presidents featured in his book, each of whom he personally interviewed:

  • Gerald Ford always intended to do the right thing for the country, which he believed he was doing when he pardoned Nixon.
  • Jimmy Carter was a born-again Christian who wanted to use politics to do good in the world.
  • Ronald Reagan was known for his optimism, encouraging down-hearted Americans to once again believe in themselves and in our country.
  • George HW Bush was a man of humility whose goal was to make America a kinder, gentler nation.
  • Bill Clinton is a man of resilience whom people continued to love even in the face of scandal.
  • George W. Bush is known for his expert handling of the 9-11 attack and keeping America safe for the balance of his presidency.
  • Barack Obama is known for the grace he portrayed in the face of racism and bigotry.

Do those examples help you narrow down your one sentence? I struggled with mine. Rather than flying solo, I debated the topic with my wife Laurie. We did her sentence first. It was instant and obvious to both of us: Laurie Blum is a nurturer, known for nurturing everyone who comes into her life.

For Marvin, the word that came to both Laurie and me was “family.” Caring for my family is at the forefront of everything I do. Laurie expanded my legacy to reflect my life’s work of helping families on a larger scale, not just my immediate family. Marvin Blum’s life’s work, both in and out of his law practice, is to help families build a legacy and thrive. 

I then started to work on Talmage, who uses his thirst for knowledge to stimulate himself and others, always milking the most out of life. When I ran this by Talmage, he recalled how our friend Bill Parrish described him: “Talmage Boston brings people together.” Indeed, in one word, Talmage is a “connector.”

Then Talmage took up the task of a one-sentence recap of how he believes I made my mark: “Marvin Blum brings warmth and wisdom to the world every day of his life.” What a gift it is to hear Talmage use those words to describe me. I hope to be worthy of them.

In reviewing these one-sentence legacy statements, I see a common thread. The focus of each sentence is not on our achievements (or what David Brooks describes as “resume virtues” in his book The Road to Character).  Instead, the mark we made is measured by the impact we had on others. Baseball legend Jackie Robinson summed it up: “A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives.” It all boils down to how we made a difference in the lives of other people. That’s the essence of legacy.

 

I suggest you give this exercise a try. Ask others for input. The process can be very therapeutic and enlightening. What one sentence sums you up? 

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum is inspired by Updegrove’s book to ponder the question: “In one sentence, how did I make my mark?”

In One Sentence, How Did I Make My Mark? Read More »

“You Don’t Have Cancer”

When I started writing this weekly blog five years ago, I never imagined it would evolve into so much personal stuff about Marvin. My plan was to impart estate planning tips to help create a lasting family legacy. My mission is still the same, but the feedback overwhelmingly encourages me to do so by sharing personal stories and experiences. In the parlance of author/educator Brené Brown, I’ve learned to be transparent and “vulnerable.” As Brown puts it: “Vulnerability is not weakness; it is the birthplace of innovation, creativity, and change.” So here I go with another personal revelation that I never would have imagined sharing, but there are some important lessons in it.

As you might guess from the title of this post, this involves a medical situation.  I’ll skip to the finish line of the story, so as not to cause any distress. I’ve been through a health saga, but all ended well and I’m completely fine. But along the way, there was a lot of worry (thank goodness, unnecessary worry, which is so often the case). Several months ago, my voice started getting hoarse. I would start out the day fine, but after a workday of talking, my voice was spent. I visited a local ENT doctor who looked at my vocal cords through a scope. He knew something wasn’t right but couldn’t identify it. He prescribed a couple of medications and told me to return in six weeks. I did, and I was worse. He scheduled me for a CT scan and a biopsy. The CT scan looked fine.

Before the biopsy procedure, Laurie went into action. She decided it was time to call in the experts. Through her relentless efforts, within days I was examined by a vocal cord specialist at UT Southwestern Medical Center in Dallas, which has two floors devoted just to vocal cord issues. (Laurie is a sweet kitten on the outside, but trust me, she’s got a tiger in her. She gets her way, but she does it with sugar, not vinegar.) Within minutes, Dr. Kevin Liang (in my eyes, Saint Kevin) identified a spot on the left vocal cord that he suspected was causing the problem. A few days later, Dr. Liang operated on me and removed the spot. In surgery, he could also see a spot on the right vocal cord that wasn’t visible on the scope, which he also removed. 

Following surgery, Dr. Liang was very candid. It didn’t look good (in his words, it was very “suspicious” looking). I could read between the lines. He sent the tissue to pathology, and we began the waiting game. For five days, I worked at staying optimistic. It wasn’t easy.  I did draw great comfort from my oncologist nephew Dr. Dave Portnoy and his laryngologist brother Dr. Joel Portnoy (Saint Dave and Saint Joel) that even if it was cancer, it was treatable and my voice would return. There were also a lot of prayers going up from me and my loved ones.

Last Monday morning, I got the call from Dr. Liang. Our prayers were answered—“You don’t have cancer!” I was in the late stages of pre-cancer (dysplasia), but we caught it just in time. The hoarse voice was a gift that got me to the doctor.  We’ll continue to monitor the area regularly to catch it early if it ever returns. I am overwhelmed with gratitude.

Here are a few takeaways as I process this ordeal:

  • When it comes to your health, don’t mess around. Get the best medical care possible, and don’t settle for anything less. 
  • Thank G-d, I have a very persistent wife who advocated for me and a wonderful support group praying and encouraging me. Mobilize the troops to go into action on your behalf. Don’t fly solo.
  • While recovering, my speaking voice will be weak for a while. But thanks to honing my writing skills in this weekly blog, I still have my “voice” through the power of the written word.
  • Per advice from psychiatrist friend Dr. Meeta Singh (Saint Meeta), while awaiting news that could be bad, stay on your regular routine and keep busy. And in her golden words: “If you want to talk through any of it or just need someone to listen while you think out loud, I’m right here.”
  • Most of what we worry about never ends up happening. Try not to waste precious moments worrying about what might happen. As the very wise Anne Cortell (mother of dear friend Karen Reisman) used to say, “Don’t borrow trouble.” Wait and deal with it if it happens.
  • In my efforts to stay courageous, I drew strength from my departed dad Julius Blum. He was fearless. Even when he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, his first words were, “I’ve had 76 wonderful years. How can I complain?” He remained upbeat while fighting valiantly for a whole year, making the most of each precious day. What a role model!
  • Arthur Brooks’ blog post last week “How to Think About Your Death” sums it up: “I am alive this day, and I will not waste it.” Admonishing us not to “postpone love and happiness,” he clarifies that he’s talking about “love and relationships. For the sake of some future reward, are you neglecting your family life today? Your friendships? Your spiritual development? Envision yourself having just months to live and giving your current self some life advice.”

This medical episode has certainly turned into a teachable moment for me, and I hope it will do that for you too. Building a legacy is a journey, full of ups and downs. And all those “downs” teach us even more than all those “ups.”

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum undergoes surgery and emerges with wonderful news—no cancer, all is well!

“You Don’t Have Cancer” Read More »

The Red File: A Plan for the End, a Gift for the Living 

A couple of weeks ago I wrote about choosing your burial place, a somewhat morbid yet necessary question to ask yourself. In doing so, you not only choose your final resting place, but you also take a step toward continuing your story and preserving your legacy.

This week, I want to share an important checklist I created that serves as a roadmap for your loved ones after you are gone: “The Red File.” I recently went on The Tamarind Learning Podcast with host Kirby Rosplock and discussed this more in depth. I will link it below so you can listen.

After almost 50 years of drafting elaborate estate plans, I realized something was missing. I would see clients pass away or become incapacitated and watch their loved ones have to navigate so many unknowns. While their legal documents provided important information, there was still so much unsaid.

So, I decided to come up with a roadmap, otherwise known as The Red File, and I sectioned it out into four segments:

  1. Personal Information- This includes details about you and your family members, such as legal documents, insurance information, medical history, and funeral and burial preferences.
  2. Business Continuity Plan- For business owners, this section outlines what should happen with the business the day you are no longer there to run it. Who will take over? What immediate steps need to be taken?
  3. Planning for your Incapacity- What happens if your cognitive ability is lost? This section outlines how you would like your care to look if that happens—from who you’d like to care for you to the foods you enjoy (or hate). These preferences help ensure you receive the care you want and relieve your family from guessing your wishes.
  4. Legacy Plan- This section is about your family history, stories, and culture. Where is your family from? What are your family traditions and rituals? What makes your family unique? I urge you to handwrite a legacy letter, a love letter to future generations that communicates your values, memories, and the wisdom you have gathered along the way. It’s a way to ensure your voice continues long after you’re gone.

Thorough estate plans satisfying all the legal requirements are crucial, but so is having a roadmap for your final wishes. Life is precious, and leaving this world is just as significant as entering it. By putting your wishes in writing, you’ll leave this life with peace of mind knowing your story has been shared, your heritage preserved, and your loved ones are fully informed about your wishes for your final days. You’ll also give your family the gift of grieving without the burden of making difficult decisions and wondering if they got them right.

I encourage you to click this link to access The Red File and use it as your roadmap, so your loved ones will have the guidance they need and your story and legacy can live on for generations to come. 

 

Marvin E. Blum 

Podcast link: The Red File: A Simple, Powerful Gift for Your Family’s Future with Marvin Blum | Tamarind Learning

After nearly 50 years of creating estate plans, Marvin Blum realized something was missing: a guide for all the unsaid details of life and legacy.

Marvin Blum joins The Tamarind Learning Podcast to share the story behind The Red File—a simple yet powerful tool that helps families prepare for life’s “what ifs” and preserve their legacies with clarity and care.

The Red File: A Plan for the End, a Gift for the Living  Read More »

When Writing Your Will, Don’t Forget About Your Pets

Laurie and I don’t have a pet, but most of our friends do. We’re in the minority, as 66% of Americans have a pet. We understand that the pet becomes another member of the family. Per the 2025 APPA National Pet Owners Survey, more than half of the country owns a dog. That includes our son’s family, who has given us a granddog named Basil. 

What happens to your pets after you die? Some have famously included their pets in their estate plans. The most notorious is Leona Helmsley who bequeathed a $12 million trust to her dog Trouble (which a family settlement later reduced to $2 million). Leona is in good company.

  • Fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld left a big inheritance to his cat Choupette, along with two maids, a driver, an iPad, and a Dyson hairdryer.
  • Michael Jackson left $2 million to care for his chimpanzee Bubbles.
  • Miles Blackwell left $10 million to his hen Gigoo.
  • Ben Rea left his cat Blackie $12.5 million.
  • Oprah Winfrey reportedly is leaving $30 million to a trust for her dogs.

Unfortunately, what happens most is the opposite extreme. According to 2nd Chance 4 Pets, “Each year, more than 500,000 pets are surrendered to U.S. shelters because their owners passed away and had not made plans for the continued care of their pets.” You might wonder—how this can happen to a beloved member of your family? The truth is, no one will care for your pet like you do, especially if you haven’t prepared anyone to do so. It’s unwise to leave pets to friends or family members who aren’t prepared to take care of them.

That’s why it’s so important to plan for your pet’s future—not just by telling someone your wishes, but by outlining them in a legal document. That way, you have peace of mind knowing that your final wishes for your pets will be honored.

There are a couple of ways to go about this:

  • Including your pet in a Will.
    Pets are legally considered property, so you can leave them to someone in your Will. This applies to both domestic and exotic animals, as long as the person receiving the pet is in a state where they are legally allowed to own it. Keep in mind that a Will has to go through probate, which can delay care, so you would need to have a plan for this gap period. Also, any money leave to someone for pet care isn’t legally enforceable without a trust. For example, you might leave $4,000 to a family member to care for your pet, but they could choose to use the money differently—or provide less care than you intended—with no legal consequences.
  • Creating a pet trust.
    As I mentioned in a previous blog, “Do You Love Your Pets?” every state now has laws authorizing a Pet Trust. Consider adding a Pet Trust to your estate plan, naming a trustee to be in charge of carrying out your wishes. The trust should be funded with sufficient assets to provide for the annual cost of pet care multiplied by your pet’s life expectancy, plus an extra sum for unexpected needs, transportation, and the final disposition of your pet. This is a great option for pet owners who either don’t have a trusted person to care for their pet when they are gone, or whose pet has specific care needs.

    Pet trusts “provide greater protection than wills and other verbal or written agreements” (The New York Times, “After Your Death, Who Takes Care of the Dog?”, September 28, 2024). “‘While a Will doesn’t go into effect until you pass…. A trust goes into effect the moment it’s signed and continues after your death.’” Therefore, if the owner becomes incapacitated, the trust can be activated. Trusts are legally enforceable and allow for detailed instructions. Trusts can even outline preferences like, “organic pet food, mandate acupuncture or note that a dog likes the radio playing when it’s home alone. They can require pet insurance policies to help cover vet bills.” Others address complex decisions like “Who decides when an older animal should be euthanized? The caretaker? A vet? Two vets? What will become of its remains?” By creating a pet trust, you can ensure the money is used as intended—and your pets receive the care you envision.

So, what’s the best next step? It depends on your situation. If your pet doesn’t require detailed care and you have a trusted friend or family member ready to take them in, then outlining your wishes in a Will may be enough. But if your pet has specific needs, or if you don’t have someone in mind to take them, a pet trust is the better choice, even if it’s not in the league with Leona or Oprah.

We understand that for many, “the pet is the center of their universe.” Therefore, it’s important to understand your options and put your wishes in a legal document. That way, you can have peace of mind knowing that when you pass, your furry friends will be in good hands.

 

Marvin E. Blum

 

Resource: Burchette, Jordan. “The 10 Biggest Inheritances Ever Left to Pets.” Everplans, https://www.everplans.com/articles/the-10-biggest-inheritances-ever-left-to-pets. 

Marvin Blum with granddaughter Lucy and her beloved dog Basil, another member of the Blum family.

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Where Do You Want to Be Buried?

Where do you want to be buried? Sounds morbid, but it’s an important question to address.  As Ecclesiastes teaches, “To everything there is a season…. A time to be born, and a time to die.” Estate planning requires us to face that reality. Selecting a burial plot has many implications. It’s not only a final resting place. It also has significance for those who come after us. A recent Sunday morning at the Ahavath Sholom Cemetery of Fort Worth reminded me of that significance. 

Early fall is the holiest time in the Jewish calendar. During this season of spirituality, we have a memorial ceremony at the cemetery called Kever Avot (Graves of our Fathers). It takes place on the Sunday between Rosh Hashonah and Yom Kippur. Laurie and I arrived early, meandering through the rows of graves, truly a walk down memory lane. It was a peaceful exploration, bringing to mind lots of stories and reflections. We stopped at gravesites of loved ones and allowed the emotions to flow. It was a chance to pause.

We pondered a while at the Blum tombstone, burial place of my grandparents Isadore and Nettie. There’s a lot of family history engraved in those monuments. Isadore’s Hebrew name was Yisroel (Israel), the same Hebrew name as my brother Irwin who was born soon after Isadore died. Irwin was named for him.  You can find out all that just by walking around and reading the markers. My grandson Ollie’s Hebrew name is also Yisroel, named after my brother Irwin. I felt a powerful sense of connection between the past and the present. We are all links in a chain.

Reading the Hebrew on the back of the Blum tombstone, I discovered that Nettie’s father was Zalman (Solomon) and Isadore’s father was Yaakov (Jacob). I’d only heard Yaakov called Yankel. I never knew Yankel was a nickname. I found an old photo of my great-grandfather Yankel, standing at the grave in Russia of his wife. Reading her tombstone, I learned that her name was Gital. My father Julius’ middle name (Geroge, or Getzel) was likely named for her. Now my granddaughter Juliet Georgie (Yehudit Gital), named after my father, carries that name. When Lizzy chose the Hebrew name Gital, we had no idea it was the same name as my great grandmother. By coincidence (or maybe not?) we stumbled upon another line of generational continuity.

The cemetery also tells a story that is a heavy part of our life journey, the grave designated “Infant Daughter of Marvin and Laurie Blum.” Our first pregnancy was a full nine-month perfect one, until the moment in the delivery room when they informed us, “There’s no heartbeat.”  Those words will sting forever. The tombstone reveals the date: February 11, 1982. That date is exactly one year to the day before our son Adam was born, February 11, 1983. That morning, Laurie suddenly went into labor, two weeks before her due date. Adam arrived early, making February 11 a date of both tears and joy. That’s how life works—rejoicing and sorrow all mixed together.

I’ll add one more recent cemetery experience that was meaningful. We lost Laurie’s dear sister Linda a year ago. There is a Jewish tradition of “unveiling” the tombstone a year after death, marking the end of the mourning period. At Linda’s unveiling, Rabbi Micah Greenstein shared some very comforting words: “An unveiling marks the shift from the sadness of grief to the blessing of memory. It’s the keeping of a promise to keep the light and spirit of Linda alive.” I learned that we were moving from grieving Linda to remembering her and keeping her memory alive. 

The decision of where you’ll be buried is significant. Give your family the gift of making that decision now, so they won’t have to face it at a time of grief and stress. I recall a TIGER 21 meeting when a colleague described the horror that week of unexpectedly losing his father-in-law (who had made no advance preparations), and within hours having to juggle grief with a mountain of decisions about the funeral and burial. At that point, I added a section to The Blum Firm’s Red File checklist on “Funeral and Burial” to ease your family’s burden during that difficult time.  Planning for end-of-life is an important part of the estate planning process.

Gravesites serve many purposes. They mark our final resting place. They tell stories. They reveal family history. And importantly, as I learned from Rabbi Greenstein, they help us keep memories of loved ones alive. Laurie and I just selected our final resting places, and it brings us peace. We wish you the same peace.

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum at the tombstone of his grandparents, observing the Jewish memorial tradition of Kever Avot (Graves of the Fathers).

The back of the Blum monument, revealing names of ancestors previously unknown to Marvin.

Marvin Blum’s great grandfather Yaakov (“Yankel”) Blum at the grave in Russia of his wife, revealing that her name was Gital.

The gravesite of the first-born child of Marvin and Laurie Blum who went to heaven on February 11, 1982, exactly one year before the birth of son Adam on February 11, 1983, a heartfelt date now filled with hope and love.

Unveiling of the tombstone of Linda Usdan (Laurie Blum's sister) by Linda's daughter Lisa and husband David, marking the transition from grief to the promise of keeping Linda's memory alive.

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An End to Israel’s Two-Year Nightmare 

We are living in historic times. It’s been two years since the horrific events of October 7, when Hamas terrorists committed the worst atrocities against Jews since the Holocaust. My family was there when Hamas attacked, hiding in a bomb shelter in Jerusalem’s King David Hotel. And here we are today, seeing the first signs of hope in over two years with the release of the 20 living hostages. My family is once again witnessing the events firsthand, back at the King David Hotel. The Hamas attack took place on one of our holiest days, Simchat Torah. Fittingly, sundown today is once again Simchat Torah.  It’s the end of a two-year nightmare. Today we begin a new era.

Today is a day of reverence and celebration. Simchat Torah marks an ending and a new beginning: the ending of the one-year cycle of reading the Torah and starting all over again in Genesis with the creation of the world. Significantly, the first word of the Torah is “Bereshit,” “in the beginning.” It’s a time of prayer, but also a time of rejoicing. Picture the hundreds of peace-loving idealists celebrating the holiday with singing and dancing two years ago at the Nova Music Festival. Their innocence was stolen as Hamas raped, brutalized, killed 1,200, and took 254 hostages into Gaza. At long last, there’s hope. As we celebrate Simchat Torah this year, we are praying for an ending and a beginning: an ending to this inhumane chapter and the beginning of a brighter and more peaceful tomorrow. 

We’ve been here before. When the Holocaust ended, we had hope for a brighter future as we returned to our biblical homeland of Israel. We said, “Never Again.” We’re still saying it, but now with more strength and fervor: “Never Again!” Given the parallels of the Hamas attack and the Holocaust, I am reprinting below my post from two years ago: “What I Learned at Yad Vashem, Israel’s Holocaust Memorial.” Yad Vashem refers to the Hand of G-d, the Almighty who reaches out and protects us. Come back in time with me to relive our day at Yad Vashem, a tour that happened just hours before the October 7 attack. The tour guide assured our granddaughter Stella that times were different now. We would never again experience atrocities as bad as a Holocaust. She was wrong. But I have faith that Yad Vashem, the Hand of G-d, will protect Israel.

My Post of October 17, 2023:

What I Learned at Yad Vashem, Israel’s Holocaust Memorial

As promised last week, I will continue sharing highlights and lessons learned from our week in Israel, a glorious week that came to a horrifying end as Hamas began a terror campaign aimed at eliminating Israel. Realizing that the goal of Hamas is to wipe Israel off the map, I reflect on why Israel must win this war, indeed why the world NEEDS Israel. We spent a day at Yad Vashem, Israel’s Holocaust Memorial. I’ll unpack some of the heart-wrenching revelations I learned there, but I’ll start with the overarching lesson from Yad Vashem: the six million Jews who were murdered had no place to go; other countries didn’t want them, and there was no Israel to take them in. Most say Israel exists now because the Holocaust happened. The reality is that the Holocaust happened because Israel didn’t exist.

The day began with my 10-year-old granddaughter Stella interviewing Rena Quint, a Holocaust survivor. Stella is embarking on a mission to teach the world, and young people in particular, about the Holocaust. She was alarmed to learn of the multitudes that either (1) believe the Holocaust is a hoax that never really happened or (2) have never heard of it and have no idea what it is. Unless we learn from history, we are doomed to repeat it.

Stella discovered that when Rena was Stella’s age, she had spent most of her childhood in a ghetto, a work camp, concentration camps, and a death march. Born in 1935 in Poland, Rena’s early years were spent in a loving home with her mother, father, and two brothers. Her entire family was murdered in the Holocaust; only she survived. She remembers the day her mother let go of her hand and told her to run. That day, the rest of her family went to their deaths. Rena was ultimately imprisoned in Bergen-Belsen concentration camp in April 1945. She managed to stay alive until the camp was liberated by the British. But there she was, a little girl Stella’s age, all alone in the world. Hearing Rena’s story of survival, strength, and faith propels Stella in her quest to educate us on where unchecked evil can lead. Indeed, after Stella ended her stay in Israel in a bomb shelter, her mission has become more critical than ever.

At Yad Vashem, we learned of another little girl Stella’s age. The story was told to us as we looked in a display case at a beautiful long braid of blonde hair that had once belonged to that little girl. As Nazis were coming for the family, the little girl’s mother convinced her daughter that where they were going, her long golden hair would become infected with lice. Her mother cut off the long braid, gave it to their neighbor (along with all their precious possessions) to hold until someday they’d return to retrieve them. The only family member to survive was the little girl’s brother. Years later, he returned to the neighbor to ask for his sister’s hair. They wouldn’t let him in, as they didn’t want to turn over the family’s silver, china, jewelry, and other precious items. The boy stood at the door and begged; he only wanted his sister’s hair. They could keep the rest. They slipped the braid through the door and then shut him out. He left with a priceless memory of his sister that he later donated to Yad Vashem, the Holocaust Memorial.

The tour then became very personal to Stella as she learned the fate of her father Ira’s family from Czechoslovakia. Ira’s ancestors were part of a desperation campaign by Hitler to kill as many Jews, as quickly as possible, when it became evident that they were going to lose the war. Hitler appointed Adolph Eichmann to mastermind the murder of 500,000 Hungarian and Czechoslovakian Jews in only 56 days. A number of Ira’s relatives were sent in cattle cars to Auschwitz, including his grandmother Miriam. Her job at Auschwitz was to sort the clothing of those who were sent into gas chambers. Miriam survived to tell the horror that, in sorting the clothes, she discovered her mother’s monogrammed head scarf. That’s how she learned that her mother (Ira’s great grandmother) had been gassed to death.

Our tour ended with a search through the Book of Names of Holocaust Victims, Yad Vashem’s chronicle of every known victim of the Holocaust. In that book, my son-in-law Ira discovered the name of his great uncle Yaakov Yitzchok Feuerstein, the man for whom Ira (Yitzchok in Hebrew) was named. Ira’s uncle was murdered at Majdanek concentration camp, along with his wife and baby.

Why do we need Israel today? When Ira’s family was part of the 500,000 Jews killed late in the war, the world by then was well-aware of the concentration camp killings. Nothing was done to save them. As Hitler’s Jew-hatred was spreading and Jews wanted out, no country would take them, except in small numbers. Hitler killed 6 million of Europe’s 9 million Jews, and 1.5 million of those killed were children. England reluctantly agreed to take in 10,000 kids, who had to come without their parents (imagine the fears of those kids and agony of their parents having to tell them goodbye, never to see them again). Had there been an Israel, there would have been a place to go. Today, Jews have a place to go. Israel, our ancestral homeland dating back to early Biblical days, will take us in. Today, more than half of the world’s Jews live in Israel.

The most effective way to wipe out a race is to kill all the kids. Hitler tried to do that. It’s taking decades to rebuild the Jewish population. Even today, the number of Jews is still not yet restored to the pre-Holocaust level. For most of their lives, survivors like Rena Quint missed out on the experience of sitting at a Shabbat table with three generations of a family. We are just now getting back to that.

So here we are again with enemies whose stated goal is to push us into the sea. Our tour guide at Yad Vashem told Stella, three days before the attack, that she was living in the best of times, that she would never see something as horrible as a Holocaust. The guide was wrong. Stella’s week in Israel was followed by the greatest loss of Jewish life since the Holocaust. But, this time, we have an Israel that has the might and fight to prevail. Israel must win this war. We owe it to Stella to give her a better future than her ancestors had. I call this weekly email series a “Family Legacy Planning” series. Stella is doing her part to preserve the legacy of her ancestors. Now that’s what I call Family Legacy Planning!

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky with husband Ira and children Stella, Juliet, and Ollie return to Jerusalem’s King David Hotel for this historic hostage release, two years after taking refuge in the hotel’s bomb shelter during the October 7 Hamas terrorist attack.

Two years ago, praying in the bomb shelter, Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky and daughters (left) and husband Ira (far right).
Marvin and Laurie Blum with daughter Lizzy, granddaughter Stella, and son-in-law Ira Savetsky at Yad Vashem, Israel’s Holocaust Memorial.
Stella Savetsky interviewing Rena Quint, a Holocaust survivor.
Ira Savetsky discovering the name of his great uncle, a Holocaust victim for whom Ira was named.
Ira and Lizzy Savetsky entering “The Book of Names of Holocaust Victims” at Yad Vashem. The Savetsky family preserves the legacy of departed ancestors by leading an effort to fight anti-semitism.

An End to Israel’s Two-Year Nightmare  Read More »

My 250th Post: “Write to Make Music”

When I was in high school, my senior English teacher considered me a terrible writer, and I believed her. It’s not that I didn’t try. I labored over my essays more than anyone. They were dripping with sweat and tears. That was the problem. I was trying too hard. I was trying to write the way my teacher Paula Eyrich wrote, full of semi-colons and “generative sentences,” and it wasn’t me.

I remember Eyrich (that’s what we called her) announcing one day to the class: “Blum (that’s what she called me) spends hours writing a paper, and it’s no where near as good as what Jan Orr scribbles down in ten minutes during homeroom.” I should’ve started writing my papers in homeroom.

Eyrich also announced: “Blum will go to the University of Texas and major in business,” long before I’d decided on a college or a major. She was right. I dodged every class at UT that required any kind of literary skills. I became a numbers man. I was at home and confident in the world of debits and credits. (I still am.)

In law school, I learned the world of technical writing—legal memos and briefs. I continued that skill in my career, but I steered clear of any writing that involved creativity. I wrote 100% from the head, zero from the heart.

That was the case all the way up to 2020. Then the COVID pandemic hit and turned our world upside down. Holed up all day in my bedroom with my computer, I got a wild idea one day to start this blog. The Blum Firm was approaching our 40th anniversary, and my way of celebrating it was to start a weekly Family Legacy Planning series. The plan was to impart some estate planning tips for a number of weeks, until I ran out of juice. At that point I would stop.

Then, the unexpected happened. I began to leak more and more of my heart into my weekly posts. It really took root in my post of March 15, 2022, “I Am Ukrainian.” I started sharing more about my own family heritage and my four grandparents’ miraculous escape from Hitler. The reaction floored me. People wanted more “Marvin” in my planning tips. I still focused on how to build a lasting legacy, but the posts were heavily infused with my personal stories.

I went full-force personal in my five-part series on our family’s trip to Israel at the time of the October 7 attack, starting with my post of October 10, 2023. I really took it to the limit of personal when I revealed my daughter’s struggle with alcoholism in my post of August 1, 2023, “Lizzy’s Sobriety Journey.” The feedback was so encouraging it blew my mind.

I had found my voice. I stopped dwelling over word choice and just let the words flow. I abandoned all efforts to write like Eyrich. Gone were the semi-colons and labored attempts at “generative sentences.” What you get now comes straight from the heart—my stories, my attempts at wisdom, my life lessons on how to build a legacy. In typical Marvin fashion, I’ve never missed a week—250 consecutive musings from Marvin.

Historian David McCullough affirms my discovery: “There’s no one way to write. It’s what works for you.” In History Matters (a posthumous collection of McCullough’s essays), he expands: “And yes, happiness is to be found in writing….Write to make music. Don’t just pound out notes.”

What’s the legacy lesson in my post today? Be you. Don’t let someone else define your style. Open up both your head and your heart. Build a legacy that’s true to yourself.

Mama Cass is singing in my ear right now:

 

“Nobody can tell you

There’s only one song worth singing

They may try and sell you

Cause it hangs them up

To see someone like you.

But you gotta make your own kind of music

Sing your own special song.

Make your own kind of music.”

 

Thanks to all of you for singing along with my writing throughout these 250 Family Legacy Planning posts. I’ll try to keep them coming.

 

Marvin E. Blum 

High-school-aged Marvin Blum, then a terrible writer, would be shocked to discover that today marks his 250th post as a writer.

As David McCullough taught, “write to make music.” Blum now “makes his own kind of music” by writing from the heart, and life really is better that way. Marvin is pictured here at a concert with his wife Laurie, wearing his all-time favorite shirt.

My 250th Post: “Write to Make Music” Read More »

“Don’t Let the Old Man In”

“Never Retire” is a motto I fully embrace. This blog has numerous posts lauding the benefits of staying engaged in meaningful daily activity. I’ve often said, “As long as my mind and my body cooperate, I have no plans to retire.” Now at 71, so far so good. My mother Elsie will soon be 95 and is 100% sharp, giving me hope that genetics are on my side. 

I want to add a new twist to this topic. When I say, “never retire,” that doesn’t mean you have to keep doing the same thing forever. In fact, I advocate for periodically doing a refresh. My best friend Talmage Boston calls it “reinventing” yourself. Find a new activity that stimulates you and dive into it. At a recent TIGER 21 event, Board Chair Michael Sonnenfeldt put a similar spin on it: “Our members are not retiring, we’re rewiring—don’t retire…REWIRE.” I’m continuing to practice law, but I now devote large chunks of time to writing and teaching. I’m giving lectures, workshops, podcasts, and writing this blog, articles, and working on a book. I have discovered a passion for sharing the lessons I’ve learned over my five decades as a lawyer. I wake up energized and recharged. Let’s get to work!

To quote Rangers’ baseball manager Bruce Bochy (referring to outfielder Kevin Pillar who changed his mind about retiring): “I saw him last year, he was swinging the bat, moving around well, and still has game left. The last thing you want to do is retire too early if you think you have game left.” Find the activity that works for you, the one where you still have game left in you. It doesn’t have to be a high-powered, scholarly pursuit, just something that stimulates your brain. Even driving an Uber may be the answer. Harvard Medical School professor Dr. Anupam Jena reports that “taxi and ambulance drivers could have a lower risk of developing Alzheimer’s because they are constantly using navigational and spatial processing,… dementia risk was lower among people with cognitively stimulating jobs.” (Sumathi Reddy, “Want to Lower Your Alzheimer’s Risk? Taxi Drivers Offer a Clue,” Wall Street Journal, Dec. 24, 2024.) Reddy concludes, “even if you don’t want to start driving a cab to try to help your brain later in life, it wouldn’t hurt to take up hobbies that stimulate your brain, such as playing chess or learning a new language.” 

We’ve all witnessed the decline that occurs when someone retires and loses their mojo. Some even retire, and then unretire. As Noah Sheidlower reveals, “work gives them purpose and a social life…. Anne Sallee, 68, thought she would enjoy her retirement. But after two years, she decided to go back to work…. ‘I quickly found myself bored.’” (“Meet the Millionaires with No Plans to Retire, Even into Their 80s,” Business Insider, Feb. 16, 2025.) Statistics showing post-retirement health decline and accelerated death are daunting. 

At The Blum Firm, we are providing a solution for senior attorneys exiting the grind of Big Law, but who still have lots of fuel in the tank and want to keep working. It started a number of years ago when Kent McMahan (head of the Trusts & Estates department at Fulbright Jaworski) called to inform me he wanted to join our firm as senior counsel. A few years later, Ed Copley (former managing partner at Akin Gump) did the same. Now we’re doing it again with Stuart Bumpas (former assistant to the IRS commissioner with a distinguished career at Locke Lord), who joins us at The Blum Firm, starting tomorrow! All of these men were brilliant attorneys with no desire to retire. They still had so much left to give, and in doing so, so much left to receive.

Our boutique law setting at The Blum Firm offers the flexibility to achieve a “work-life balance” in the later years of a legal career. It’s a true win-win. Not only do the senior guys get to stay engaged in a law practice they love, our younger attorneys benefit greatly from the mentoring. These elder statesmen are redefining themselves into mentors, bringing to the office the gift of their wisdom and experience. As Arthur Brooks teaches, they are sharing with us their “crystallized intelligence” acquired over a lifetime of learning. 

Forget about your age—it’s just a number. Don’t give into old age. Refuse to let that old man creep into your body. Country legend Toby Keith sang it best in “Don’t Let the Old Man In:”              

“Many moons I have lived

My body’s weathered and worn

Ask yourself how would you be

If you didn’t know the day you were born?”

The calendar may say I’m 71, but my mind tells me I’m much younger. Following Toby Keith’s advice, I’ll pretend I don’t know the day I was born. I have no intention of letting the old man in. As my psychologist friend Dr. Monica Blum says, “That old man can hang out on the other side of the steel dead-bolted door.” Join me in locking out the old man from entering your life!

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum, speaking here in Lubbock, energizes his law career by maintaining an active schedule of speaking and writing.

Marvin Blum welcomes Stuart Bumpas, the latest addition to the important role of Senior Counsel at The Blum Firm.

“Don’t Let the Old Man In” Read More »

Talmage Boston: Epitome of “Tikkun Olam,” “Take It to the Limit,” and “Forever Young”

Relationships: It’s the number one tenet of the Blum family’s mission statement. First and foremost, we value relationships—with family, with friends, with the Almighty. We’re on the same wavelength with renowned author Arthur Brooks. In his weekly newsletter of Sept. 15, 2025 (“Seven Habits that Lead to Happiness Later in Life”), Brooks affirms that “the best way to maximize your chances of happiness in your 70s…is to pour your heart” into this habit:

“Do the work to cultivate stable, long-term relationships now. For most people, this includes a steady marriage, but other relationships with family, friends, and partners can fit in this category as well…. The single most important trait of happy-well elders is healthy relationships.”

I have been abundantly blessed with relationships in my seven decades on this planet—my wife Laurie, friends, colleagues at work. In today’s post, I want to spotlight one particular relationship—my best friend Talmage Boston. Talmage and I have enjoyed the gift of this extraordinary friendship for 50 years.

I’m proud to announce that a few days ago, Talmage was honored as UT Law School’s 2025 Outstanding Alumnus at the school’s annual gala. I had the privilege of introducing him. It was a challenge to sum up Talmage in three minutes. I narrowed it down to a few themes:

  • Talmage is the great connector. He’s the glue that connects the members of the Class of 1978, especially the 22 Canoe Brothers who travel regularly and text daily. By bringing people together, Talmage gives us all the gift of meaningful relationships in our lives.
  • Talmage is a role model for an ethical and fulfilling career, following the example of his heroes Abe Lincoln and Atticus Finch (the eminently ethical lawyer in To Kill a Mockingbird). His exemplary volunteer service to the legal profession has earned Talmage numerous well-deserved accolades.
  • Talmage is a devoted husband, father, grandfather, and leader in his church and multiple civic causes, always giving from his heart that’s as big as Texas. He lives by the Hebrew imperative “Tikkun Olam”— repair and improve the world, which the Canoe Brothers adopted as our motto. Talmage’s generosity even fueled us to create a UT Law Scholarship, the Marvin Blum—Talmage Boston Endowment for Excellence, in honor of our friendship that started when we were roommates during all three years of law school.
  • I concluded by highlighting Talmage’s love of music and singing. One favorite song we share is the Eagles’ “Take It to the Limit.” That song title describes Talmage to a T. In everything he does, he gives his all. In repeatedly “taking it to the limit one more time,” Talmage lives life to the fullest and pulls the best out of all of us.

It’s a challenge to sum up all the life lessons we gain from Talmage in a short speech. I could more easily fill in a book about him. (By the way, Talmage is a prolific writer and author of five books on topics ranging from baseball history to Presidential leadership—including his latest work, How the Best Did It: Leadership Lessons from Our Top Presidents.) I’ve featured Talmage in numerous blog posts, but for some more about him, see my post of June 7, 2022, “It’s All About Relationships: My Best Friend, Talmage Boston.”

I’ll sum up by highlighting Talmage’s influence on a value we share: never retire. Moreover, continue reinventing yourself to stay energized and young. I’ll conclude with words from one of the Canoe Brothers’ theme songs, “Forever Young,” that captures the essence of Talmage:

“May your hands always be busy,

May your feet always be swift

May your heart always be joyful,

And may your song always be sung.

May you stay forever young.”

 

Here’s to my best buddy, Talmage Boston!

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum (right) celebrates his best friend Talmage Boston, UT Law School’s 2025 Outstanding Alumnus, at the school’s annual gala.

Marvin Blum (front row, center) joins members of his Texas Law class to honor Talmage Boston (standing by Marvin).

In introducing Talmage Boston as 2025 Outstanding Alumnus, Marvin Blum extols Talmage’s virtues as an example for all to follow.

Celebrating Talmage Boston with burnt orange UT pride—“Oh, What a Night!”

Talmage Boston: Epitome of “Tikkun Olam,” “Take It to the Limit,” and “Forever Young” Read More »

Want a Better Quality of Life? Start with Better Sleep—Here’s How!

Sleep—just the word itself can conjure up all kinds of angst for those of us who struggle with getting a good night’s sleep. On this topic, I attended synagogue services last Shabbat in New York, and Rabbi Benjamin Goldschmidt raised a fascinating question: “Why didn’t G-d create us without the need for sleep?” Imagine how much more productive we’d be if we didn’t have to devote a third of our lives to sleep. His answer: “The purpose of sleep is so we can wake up each morning to a fresh start—the gift of a new day with all it promises. While we are awake, the angels in heaven are silent. But while we sleep, the angels sing.”

While those angels sing, the gift of sleep restores us and cleanses our brain. How do I know? I learned from the ultimate authority on sleep, Meeta Singh, MD. As we go through life, we make connections with people. Sometimes you have a feeling that you’ve met someone who is going to be a special part of your life. Such was the case when Laurie and I met Dr. Singh.

We were at a TIGER 21 Annual Conference, attending lectures and workshops. A session we eagerly anticipated was on Sleep—how to improve our sleep experience. Out walks the speaker, Meeta Singh, and the spotlight hits her. Dr. Singh begins her talk, and she had us at “hello.” Meeta commands every room from the moment she enters it. Meeta is a Michigan psychiatrist who specializes in sleep. Even more than the famous mattress store, Meeta is the real “Sleep Expert.”

Following her presentation on the science of sleep, Meeta fielded questions. She was hammered with some 50 questions, as this topic really resonated with the thousand or so TIGER 21 members. The Q & A dug into every imaginable question about how to improve our sleep, and Meeta popped out one succinct tip after another. 

The next day, a TIGER 21 chair from Michigan was trying to entice me to come to Detroit to conduct an estate planning workshop. Sensing my reluctance, he gave me an offer I couldn’t refuse. If Laurie and I would come to Detroit, he’d arrange a private dinner for the two of us with Meeta. Done! 

Our time in Michigan with Meeta was magical. We began talking and texting regularly. Meeta even came to Texas and conducted a sleep workshop in our own living room for some lucky friends of ours. A few weeks ago, Meeta gave another sleep presentation to my TIGER 21 group in Dallas. As always, she had us all spellbound and loaded with questions. Her talk was entitled “Bespoke Sleep Optimization: Your Blueprint for Optimal Healthspan and Longevity.” We learned that sleep is one of the premier keys for longevity (along with nutrition, exercise, stress reduction, relationships, and not doing “stupid things” like drinking and driving). The main end-of-life diseases that lead to death are heart disease/stroke, dementia, and cancer. Poor sleep contributes to all of them. Following her scientific presentation, we explored a series of practical tips. I’ll leave the science to Meeta, and will share a dozen of those tips here:

  • Develop a winding down routine. “When a plane lands, it doesn’t just drop to the ground.” Consider a hot bath, reading, and a spiritual practice (“meditation is a superpower”).
  • Aim for going to bed every night at approximately the same time (within an hour of variance). Your brain loves consistency.
  • Protect your sleep environment. “The bedroom is for sleep and sex only.”
  • Your bedroom should be dark and cold (65-66 degrees; “as cold and dark as a cave”). Your brain likes light, so don’t activate it.
  • White noise masks sudden sounds and helps you stay asleep—just keep the volume low.
  • Caffeine, alcohol, and cannabis all interfere with sleep.
  • Avoid sleep aids, as they prevent the brain from “power washing” out the toxins that accumulate during the day. Dementia results from the accumulation of toxins in the brain.
  • Before you jump to a sleep supplement to help you sleep, address WHY you’re having problems sleeping. (Meeta can help!)
  • If you wake up in the middle of the night (Marvin) and your brain starts to activate, don’t look at the clock. Start rhythmic breathing, reading with a book light, or listen to a podcast. Allow sleep to happen, and don’t focus on the fact you’re not falling back asleep. Nothing good comes from trying to solve problems in the middle of the night.
  • Naps are a good tool when you hit the time of day when there’s a dip in your alertness. The ideal nap duration is 24.7 minutes, which will restore you for the next four hours.
  • Getting less than six hours of sleep is unhealthy and leaves you as impaired “as if you drank several beers before going into an important meeting.” On the other hand, more than 9.5-10 hours of sleep is also unhealthy.
  • Dr. Meeta Singh has developed a comprehensive two-week program that provides a complete profile of your sleep (the bespoke Sleep Profiling program). It includes 10 nights of at-home sleep studies to evaluate sleep quality and rule out any underlying sleep disorders. Think of it as a baseline test—similar to checking the health of your heart or lungs—designed to assess whether your sleep is truly healthy. With Proactive Sleep Monitoring, the study is repeated quarterly to track changes over time and to proactively detect any emerging sleep disorders.

If you, like me, struggle with sleep, then Meeta Singh is a godsend. She’s the go-to consultant for professional sports, Olympic, and college sports teams, as well as many large organizations. In fact, irregular sleep is the number one predictor of an athlete getting injured. Meeta can help all of us. Reach out to her at meeta@meetasinghmd.com. She can also add you to the distribution list of her weekly newsletter “The Performance Sleep Bulletin.” I read every word of it, every Monday morning. Meeta is a gift in our lives that Laurie and I are happy to share. As she says, “If you concentrate on the Singh Method, ultimately your relationship with sleep will change.” Wishing you all the benefits from optimizing your sleep and improving your quality of life.

Marvin E. Blum

Sleep doctor Meeta Singh, MD (left) and Laurie Blum at a workshop in Michigan. The Blum family treasures our relationship with Meeta.

Meeta Singh, MD conducting a sleep workshop at the home of Marvin and Laurie Blum.
(screenshot) – The concluding slide from Meeta Singh’s “Bespoke Sleep Optimization” presentation to TIGER 21.

Want a Better Quality of Life? Start with Better Sleep—Here’s How! Read More »

What I Learned this Summer from Anne Frank

In my recent post about the Blum family’s “roots” trips to the Holy Land, ancestral home of the Jews, I stressed the importance of knowing your family heritage. Kids who know about their ancestors and their stories grow up more resilient and with a higher self-esteem. On top of that, I just learned from Kasia Flanagan with Everyday Legacies that there is even a correlation between knowing your heritage and career success. Suffice to say, there are powerful benefits to knowing your past. What’s the best way to ensure that your descendants will know where and who they come from? Document it. Elder generations (like me) need to record our history. And we need do so before it’s too late, before we die and “a library burns down” (in the words of Scott Farnsworth and Peggy Hoyt, authors of Like a Library Burning).

The best way to learn history is from stories. Stories capture our imagination and hold our attention. Best of all are stories of ancestors’ resilience. As author David McCullough wrote, “There’s no one who hasn’t an ancestor who went through some form of hell.” There’s no better example of going through hell than the story of Anne Frank. Knowing history like hers “imparts a ‘sense of navigation,’ a new realization of what we’ve been through and what we’re made of.’” (Peggy Noonan, “A New Collection of Works by David McCullough Helps Put Our Tumultuous Times in Perspective,” Wall Street Journal, Sept. 4, 2025.)

Over the summer, Laurie and I had a reminder of the power of Anne Frank’s story, as told through the most impactful personal memoir ever written: The Diary of Anne Frank. We spent a morning touring Anne Frank: The Exhibition, hosted by the Center for Jewish History in New York. The exhibit recreates the experience of the Frank family, hiding for over two years in a secret “annex” in Amsterdam until Nazis discovered them and sent them to their deaths. Only Anne’s father, Otto Frank, survived. After his liberation from Auschwitz concentration camp, Anne’s father returned to Amsterdam hoping to find surviving loved ones. It was not to be. But he did find there something else that proved to be meaningful. Miep Gies, the righteous gentile who hid the Frank family, handed over to him a stack of Anne’s writings that she had found and saved. Those writings were the key to preserving one of the most important stories in the history of mankind. To this day, Anne’s Diary serves as a reminder that we must never again allow hate to win. Anne’s words empower us. Even if the words we pass down to our next generations don’t rise to the level of Anne’s, they can still deliver valuable and inspiring messages.

At the end of the exhibit, we learn that Otto Frank submitted Anne’s writings to a publisher. The response letter blew my mind. The publisher declined to publish Anne’s Diary because it “wasn’t of literary value.”  Fortunately, Mr. Frank knew better and persisted. Fast forward to today. Anne’s Diary has been translated into more than 70 languages, selling over 30 million copies, and is widely regarded as one of the best nonfiction books of all time. 

I highly recommend taking a tour of Anne Frank: The Exhibition. It’s located near Union Square in New York, and the exhibit has been extended until October 31, 2025. The entire annex has been recreated exactly as it was, and you don’t have to fly all the way to Amsterdam to see it.

For those of us who underestimate the value of our story, I submit that we never know what meaning our words will have for someone else. It’s not necessary that our memoir reach a large audience. Even if we only touch a very few, or even only one, we may make a life-changing difference for that one. Katie Heck, Marketing Specialist at The Blum Firm, likened it to this fable her grandma often shared: “A man was walking along a beach after a storm and sees thousands of starfish washed up on the shore. In the distance, he notices a boy picking up a starfish one by one and tossing them back into the ocean. The man approaches and says, ‘There are miles of beach and countless starfish—you’ll never make a difference.’  The boy picks up another starfish, gently throws it into the water, and replies: ‘I made a difference for that one.’”

Katie joins me in urging everyone to record your history. Flanagan sums it up so well: “Heritage creates belonging, identity, and context to one’s life.” And telling of your journey “isn’t only to share the highlights and proud moments of your life, but to share the troubles and challenges too, along with the tools that have helped you be successful—your principles and values. People don’t relate to perfection, they relate to realness.“

So let’s learn from a little girl in Amsterdam who documented her story and changed the world. Someday, some descendants of yours whom you never had the chance to meet, may very well find meaning in your words and experience a sense of belonging to something bigger than the now—the power of knowing they’re a link in a long-lasting heritage chain.

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin & Laurie Blum at Anne Frank: The Exhibition, hosted by New York’s Center for Jewish History.

Though the Nazis murdered this precious child when she was 15, they couldn’t silence her. Anne Frank’s words live on forever through her Diary.

What I Learned this Summer from Anne Frank Read More »

Will AI Put Me Out of Business?

My best friend Talmage Boston regularly sends me thought-provoking articles that stretch my mind. A recent one speaks to a question that many have been asking me: “With the advances in artificial intelligence, do you worry that a machine will take over the estate planning profession and put you out of business?” The answer is a resounding “no,” and the article from Talmage helps prove my point. 

It’s true that AI will be able to replace many jobs (some predict as many as 300 million jobs). But per the CBS News Sunday Morning show on August 31, 2025, “AI will have a much harder time taking jobs involving empathy and creativity.” As I explain below, The Blum Firm’s version of estate planning isn’t formulaic. Our approach indeed involves empathy and creativity. It requires a person and not a robot to infuse an estate plan with values and meaning.

The article Talmage sent me dives into author Leo Tolstoy’s search for the meaning of life. In the late 1800s, Tolstoy published his two most famous novels, War and Peace and Anna Karenina. At the time, Tolstoy was struggling with feelings of despair. In Anna Karenina, Tolstoy echoed that despair in his co-protagonist, Konstantin Levin. Like many of the day, Levin abandoned religious faith in favor of scientific theory. As with technology today, the belief held by some in Tolstoy’s time was that science could provide all the answers. “Having accepted the scientific worldview in place of religious faith, he turned to it for answers, only to realize it couldn’t address questions of meaning.” (Professor Morson, “The Author and His Protagonists Find that They’d Sought a Theory in the Wrong Place,” Wall Street Journal, August 14, 2025.) 

Tolstoy’s “psychological crisis” over whether science could answer spiritual questions resembles the issue of whether AI can replace human estate planning advisors. Tolstoy (through his character Levin) comes to the conclusion that when it comes to matters of the soul and spirit, science falls short. “Levin’s problem is that he assumes, as intellectuals often do, that truth is a matter of theory that one applies to particular circumstances. That is how mathematics works, but questions of meaning and ethics are different.” 

After my first three decades as an estate planning lawyer and witnessing some bad inheritance outcomes, it hit me that there is so much more to estate planning than legal structures and tax minimization. I began describing a two-pronged approach to estate planning: head and heart. Both are important. The head side is still critical to the process. I’ll always be a technician and a tax nerd. But the head without the heart leads to Tolstoy’s despair. 

The heart side of estate planning has become my passion. We are dealing with real people, not paper. Families are complicated. My goal is to help families succeed. Certainly AI can play a role in the head side, helping craft tax structures and administrative provisions. But, though AI may have a head, it doesn’t have a heart. My mentor James Hughes describes five capitals of wealth. A thoughtful estate plan enhances all five capitals. Interesting to note, only two of the five are matters of the head: financial and intellectual. The other three come from the heart: human, social, and spiritual. 

For years, I’ve searched for the right label to call this kind of “head and heart” estate planning. Some call it “qualitative” (as opposed to quantitative) planning. Others describe it as “holistic” estate planning, the “soft” side of estate planning, or “family legacy planning.” More recently, I like the labels “values-based estate planning” and “purpose-driven estate planning.”

Regardless of what you call it, the ultimate goal of estate planning is to fill your life, and the life of your family with meaning. To do that requires taking intentional steps to prepare your heirs to live productive lives. It requires building trusting relationships with those you love. It requires defining your values and leaving an inheritance of not just your valuables but also those values. 

A good estate planning team can help you create and pass down a meaningful legacy. A machine can’t do that. A heart-oriented estate planner can help design trusts that incentivize and empower your heirs rather than create entitled trust babies. Science, math, AI, and machines can certainly come in handy, but they will never replace the human heart. 

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum (left) with best friend Talmage Boston, ever the source of stimulating thought to help tackle life’s toughest questions (especially when inspired by nature while hiking in Colorado, shown here).

Marvin Blum turns to Tolstoy’s age-old debate of science vs spirituality to question the role of technology in estate planning.

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Take a “Roots” Trip to Your Homeland

I want to talk about the importance of family travel. Taking a trip with family is far more than just a vacation. Traveling with family builds connection, solidifies values, and creates meaningful memories. I first learned this lesson from Mitzi Perdue, author of How to Make Your Family Business Last. Attending Perdue’s lecture about her book, I expected very practical takeaways about corporate governance, legal documents, and tips for bylaws. Shockingly, Perdue revealed the number one tip for making your family business last: “Family Travel.” 

Perdue explained the benefits of families getting away together, away from the day-to-day routine. Her side of the family (founder of Sheraton Hotels) does annual family trips, and her husband’s side (Perdue Farms poultry) does a trip every 18 months. Perdue’s ancestors were forward thinking and even set aside inheritance in a trust to endow the cost of this travel. I also advocate for a trust like that, which I call a FAST Trust (Family Advancement Sustainability Trust). Funds in the FAST Trust are used to pay for family enrichment, and are not available for HEMS (health, education, support, and maintenance) distributions to beneficiaries. I often propose to dedicate a life insurance policy as the source of funds for a FAST, so the rest of the inheritance can stay intact in traditional HEMS trusts.

In today’s post, I want take family travel and kick it up a notch. Plan a “roots” trip to visit your family’s homeland. Not only will you get all the normal benefits of being together, but the family can also learn about its heritage. Research shows that kids who know more about their ancestors and their stories (especially stories of resilience) grow up with a stronger self-esteem. They are also more equipped to handle adversity, knowing they come from strong ancestors who overcame obstacles. There’s no better way to discover your past than to go see it firsthand.

Raising a Jewish kid in the secular world (far from our biblical homeland), parents have to be intentional to connect their next gens with Judaism. To improve the odds, its often said there are three priorities: have a Bar (or Bat) Mitzvah, attend a Jewish summer camp, and make a trip to Israel. My first trip to Israel occurred in the summer after my second year of college. Israel was magical—the feeling of connection to my ancestors happened the instant I set foot on holy ground in the Holy Land. You literally feel it pulsing up through your body. There were many highlights, but number one was praying in Jerusalem at the Kotel, the “Western Wall” that surrounded the Holy Temple and still stands. Israel had only reclaimed possession of this holy site a few years before my trip, the result of winning the Six Day War in 1968. It was so significant that we no longer called it the “Wailing Wall,” as at last, we could celebrate there joyfully. It’s still the holiest site in the world for Jews.  

Our daughter Lizzy Savetsky’s first trip to Israel came in the summer before her first year of college, courtesy of the Birthright program that provides Jewish kids a free first trip to Israel. Lizzy spoke of it recently at the Hadassah National Conference: “For the first time in my life, I felt that I was just… home. Like I was surrounded by family. Ten days in Israel, and I felt more whole than I ever had in 18 years. I knew Israel was important to my Jewish identity, to our Jewish survival, but I did not expect to feel so deeply connected to a place I had never been. Setting foot on the ground there changed me at my core. Suddenly I understood that there was no separating the Jewish people from the land of Israel—that the people, the place, and the mission are all one. And as I stood at the Kotel for the first time and touched the ancient stones, I thought about my ancestors and everything that they had to fight through for being Jewish and how despite it all, they passed down our legacy from generation to generation so that I could have the privilege of standing there, knowing in my heart what my purpose was in this world as a Jewish woman.”

Lizzy’s words just proved my point better than any I could write. A “roots” journey to your ancestral homeland connects you with the past and equips you to build on that legacy for future generations. I heartily recommend it.

 

Marvin E. Blum

 

A young Marvin Blum on his first trip to Israel in 1974, discovering his roots in the homeland of his ancestors.

Marvin Blum (left) at the Western Wall of the Holy Temple in Jerusalem, the holiest site in the world for Jews ever since biblical times.
Lizzy Blum Savetsky (left, with best friend Sari Hochberger) at Jerusalem’s Western Wall in 2004, experiencing the same spiritual connection to her roots that her dad Marvin felt in that location 30 years earlier.
The Blum family returns to the land of our ancestors just days before the October 7th attack on Israel. Shown here, overlooking the Holy City of Jerusalem, are Marvin & Laurie Blum, Lizzy & Ira Savetsky, and their children Stella, Juliet, and Ollie.
Praying at the Kotel (Western Wall of the Holy Temple), Marvin Blum’s son-in-law Ira Savetsky passes down the heritage to his son Ollie.

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The Creative Side of The Blum Firm

A few months ago, as the Van Cliburn International Piano Competition wrapped up here in Fort Worth, I found myself reflecting on how much creativity surrounds me—not just across the city of Fort Worth, but also within my very own team at The Blum Firm.

Our team members excel in the highly technical world of law—true left-brain work—yet outside the office, they pursue incredible talents and passions that showcase their right-brain creativity. This balance matters. Creativity isn’t just for artists and musicians; it plays a vital role in the legal world, too.

In the realm of trust, estate, and tax planning, the most effective solutions often require both analytical precision and creative problem-solving. It’s that combination of left-brain logic and right-brain innovation that allows us to craft thoughtful, personalized strategies for our clients. As Albert Einstein once said, “Creativity is intelligence having fun.”

So today, in the spirit of celebrating creativity, I’d like to showcase some of the incredible talent we have on our team.

Lynn Kelly discovered her vocal talent in high school, impressing directors so much they paused auditions to call her father. She went on to sing in musical theater and chorus throughout high school and college, earning a spot in the elite Abilene Christian University A Cappella Chorus as the only non-music major freshman. She even sang the national anthem at her law school graduation.

Over the years, she performed with the Dallas Symphony Chorus (including a concert for Queen Elizabeth and one at Carnegie Hall), as well as several Fort Worth choruses and with Andrea Bocelli’s tour. A multi-instrumentalist, she plays piano, clarinet, and baritone saxophone.

Music runs in the family—her son followed in her footsteps as a band leader and oboist. Today, she enjoys playing pop songs on the piano in her home “music room” and occasionally shares performances with friends on Facebook.

Emily Hammond, a talented composer, co-wrote an original musical titled Beyond Perfection, which was recently selected for the Broadway Bound Festival in New York. The show has four off-Broadway performances this month—an incredible milestone that highlights her dedication to music and the arts. She shares her work under the name Emily Christine Horton on music platforms.

Cat Bardin is a professional stage manager, actor, and singer with a career that began at age 21. Her life has been steeped in theater—both professionally and personally. She met her husband when they were cast opposite each other in a musical, kicking off a 34-year “showmance” that led to marriage less than a year later. Their daughter even took her first steps backstage during intermission of a production they were both in—proof that the stage is truly a second home for Cat and her family.

David Bakutis, an estate and trust litigator at The Blum Firm, has spent nearly 20 years performing with a taiko drumming group. What began as a father-son activity evolved into a lasting passion. The group regularly performs at festivals throughout the Metroplex, and for David, it provides not only creative expression but also a powerful form of physical exercise and stress relief.

David is also a lifelong fan of British sports cars, inspired by his mother’s 1963 Triumph Spitfire. In 2003, he purchased a heavily modified 1967 Triumph GT6 and spent over a year and a half restoring it—sourcing parts from England, rewiring the entire car, and customizing elements by hand. The finished product blends factory authenticity with subtle modern upgrades. His story was featured in 360 West magazine, showcasing how he merges craftsmanship, nostalgia, and engineering in his free time. 

Amanda Jones has been a member of a community choir in the Flower Mound/Lewisville area since 2013, where she currently sings as a 1st Alto. In addition to performing, she served on the choir’s board for five years, holding roles as Membership Coordinator and Vice President. 

Eric Evans taps into his creative side through both music and visual art. He was once a drummer in a band and continues to enjoy expressing himself as an artist.

Other members of our team may not put their creative passions on stage, but they still bring joy, thoughtfulness, and authenticity to their artistic pursuits:

  • Kaitlin Goddard – Loves to sing and play piano, and also finds joy in interior design.
  • Ginger Melton – Finds peace and inspiration through gardening.
  • Katie Heck – Expresses creativity through painting and photography.
  • Amber Posey – Shares her heart through poetry and reflective writing.

Whether shared publicly or expressed quietly, creativity is a powerful force—and we’re proud to have a team full of it. Not only does it make each individual unique, but it also shapes how we approach our work with clients. At The Blum Firm, this fusion of head and heart allows us to deliver solutions that are both thoughtful and strategic.

I’ve seen that firsthand—not just through my colleagues’ talents, but in my own life as well. I myself am an award-winning pastel artist, and I’ve found that my work with color and emotion on the canvas mirrors the care and clarity I strive for in estate planning.

Now it’s your turn: What’s your creative outlet? I invite you to share your talent in response to this e-blast. Let’s celebrate the creative sides that make us whole.

Marvin E. Blum

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Banana Pudding Memories: Smells & Tastes of Yesteryear

How often do you encounter a smell or taste that takes you back to a time long, long ago? In building a lasting family legacy, nostalgic smells and tastes are important triggers for family memories. They conjure up people and places from the recesses of our minds. Aromas become symbols of love, legacy, and tradition, woven into the fabric of our heritage. I’ll share some of the long-ago dishes that are activating my senses, along with memories of the room where it happened. Close your eyes, and you will likely come up with some of your own.

I wrote a recent post about my nursery school afternoons with my father’s mother, “Memories of My Bubbie.”  Our ritual of watching “As the World Turns” was always preceded by chicken and rice soup, the same lunch every day. The salty smell and warm taste of that “chicken soup for the soul” still takes me back to that kitchen table with Bubbie and her sister Becky. I can even hear their Yiddish conversation, spoken in heavy old-country accents. My mind then turns to Bubbie’s Passover tzimmes, carrots baked with kneidlach (a matzo ball mixture), and I’m transported back to our Seder table. (Can you picture the smile on my face as I write this?)

Our daughter Lizzy was home visiting us and asked for stories about my other grandmother, whom we called Mama Pauline. Lizzy (Elizabeth Pauline) is named after her, and they share the same Hebrew name Pesha Ita. Naturally, Lizzy was eager to learn more about her namesake. We spent a month every summer visiting my mother’s parents Pauline and Meyer Oberstein in Montgomery, Alabama. Funny, but my memories all started in Mama Pauline’s kitchen. When we arrived, a banana pudding was always awaiting us in the Frigidaire “ice box.”  I have a lot to say about that banana pudding, as it wasn’t the phony kind you normally get today with instant vanilla pudding and Cool Whip. It started by separating eggs (they were brown, and some had a double yolk). Each egg was broken one-by-one into an empty bowl, in case there was blood in the yolk making it non-kosher. You didn’t want to contaminate the whole mixture. The yolks went into a vanilla custard, slowly stirred in a double boiler. The egg whites were stiffly beaten into a meringue. After we rapidly devoured the pudding that greeted our arrival, I would join Mama Pauline in the early morning to assemble another. She said there were exactly the right number of vanilla wafers in the box to complete her creation. One time, we were short one cookie, and she accused my brother Irwin of “snitching” one. He probably did.

Banana pudding is a dairy dessert, as it contains milk. Therefore, under the laws of kashrut (eating kosher), we’d have to wait six hours after eating meat before we were allowed to eat a dairy dessert. (You could get around that by eating dessert first; never a bad idea.) The Oberstein tradition was to eat a big lunch with meat (“fleish,” called a “fleishig lunch”), and a lighter dairy dinner (called a “milchig dinner”). That way, we could retire after dinner to the front porch “breezeway” for our banana pudding, served in red and clear glass footed dessert bowls). The house wasn’t air conditioned, so we would search anywhere for a breeze. Sometimes we found it in the backyard under the weeping willow tree, where we’d each enjoy a half cantaloupe filled with a scoop of Foremost vanilla ice cream that Daddy Meyer brought home from Meyer Oberstein Grocery. The memories always seem to come back to food.

So here I am, at age 71, suddenly a little boy back in the kitchen at 3200 South Perry, down the street from the Alabama Governor’s Mansion.  The memories keep rushing back. Thursday’s lunch was always “kekletten,” burgers made of ground beef mixed with eggs, matzo meal, onions, and garlic, fried on top of the stove. The smell of frying onions still tops the list as my favorite aroma, and research reveals that I’m not alone. Another favorite was the cinnamon smell when Mama Pauline baked her famous sour cream coffee cake. I also remember that kitchen on Shabbat when no cooking was allowed, though there was a hot plate “blech” on one low burner where you could warm up something without having to turn on the stove. Although most of the cooking involved making traditional Jewish dishes, Mama Pauline did let some of the Deep South rub off on her, introducing me to grits (still a favorite of mine, and I literally think of her with every loving spoonful). 

My list of family food memories goes on and on, drawing me closer to my ancestors. I suspect the same is true for you. We draw so much comfort from that connection to the past. Professor Catherine Sanderson’s blog post of July 17, 2025, “The Often Overlooked Perks of Nostalgia” concurs: “Reflecting on nostalgic memories may be particularly beneficial during trying times. One survey of over 2,000 American adults revealed that nostalgic memories are a source of comfort and inspiration when life is uncertain or difficult. These memories may feel so good precisely because they remind us of what is most important in our lives.”

Whether in good times or bad, nostalgic smells and tastes soothe us. As we work to preserve our family history, let’s be sure to preserve those wonderful food memories. Those recipes feed our family’s soul and help us weave together a rich family tapestry to blanket future generations with love. 

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s brother Irwin with grandmothers Pauline Oberstein (left) and Nettie Blum. Pauline was one wafer short making her banana pudding and suspected Irwin of “snitching” one. Looks to me like he’s guilty.

The authentic banana pudding, made with custard and meringue, rather than vanilla pudding and whipped topping.
Marvin salivating over his grandmother’s “real” version of banana pudding, along with other family dishes that conjure up important memories.

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Lizzy’s Ironic “Gift” of Addiction

Five days ago, our daughter Lizzy Savetsky reached another milestone. Lizzy celebrated her fourth sobriety birthday, commemorating the day four years ago when she hit rock bottom and ceased all alcohol consumption. Lizzy isn’t flying solo in this battle. She is part of a program with a powerful support group. Moreover, Lizzy encourages me to tell her story, in the hope it’ll help someone else embark on a recovery journey.

Two weeks ago, I re-posted my all-time most popular blog post. That post revealed Lizzy’s struggle with addiction and her fight to beat it. In that re-post, I promised an update. The story just keeps getting better.

As I expressed, Lizzy’s sobriety enables her to live a very purpose-driven life. She is dedicated to her family and to causes meaningful to her—battling addiction, pregnancy loss, fighting antisemitism, and supporting Israel. She stays busy on an international speaking tour giving heart-felt presentations on these topics, as well as promoting them on her LizzySavetsky social media platform. Lizzy is quick to say none of her family connection or advocacy would be possible without sobriety.

Here are a few recent highlights of Lizzy’s work:

  • Working side-by-side with the Mayor’s Office to Combat Antisemitism in New York City
  • Designated Israel’s “Voice of Iron” by the Knesset (Israel’s Parliament)
  • Serving as keynote speaker at the Hadassah National Conference, the largest and most influential Zionist organization in America.
  • Election to the World Zionist Congress, the world’s leading voice for Zionism, convening in Jerusalem
  • Recipient of Israel’s Annual Award of Bravery (designated the Brave Leadership of Zion Award) for her fearless advocacy, presented at the Menachem Begin Center in Jerusalem.

In an ironic twist, Lizzy actually is grateful for her struggles with addiction. She told me that none of these achievements would have happened without her fight to overcome challenges. I learned this irony when Lizzy came home to Texas recently to sing in the Johnnie High Country Music Reunion Show, on the stage where she grew up singing. (To the surprise of many, her public persona got its start as a yodeling Jewish cowgirl—now that’s an oxymoron!)

In that visit, Lizzy and I had the gift of hours of one-on-one father-daughter time. It was in that conversation that Lizzy explained the irony to me:

“Every single person is born with challenges that they have an obligation to overcome in order to achieve their purpose. Rabbi Shlomo Farhi, of New York’s Safra Synagogue, teaches that G-d creates each person intentionally with the weaknesses, with the character defects that we’re supposed to have, but also with the strength to overcome them. It’s only when we face those challenges and overcome them that we are able to achieve our true potential. So, if you think of it that way, then all of these hardships and challenges are truly a gift, because without facing them and overcoming them, we never become the people we are supposed to be. And if we had been born without these weaknesses and the power to face up to them, then we never would step into that potential that G-d places within us.”

May we be thankful for all our blessings, including the ones that come in disguise. Wishing everyone success in addressing whatever challenges G-d has placed in your life.

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky with husband Ira and kids Stella, Juliet, and Ollie. Lizzy’s sobriety is a blessing to both her and her family.

Lizzy stands side-by-side Mayor Eric Adams with his Office to Combat Antisemitism in New York City.
As part of Lizzy’s international speaking tour, she’s the keynote speaker at Hadassah’s National Conference.
The State of Israel designated Lizzy Savetsky as its “Voice of Iron” and also presented her The Brave Leadership of Zion Award, “For boldly standing up and speaking out the truths about Israel and the Jewish people, despite the consequences. We salute you for setting an example of Jewish bravery, strength and pride.”
On top of her other achievements, Lizzy can still yodel! Here she is singing “I Want to Be a Cowboy’s Sweetheart” on the Johnnie High County Music Reunion Show. Ambassador Mike Huckabee even brought her on stage to yodel when presenting her the Award of Bravery in Jerusalem last week, a surprise both to Lizzy and to the Israeli audience!

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Finding Joy in My 70s

Last week, I featured a repeat of my all-time most popular blog post, “Happy ‘Sobriety’ Birthday to My Daughter.” I wrote that post a year ago, expressing gratitude for Lizzy completing her third year of being sober. I shared how in a sobriety program, the celebrant randomly selected a card with a value to embrace for the coming year. The word was “joy.”  Given that Lizzy’s third sobriety birthday closely coincided with my 70th birthday, I decided one year ago that my goal for my 70th year was to experience joy. 

In that post, I revealed that I engaged in a values exercise with my TIGER 21 group. We each created a “values pyramid,” selecting 15 values from a long list and prioritizing them with the top one, then next two, then next three, then next four.  The group then constructed a group pyramid, and I was shocked that one of the group’s top five values was “joy.” The word “joy” was nowhere on my values pyramid. That wake-up call motivated my decision to prioritize seeking “joy” in my life. 

Here I am one year later with an update, as I now celebrate my 71st birthday. The feedback people sent me taught me a lot about joy. I’ll share some of those insights. 

One reader tied together the concept of joy with my daughter’s sobriety journey. He divulged that he is on his own sobriety journey, 16 years sober. Here’s his message: “The word ‘joy’ hit me really deep, as I only learned joy when getting sober. I was looking for happiness for 60 years, sometimes trying to buy it in the form of a bigger car or something material. It did not work; it did not last long. Happiness comes from outside and joy comes from inside. The challenge is to know WHO you are, not what you have done or what you are doing.”

The idea of identifying WHO you are especially resonates with me, now that I’m celebrating my second year in the decade of the 70s. Wall Street Journal columnist Peggy Noonan helped me process that when she quoted Rabbi Angela Buchdahl: “’When you’re 60 you’re at the peak of your power—running the law firm, the most respected doctor. At 70 you’re having to grapple with transitions, with who I am, and the aging of the body. It is the time of confronting the big questions of life…. This is a fruitful time to ask the questions about what we want to be. We are on a journey, all of us leaving a narrowing, constricted place for a place of freedom.’” (“Easter and Passover Lesson: It’s Never Too Late,” April 17, 2025) 

In my monthly TIGER 21 group meetings, I speak openly about my goals for this decade of life. As Rabbi Buchdahl says, the 70s is a time of transition. My best friend Talmage Boston advocates that we should periodically reinvent ourselves. Doing so allows us to avoid burnout, remain relevant, and stay energized. Turning 70 and entering this time of transition is a perfect opportunity to reinvent myself. Part of that reinvention is my commitment to writing this weekly blog, and hopefully soon collating my writings into a book on building a lasting legacy.

I am actively exploring how to make the most of this decade. The word “joy” is now a part of my vocabulary for this chapter of my life. I have always been notorious for postponing joy. I’m wired to put off joy till the future. Reaching my 70s, I realize (in the words of my former TIGER 21 chair Bill Case), “the future is now.” I’ve come to that realization more than ever since Laurie and I had a close brush with death a few months ago. We miraculously survived a rogue wave in Cabo that viciously tried to swallow us up. (See my post of April 29, 2025: “I’m Now a Cat with Eight Lives”) Indeed, since that trip to Cabo, I notice that I worry far less, sleep better, and embrace joy each day. 

I’ll conclude my 71st birthday recommitment to joy with wisdom from a dear friend and mentor Kasia Flanaghan of Everyday Legacies: “In the Book of Mormon, in a part where a father is teaching a son about the purpose of life, he tells him: ‘men are that they might have joy.’ I think joy is meant to be a more holistic emotion than we sometimes understand. Rather than just being a synonym for happiness, which can be fleeting, I think it is a capstone to feelings of gratitude, humility, peace, and purpose.” 

Kasia then asked if I would reveal my values pyramid, the one that omitted the word “joy.” In the spirit of openness and vulnerability, I’m attaching my values pyramid here. Although this pyramid was created several years ago, it still describes how I tick. The word joy is missing, but as I review it today, I believe the sum total of these 15 values adds up to a life filled with joy, the kind of holistic joy Kasia so eloquently describes.

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s values pyramid, prioritizing the top 15 selected from a long list of values.

Even without mentioning the word "joy," Marvin Blum's values pyramid adds up to a life of abundant joy. With “family” as the top value, the greatest source of joy comes from six grandchildren who call him “Zaidy,” the Yiddish word for grandfather.

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My Most-Read Blog Post of All Time: Lizzy’s Sobriety Journey

I’ve been writing this weekly Family Legacy Planning blog for nearly five years. I just discovered that we have data that tracks the number of hits a post gets. When we graph the data and look back at the level of engagement, I saw one huge upward spike. By a mile, the post that was most read happened a year ago entitled “Happy ‘Sobriety’ Birthday to My Daughter.” This shouldn’t come as a surprise to me. In my estate planning work, I’ve discovered that nearly every family struggles with addiction issues at some level. In honor of the anniversary of that post, I am reprinting the entire post below. But before I do, I’ll share one story that bears out my point about the multitude of families dealing with drug and alcohol dependency.

Several years ago, I was a member of an international family office network. Attending the group’s annual conference, I was intrigued by the agenda. It had all the topics you’d expect — investing, tax planning, estate planning, educating heirs, etc. But there was one topic that stuck out and didn’t seem to fit. The “sore thumb” topic that surprised me was a session on addiction. As it turns out, the addiction session received the most attendance and the highest level of engagement. Here I was in a packed ballroom with hundreds of wealthy families, and nearly every family was dealing with some level of substance abuse. That was a wake-up call. So, when I shared the story on this blog of my own daughter’s battle against alcoholism, the reaction from readers was the same as in that ballroom. 

Given the attention that post received, I will repeat it here in its entirety. I’ll follow up in the coming weeks with some important updates, as August 1st marks Lizzy’s 4th “sobriety” birthday. We are abundantly grateful.

 

My Post of August 13, 2024:
Happy “Sobriety” Birthday to My Daughter

Last week’s post was about my 70th birthday, which I celebrated joyfully a few days ago, and I now embark on my eighth decade with renewed energy. In today’s post, I want to share another birthday we celebrated this month in our family. With my daughter Lizzy’s permission (indeed, her encouragement), I am grateful to rejoice in Lizzy’s 3rd “sobriety” birthday. As I’ve revealed in the past, Lizzy is waging a very successful but hard-fought battle against alcoholism. August 1, 2024, marks the completion of 3 years being sober.

Lizzy encourages me to tell her story with the hope it will help others who are battling addiction. I am proud of her willingness to be open and transparent about her struggle with alcohol dependency. So many are suffering in silence. Lizzy is a champion for saying you don’t have to live like that. She acknowledges that it’s a tough road, but there is help out there. Don’t try to fight this disease alone. Find a program that works for you, like Lizzy is doing.

Thanks to her program, Lizzy enjoys a very purpose-driven and meaningful life. In addition, her whole family benefits from her ability to be fully present and engaged with them. In fact, Lizzy, Ira, and their 3 kids just completed a three-week trip to Israel, where they brought comfort to families who are suffering from losses and injuries due to the war that began when Hamas attacked Israel on October 7, 2023.  Their 3 kids are actively involved as well, providing love to these victims and to families of those still held hostage for 312 days now. Lizzy’s full-time mission is to fight antisemitism and support Israel through her social media platform, LizzySavetsky- work that wouldn’t be possible were it not for Lizzy’s sobriety. Laurie and I are very grateful and proud parents.

I learned this week that in some programs, a person with a sobriety birthday randomly selects a card that depicts a value to embrace for the coming year. The value one such person selected was the word “joy.” That person’s goal for the coming year is to experience joy.

That story brings to mind something that I experienced that I’d like to share. In one of my TIGER 21 meetings, we engaged in a “values exercise.” We were each presented with cards containing 56 values and directed to sort them into 3 stacks revealing how they apply to us: (1) always, (2) sometimes, (3) never. We then narrowed the “always” stack down to 10 and prioritized them, building a pyramid with our number one on top, followed by the next two, then the next three, then the next four. We assigned numerical weights and reported each of our results to the group. The group then constructed a group pyramid with the group’s top 10. It was fascinating to compare my individual pyramid to the group pyramid. 

Here was my main takeaway: One of the group’s top 5 values was “joy.” The word “joy” was nowhere on my values pyramid. It never dawned on me that seeking joy was an appropriate goal. As a person who is (obsessively) productive, I never allowed myself to prioritize joy. Seeing how highly it ranked with the rest of my TIGER 21 group was a big wake-up call for me.

A values exercise like this is a very meaningful activity for a family meeting. As I continue to promote family legacy planning, the cornerstone of that process is the family meeting. I commend to you to bring your family together and engage in meaningful conversation and learning, and in doing so, reveal the values that your family holds in common. It’s a great unifying activity—what I often call “family glue.”

So, as I embark on my eighth decade, I am choosing the word “joy” as my new word of the year. It won’t replace my other values, but as I celebrate this 70th birthday, it’s time to smell the roses.

I do have some dissonance advocating the idea of “joy” during these very disturbing times, as my people are targets for unimaginable hate and terrorism. However, rabbis teach that G-d wants us to continue to celebrate life, even in the midst of our suffering. My heart is heavy, but I can still feel abundant gratitude, and yes—even “joy”—for all the blessings in my life.

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky (pictured here with her 3 kids) celebrated her third "sobriety" birthday one year ago, a golden gift to her and her loved ones.

Marvin expresses his immeasurable love for his daughter Lizzy.

My Most-Read Blog Post of All Time: Lizzy’s Sobriety Journey Read More »

“Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make Me a Match”

I readily admit that I’m not a trained expert on the topic of parenting. However, from time to time, I have shared some tips from my own experience as a dad. The feedback is always affirming. People encourage me to keep the tips coming. So today, I’ll share a story about how Laurie and I gave our daughter Lizzy and her future husband Ira Savetsky a little parental “push” (well, maybe not so little) to get married. We knew they were a perfect match.

The story begins on March 22, 2007, in New York City. Lizzy was a singer studying music business at NYU. [Side note: Lizzy competed in an NYU talent contest which her classmate Stefani Germanotta won, and Lizzy placed second. Unable to win a college talent show, Lizzy abandoned the idea of a singing career. Soon thereafter, Stefani changed her name to Lady Gaga.] I came to New York for Lizzy’s performance at the renowned Knitting Factory. That night, I met some dozen or so young men vying for Lizzy’s affection and trying to improve their odds by buttering up her old man. After the show, she asked my opinion of the suitors, and hands down, my choice was Ira Savetsky—solid, steady, genuine. Lizzy’s response: “Ira? But he’s just a friend.” True, but he could become more. Lizzy acquiesced, and they began dating.

A bit later, Lizzy graduated and moved to Israel to study at Neve Yerushalayim. Ira moved to Philadelphia for medical school. As the year went on, Laurie and I were trying to entice Lizzy back to the US, specifically to Philadelphia. Laurie moved into action. She called the Dean of Admissions at The University of Pennsylvania, and the conversation went something like this: “You don’t know my daughter, but trust me, you’ll want to admit her to Penn for a master’s degree. I know it’s past the deadline and she hasn’t taken the GRE grad school admission test, but let me fill you in about Lizzy.” She proceeded to do just that. Lo and behold, Penn said yes. There’s nothing stronger than a persuasive (Jewish) mother.

Laurie then worked her magic on Lizzy, and the next thing you know, Lizzy’s at Penn getting a master’s degree in Reading, Writing, and Literacy with an emphasis on multicultural education. Now it was my turn to work some magic (with some important coaching from my mom Elsie).

We had recently “upgraded” Laurie’s wedding ring. I had sold Laurie’s prior diamond to the jeweler, until my mother admonished me: “Call the jeweler, buy the diamond back, and give Ira a call.”

The conversation went like this: “Ira, I happen to have a diamond that Laurie wore for the last 30 years. If it’s of any interest to you, we’d be delighted to give it to you.” Ira took the “hint,” responding: “If it brings us the kind of happiness you’ve had for the last 30 years, I’d be honored to accept it.” Right answer. Soon thereafter, Ira proposed to Lizzy at the Statue of Liberty.

I’m reminded of advice from Fort Worth educator Hazel Harvey Peace when she accepted the Multicultural Alliance Award: “Sometimes adults have to help young people make good decisions.” That certainly applies in parenting. I believe Lizzy and Ira were destined to marry even without our intervention (as we say in Yiddish, it was “beshert” – destiny). They’re a match made in heaven. But to aid the heavenly process, Laurie and I played the part of “Yente the Matchmaker” and nudged it along. We didn’t want to take any chances.

 

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy and her future husband Ira Savetsky, on the night Marvin first met Ira and knew he was the man for his daughter.

Lizzy’s engagement ring, beautifully repurposing the diamond her mother had worn for the past 30 years.
Lizzy and Ira returning from the Statue of Liberty right after he popped the question!
Marvin and Laurie Blum feeling enormous gratitude at Lizzy’s bedeken (veiling) ceremony, moments before her marriage to Ira Savetsky.

“Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make Me a Match” Read More »

Tax Planning in the “Big, Beautiful” Era

By the skin of its teeth, Trump’s “Big Beautiful Bill” made it into law. It’s no surprise that it passed with only Republican votes. When it comes to tax legislation, that seems to now be the norm. When we go back and forth between a “triple R government” and a “triple D government,” we can expect the tax pendulum to swing back and forth. I say this because these new “permanent” tax provisions aren’t likely to be “permanent.” Here are some “Musings from Marvin” on tax planning under the new law:

  • On New Year’s Day 2026, the estate tax exemption will be $15 million per person (plus annual increases for inflation, starting in 2027). I recommend locking in that exemption soon, before the pendulum swings back. The earlier you use it, the more benefit you receive, as you not only escape the 40% estate tax on the $15 million transferred, but also on all future appreciation. 

 

  • By doing “squeeze & freeze” planning with certain types of trusts, you can lock in the exemption but still retain access, control, and flexibility. 

 

  • If your estate is under $15 million now but you expect it to grow, now is the ideal time to transfer assets to those types of trusts. What matters isn’t what you’re worth today, but what you might be worth at the time of your death, which may be considerably more.

 

  • When Congress drafted legislation in 2021 to close estate tax loopholes (which fell only 2 votes short of passing), the proposed legislation grandfathered planning that was done in the past. By planning now under today’s favorable laws, the planning would likely be grandfathered upon a future law change.

 

  • If your estate exceeds the $15 million exemption, you can continue to shift assets out of your estate by selling assets to grantor trusts (as opposed to making additional gifts that would be hit with a 40% gift tax). Such sales are free of income tax. You carry a note that is still in your estate, but that note is “frozen” and can later be burned down.

 

  • With diminished estate tax concerns, the focus shifts to tools you can use to save income tax. For example, we have developed tools to achieve a tax-free basis step-up, such as shifting basis from one asset you plan to keep to another asset you wish to sell, using mixing bowl partnership rules. Other tools involve ways to minimize tax on the sale of a business, restructuring your business to benefit from expanded opportunities as a Section 1202 Qualified Small Business, Roth IRA planning, more basis bump ideas, and other strategies.

At least for now, we continue to be in the “Golden Age of Estate Planning.” In his Washington Post article of June 30, 2025, Professor Ray Madoff concurs: “Indeed, it has been 35 years since Congress has taken any action to close estate tax loopholes. As a result of this quiet quitting, tax advisers have developed a virtual alphabet soup of avoidance techniques, including GRATs and CRATs and SLATs and SLANTs and ILITs, and IDGTs – which have allowed their wealthy clients to effectively eliminate their estate tax liabilities.” True, but to make that happen, you have to take action. Otherwise, the federal government is your 40% partner in all your estate growth above the $15 million exemption. 

We urge you to fight the temptation to be complacent. We are living in a hot political climate, with heavy polarization and resentment. This political climate, combined with our nation’s $36 trillion national debt, make now the ideal time for tax minimization planning. Take action before the political winds shift and the pendulum swings again.

 

Marvin E. Blum

 

Note: Madoff’s article is entitled: “A Signature GOP Issue Is Omitted from Trump’s “Big” Tax Bill.”

Marvin Blum advises that now is the ideal time for planning to minimize tax, before the political winds shift and the pendulum swings again.

Tax Planning in the “Big, Beautiful” Era Read More »

Memories of My Bubbie

Last week, I urged all to visit with senior family members to probe their memories. Do those family interviews before it’s too late, or else a “library burns down” when they’re gone and we lose those stories. Ideally, do a video recording of the interviews, like the ones I mentioned of my Aunt Sophia, a centenarian still sharp until her death at 103. Watching those videos rekindled some of my earliest memories of my Blum family heritage.

I’ve previously covered stories of my mother’s parents coming to America from Ukraine and Poland. Last week I focused on my father’s parents coming here from Latvia, telling the story of my grandfather Isadore Blum. Today, I round out the family history with the story of my grandmother, Nettie Falkin Blum. Like my other three grandparents, Nettie came to America as a young adult, starting life in New York. Her brothers Yossel and Morris remained in New York, settling in Port Chester, but Nettie and her sisters Becky and Sarah eventually came to Texas. They never Americanized. They spoke very broken English, preferring their mother tongue Yiddish. Their only newspaper was the Jewish Daily Forward, written entirely in Yiddish.

My grandmother Nettie was small in stature and in her behavior, very soft-spoken and gentle. On the contrary, her older sister Becky Schiffer, was stern and tough. Becky was a seamstress doing “piecework” in New York’s garment district. She was a labor organizer with Socialist leanings. Her husband, Moshe Aaron (whose name was always slurred together and sounded like “Mashiron” to me) was a violinist who shared his wife’s liberal views. Had they not been tough as nails, they’d have never survived their persecution in Dvinsk, Latvia. Like my grandparents Nettie and Isadore, Becky and Moshe Aaron also opened a small grocery, located at 1327 May Street in an impoverished Fort Worth neighborhood. It was very common for Jewish immigrants to own some kind of small retail business and live in cramped quarters behind it. Given my grandparents’ suffering under the Czar’s rule in Eastern Europe, they wanted to own a business and control their own destiny. My father used to say he’d rather own a lemonade stand than work for someone else. My kids and I have evidently inherited that powerful desire to be self-employed.

I have vivid childhood memories of Nettie (whom we called “Bubbie,” the Yiddish word for grandmother). Both of my parents worked at Blum’s Café, so every day after nursery school, I was dropped off at Bubbie’s for the afternoon. Bubbie and her sister Becky (both widowed) lived together on one side of a duplex on Forest Park Blvd. in Fort Worth. Their life was very routine, and I was expected to fall into that routine. We lunched daily on chicken and rice soup at the yellow Formica kitchen table. I recall eating the broth first and saving the rice till the end, whereupon Becky said to Bubbie (in Yiddish), “He doesn’t like the rice.” In truth, I saved it till the end because it was my favorite. I’ve always been one to postpone joy. (I’m trying to work on that.)

Following lunch, we watched “As the World Turns.” Watching TV was not only entertainment, it was how my grandparents learned English. As a four-year-old, that show gave me a different kind of education. I became a couch-potato kid who was addicted to TV (though I preferred “I Love Lucy” over soap operas).  Following the daily episode, we all took a nap. I remember saying, “But I’m not tired,” whereupon my Bubbie replied, “You rest before you get tired.” In spite of that admonition, I have never been into napping. I suppose I lean more into my mother-in-law’s view on sleep: “I’ll sleep when I’m dead.”

[I feel compelled to add that my dear friend and sleep expert Meeta Singh, MD concurs with Bubbie. In her weekly blog post yesterday entitled What if the real brain hack is…a nap?, Dr. Singh advocates for naps: “A nap is the real shortcut to solving complex problems…. Even a 20-minute nap boosted insight and creative problem-solving.” I guess Bubbie was right.]

We cannot escape our roots. They have a way of informing not only how we look, but also how we think and feel, even as we grow old. Though she seemed ancient to me, I’m now as old as Bubbie was then. My grandkids call me Zaidy, the Yiddish word for grandfather.  I wonder if my grandkids think I’m ancient. I wonder if 70 years from now, they’ll be telling stories of their childhood times with me. Bubbie called me “Shayna Punim,” Yiddish for pretty face. Will my grandkids remember all my nicknames for them, and the times we spent together? I hope so, but just to be safe, I’d better get it all documented.

 

Marvin E. Blum  

Marvin Blum’s grandmother Nettie (far left) seated by her siblings Morris, Becky, Yossel, and Sarah.

Nettie (“Bubbie”) with grandsons Irwin (left) and Marvin.
Marvin’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky and Nettie’s mother Sanya Ita Falkin (Marvin’s great grandmother). Genetics is a very powerful force.

Memories of My Bubbie Read More »

Don’t Let Your Library Burn Up

I recently attended the 90th birthday party of my first cousin Jay Weinstein, the oldest living relative on my father’s side of the family. I used the opportunity to quiz my cousin Jay about our Blum ancestors, since he was around for 20 years before I was born and knows more about our Blum heritage than anyone else alive today. Fortunately, Jay is as sharp as ever and provided a wealth of information. I am so grateful I can now document those stories for future generations. Moreover, Jay provided me with a family photo drive and video interview they did with his mother Sophia (my father’s sister) who died not long ago at 103, also sharp as a tack until the end. 

In talking with Jay and watching his mother’s video, I learned some remarkable things about my family history. In this blog, I have stressed repeatedly the importance of preserving family stories. Research shows that the more future generations know about their ancestry, the higher their self esteem and the stronger their resilience when adversity strikes. The key is to document the stories before it’s too late. My dear friend Todd Healy made this point so impactfully by sending me the book Like a Library Burning: Sharing and Saving a Lifetime of Stories (by Scott Farnsworth and Peggy Hoyt). The book equates losing an ancestor (and all the stories in their heads) with the burning down of a library:

               “Each of us is a library, a living depository of vast amounts of knowledge, information, wisdom, insight, and life-lessons. Within us we hold countless treasures: stories, memories, eye-witness accounts, compilations of decades of personal experiences. This human wealth is profoundly valuable and intensely fragile. It can be easily lost to death, disease, dementia, or any of a dozen other causes. Unless thoughtful steps are taken beforehand to preserve and pass it on, it will be destroyed and lost forever.”

I have previously shared in this blog some of my own ancestors’ “library,” particularly how my mother’s parents escaped Hitler, immigrating to America from Ukraine and Poland. I discovered that both of my father’s parents also barely escaped, leaving their home in Dvinsk, Latvia to make a new life in America. My grandfather Isadore Blum left behind his parents Yankel and Gital Bluss.  Going through customs, Isadore attempted to write his last name in cursive English. The immigration officer thought the two “s” letters at the end were an “m,” and renamed him Blum. 

In America, Isadore and his wife Nettie lost contact with the relatives they left behind in Latvia. When they later had a son, they followed Jewish tradition to name him after a (presumed) deceased relative. They gave him the same first and middle names as Isadore’s father Yankel Velvel (calling him William Jay in English). Years later, they discovered that Yankel was still miraculously alive. After Yankel actually died, my father’s sister Sophia had a son. They decided to use the name again, also naming her son Yankel Velvel (but reversing the order in English and calling him Jay William). That’s my cousin Jay who just turned 90.

I learned from my Aunt Sophia’s video that my father was named for Yankel’s wife Gital Yenta (my great grandmother). There was some confusion about her name, but the mystery was solved when we found a photo of Yankel at his wife’s tombstone. Fortunately, my Hebrew skills are good enough to decipher her name. What’s especially remarkable is that my granddaughter Juliet Georgie is named after my father Julius George. Lizzy and Ira gave her the Hebrew name Yehudit Gital, unaware that she shares the name Gital with her namesake’s namesake. We only know her name because of a Latvian gravesite photo going back six generations from Juliet. This proves how important it is to take pictures and pass them down with the family archives.  

My grandparents Isadore and Nettie Blum somehow made their way from New York to Texas. Isadore was an iron worker in Dallas until his COPD was so bad they moved to Fort Worth, where he opened a downtown fruit stand. He lost that business during the Great Depression, but with the help of his four children (the youngest being my father), managed to open I. Blum Grocery on East Rosedale. The family lived behind the store. The grocery closed when eminent domain claimed the location. We say a prayer every time we drive down I-35 at Rosedale, as the freeway now passes over where the store once was.

I learned a lot more Blum family lore from my cousin Jay and may share more in future posts. Suffice to say, “we’ve come a long way, baby” from those destitute days at 700 East Rosedale. Knowing your family history is enlightening and empowering. I urge everyone to join me in saving your family library from going up in flames.

 

Marvin E. Blum

First cousins Marvin Blum (right) and Jay Weinstein, reminiscing Blum family stories at Jay’s 90th birthday.

The Blum Family in Dvinsk, Latvia (Marvin’s grandfather Isadore Blum is far right, standing next to his three sisters; seated by Isadore are his parents Yankel and Gital, with Gital’s mother seated at left).
Marvin’s great grandfather Yankel at the grave of his wife Gital.
Marvin’s grandfather Isadore (the shortest man) at his fruit stand in downtown Fort Worth.
Marvin’s father Julius as a boy, working at I. Blum Grocery.

Don’t Let Your Library Burn Up Read More »

When Little Moments Become Big Memories: Shabbat Dinner with Juliet and Lucy

A TIGER 21 colleague in Denver waxed poetic when he shared that our best investments are the ones that pay “memory dividends.” As his TIGER chair Elizabeth Ledoux punctuated: “Trips, traditions, little moments—these are what bind our families and keep showing up in stories, connection, and legacy.” I recently had one of those “little moments,” a seemingly insignificant event that turned into a big lifelong memorable moment.

Our family gathered in Memphis, Tennessee for our great-niece Paige’s Bat Mitzvah. That, in and of itself, was a big moment. Paige was born 13 years ago almost three months premature. Weighing less than a pound and a half, she was the size of a small bird that would fit in the palm of your hand. Miraculously, Paige fought through every obstacle and is now a thriving and totally magnificent teenager. So Paige’s Bat Mitzvah was a very big moment, as she led us through a two-hour service (mostly in Hebrew) like a pro. But what was unexpected was a “little moment” the night before.

The day before, our 10-year-old granddaughter Juliet flew in alone from New York, as the rest of her family couldn’t join us. We are very proud that Juliet’s parents (our daughter Lizzy and son-in-law Ira) are raising their three kids in a home with strong observance of Jewish laws. It was our pleasure to provide strictly kosher food and accommodations within walking distance of the Temple Israel, as Juliet’s family does not ride in a car on the Sabbath. (In fact, we rented a house Elvis Presley built for his infamous physician, Dr. George “Nick” Nichopoulos which Elvis also regularly occupied, full of Elvis memorabilia and decor, down to the shag carpet.)

The Friday evening Shabbat dinner was a 15-minute drive away (too far to walk), so we drove there before sundown to visit, and then I left with Juliet at 7:15 so we would be back at Elvis’ house (and out of the car) for the 7:30 Shabbat candle lighting. Our son’s 6-year-old daughter Lucy from Austin (inseparable from her cousin Juliet) joined us. So, it was just Juliet, Lucy, and me. 

The girls chatted non-stop in the car, and I loved hearing their girl-talk about school, fashion, and entertainment preferences. Then the “little moment” happened: the cousins (ages 10 and 6) took over preparing a Shabbat dinner for the three of us. Laurie had salmon ready for us, and the girls made a raw vegetable platter, a fruit tray, grape juice for the Kiddush blessing, challah for the Motzi blessing, and assorted cookies from Ricki’s, our favorite kosher bakery in Memphis. I’m no rabbi (though for years as I was growing up, I planned to become one), but the girls took over and didn’t even need my rabbinic skills. They led the ritual prayers, we shared our “rose and thorn” stories from the past week, and dined like royalty. (I have no pictures of the Shabbat dinner, as photography is not permitted on the Sabbath, but the vision is vividly preserved in my mind and heart.)

Here’s the takeaway: Stay on the lookout for little moments that will loom large in the family legacy tapestry your family is weaving.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s great niece Paige (left) and granddaughter Juliet celebrating the “big moment” of Paige’s Bat Mitzvah.

Marvin’s granddaughters, Juliet and Lucy, just before a “little moment” that turned into a big lifetime memory.

When Little Moments Become Big Memories: Shabbat Dinner with Juliet and Lucy Read More »

Should I Write a Book?

Marvin and Laurie Blum (Laurie on front row in long red dress with Marvin by her side) at a TIGER 21 retreat in Cabo, where stimulating conversations provide fuel for this blog, and maybe even for a book.

When I started writing this weekly blog over four years ago, I never imagined I’d still be at it, some 230 episodes later. I also never imagined the direction it would take. It began with practical tips on estate, tax, and family legacy planning. When I leaked in a bit of personal Blum family lore, the feedback shocked me. People wanted to hear more about me—the personal stuff, the stories, the lessons learned. I never expected this blog to become such an open book about Marvin Blum.

As a result, most of my blog posts have turned very vulnerable and authentic. The stories and life experiences seem to keep surfacing. Who knew all that was locked up inside? I certainly didn’t.

Even as I reveal more and more “musings from Marvin,” I do aim to tie them into estate planning and legacy-building words of wisdom. Remarkably that hasn’t been hard. Estate planning is both a “head” and “heart” endeavor. Most of my posts speak to the “heart” side of the estate planning process, helping families create a meaningful and lasting legacy.

It seems a daily occurrence when someone asks me, “When are you going to write a book?” I generally hesitate, and I ask: “What would be the topic? What would people want to read?” My blog is such a potpourri of subjects.

I had this very conversation with a lady at a recent TIGER 21 retreat. She told me she awaits my blog every Tuesday morning, eager for my weekly message. She then urged me to write a book. When I asked, “About what?,” her response was “parenting.” She looks to my blog for guidance on how to raise responsible kids, kids who have a solid core. The fact I have no training or special expertise in parenting didn’t matter to her. She sees the sum total of my work as guidance on how to create a family with lasting values.

Coincidentally, the next night at dinner, another TIGER 21 couple asked my advice on how to balance building a career and raising young kids, both of which (if done well) are time consuming. I acknowledged the juggle, and then offered some examples from my early years of growing both a law practice and a family:

  • Adam and I were both very early risers, so we had a lot of one-on-one interaction before my workday began. Early on, we built cities with blocks, made intricate Lego creations, and talked about his world. The activities and conversations evolved as Adam grew older.
  • Every night at bedtime was my time for one-on-one reading with Adam and Lizzy. We grew quite a collection of books, which I’m now enjoying all over again with our six grandchildren.
  • For many years, I blocked off every Thursday afternoon on my calendar as if it were a client appointment and alternated one-on-one afternoon outings with Adam and Lizzy. We called it “Special Time.” I remember how it started. A movie made me tearfully melancholy on how fast kids grow up, and I worried I’d look back with regret that I missed out on those years with our kids. Laurie came up with the idea of “Special Time.” The outings varied: stockyards, synagogues, parks, even cemeteries. I recall driving high up on highway overpasses so Adam could see how little the distant cars and trucks became. Lizzy and I sat under a tree in the Botanic Gardens and learned all the lyrics to Judy Collins’ “Both Sides Now” (which we remember to this day). Those outings slowed down the racing timeclock with my kids growing up so fast, plus they helped me build a lifelong connection with them. The memories of those “Special Times” now fill my soul.

After offering my thoughts, my TIGER 21 colleague Ryan Pearson said, “You ought to write a blog on this subject.” What a great idea! Building family connection is a key part of building a family legacy. Now I wonder, could something like this turn into a book?

Should I Write a Book? Read More »

Marvin’s Garden

From the time I was a little boy and even now, I’m a big fan of the game Monopoly. My childhood buddy David Lee and I would play Monopoly games that could last for days. I always hoped to be the first to land on Marvin Gardens, the last of the yellow properties, so I could buy it.

Growing up, I didn’t know a thing about gardening. But that changed when Petrita entered our lives. Petrita was from Cuernavaca, Mexico, “la ciudad de eterna primavera” (the city of eternal spring), and she was the most amazing nanny on earth. Her first day with us was the day we came home from the hospital with baby Adam. We knew Petrita was a gourmet chef, but we didn’t know she was also a master gardener. One day, I came home with a couple of flats of flowers, intending to plant marigolds in some big pots and periwinkles in small pots. I was all set to plant when Petrita rushed to the scene: “Señor Marvin, you have it backwards” (she said in Spanish). She took over, teaching me that periwinkles grow tall and spread out wide, while marigolds remain low and tight. From that day on, I was the student and Petrita was the teacher.

When Adam turned two, we moved to a larger house. I was about to pull up a mess of “weeds” in the backyard, till Petrita informed me those were wood ferns and a very desirable feature in a shady garden, perennials that would come back year after year. Once again, she rescued me. It happened over and over. One day, Petrita returned from a walk and rushed back down the street with a little shovel, returning with an inch tall “weed” that is now a sky-high gorgeous redbud tree. She saw it growing in a crack in the street and told me she had to hurry and get it before someone else spotted it. I assured her no one else would beat her to it, but she wasn’t convinced. Another time she was asleep on the living room floor, and I almost tripped over her in the middle of the night. She said there was a huge tree in our backyard making a “clicking” noise that was soon to fall on the house near her bedroom. It was Adam’s Bar Mitzvah weekend, but I had to have a tree man come take out the tree the very next day. There was no arguing with her. Sure enough, the tree was rotten on the inside and about to fall on our house.

Petrita passed away about 20 years ago, but she left me a very important inheritance: a green thumb. She is with me every day in my garden. I have nowhere near her level of knowledge, but I’m lightyears ahead of where I started. For me, gardening is therapeutic and rewarding, a source of instant gratification. It’s also my time to commune with Petrita, who truly became a member of our family. I continue to enjoy the legacy plants in my yard that she smuggled up from Mexico in her bra. She’s also with me when I wield the heavy garden axe she somehow hid in her possessions on another bus trip up from Mexico.

Gardening is very metaphorical. Voltaire taught us to “cultivate your own garden.” When we seek to broaden our horizons and meet a new network of contacts, we should start first in our own backyard. My daughter Lizzy became a champion for multicultural acceptance, teaching us to open our minds and hearts to those different from us. She learned from Stephen Seleny, Headmaster at Trinity Valley School, to first really get to know those in your own sphere of influence. Then you can branch out. Cultivate your own garden before you try to reach out beyond it.

Lizzy has also taught me the importance of weeding your garden. She knows I’m obsessive about pulling weeds, but she attaches a different meaning. She texted me: “For a beautiful life and legacy, we have to take the time to weed out any life suckers. This means toxic people, toxic energy, and toxic time commitments. If you don’t stop to weed the garden, you will never have the flourishing beauty you are capable of. Weeding the garden is a metaphor for how to create a beautiful life.”  On my 64th birthday, Lizzy posted a photo montage of me with the background music from the Beatles: “Doing the garden, digging the weeds, who could ask for more? Will you still need me, will you still feed me, when I’m sixty-four?” That song describes me to a T.

My family loves to tease me about the hours I spend weeding the garden. But now Lizzy praises me: “The more success one builds, the more life suckers come, voraciously attempting to feed off that success. As the gardeners of our own lives, each of us alone is responsible for growing and protecting the garden. If we allow one weed in, hundreds will follow. Nobody can weed the garden for us. Ask yourself, what time suckers, energy suckers, and money suckers can we weed out?” 

Lizzy continues: “Just as you cover plants to protect them from the cold, cover your life by acting humbly to protect it from the chill of jealous eyes.” In my post of April 18, 2023, I drew from the act of sprucing up my spring garden to recommend an estate planning clean-up. The garden metaphors go on and on.

When I’m in nature, I feel a heightened sense of civilization and peace. Catherine Sanderson reveals that those feelings put me in good company with other nature lovers. In her May 15, 2025, blog post “Why Lumberjacks, Foresters, and Farmers Are Happier Than Lawyers,” she touts “the underrated benefits of spending time in nature.” Jobs that are outside in nature produce the highest job satisfaction. Research in neuroscience proves “why people who spend time in nature experience better overall physical well-being,” as well as psychological well-being and lower stress. 

Surveys show that the least happy workers are lawyers. Lawyers especially need to get out of the office and spend time in nature. My “Canoe Brother” classmate from law school Cliff Ernst agrees. We have spent hours floating along the Guadalupe River in a canoe, discussing the therapeutic benefits of being out in nature and digging in the dirt. A master gardener, Cliff recently sent me a surprise package of native Texas spiderwort he dug up from his yard so I can plant it in mine. That’s a gift that will keep on giving.

In the realm of building a lasting legacy, gardening is a great way to do something to make the world more beautiful, as I often read to my kids (and now to my grandkids) in the inspiring children’s book “Miss Rumphius.” I suggest that gardening may also be a great family-bonding activity, or at least provide next generations a memory of the old man out in his yard, sweating, but happy as ever. I highly recommend you give it a try, but since you won’t have Petrita to train you, I recommend Neil Sperry’s “Complete Guide to Texas Gardening” as the next best thing.

Marvin Blum in his garden with the treasured axe the family’s nanny Petrita brought him from Mexico (surrounded by wood ferns Petrita taught him weren’t “weeds”), about to transplant spiderwort Canoe Brother Cliff Ernst mailed him from his garden in Austin.

Our nanny Petrita was a master chef and gardener who taught us so much and truly became a cherished member of the Blum family, pictured here with Laurie celebrating Adam’s Bar Mitzvah.

Marvin (right) with law school classmate “Canoe Brother” Cliff Ernst, canoeing for hours on the Guadalupe River discussing life, the law, and the wonders of nature.

Marvin’s Garden Read More »

“Does Fort Worth Ever Cross Your Mind?”

“Does Fort Worth Ever Cross Your Mind?” That’s the question posed by country legend George Strait in a song with that quizzical title. Here’s my answer to that query: if Fort Worth hasn’t crossed your mind yet, it will.

I’m a proud unofficial ambassador of Fort Worth, my hometown. Everywhere I go, people are shocked to learn we’re the fastest growing large city in the country. Even describing Fort Worth as a “large city” raises eyebrows. In fact, Fort Worth is now the 11th largest city in the U.S., rapidly closing in on a population of one million. And to all my friends in Big D, fasten your seatbelts for this reveal: The U.S. Census Bureau projects that the population of Fort Worth will surpass Dallas by 2045. “That’s right, in 20 years, Dallas will become Fort Worth’s little brother.” (“2050: A Peek Into Our City’s Future,” Fort Worth, Texas Magazine, March 2025).

I’ve bragged unabashedly about Fort Worth in prior posts. (June 13, 2023 and December 17, 2024). My last hometown post described a three-day “Discover Fort Worth” event I planned for TIGER 21, an international group with over 1,600 peer-to-peer learners. Those attending still express dismay at the enlightening experience touring the F-35 production facility, Modern Art Museum, historic Stockyards, visiting with local rockstars like Mayor Mattie Parker and business legend John Goff, and dining at Joe T. Garcia’s.

I was recently humbled to be among the “500 Most Influential” recognized by Fort Worth Inc. Magazine (Summer 2025). There’s no shortage of champions singing the praises of this great city, and I’m honored to be among them. 

I’m a Fort Worth local boy (as was John Denver, by the way), so I know it wasn’t always like this. It was once such a sleepy place that the legend has it there was a panther asleep on a downtown street (hence, the nickname “Panther City”). Over the years, Fort Worth has earned other nicknames: “Cowtown,” “Where the West Begins,” and now my favorite, “The Unexpected City.” Fort Worth is on a fast upward trajectory.

Here are a few surprise facts that make Fort Worth “unexpected:”

  • Forbes ranks Fort Worth in the top five cities in the U.S. for entrepreneurs.
  • WalletHub designates Fort Worth as the best large city in Texas to start a business.
  • Fort Worth is considered the top city in Texas for higher education (hosting a presence here are TCU, Texas A&M, UTA, Texas Wesleyan, UNT, Tarrant County College, and Tarleton State).
  • Taylor Sheridan and other stars are making Fort Worth the “Hollywood of Texas,” as the film industry has fallen in love with our city. As Fort Worth City Council member Macy Hill said recently, “It’s pretty cool to see Taylor Sheridan and Nicole Kidman walking around downtown Fort Worth.”
  • Fort Worth is a hub for the aerospace, energy, and tech industries.
  • Best of all, with all this well-managed growth, Fort Worth is preserving our rich cowboy culture with attractions like the Stockyards, Billy Bob’s, Stock Show and Rodeo, and the herd of cattle that still walks down twice a day, making the Exchange Avenue area the 15th most visited destination in America.

From my way of thinking, there’s no better place to call home than Fort Worth. We’re one of the few large cities embracing “Blue Zone” values for health and fitness, as well as the benefits of faith, family, and social connection. For years, Fort Worth tried to stay low profile and let our neighbor to the east enjoy the spotlight. Those days are over. The secret is out, and I suppose that’s partly my fault. Come see us!

Marvin Blum and wife Laurie, honored to be among the “Fort Worth 500.”

Marvin with legendary Congresswoman Kay Granger, Fort Worth’s “2025 Person of the Year.”
Fort Worth Inc.’s blurb about Marvin in the Summer 2025 issue.

“Does Fort Worth Ever Cross Your Mind?” Read More »

Jewish American Heritage Month: How My Grandfather Escaped a Russian Firing Squad to Make a Life in America         

In honor of May as Jewish American Heritage Month, last week’s post was devoted to my Uncle Joe Weinstock who saved his sister, my grandmother Pauline, from death in the Holocaust. Today’s post continues the celebration of my heritage, featuring Pauline’s husband, my grandfather Meyer Oberstein, who also miraculously escaped death from Hitler. Whereas the Weinstock story began in Polona, Ukraine, the Oberstein story began in Tiktin, Poland, originally part of Lithuania, and known as the “City of Scholars.” 

As was the custom, Meyer’s parents had an arranged marriage. Meir Polchovitz was seeking the most scholarly student at the Yeshiva in Grodno to marry his daughter Chaya Sarah, promising to provide him lifelong support for a life of Torah study. The head of the Yeshiva selected Elchonon Oberstein as the groom, and the match was made. In 1905, Chaya Sarah and Elchonon gave birth to their fourth child Meyer. Soon thereafter, Chaya Sarah was cut by a rusty nail. They took her on a droshky, a horse-drawn sled, to Bialystock to amputate her limb. But it was too late, and she died of blood poisoning when Meyer was still a nursing infant. The family lapsed into poverty. 

World War I broke out in 1914 when Meyer was a nine-year-old boy. With no food in the house, Meyer sneaked out after curfew to search for food and was caught by Russian soldiers. A firing squad assembled to kill Meyer when, miraculously, an old Russian commissar with a beard rode up on a donkey and told them to let the boy go, as he was only a kid and not a German spy. (Some mystics speculate that the old man was Elijah the Prophet in the guise of a Russian commissar, sent to save Meyer’s life. Who knows?)

In 1924, 19-year-old Meyer came to New York, the last of the four siblings to emigrate. His oldest sister Celia Bear came first, and gradually brought over the other three, saving them all from Hitler. Celia and her husband resettled in Florida and owned Pensacola Dairy, where Meyer and his brother Kiva delivered milk with a horse and wagon. Meyer went to visit his other sister Elka Katz, living with her husband in Montgomery, Alabama. At synagogue services, Meyer was spotted by Eliezer Weinstock, who brought him home for dinner (and to meet his daughter Pauline). It was love at first sight. They married, and Meyer was embraced by the loving Weinstock family. Meyer and Pauline had four children, including my mother, Elsie.

Meyer’s formal education ended when he was 10, but like his father Elchonon, he was a natural scholar. Largely self-taught, Meyer learned English and was an avid reader, explaining to me as he read the newspaper nightly, “You have to read between the lines.” He was a lifelong intellectual and deeply analytical, always searching for the inner meaning. His dream was to be a surgeon, but circumstances diverted that path and instead he was the owner of Meyer Oberstein Grocery in the impoverished Montgomery housing projects. He became the champion of his African American customers, helping them find jobs, and advocating for them vigorously when the law treated them unfairly. Even during the Montgomery Civil Rights riots and boycotts, Meyer Oberstein Grocery was never picketed or subjected to violence.

The sign above the grocery store just said “Meyer Oberstein” (not Meyer Oberstein Grocery), as it really was his alter ego. He operated it with lean overhead, with just him, wife Pauline as cashier, Jimmy the butcher, Baby Sister the clerk, and Charlie the bicycle delivery boy. My brother and I worked there every summer when we visited Montgomery for a month.

Meyer was also a devoted Jew and proud Zionist supporter of Israel. His mission was to sign up every Jew in Montgomery to join the Zionist Organization of America. His was the only Jewish grocery to hurry out customers on Friday evening in time to get to the synagogue for Sabbath services.

Today, nothing remains of Meyer Oberstein’s Jewish roots in Tiktin, Poland except an empty old wooden synagogue and a memorial by the pit where Jews were shot and buried in a mass grave. However, in another sense, Tiktin still lives. The number of descendants of Meyer and Pauline Oberstein alive today and actively Jewish is rapidly approaching 100. 

As Meyer Oberstein’s proud grandson, I am deeply honored that the first member of Generation Five on the Oberstein Family Tree is my granddaughter, Stella Savetsky. Stella is the first of hundreds of future Oberstein descendants. Her birth signifies our victory over the Nazis. Moreover, the way Stella lives her life today personifies the continuation of our Jewish heritage and our everlasting survival against all who oppress us. As we commemorate Jewish American Heritage Month this May, Meyer Oberstein indeed left us quite a heritage to preserve.

Marvin Blum’s grandfather Meyer Oberstein escaped death by a firing squad as a child in Poland, miraculously later making it to America as a young man.

Meyer Oberstein with daughter Elsie Blum, celebrating the wedding of grandson Marvin Blum, an occasion symbolizing his victory over the oppression of his youth.
Marvin Blum's daughter Elizabeth Savetsky (Meyer Oberstein’s great granddaughter) at Auschwitz concentration camp, defiantly joining a “March of the Living,” to reconnect with her Oberstein roots in Poland.

Jewish American Heritage Month: How My Grandfather Escaped a Russian Firing Squad to Make a Life in America          Read More »

“Galveston, oh Galveston” – How Our Family of Jewish Immigrants Ended Up in the South

“Galveston, oh Galveston, I still hear your sea winds blowin’,” and I still hear Glen Campbell crooning that tune in my ear. In the early 20th century, as Jews (including all four of my grandparents) began immigrating to America to escape persecution in Eastern Europe, most landed in Ellis Island and settled in New York. Many are unaware that a number of ships carrying Jewish immigrants diverted to the South, disembarking in Galveston, Texas. 

The “Galveston Movement” was an effort to disperse Jewish immigrants to the South to alleviate overcrowding (and growing antisemitism) in New York. Also known as the “Galveston Plan,” it was funded out of the personal pocket of Jewish financier Jacob Schiff, who contributed almost $17 million in today’s dollars. Between 1907 and 1914, about 10,000 Jewish immigrants landed in Galveston. The program ceased at the outbreak of World War I, bringing an end to one of the biggest periods of immigration in US history.

One such Jewish immigrant who landed in Galveston in 1914 (just in the nick of time before doors shut) was the patriarch of our family and the first to come to America, Uncle Yosef “Joe” Weinstock. It’s no small miracle that Uncle Joe became an American. Federal law excluded from entry “persons suffering from loathsome or dangerous contagious diseases,” as determined in the eye of Dr. Max Bahrenburg with the US Public Health Service. Bahrenburg deported seven times the number compared to Boston, six times that of Philadelphia, and four times that of New York. In his arbitrary discretion, “‘race’ showed a ‘preponderance … of serious defects which interfere with one’s ability to earn a living.’ More than one-third of the Jews he excluded because of ‘grave defect’ demonstrated nothing more than poor physique.”

Fortunately, Joe (a teenage boy traveling alone) passed inspection. He was met at the pier by Rabbi Henry Cohen of B’nai Israel, who put him up overnight in a hostel. The next day, Joe received a ticket to Troy, Alabama where he soon developed typhus and almost died. A religious Jewish woman named Mrs. Kermish took him into her home, rubbed him down with alcohol to take down the fever, and nursed him back to health. It was a close call that Joe made it past the evil eye of Dr. Bahrenburg.

May marks Jewish American Heritage Month. In honor of that commemoration, I devote this post to the story of Joe Weinstock. I featured Uncle Joe in this blog on May 23, 2023, “Grateful for My Strong Family “Stock” – The Story of My Uncle Joe Weinstock.” Click HERE to review that post, which I’ll expand on now.

Joe was the third of six children of Eliezer and Leah Weinstock. Joe left behind his parents and five siblings in Polona, Ukraine in order to avoid being drafted into the Russian army by the Czar. He was warned that remaining religiously observant in America (particularly in the South) would be impossible. But Uncle Joe defied the odds and remained “Shomer Shabbos” (strictly Sabbath observant) and kosher his entire life, even in faraway Troy, Alabama. He soon relocated to nearby Montgomery in order to belong to a synagogue. Joe bought a horse and wagon, going house to house selling fruit. 

Ten years later (after World War I), Joe had saved enough to buy a visa for his parents and two of his younger siblings, Morris and Pauline (my grandmother). By this time, Jews couldn’t get passports to leave the Soviet Union, so the Weinstocks were smuggled across the border into Poland, where they paid bribes to get Polish passports. Miraculously, they made it to America just before immigration ceased in 1924. Alas, the oldest two Weinstock children, Elke and Enoch, were married and couldn’t be covered on the same visa. They remained behind and were later murdered by Hitler. Sister Rachel and her husband were on a separate visa, but settled in Cuba, as the US quota for Jews immigrating from Poland was full.

Joe ran an ad in the Yiddish newspaper seeking a religious wife, and he and younger brother Morris married sisters Rose and Ruth Pass from Columbus, Ohio. Joe never had children, but he treated my mother Elsie and her siblings as his own. In spite of all his struggles, he was always cheerful and singing. One of Joe’s favorite sayings was, “I never had a bad day in America.” The Montgomery Advertiser did a story on him, saying “Weinstock came over from the Old Country with a smile on his face, and the smile never faded.”

Beginning in the 1950s until his death in the 1980s, Joe and Rose spent the High Holidays every year in Jerusalem. It was said that his body was in Alabama, but his soul was in Israel. 

If not for Uncle Joe’s courageous voyage to Galveston, our entire family would have perished in the Holocaust. In honor of Jewish American Heritage Month, I am grateful for the heritage I inherited from Joe Weinstock. His selfless devotion to our family and the Jewish people never wavered—from Ukraine, to Galveston, to Alabama, to Israel. To this day, Uncle Joe continues to give me strength.

Marvin E. Blum

 

Source of information in paragraph 3: “Study on Antisemitism in Texas,” Texas Holocaust, Genocide, and Antisemitism Advisory Commission, Nov. 1, 2022. 

 

 

Marvin Blum’s Uncle Joe Weinstock (center) prior to immigrating to Galveston from Ukraine. Joe is flanked by four of his five siblings (L to R) Rachel, Enoch, Pauline (Marvin’s grandmother), and Morris. Joe was able to rescue his parents and three of his siblings from death in the Holocaust, but was unable to save brother Enoch and sister Elke.

Joe Weinstock (center) with wife Rose and father Eliezer (whose eye was poked out in a pogrom against Jews in Ukraine). On Rose’s lap is nephew Leonard (now Rabbi Leonard Oberstein, Marvin Blum's uncle).

“Galveston, oh Galveston” – How Our Family of Jewish Immigrants Ended Up in the South Read More »

Buffett Retires, but Remains a Treasure Trove of Tips

Last weekend was the Berkshire-Hathaway Annual Meeting. Although we missed this year (in order to attend a niece’s Bat Mitzvah in Memphis), our family has a long tradition of gathering in Omaha. Family traditions and family travel (such as our annual pilgrimage to Omaha), create powerful family glue.

The bombshell from this year’s meeting was Warren Buffett (age 94) announcing his retirement. Thanks for all the years of imparting so much wisdom to us. We hope those tips will keep coming, even in Buffett’s retirement years.

Three times over the years I’ve had the privilege of being selected to ask Buffett a question. Topics range from his views on estate planning, philanthropy, business succession planning, to how to raise kids in affluence. People hang on every word of his answers.

I’m honored that my first question to him in 2013 is featured in a new book entitled Family Wealth, Inheritance and Well-Being (Claudia Tordini and Richard Franklin). The subject was Buffett’s famous goal to leave his children “enough so they can do anything but not enough that they can do nothing.” Buffett’s reply shows how he evolved from his original plan to leave each $500,000: “I think more kids are ruined by the behavior of their parents than by the amount of the inheritance that they [receive].” Buffett’s current Will reflects a more generous bequest to his kids: “I’ve loosened up a little bit as I go along.”

In a Press Release dated November 25, 2024, Buffett divulges more about his updated estate plan. “I change my will every couple of years…. Charlie [Munger] and I saw many families driven apart after the posthumous dictates of the will left beneficiaries confused and sometimes angry. Jealousies, along with actual or imagined slights during childhood, become magnified, particularly when sons were favored over daughters either in monetary ways or by positions of importance.”

Hence, Buffett encourages parents to discuss the estate plan with children and avoid surprises. “Be sure each child understands both the logic for your decisions and the responsibilities they will encounter upon your death…. You don’t want your children asking ‘Why?’ in respect to testamentary decisions when you are on longer able to respond.”

Buffett is hitting on an important point that no doubt will strike a nerve with some. In my early years as a lawyer, the trend was more towards secrecy. The “Greatest Generation” was reluctant to share information with their “Baby Boomer” kids. That trend has shifted in recent years to align with Buffett’s advice. My experience today is that parents’ secrecy has generally given way to openness with their kids. However, be thoughtful in how you do it. I strongly recommend a series of family meetings, facilitated by an objective family consultant. Don’t start with the money. Better to lead with a discussion of family values rather than valuables. The conversation can gradually evolve into appropriate financial disclosures as the meetings progress and the family coalesces.

Buffett’s Press Release also describes how he leaves his Berkshire holdings (which “now account for 99.5% of my wealth”) to a trust to be disbursed to charities selected unanimously by three trustees. The initial trustees are his three children Susie, Howie, and Peter. Given that they are currently ages 71, 69, and 66, he designated three potential successor trustees who are “somewhat younger than my children” –yet more good advice.

Buffett elaborates that, over the years, he’s gained confidence in his kids. “I know the three well and trust them completely.” Accordingly, he’s willing to put them in charge. As to why unanimous, he reasons it’ll be easier for a child to say no when “besieged with earnest requests from very sincere friends and others” if they can blame their siblings. He or she can just respond, “It’s not something that would ever receive my brother’s consent.”

But Buffett acknowledges: “My unanimity clause, of course, is not a panacea—it clearly isn’t workable if you have nine or ten children or stepchildren. And it doesn’t solve the daunting problem of intelligently distributing many billions annually.” That “daunting” task will fall on shoulders of Susie, Peter, and Howie. Buffett knows that’ll be a burden, as “they have different views in many cases from both me and their siblings but have common values that are unwavering.” For example, like their dad, they have all eschewed “look at me” lifestyles.

Truly, Buffett comes through again with his treasure trove of tips. Given my passion to help families create a lasting legacy, Buffett’s focus on identifying and celebrating a family’s “common values” is particularly music to my ears. With all of his practical wisdom, Buffett is every estate planner’s best friend. So, thank you to my friend Warren, and congratulations on your well-earned retirement! You are a gift that keeps on giving.

Marvin and Laurie Blum with their hero Warren Buffett.

Marvin Blum (left) at an annual gathering with family at a Berkshire-Hathaway annual meeting.

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I’m Now a Cat with Eight Lives

Life is fragile, I knew that intellectually. Now I know it in a real sense. Laurie and I began a glorious trip to Cabo, each with nine lives. We returned home full of gratitude, but now each with eight lives. We each donated one of our lives to the Pacific Ocean. We were almost swept away in a high tide, but thankfully in the battle of man vs. sea, we miraculously won.

The adventure began on a picture-postcard afternoon. The beach was calling out to us to take a walk in the sand. We were walking far from the water’s edge at what we thought was a safe distance inland. Suddenly, one of the biggest waves I’ve ever seen came crashing down on us, knocking us over and swallowing us up. The undertow was fierce and the current was pulling us toward the ocean with a powerful force. As determined as the water was to win, we were even more determined to live.

The tug-of-war happened fast, but I can now look back on it in slow motion. Reflecting on it, I have these observations.

  • When threatened, the human body is an amazing machine. A Samson-like superpower kicks in. We are stronger than we realize. When the wave struck us, our adrenaline rushed in, giving us the muscle to claw into the sand and grab each other so tightly that no force could overcome us.
  • When you think the end may be near, there’s a moment of awareness. Do I have any regrets, any unfinished business? Remarkably, I actually remember feeling that if this is the end, I am at peace. There’s great comfort in that.
  • When the episode is over and the mind calms, it’s time for a serious life inventory. At this time in my life, what are my priorities, and am I devoting my time and energy to them? Have I properly prepared my loved ones to carry on without me? Are my affairs in order?

I already knew this, but after our close call, the message is now even more loud and clear: Live each day as if it could be your last. The Roman philosopher Seneca said it this way: “Let us prepare our minds as if we’d come to the very end of life. Let us postpone nothing. Let us balance life’s books each day…. The one who puts the finishing touches on their life each day is never short on time.”

When I was a little boy, my aunt Gertie Miller used to say, “Tomorrow is not promised to us.” Now I know what she meant.

 

Marvin and Laurie Blum moments before a walk on the beach and almost being swallowed up by the ocean. Remarkably, although Marvin injured his left bicep, his phone died, and Laurie donated her hat to the sea, they emerged alive.

Marvin and Laurie the next evening, with their serenity restored.

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Giving Back: Don’t Just Write a Check, Roll Up Your Sleeves

When it comes to creating a family legacy, philanthropy can play a very powerful role. When a family comes together to support meaningful causes, it serves as very strong family “glue.” Even though not everyone has the skills to work in a family’s business or investments, everyone can play a role in family philanthropy. Managing a philanthropic vehicle (like a family foundation) is also a laboratory for learning life skills. In addition to the gratification that comes from helping those in need, family members learn how to make group decisions, build bridges of communication and trust, and may even learn some financial, investing, and tax concepts. Philanthropy definitely provides a “win-win,” benefitting not only the recipient of it, but also enriching the family who does the giving.

When we hear the word “philanthropy,” the first thing that usually comes to mind is writing a check. Giving of our financial resources is an important part, but there are more ways to give than just by giving money. Charities often promote the “Three T’s,” urging us to give not only of our Treasure, but also of our Time and Talent. I’ll add a “Fourth T:” Toil. By digging into a cause and “getting our hands dirty,” we expand the “win” that comes back to the one who is giving. 

The Case Bogart Perspectives essay “Why Give?” (www.casebogart.com) explains that heirs participating in philanthropic activities receive an “essential transformation in their development of empathy, character, leadership skills, and life purpose.” Empathy comes from witnessing firsthand the impact of their charitable work, “fostering a deeper understanding of social issues and true human need.” Organizing charitable events and doing legwork teaches leadership skills, as well as “project management and strategic planning.” The interaction with diverse individuals expands the volunteer’s network and teaches “teamwork, communication, and problem-solving.” All of these benefits build character and instill life purpose, inspiring “a person to get out of bed each morning with something they want to accomplish outside of themselves.”

The Case Bogart essay got me thinking of some examples from my own life experience. The Blum Family is a big proponent of “hands-on” philanthropy. A few come quickly to mind: Laurie’s work with Meals on Wheels, Lizzy’s interaction with hostage families and IDF widows and orphans in Israel, Adam’s work with Gov. Abbott to fight antisemitism in Texas. Allow me to share a couple more examples from me and from my mom Elsie.

For over 30 years, I’ve been active with Fort Worth’s Multicultural Alliance (MCA), participating in programs to promote acceptance and understanding of those different from us. One such experience particularly stands out. I took a week off work to serve (along with my daughter Lizzy) as a counselor at Camp Anytown (now called Camp CommUNITY). We bring together high school students from diverse backgrounds to break down barriers of prejudice, bias, and hate. Remarkably, over the course of that life-changing week, campers leave with newfound open minds and open hearts, understanding and embracing people they’d never have imagined knowing. I facilitated conversations in share groups, we learned of each other’s cultures and backgrounds, and I even taught an art class to an eager group of kids excited about exploring their talents. At the end, I confessed that I had been reluctant to serve as a counselor, for fear that as a very uncool lawyer, I’d never be able to connect with a bunch of high school kids. One of my favorite takeaways from Camp was when the kids responded resoundingly: “Marvin, you cool!” Who knew? Even I emerged from camp with a much more open mind and open heart. I applied those lessons later when I facilitated an MCA Table Talk program for diverse students at Texas A&M Law School, and again at a program I gave for financial executives “Conversations are the Currency for Change.” My hands-on experiences at MCA have been life-changing for me.

I’ll wrap up with a couple of examples from my personal hero, my mother Elsie. For my entire life, I’ve watched my mom roll up her sleeves and work tirelessly at our synagogue. When my dad died 22 years ago, I often said that my mom “remarried,” and the marriage was to our synagogue. She became a full-time volunteer, single-handedly overseeing the synagogue kitchen and catering operation, supervising adherence to the Jewish laws of kashrut (kosher food laws), and working there literally seven days a week. But there’s another volunteer activity she took very seriously that I’ve never mentioned: serving on the Chevra Kadisha to wash and dress deceased Jewish women to prepare them for burial. It’s an ancient ritual that happens in prayerful silence, concluding with closing the coffin and thanking the deceased woman for the opportunity to prepare her for her final journey. In the Jewish religion, it’s considered a sacred honor. As Rabbi Isadore Garsek explained to my mom when she joined the group, this is the most selfless of all volunteer work, because the woman you are doing it for can never thank you for it. It’s hard to imagine a more meaningful type of “hands-on” philanthropy.

In summary, philanthropy goes well beyond just taking out your wallet.   When the volunteerism involves committing your hands to an activity, you truly get back way more than you give.

Marvin Blum and daughter Lizzy as counselors at Camp Anytown (now called Camp CommUNITY), sponsored by the Multicultural Alliance (MCA) of Fort Worth.

Marvin facilitating an MCA Table Talk to help diverse law students achieve acceptance and cross-cultural understanding.
Marvin’s mother Elsie Blum (center) supervising the synagogue catering operation.

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Family Traditions: The Blum Passover Seder Is Much More Than a Meal

Four generations of Blums gathered this week to preserve Passover family traditions (matriarch Elsie; Marvin & Laurie; Adam & Brooke; Lucy, Grey, & Mia). Lucy holds a vintage Haggadah created 35 years ago by Adam and his sister Lizzy, still used to this day at Blum Seders to tell the Passover story.

“Tradition! Tradition! Without our traditions, our lives would be as shaky as a Fiddler on the Roof!” There’s a lot of truth in Tevye’s lyrics. Looking back over my 70 years, an annual Blum family tradition that helps keep our family steady is coming together to celebrate Passover. We are now in the week of Passover, rushing a lifetime of family memories into my mind.

Research shows that 90% of families fall victim to the adage “Shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in three generations.” Shockingly, only 10% beat the odds. What are the best practices of those successful 10% that we can try to copy in our own families? In my own research, I compiled a list of the Top Ten Best Practices, as revealed in the slide below. Note that one of those 10 is Family Traditions, and the graphic next to it is an oak tree. Indeed, traditions keep us from falling off the roof, deeply rooted so we’re as steady as an oak tree when the winds of adversity blow our way.  

My dear friend Kasia Flanagan at everydaylegacies.com teaches this truth in her post “What Are Your Traditions?”: “Traditions—they are not simply what we do, they become who we are, affecting everything from our identity to our sense of belonging, and the purpose we feel in our lives.”

My Passover memories take me back to the earliest days of my youth. The Blum family gathered each year for a Seder at the home of my father’s sister, Aunt Sophie Weinstein. A long row of tables was pushed together running the entire length of the “front room,” with Uncle Max at the head leading the first night’s Seder supper. From very old to very young, everyone participated. We went person-to-person down the table, each reading aloud the next passage from the Haggadah, the Passover story. I remember counting ahead to identify my passage so I could practice in my head before it was my turn. There were some hard words in the text, as Moses shouted “Let my people go!” and Pharaoh obstinately refused until the last of the Ten Plagues.

The Blum’s kid-friendly Seder features eyeglasses depicting the Ten Plagues.

When Laurie and I married, we took over hosting the Blum Passover Seder. Our children, Adam and Lizzy, played major roles in the preparations. Most significantly, they compiled their own version of the Haggadah, a 41-page kid-friendly retelling of the Passover story. To this day, we use that Haggadah, as do a number of other families who have likewise fallen in love with the Blum version.

Another Seder memory was a skit performed every year by Lizzy and her best friend Sari Hochberger. It was unscripted and very clever, complete with numerous costume changes. It started with baby Moses hidden in a basket among the reeds by his sister Miriam, then to Pharaoh torturing a Jewish slave, and on to G-d (speaking through a burning bush) directing Moses to tell Pharaoh to “let my people go!’ They then graphically acted out each of the Ten Plagues, culminating in the death of the first born. The memories go on and on, and now we’re creating a whole generation of new Blum Passover traditions.

During this Passover holiday, Marvin Blum celebrates family traditions from Passovers past. Here (some 30 years ago), daughter Lizzy (right) portrays the burning bush through which G-d instructs Moses (acted by best friend Sari Hochberger) to tell Pharaoh: “Let my people go!”

Click HERE to revisit my post of Sept. 14, 2021, “Tradition, Tradition! Your Family Traditions Matter More Than You May Realize.” In it I quoted from Mitzi Perdue’s book What It Means to Be Us, describing traditions as the “lifeblood of a family’s identity” – “the more traditions, the more glue.” I also referred to Bruce Feiler’s book The Secrets of Happy Families, telling of a Duke family tradition from their weekly Shabbat dinners. Grandfather Duke would fling yarmulkes like a Frisbee onto each grandson’s head. Feiler asked, “Is this in the Torah?” The family replied, “No, it’s in the Duke Family Hall of Fame, and that’s much more important.”

Traditions such as these are more important indeed. They are essential to our survival as a family. I attended a Shabbat sermon by Rabbi Shlomo Farhi where he actually broke into song “I’m Still Standing.” Rabbi Farhi credits Jewish observance and practices as the reason we’re “still standing,” even after centuries of persecution (still occurring today at an alarming rate). Even on the way to the gas chamber, Holocaust victims sang in Yiddish, “We will outlive them.” Deeply rooted in our traditions and identity, no adversity will destroy us.

As I write the last paragraph of this post on the morning of tonight’s first Seder, two of my grandkids (Lucy and Grey) just happily interrupted my flow to ask how they’ll be able to find tonight’s Afikomen, the piece of matza we hide during the Seder so kids can find it and get a prize. I can see in their twinkling eyes the makings of lifetime memories and a new generation of Blum family traditions.

Wishing all of you a happy and meaningful Passover and Easter.

As the Blum Seder concluded, a very excited Grey & Lucy find the Afikomen (the hidden matza) and claim their prize, making more lifetime memories and family connection.

Family Traditions: The Blum Passover Seder Is Much More Than a Meal Read More »

Alright, Alright, Alright: Kay McConaughey, Anna Stucker, and Other Longevity Role Models

Today’s post wraps up a 3-part series on How to Add 7 ½ Years to Your Life. Let’s celebrate and learn from some role models.

  • Anna Stucker: I’ll start with this remarkable centenarian who turns 100 in two days on April 10. Anna is a vibrant role model of staying engaged and fit. She is also 100% mentally sharp and as smart as ever. Anna’s daily work-out regimen not only keeps her fit, it also provides interaction with a community of other fitness enthusiasts. Moreover, Anna can still fit into her Jayhawks cheerleader uniform from her days as a University of Kansas cheerleader!
  • Elsie Blum: I’ll turn next to the role model I know best, my mother Elsie. I’ve written often about her successful transition into her senior years. Now a vibrant 94 who is also still 100% mentally sharp, I credit her community involvement as the primary reason for her success. When my dad died 21 years ago, my mom took over the catering operation at our synagogue as a full-time volunteer. At 90, she moved into the Stayton, a fabulous senior community where she thrives in all their programs and social activities. With her ever-present smile and positive mental attitude, she declares (in her “Lady Bird Johnson” southern accent): “I’m living in the lap of luxury!” It’s not just that her apartment is beautiful, but what she really means is that her life is luxurious. 
  • Opal Lee: Fort Worth’s 98-year-old “Grandmother of Juneteenth” is another example of longevity propelled by purposeful living. Lee’s courage led to her being awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the nation’s highest civilian honor. She single-handedly led the charge to get June 19 (“Juneteenth”) declared the 11th federal holiday. Lee overcame the adversity of seeing 500 white rioters burn down her home on Juneteenth in 1939. That spurred her to a life of activism. Upon receiving the 2023 Lifetime Achievement Award from Fort Worth’s Multicultural Alliance, Lee challenged us to “make yourself a committee of one” to fight for a cause meaningful to you, and others will join you. That passion not only sustains Opal Lee, it keeps her forever young.
  • John Scharffenberg: Another 100-year-old role model is this longevity expert. His M.O.? Exercise! “For every hour you exercise, you gain three additional hours of life.” Per Scharffenberg, working out not only extends life, it reduces risk of Alzheimer’s. It doesn’t have to be in the gym. Gardening or farming works just as well.
  • Jane Fonda: The Oscar-winning actress, now 87, is another fitness guru who recently revealed on the CBS “Sunday Morning” show her key to living longer. Per Fonda, it’s all about having a good attitude. The number one way to do that is to join a community, whether it’s painting, singing, dancing, exercising, or flower arranging. Doing so reduces stress, makes us braver, kinder to ourselves, and less judgmental.
  • Kay McConaughey: The 93-year-old mother of Matthew is a “razor sharp firecracker,” per Jennifer Birn’s recent Austin Lifestyle article “Life and Lessons from Kay McConaughey.” Her secret? “I eat clean. I exercise and I don’t stress… You are what you eat, and you are what you think… That’s why I think positive.” Her favorite food is salmon, reminding me of a TIGER 21 lecture from Dr. Jonathan Fialkow, a certified lipidologist, who declared salmon as the “number one food on the planet.” She also keeps up with current events and stays curious, a role model for Chip Conley’s definition of a “Modern Elder” as one who is as curious as you are wise.

McConaughey sees happiness as a choice. She overcame struggles with her mother and stepmother, determined to not be like them. “I’m a happy, happy, happy person… I don’t talk negative. I’ve chosen to be happy, in spite of the way that I was treated by those two women. You have a choice.”

I see some themes emerging here—community, mental and physical fitness, purpose-driven passions all making you “happy, happy, happy.” And as Kay’s son Matthew would say, “Alright, Alright, Alright!”

Marvin Blum with Anna Stucker, celebrating her 100th birthday this month. Anna is a role model for fitness and a positive attitude.

Marvin Blum and Opal Lee, the purpose-driven 98-year-old “Grandmother of Juneteenth.”
Kay McConaughey (Matthew's Mother) shares tips on staying "happy, happy, happy," to which her son would reply, "Alright, Alright, Alright!"

Alright, Alright, Alright: Kay McConaughey, Anna Stucker, and Other Longevity Role Models Read More »

Be a Block of Jade, Not a Blank Canvas

Based on the feedback from last week’s post, a lot of you want to learn more about how to live 7 ½ more years. I dug deeper into the science, this time from Professor Arthur Brooks’ weekly column “Happiness Is an Investment” (Dec. 2, 2024) and his recent speech at a TIGER 21 conference (Jan. 29, 2025). Here are more tips on how to live a longer, and happier, life.

As we strive for longevity, Brooks’ emphasis is on finding happiness in the second half of life. He describes the “U-Curve of Happiness.” We are actually happiest at the beginning and end of our lives. Happiness starts declining at age 16, bottoms out at 52, and then goes up again. The goal is for the curve to keep going up for as long as you live.

However, there’s a phenomenon at about age 70. Half keep getting happier, but the other half goes back down again. Research at the University of Texas described this as the “Striver’s Curse.” Those who were high achievers begin to feel irrelevant and unhappier late in life. Brooks gives the example of scientist Charles Darwin, world-famous by age 27, but after 50 with no new research he could do, he died 19 years later as a broken man.

When the fork in the road appears, the key to taking the high road rather than the low road is to celebrate a new kind of intelligence in later years. Shift from “fluid intelligence” (complex problem-solving and innovation, which declines with age) to “crystallized intelligence” (wisdom, judgment, and teaching skills, which increases with age). Per Brooks, that’s why teachers older than 65 get better teacher evaluations. When young, do innovation; when old, do instruction. Be the star lawyer at 30 and the managing partner at 65.

Brooks lauds Bach as a role model. The famous composer was the master of Baroque music in his fluid years. When Baroque fell from favor and gave way to classical music, Bach shifted from composer to professor, dying a happy man who was surrounded by his adoring students.

Another key to late life satisfaction is to reduce your “wants.” Satisfaction equals “haves” divided by “wants.” The better path to happiness is to reduce your “wants” (the denominator) rather than increase your “haves” (the numerator). Brooks contrasts Western civilization (where we treat life as an empty canvas on which we keep adding and adding paint) vs. Eastern civilization (where an intricate jade sculpture starts as a big block of jade, and the more you chip away, the more beautiful it becomes). Be a jade sculpture rather than a blank canvas. As we age, subtract rather than add.

In his article, Brooks also offers these tips:

  • Don’t smoke.
  • Watch your drinking.
  • Maintain a healthy body weight.
  • Prioritize movement.
  • Practice coping mechanisms.
  • Keep learning.
  • Cultivate long-term relationships.

All of this is common sense, but the science actually proves it. Following these tips improves the odds of a life that is not only 7 ½ years longer, but also more enriching.

Marvin and Laurie Blum with his mother Elsie Blum, now 94 and a role model for improved longevity.

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Add 7 ½ Years to Your Life

Want to add 7 ½ years to your life—and not just more years, but fulfilling ones? There’s actually science that tells you how. At a recent TIGER 21 conference, Chip Conley (CEO of Modern Elder Academy) was a wealth of information.

Exercise and stopping smoking both help, but research from Dr. Becca Levy at Yale reveals a tool that’s more than twice as powerful as those two combined—a positive mindset. The result is 7 ½ more years of life. Easier said than done, but Conley offers tips.

  • Become a beginner at something. If you’re no longer a beginner, you’re no longer learning. Ask yourself: “Ten years from now, what will you regret if you don’t learn it or do it now?” Jane Fonda (age 87) suggests art lessons. A National Endowment for the Arts study showed art classes improve mental engagement and physical activity, resulting in fewer doctor visits and making you less likely to fall. As a painter myself, I draw inspiration from other elder artists like George W. Bush, Bob Schieffer, and the late Winston Churchill.
  • Stay curious. Conley defines a “Modern Elder” as one who is as curious as he is wise. You can stimulate that curiosity at a Modern Elder Academy mid-life workshop “to fuel your gas tank for the later years.”
  • Cultivate “social wellness.” Join a community to exercise, paint, or volunteer. Also reconnect with friends from the past. Conley challenged us to take out your phone and text someone from long ago. I texted Jim Lipstate, my best friend from our freshman UT year. He responded instantly, and we’re back in touch after decades of living separate lives. I suggest you try it now.
  • Realize that our most valuable asset is time—edit out negativity in your life. In life’s later stages, it’s time to stop adding to our resume and start subtracting things that suck more juice than add.
  • Laugh at yourself. When laughing, it keeps us from being too self-critical.

Following these tips will improve our ability to handle life’s transitions, so we can go from “caterpillar” (the prior chapter’s ending stage) through “chrysalis” (the “messy middle”) and emerge a “butterfly” (the new beginning). It also helps us to find meaning, equipping us to solve a mystery posed by Mark Twain: The two most important days are the day you were born and the day you figure out why you were born. Solving that will help us live not only 7 ½ years longer, but also live those 7 ½ years with more purpose.

Marvin and Laurie Blum at a TIGER 21 conference, learning the tools to achieve longevity and putting them into practice.

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What’s in a Name? A Lot! (Especially When the Name is Juliet Georgie)

There is a Jewish tradition to name a child after a deceased loved one. Naming someone for an ancestor helps carry on the departed’s soul and memories “l’dor vador,” from generation to generation. Typically, the Hebrew name is the same as the loved one’s, and the English name is similar. When our daughter Lizzy Savetsky was expecting her second child (a daughter) she approached us about naming her after my deceased father Julius George Blum (Yehuda Getzel in Hebrew), as no one had been named for him yet. Rather than saving the name for a son they might never have, they wanted to go ahead and honor my dad. At the first Torah service following the birth, Ira declared his daughter’s name as Juliet Georgie (Yehudit Gital in Hebrew). Yehudit stands for the women of Judea, whereas Yehuda represented the men. I stood by proudly, filled with memories of her namesake.

A couple of weeks ago, each child in Juliet’s grade did a presentation on a deceased ancestor, featuring a meaningful artifact from that person. For her L’dor Vador project, Juliet Georgie chose to honor my father Julius George, highlighting the symbolism of his gold Rolex watch. It’s a proud and significant moment for me that I’d like to share with you.

I’ve written several times in this Family Legacy Planning blog about the importance of preserving family heritage. Research actually shows that the more we know of our ancestors, the higher our self-esteem. Knowledge of a family’s past (particularly stories overcoming struggles) arms us with resilience when adversity strikes. We know we come from stock who handled even worse things and survived, even thrived. I applaud Juliet’s school (SAR Jewish Day School in Riverdale, New York) for supporting this effort.

The irony is that Julius Blum was seemingly a very simple man. It didn’t dawn on me until after he was gone how special and significant he was. He was a hardworking, humble, and unassuming leader. Never once did I hear him brag about anything. Then, going through his papers, I discovered all kinds of youth, college, and adult leadership roles in the Jewish community. Those activities were overshadowed by his heavy work schedule. As Juliet so eloquently describes in her project (see photo attached), Julius was relentlessly committed to earning a living to provide his family with all the advantages he never had. On top of that, he never complained—not once!

Juliet chose his Rolex watch as a symbol of Julius’ success. “The watch was one of the few nice things my great-grandfather ever bought for himself. It was his way of saying he had made it.” He wore it quietly and proudly, as a reward for all his hard work, and never as a means of showing off. Juliet is taking an important lesson from that heirloom watch. To her, the watch symbolizes the importance of having a strong work ethic and taking care of your family. 

Juliet mentioned Julius’ love of bowling. He was in two bowling leagues: the Jolly Clowns on Wednesday nights, and a B’nai Brith Men’s League on Sunday mornings. At the end of each season, there was a trophy ceremony. Every year, Julius brought home a trophy from both bowling leagues engraved “Sportsmanship Award.”  I asked what that meant and he kind of blew it off as a “no big deal” thing. Well, now I know it was a very big deal. Everyone voted for him as the best sport, the nicest competitor, sort of a Mr. Congeniality. That says a lot about Julius Blum.

He loved to take care of our kids Adam and Lizzy. Julius was playful. He arrived at our house with a Big Chief writing tablet and a big fat (easy to hold) pencil to teach them to write their letters. He sat them on the bottom step and asked math problems, and every time they got one right, they got to advance up a step. On Saturday mornings he’d take Lizzy in his pickup truck to the Ol’ South Pancake House for salami & eggs, chocolate milk, and a tummy ache. Then on many of those Saturday nights, Lizzy would go with my parents to the Fort Worth Symphony where Julius bought her a bag of cherry sours to devour through the concert (and yet another tummy ache, but well worth it!). 

I remember when he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer at age 76. He looked at the doctor and us and said, “I’ve had 76 wonderful years. Who could ask for more?” Adam was a college freshman, and I remember Julius saying, “Don’t let my illness interfere in any way with you having the best college experience. Go back to Austin, enjoy yourself, and make the most of it.” Throughout my dad’s final year fighting that dreadful cancer, he still never complained. What a role model of strength and positivity. I cling to all these memories now.

Juliet Georgie (Yehudit Gital), indeed you come from good stock. Julius George (Yehuda Getzel) is watching over you.

Marvin Blum’s granddaughter Juliet Georgie Savetsky proudly displaying her great grandfather’s gold watch as a symbol of the heritage he left to her.

Juliet’s L’dor Vador project honoring her namesake, Julius George Blum
Julius George Blum with his adoring granddaughter Lizzy, who grew up to become the mother of Juliet Georgie (as well as Stella and Ollie) Savetsky.

What’s in a Name? A Lot! (Especially When the Name is Juliet Georgie) Read More »

Save Income Tax (and Actually Have Fun Learning How!)

I recently had the challenge of being lunchtime speaker in Lubbock on “Creative Income Tax Strategies.” The speech was to the South Plains Trust and Estate Council. I knew I couldn’t hold their attention by reciting a bunch of tax code sections and technical concepts. Solution? Turn each technique into a catchy story and keep them laughing. With my law partner John Hunter’s help in creating the stories, I pulled it off. No one was drifting asleep. Success!

My typical speech topics are about ways to save estate tax. Estate planners are so good at that, to the point some dub the estate tax a “voluntary tax” (paid by those who volunteer not to plan). I live in the world of “squeeze and freeze” transfers to DGTs, SLATs, and 678 Trusts. But in this speech, I shifted gears to saving income tax. The audience was all ears.

I understand why. As much as people want their family to avoid paying a 40% estate tax when the inheritance comes their way, people get even more excited about saving income tax—now, today, while they’re alive.

One way for people to save income tax is to own appreciated assets and get a stepped-up basis on them when they die. But once again, people prefer to save income tax without having to die. My speech revealed 10 ways to save income tax without having to die.

Some of these tools may sound “too good to be true.” That’s not the test under the law. Bottom line—if the law allows it, you can do it, regardless how it smells. Don’t take my word for it. The Fifth Circuit famously said it doesn’t use its “olfactory senses” in deciding tax cases. Furthermore, here’s the word from the esteemed Judge Learned Hand in Gregory v. Helvering (2nd Circuit Court of Appeals 1934): “Anyone may arrange his affairs so that his taxes shall be as low as possible; he is not bound to choose that pattern which best pays the treasury. There is not even a patriotic duty to increase one’s taxes. Over and over again the Courts have said that there is nothing sinister in so arranging affairs as to keep taxes as low as possible. Everyone does it, rich and poor alike and all do right, for nobody owes any public duty to pay more than the law demands.”

You can click on this link to read my 10 stories in my PowerPoint on “Creative Income Tax Strategies.” Here’s a brief overview:

  • Overfund your Roth IRA. Transfer appreciating assets (like a carried interest in a private equity fund), to a Roth IRA and the permanent income tax avoidance will likely greatly exceed the temporary pain of excise taxes on the overfunded amount.
  • Section 1202 Qualified Small Business Stock. Almost any business owner (other than service businesses or oil and gas, including those who think they don’t qualify under Section 1202) can restructure their business and end up avoiding tax on gains ranging between $10 million and $500 million.
  • Private Placement Life Insurance (“PPLI”). Income earned on investments inside a PPLI can escape income tax forever.
  • Mixing Bowl Partnerships. Transfer high basis assets to a partnership, along with low basis assets (like a building), and achieve a “basis swap,” ending up with a high basis on the building that you can later sell or depreciate.
  • Installment Sales. Sell assets to a related party (like an S Corporation or Trust) for a 25 year, interest-only note, who then sells it two years later for cash. Defer paying income tax on the gain for 23 years.
  • Upstream Planning. Give an elder relative or friend a general power of appointment over your low basis assets and get a free stepped-up basis on the assets when they die.
  • Basis Bump Swap. Swap out low basis assets in a grantor trust in exchange for high basis assets of equal value, and get a step-up when the grantor dies.
  • Conservation Easements. Impose an easement on land you love to preserve it as is, achieving a charitable deduction now and saving estate tax later.
  • Charitable Remainder Trust (“CRT”). Before selling a low basis asset, transfer it to a CRT and let the CRT sell it, deferring tax on the gain.
  • Qualified Opportunity Zone (“QOZ”) Funds. Within 180 days after incurring a gain, transfer proceeds to a QOZ and defer tax. Hold the QOZ for 10 years and never pay tax on the QOZ gain.

This is obviously a quick overview. Don’t engage in these 10 tools without careful tax counsel to guide you through the ins and outs. The Blum Firm would be honored to assist you in your planning.

Marvin Blum speaks on “Creative Income Tax Strategies” to South Plains Trust and Estate Council in Lubbock.

Marvin Blum (right) with legendary Texas Tech professor Gerry Beyer, who expertly trained many estate planning attorneys at The Blum Firm.

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How to Raise Happy Kids

This post wraps up a four-part series on parenting tips. Last week’s post was How to Raise Entrepreneurial Kids. Today’s shifts focus to How to Raise Happy Kids. I’m not an expert on the topic, but just sharing things I’ve learned from those who are. In particular, I’m an avid fan of Arthur Brooks who teaches “Happiness” at Harvard. Today’s tips come from Brooks’ January 27, 2025, weekly column on “The Art and Science of Happiness,” as well as a speech he gave two days later at a TIGER 21 conference.

Brooks gives us hope. Even if we’re not perfect (and who is?), we can succeed at raising happy kids. Here’s how:

  • The science says that one-third of the job is to just be warm and loving. Warmth and affection from fathers gets even more weight.
  • Kids raised in faith fare better. A 2001 study shows the benefits of “parental religiosity.” Once again, a father practicing his faith carries even more weight than a mother.
  • Put the focus on being “happy” rather than “special.” Kids who grow up striving for fame or power struggle with happiness later. The brain gets wired to only be happy when you get the adulation of strangers, often leading to addiction. Per Brooks, the worst thing is for your kid to be a child Disney star.
  • Live a life with purpose. Engage in meaningful family activities.
  • Create a tight family unit. Thousands of aspen trees in a grove all share one root system. Happy people realize their individuality is an illusion. Don’t go it alone. We are all connected.
  • Most of all, “be the person you want your kids to become.” “What you say has very little impact on how kids turn out…. What does matter for their development and well-being as a parent is your behavior—what they see you doing.”

Brooks clarifies that happiness is different from joy. Joy is just evidence of happiness. Joy is the smell of the Thanksgiving turkey; happiness is enjoying the whole meal. Brooks identifies the four daily habits of the happiest people:

  • Faith– Be “little” in an enormous universe.
  • Family– Your true self is not the sum of your achievements, but the sum of the love for the people in your life.
  • Friends– Friends aren’t a “nice to have,” they’re a “need to have”—but you need “real friends,” not “deal friends” who only befriend you because you can benefit them.
  •  Meaning– Engage in daily activity that gives you purpose—a reason to get out of bed in the morning. 

Reflecting on this, I want to give a shout out to the way my daughter and her husband, Lizzy and Ira Savetsky, are raising Stella (12), Juliet (10), and Ollie (4). It brings Laurie and me great joy that they are checking all Brooks’ boxes, and the results are living proof of it. In particular, Lizzy describes their activism for the Jewish people as a “family business” that employs all five of them. Their kids are involved almost daily supporting Israel—putting up posters of hostages so the world won’t forget, meeting with family members of hostages to give love, visiting hospitals and army bases, serving meals, attending rallies and prayer vigils. Stella even asked for no Bat Mitzvah presents, preferring donations to “IDF Widows and Orphans” (Israel Defense Forces Widows and Orphans).

Brooks sums up the goal: may they grow up to be “good, responsible, compassionate, honest, faithful—and happy—people.” And to that I say, Amen!

Marvin and Laurie Blum with Harvard Professor Arthur Brooks, a leading authority on how to raise happy kids.

Second, Third, and Fourth Photos: Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky, her husband Ira, and kids Stella, Juliet, and Ollie are role models for living with purpose.

How to Raise Happy Kids Read More »

How To Raise Entrepreneurial Kids

As an estate planning lawyer, I represent a lot of entrepreneurs. Most of them are first generation wealth creators who grew up in modest circumstances. Family advisor Tom Rogerson of GenLegCo. teaches that a modest upbringing provides the conditions to create an “entrepreneurial incubator.” When trying to make ends meet with limited resources, family members not only learn to stretch the dollar, they also become naturally inter-dependent and learn to work together with others. Those skills come in handy in growing a business.

Many first generation (“G-1”) business creators hope G-2 will follow suit, exhibiting the drive to likewise grow into an entrepreneur. Here’s the dilemma. Many of the G-2’s grow up in very different circumstances than G-1. They lack exposure to the struggle that generated G-1’s grit. Rogerson refers to this rise in resources as fostering family independence (as opposed to inter-dependence), creating an “entrepreneurial kill-zone.” Click here for more on this topic in my April 26, 2022 post, “Declaration of INTER-dependence.”

Rogerson illustrates this concept on a graph. The lower left corner, where wealth is low and family interdependence is high, is the “Entrepreneurial Incubator.” As you move to the right (where wealth is higher) and upward (from interdependence to independence), you hit the “Entrepreneurial Kill Zone.” Families in the “kill zone” lose training on how to interact and make decisions as a team, which is a detriment if you are starting and running a business.

My last two posts were devoted to parenting.  I described it as the hardest and most important job you’ll ever have. Today, let’s explore what can entrepreneurial parents do to improve the odds of raising entrepreneurial kids?

Family Business magazine addressed this topic in “The Entrepreneur Gene” (Sept. 16, 2024). Entrepreneurs grow up with “an appetite for risk and perseverance through adversity.” But as the business grows and focus shifts to an “emphasis on continuity and legacy preservation, it’s easy to become risk-averse—and that mentality can hinder innovation and evolution.” The next gen’s stewardship of the business is healthy, “but there’s a flipside.” “A fear of failure” can inhibit creative thinking, per Prof. Alisa Jno-Charles of Babson College. A child who is afraid to fail will have challenges growing a business. What can parents do?

Jno-Charles offers a solution. The key is to develop “a very trusting and open familial culture, where children feel like they can come to their parents with anything.” Babson professor Angela Randolph expands this concept: “the key for parents hoping to foster entrepreneurship is turning NextGen’s mistakes into teachable moments. After all, entrepreneurs must be able not only to accept failure, but also to take lessons from it.”

Randolph elaborates that parents can best create an entrepreneurial mindset in two ways: “1) they actively share their goals, values and aspirations with their children and 2) they lead by example.” As I quoted Warren Buffett last week: “Your children are watching you more than they are listening to you.”

I’ll conclude with a powerful example from a family meeting I facilitated. The entrepreneurial patriarch suggested that at the next meeting he would review his many success stories on how he built an empire. The kids had a different agenda in mind. They asked their dad to instead describe the times he failed and what he learned from those failures. At the next family meeting, the kids were all ears. That was the best lesson in entrepreneurship he could ever give.

Marvin and Laurie Blum with Tom Rogerson of GenLegCo., advocating the importance of family INTER-dependence in order to raise entrepreneurial kids.

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Parenting: Part Two

In last week’s post, I discussed the job of parenting, the hardest and most important job we ever do. The feedback I received was super affirming. Every parent can relate to the challenges. In my mission to help families create a lasting legacy, it starts with our job as parents to try to raise responsible kids. I’m no parenting expert, but I’ll take a stab at sharing some more wisdom on this topic.

Our job starts when our kids are born. I’ll never forget what I learned from the esteemed Rabbi Haskell Lookstein at Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun in New York. We were attending a Simchat Bat ceremony to celebrate the birth of a friend’s daughter. Rabbi Lookstein admonished the new parents: “Your first job as parents is to teach your child to have gratitude.” He explained that a newborn quickly becomes accustomed to having everything given to them. Naturally, a kid can grow up expecting that free ride to continue. According to the Rabbi, the first task is to teach little ones to say, “thank you.” For starters, it’s as simple as that. As they get older, our job expands.

Legendary Fort Worth vice principal at I.M. Terrell High School, Hazel Harvey Peace, embraced this message when she accepted Fort Worth’s Multicultural Alliance Award. In her speech, she told of high school students who were about to make bad decisions. She asserted that sometimes kids aren’t ready to make certain decisions. She said it is our job as parents (and hers, as their vice principal) to step in and override them. As I said last week, parenting isn’t a popularity contest. The mission is to keep them on track until they have the maturity to make critical decisions. Let kids learn lessons of failure on small decisions, but protect them from major screw-ups until they’re old enough to make responsible decisions.

With Adam and Lizzy both now grown, Laurie and I breathe a sigh of relief. We gave it our all and did our best. We certainly weren’t perfect. Interestingly, Lizzy was interviewed for an article about her life story. Lizzy described my role as the dad who relentlessly pushed her to reach her full potential, and Laurie’s role as the strict disciplinarian pushing her to behave. The author portrayed our parenting approach in a negative light. Our friends were horrified by the negative depiction of our parenting style. Laurie and I were unfazed. In fact, we wear that description as a badge of honor. We’ll take that criticism any day.

I once had the privilege of asking Warren Buffett for his advice on raising responsible kids, especially kids raised in affluence. He instantly responded that the most effective way to parent is to set an example. As Buffett said, “Your kids are watching you more than they are listening to you.”

I see this playing out beautifully in the next generation of our family. At an “End Jew Hatred” event, Lizzy was asked for one piece of advice. Her answer was golden: “I want to talk to all the moms and dads in the audience. It’s our job to raise our kids to care. People ask how I got my kids to be invested in supporting the Jewish people. It’s action. They’re watching everything we do. It’s what we eat, sleep, and breathe in our house. They know this is who they are, and they know what’s expected of them.” It’s the “Savetsky Family Business,” and they grow up knowing they’re a part of it.

That was a mountaintop moment for me as a G-1 parent, to witness my G-2 daughter passing down our family’s values to G-3, l’dor vador, from generation to generation. Lizzy concluded: “As parents, we must prepare the next generation. We need them to be educated. We need them to feel empowered. We need them to be ready to take the reins, carry the torch, and light the way.”

Way to go, Lizzy. And as for Laurie and me, mission accomplished!

Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky speaking at an End Jew Hatred event about the importance of parents passing down their values to their kids.

Parenting: Part Two Read More »

The Hardest Job You’ll Ever Have

For most jobs we do in the course of life, we go through some kind of training. Typically, there’s an orientation or at least a “how to” manual. But for one job (the most important of all), there is no schooling or instruction book. You’re thrown into the deep and it’s sink or swim. You’ve likely guessed by now—that job is raising kids.

Parenting is hard. You love with all your heart, but you’re not there to win a popularity contest or be best friends. I can think of lots of times I wasn’t the most popular or “coolest dad” to Adam and Lizzy. A couple of examples come to mind:

  • Lizzy discovered a love of performing in her second grade performance of “I’m Just a Girl Who Can’t Say No.” From that point, she wanted a career on stage, in the spotlight. I knew a relentless pursuit of performance would interfere with her Hebrew studies. I struck a bargain with her: “If you wait until after your Bat Mitzvah and devote yourself fully to your religious preparation, I’ll take you to every audition after that and support your dream.” Lizzy complied, and at age 13, only weeks after her Bat Mitzvah, I stood in a long line with her auditioning at the Johnnie High Country Music Revue (not exactly a Jewish hang out). The rest is history. Lizzy performed weekly on that stage for years, a great training ground for her career as a public speaker and advocate for all things Jewish and Israel. Remarkably, she ended up combining her love for the spotlight and her love for Judaism. 
  • When Adam was in his senior year as a business honors and accounting major at UT, he informed me of his decision not to take the CPA exam. He appreciated his accounting education but had no intention of ever practicing as a CPA. He already had a non-accounting job lined up on Wall Street and saw little value in spending his last semester studying for a test. My response: “Adam, you had the misfortune of being born into the wrong family. In the Blum family, taking the CPA exam is not optional.” Again, I wasn’t the popular dad. His answer: “It’s a waste.” Adam aced the exam, is still a CPA, and indeed never has practiced accounting. But he uses his accounting skills daily at his investment firm, and today Adam admits that his CPA designation has enhanced his credibility and has provided a meaningful benefit to him over the years as he’s built and grown his investment firm.

These stories bring to mind a similar time when my mom Elsie had to be the unpopular parent with me. In the summer leading up to my Bar Mitzvah, I was playing at a friend’s house and decided that was more fun than learning to lead the Shacharit service at my Bar Mitzvah. I called my mom at work to inform her I would just do the Torah, Haftarah, and Musaf portions at my Bar Mitzvah and let the Cantor lead Shacharit. Elsie wasn’t having it. To this day, at age 70, I think of Elsie’s insistence every time I recite Shacharit. I suppose I know the source of my own parental pushing. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

I share these thoughts to help other parents who struggle with the toughest job on earth. But it’s also the most important job we ever do. We are raising tomorrow’s leaders. The future of the world depends on us to do our job, starting in our kids’ earliest years. Raising responsible kids is also critical to building a legacy and positioning a family for multi-generational success. As we learn in Ethics of our Fathers: “Train up a child in the way he should go, and even when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Sometimes that means telling your kids what they don’t want to hear, and then holding the line if they object. That’s our job.

Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy with Johnnie High in her first singing appearance on his show—the start of life in the spotlight.

Marvin’s son Adam Blum graduating college with the CPA exam already behind him.
Marvin (age 13) at his Bar Mitzvah, ready to lead Sabbath services start to finish.

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A Personal Growth Journey to the Stars 

Last week’s post told how our morning walking buddies, Barbara and Thurman Schweitzer, provided the inspiration for 2025 New Year’s Resolutions for me and for The Blum Firm. I shared how creating a mental “vision board” can help actualize your dreams.

In addition to last week’s wisdom from The Answer, the Schweitzers had another powerful recommendation: The Wealth Money Can’t Buy, by Robin Sharma. The title instantly resonated with my quest to promote the “heart” side of estate planning, along with the “head” side. It reminds me of my mentor James Hughes’ book Family Wealth: Keeping it in the Family. Hughes opens by saying that when he uses the word “it” in the title, he doesn’t mean money. Per Hughes, financial capital is only one of five capitals, outnumbered by human, social, intellectual, and spiritual capitals. 

Similarly, in Sharma’s list, “Money is only one of eight forms of wealth, overshadowed by Growth, Wellness, Family, Craft (or your Work), Community, Adventure, and Service.” In my goal to inspire The Blum Firm, I chose to focus on Sharma’s first source of wealth: Growth. My goal was to inspire each member of our team to strive for personal growth.

In explaining Sharma’s book, Barbara taught me that “humans are happiest and genuinely wealthiest when we are steadily realizing our personal gifts and primal talents. The regular pursuit of personal growth is one of your most valuable assets.”

Sharma’s book offers a treasure of tips to achieve personal growth. I selected these few to share with my team:

  • “The most important investment you can make is in yourself,” by my hero Warren Buffett.
  • “Small, daily, seemingly insignificant improvements, when done consistently over time, lead to stunning results.”
  • “All change is hard at first, messy in the middle, and gorgeous at the end.” [That one really strikes a chord, as many of us are naturally resistant to change (what we call the “C” word at The Blum Firm).]
  • “The way to start, is to start.” Just start and do so now.

When each of us embarks on a journey to achieve our full potential, imagine the outcome of the collective effort. The sky is the limit. Let’s reach for the stars.

This isn’t to say there won’t be meteors to dodge on our rocket ship ride to the heavens. My kids are fortunate graduates of Fort Worth’s Trinity Valley School, where the motto is, “Per Aspera, Ad Astra,” – “Through difficulty, to the stars.” By making the most of our gifts and talents, we empower ourselves to overcome obstacles and keep reaching for the stars. Here’s to the exciting personal growth journey ahead and all the possibilities it offers!

Marvin and Laurie Blum’s morning walks with Thurman and Barbara Schweitzer are a meaningful source of inspiration.

A Personal Growth Journey to the Stars  Read More »

What’s On Your Vision Board for 2025?

As we wrap up the month for New Year’s Resolutions, I’m looking into my crystal ball to envision a meaningful and productive year, both for me personally and for The Blum Firm. In seeking inspiration for those resolutions, I found it on an early morning walk.

Laurie and I roll out of bed early (the older we get, the earlier that is). Our day starts with exercise. As Laurie advises, “move your body at least an hour a day.” On frequent mornings, we walk the hills in our neighborhood, often linking up with another couple. That couple has become good friends of ours, a fringe benefit of our workout routine. As it turns out, our walking buddies, Barbara and Thurman Schweitzer, provided that source of inspiration.

The Schweitzers are big-time students of motivational books to help inspire their team at Sotheby’s Reality. When I asked for their input, they were a treasure trove of ideas. 

Barbara was reading The Answer by John Assaraf and Murray Smith. As I was asking The Blum Firm to also look into a crystal ball and idealize the firm’s future, Assaraf and Smith offered great advice: When visioning the future as you’d like it to be, figure out what that looks like and get that into your mind. Doing so will automatically train your subconscious mind to take steps to make that vision happen.

The Answer tells how Assaraf grew up in modest circumstances, always wanting to live in a grand house. Assaraf gathered photos from Architectural Digest and created a “vision board.” Fast forward 15 years and Assaraf’s son saw that vision board and declared to his dad,” That’s our house now!” Without realizing it, Assaraf had actualized his vision. That only happened because he had planted that vision in his subconscious mind.

As our team embarked on an exercise to dream big, I asked everyone to close their eyes and envision the ideal Blum Firm of the future. In your mind’s eye, create a vision board with those images. I learned from Assaraf (actually, from Barbara), that’s the first critical step to manifesting your dreams.

When I help facilitate family meetings, I use this same crystal ball exercise. I ask the family to look into that ball and imagine how you want your family to be 25 years in the future. We then discuss steps to take to help you get there. But even without taking intentional steps, just creating that mental vision board will subconsciously help make it happen.

Thanks to the Schweitzers for this valuable lesson we can all use in our families and businesses. Next week, I’ll share round two of their wisdom. Here’s to activating our creative juices and generating some lofty vision boards!

Wishing all a meaningful and productive 2025!

What’s On Your Vision Board for 2025? Read More »

Trump’s Back—Now What?

In last week’s post, I made a plea for unity as the inauguration approached. The inauguration happened yesterday, the country is still surviving, now what? As a tax lawyer, the question I get most about Trump is, what tax legislation can we expect?

We’ve been here before. Let’s wind the clock back eight years to 2017, the last time we had a “triple R” government (Republican Senate, House, and White House). Like now, tax reform was on the priority list. By the end of 2017, we had the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act (often called the “Trump Tax Act”) that became effective on January 1, 2018. What can we learn from the 2017 Tax Act experience?

First, tax legislation is complicated. Last time, it took all year to make it happen, passing in December 2017. I expect the same this time, although Trump is trying to package up everything in one “big, beautiful bill.” There are legislative priorities (such as border security, energy, and increasing the defense budget) that will be easier to push through—expect them to go first. Even Senate Majority Leader John Thune expects tax legislation to lag until later in the year.

Second, the 2017 Trump Tax Act barely passed, receiving only 51 aye votes in the Senate. Unsurprisingly, not one was a Democrat. With razor thin Republican majorities in the House and Senate, I expect the same this time. If the tax legislation passes, it will likely pass very narrowly, without one Democrat vote.

Third, due to filibuster, it generally takes 60 votes in the Senate to pass legislation. To pass with only 51 votes, tax cuts have to be part of the budget reconciliation process. Here’s the rub. Reconciliation prohibits tax cuts that extend beyond a budget window (typically 10 years), unless the cuts are “paid for” with new revenue or spending cuts. That’s why most of Trump’s 2017 tax cuts had an expiration date at the end of this year. Expect the same this time around—tax cuts with an expiration date.

If these 2017 tax cuts expire next New Year’s Day here’s what will happen:

  • The top individual tax rate will increase from 37% to 39.6%
  • The estate tax exemption will cut in half from about $14 million to about $7 million
  • The Pease cut-back returns, causing high-income taxpayers to lose part of their itemized deductions
  • Passthrough businesses and sole proprietors will lose the 20% deduction of their qualified business income (“QBI”).

This leads to the big question on so many minds: with the Republican trifecta, will those cuts actually expire this year or will the sunset date be extended? And if extended, for how long?

We are painfully aware of the mounting federal debt, now at $36 trillion. Just extending the 2017 tax cuts adds $4.6 trillion to the deficit over 10 years. Additional proposed tax breaks would add considerably more (such as eliminating tax on tips, overtime pay, and social security, cutting the corporate income tax rate to 15%, and lifting the $10,000 “SALT” cap for state and local taxes). As the budget bargaining begins, don’t be surprised if the extension of tax cuts is far less than 10 years (some suggest a window of two to five years). Some Republicans will be concerned about the cost, and agreeing on “pay fors” will be a heavy lift in this Congress.

While we watch them duke it out, here’s a word to the wise: the day will come when these tax breaks (such as a doubled $14 million estate tax exemption) will go away. When the pendulum swings, “squeeze and freeze” transfers to Grantor Trusts will also likely go away. But as we’ve seen in prior legislative proposals, when that day of reckoning comes, those who already did squeeze and freeze planning will almost assuredly be grandfathered.

Even if there is an extension of the sunset, now is the ideal time to take advantage of the “Golden Age” toolbox of opportunities available today. You can shift assets into entities and trusts that will “squeeze” down the current value of your estate, and then “freeze” your estate at that discounted value. With careful planning, you can do this and still retain access, control and flexibility.

By acting now, you not only lock in the benefit of today’s tax cuts, you also immediately begin shifting future growth out of your estate. Waiting is costly and risky. As my TIGER 21 chair Jack Mueller wisely says, “The greatest return we can get from anything we do is estate planning.” You won’t regret it. In fact, years from now, your family and you will be giving you a big pat on the back.

With Trump back in office, Marvin Blum ponders what tax legislation will pass, and the impact it will have on the Internal Revenue Code.

Trump’s Back—Now What? Read More »

Don’t Let Politics Ruin Relationships: It’s Not Worth It. 

As we approach the inauguration, so many of us are on edge, grappling with our country’s polarization and tense political environment. We are tempted to team up with others who are like-minded, while we shut out those who aren’t. Even within our own friend groups, we bond with those who closely share our views and may shun those who don’t.

I am thankful to be a part of the Canoe Brothers, a group of 21 buddies from law school. We travel together frequently, canoe trips and other excursions, and we share lively text discussions daily. Even in this tightly knit brotherhood, we are about 50/50 divided on political views. That’s a recipe for friction.

However, soon after the election, Canoe Brother Pete Geren provided us with very insightful wisdom. Pete’s words fueled within our group a commitment to stay unified, in spite of our political differences. How did he do that? Pete urged us to stand in the other person’s shoes and understand where they are coming from. Their perspective may differ from yours, but that doesn’t make either right or wrong.

Doing so isn’t easy, but the effort is worth it. As my daughter Lizzy Savetsky posted on her Instagram account after the election:

“Many of us have strong issues we’re fighting for on both sides that we genuinely believe are life and death. To my friends, family members, mentors, and followers who voted differently than I did, I maintain love and respect for you. We can have healthy discussions and even arguments without writing each other off completely. We can hold space for each other’s fears and pains while still grappling with our own. No election should end relationships.”

I can never do justice to Pete’s words by paraphrasing them, so I’ll repeat them here:

“Neither party will grow beyond its base until it learns and takes to heart the truth that those on the other side are equally ‘good’ and equally worthy of respect. In trying to understand those with whom we disagree, we are quick to vilify, assign base motives, and look for personal shortcomings to explain away decisions inexplicable to us. And quick to disrespect, if not denigrate the benighted them who act as they do. For the most part, “we” are talking about people we don’t know, communities way outside our personal experiences, people who faced lives with choices very different from ours, equally intelligent but differently educated, equally self-interested and equally public-spirited, equally generous and equally venal, and with faith and cultural traditions beyond our experience. How much respect do they deserve? As much as we deserve. No more, no less.

Talmage [Boston] has taught us to look to our Presidents for wisdom. For that and so much more, including this conversation we are having, thank you, Talmage. I will close with Lincoln’s closing lines from his first inaugural. He spoke to a nation on the brink of war with itself.

‘We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory, stretching from every battle-field, and patriot grave, to every living heart and hearthstone, all over this broad land, will yet swell the chorus of the Union, when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature.’”

I took Pete’s words to heart and accepted them as a challenge. I pledged to work on having a better understanding of Canoe Brothers (and others) who see things differently than I do. Other brothers likewise accepted the challenge.

This pledge to see things through the other’s eyes and be open to their viewpoints is also important in creating a family legacy. We all know that family disagreements can lead to lasting feuds that destroy a family’s legacy. It’s not worth it.

I’ve written about this before. Click here to see my post of May 31, 2022, “Family Friction? Be Thankful for the Variety of Spices.”

Professor Adam Grant (U. Penn, Wharton School) concurs: “Great minds don’t think alike. They challenge each other to think differently….Diverging views introduce you to new answers.” As we embark on a new year and a new administration, let’s resolve to be open-minded and empathetic.

The Canoe Brothers, though outspoken in our lively conversations (some might call them debates), remain committed to staying unified. May we serve as role models for others to do the same.

Marvin Blum (front and center) enjoying a friendly Texas vs. Vanderbilt rivalry with fellow Canoe Brothers. Even with our divergent football and political viewpoints, we remain committed to staying unified.

Don’t Let Politics Ruin Relationships: It’s Not Worth It.  Read More »

Choose the Right Spouse: That’s What Friends Are For

Next week, Laurie and I will celebrate our 46th anniversary. When I was growing up, my mother Elsie repeatedly advised me: “The most important decision you make in your life is who you marry. If you get that right, you can handle anything that comes your way, and you’ll have a happy life.” I must’ve heard that from her 1,000 times. Evidently, I took that advice to heart. When I chose Laurie for my wife, boy did I get it right!

Laurie grew up in Memphis, Tennessee, but fortunately chose the University of Texas for college. As fate had it, she chose to live at Dobie, a new co-ed dorm where I was a Resident Advisor. We met on her first day. As the Beatles sang, “She was just 17, and you know what I mean…” But the romance didn’t happen so fast. Instead, we became good buddies, eating together with a group of friends every night. But then one Sunday night a couple of years later, I was eating out with a law school friend Paul, and he asked (as guys tend to do), “Who’s your idea of the perfect girl?” He answered first, and without hesitation, Paul said, “To me, the perfect girl is Laurie Kriger.” I was speechless. Duh! How could I have not seen that? I agreed 100%, but was too close to her to realize it. We were just friends. But I decided then and there to take it to the next level.

I returned to my apartment and called Laurie to ask her out on a date—not just one date, but two. “Are you free next Friday night and next Saturday night?” I never had any “game,” or knew how to play it cool with a girl. That Friday night, I told my roommate Talmage Boston not to come home till late, as I was going to have a serious conversation with Laurie and break the news to her that we were going to become more than just friends. I had the lights dim, and the setting just right for a romance to start on the spot. Well, I’m sure it’s no surprise to you that it didn’t go the way I planned. Laurie was shocked and nervous. There was no romance that night.

In the coming months, I backed off, or at least tried to. Laurie was dating another guy (super rich, by the way, and his last name was the same as a big jewelry store), but nothing would deter me. I knew what I wanted, and I wasn’t going to give up. I somehow had to win her over.

I saw a chance and I grabbed it. Right after my law school graduation and the Bar exam, I became aware that Laurie, her parents, and her sister Peggy were going to London for a vacation.  I decided a vacation to London was just what I needed before starting my job. I asked Talmage to join me, and being my best friend and knowing how much this meant to me, he agreed. So, the two of us (broke, but with borrowed money) “happened” to be in London at the same time as the Kriger family. Laurie’s parents took a liking to us. In particular, her dad, Abe, saw my potential, even if I didn’t have a jewelry store last name. Laurie’s parents gave Talmage and me their two tickets to go see the London Broadway show “Annie” with Laurie and Peggy. That’s when it happened – the ice finally melted. During the tender song “Something Was Missing,” sung by Daddy Warbucks, our hands clasped, and I could feel the magic happening. 

Within weeks, we were engaged and planning a wedding. There was no reason to wait. We’d been friends for five years and knew all there was to know about each other. So, on January 13, 1979, at Temple Israel in Memphis, we became Mr. and Mrs. Blum. Talmage stood right by me as we said our vows. He was a big part of how we made it to that wedding canopy, as there would have been no Marvin in London had Talmage not agreed to join me.

Talmage is a Presidential historian and was recently researching George Washington and his marriage to Martha. He sent me a page from Washington’s God (by Michael and Jana Novak) that describes how George “loved having Martha at his side, and they shared every aspect of each other’s lives…. They were soul mates.” George considered Martha “his dearest friend, who thought they were two in one soul.” Talmage said the image of “two people, one soul” made him think of Laurie and me.  He sent me a copy of the page where next to those words, Talmage had written “Marvin & Laurie” in the margin. Laurie and I are deeply touched by Talmage’s words.

When I selected the title of this post as “Choose the Right Spouse: That’s What Friends Are For,” I had in mind a double meaning. In Laurie becoming my wife, Talmage was an essential element in making it happen, as without him, there’d have been no London meltaway moment. That’s what friends do for each other. But there’s a second meaning. Very often, the right spouse may well be someone who is your friend. When choosing a spouse, don’t overlook your close friends. It may take some time to get both of you on the same page, but stick with it and the rewards will come. I can hear Dionne Warwick singing now: “In good times and bad times, I’ll be on your side forever more. That’s what friends are for.” For me, that’s Talmage, and that’s Laurie.

Marvin & Laurie Blum on their wedding day, January 13, 1979.

Marvin & Laurie Blum today, as they celebrate their 46th anniversary.

Choose the Right Spouse: That’s What Friends Are For Read More »

2024’s Top Moments: Mia’s Birth and Stella’s Bat Mitzvah Speech

In this New Year’s Eve post, I urge all to reflect on 2024. If your year was typical, it brought lots of downs and ups. We learn more from the downs. Let’s discover those lessons and incorporate them into our legacy. When we recover from failures, we can use those stories to teach our heirs resilience.  So, let’s not sweep disappointments under the rug. Let’s turn the downtimes into teachable moments and pass those lessons down to our heirs. I was once working with a family who was planning the agenda for a family meeting. The patriarch wanted to present a recap of his successes. Instead, his kids asked him to identify the failures and talk about how he overcame them.

As I look back on 2024, I faced up to some challenges that just go with living—health, family, work. Laurie was always right there with me, and I feel good about the way we recovered from each challenge. On the world stage, 2024 brought a dramatic rise in antisemitism and attacks on Israel. Rather than crumble, I joined forces with others to raise our voices and raise awareness. I am hopeful the future will somehow be better. The hardest thing we confronted in 2024 was losing Laurie’s sister Linda, totally unexpected. But two things happened that tempered our sadness. The first was that right around that time, our 6th grandchild Mia was born. It was a circle of life moment—one life ends, another begins. Mia’s birth brings us enormous joy.  

The second salve to soothe our loss was that two weeks before losing Linda, the whole family had gathered in St. Louis for a cousin’s Bar Mitzvah. We had a glorious time. I wrote about this in a post dated June 25, 2024, “Family Matters: Farewell, Dear Linda.” I spoke about it in the eulogy I gave at Linda’s funeral, urging everyone that when presented with an opportunity to gather with family—GO! You never know; it may be the last chance to all be together. 

Later in 2024, we took advantage of just such an opportunity to all be together again. Our whole family gathered in New York for our oldest grandchild Stella’s Bat Mitzvah.  The experience was rewarding on so many levels. It provided us with magical moments of family connection and lifetime memories. Our dear friend Karen Reisman summed it up so well. As a child, Karen’s mother Anne Cortell was miraculously saved from the Holocaust, though many family members weren’t so fortunate. The impact on Anne was profound, but it empowered her to always give these words of advice: “You HAVE TO celebrate the good times.” (Karen adds a corollary: “because the bad times happen for free.”) As Karen emphasizes, you HAVE TO go celebrate. It’s not optional.

Of the many Bat Mitzvah highlights, the greatest of all was Stella’s speech at Sabbath services. I’ve never been more proud or grateful. Stella stood in front of a packed synagogue and confidently delivered a moving speech. Both her words and her powerful delivery will ring in my memory bank forever.  Here is Stella’s Bat Mitzvah speech:

I want to talk to you about Zionism. To me it means that the Jewish people and the land of Israel are one. This not a modern idea, it’s a biblical one, as we read about in this week’s Torah portion, Lech Lecha. 

This week’s parsha is really special because it is literally the birth of Zionism. Hashem tells Avraham to leave his birthplace, his father’s home, and to follow Him to a new land. Without any hesitation, Avraham packs his bags and goes. Hashem brings Avraham to the land of Israel and promises, “I will make you into a great nation in this land.”

This, right here in this Parsha, is the beginning of the Jewish people AND our connection to the land of Israel!!!! We have been one nation bound to the land of Israel and G-d from the very beginning of our story!! 

Now, I want to get personal for a minute. I had always known my Jewish identity was number one thanks to my family, my school, and of course my AMAZING synagogue (love you guys!). 

But on October 7th, I was in Israel, getting ready for shul, when my baby brother ran out of our hotel room. I went to go get him, and as I was in the hallway, I heard someone next to me banging on their dad’s door, shouting, “Dad, dad! Hundreds of rockets were just launched into Israel!” The dad ran downstairs to tell the hotel, and I went back to tell my mom. She told me, “You’re fine, don’t worry,” but then, just a minute later, the sirens went off. I grabbed my baby brother and we ran downstairs to the bomb shelter.

In that moment, the whole world changed for me—and for every Jew. Suddenly Zionism—our connection to Israel— wasn’t just something I heard my parents talking about all the time anymore. It became real. I understood the Jewish people’s responsibility to protect the land of Israel and stand with our people all over the world, no matter what. 

I saw the hatred against us, I saw my brothers and sisters suffering, and I realized how important it is to protect our home. I also saw how so many people turned on the Jews all over the world.

But I also saw something else. I saw the bravery of our soldiers, risking their lives to defend Israel, and I saw people all over the world, like my mom, standing up for what they believe in—even when they’re getting hate and death threats. She keeps fighting for what’s right, and I’m so lucky to have her as my role model.

That experience made me see Zionism in a whole new way. It’s not just about believing in Israel and loving Israel—it’s about protecting it, caring for it, and standing up for it. And the same thing goes for the Jewish nation. It’s our job to defend our people whether it’s in the battlefield, online, or in the streets. 

If we don’t, who will? 

And now that I’m becoming a bat mitzvah, I realize that this responsibility is part of what it means to grow up as a Jewish woman. It means taking responsibility—not just following the mitzvot, but being there for our people and for Israel. 

After my experience in Israel on October 7th, I decided to choose IDF Widows and Orphans as my bat mitzvah project. The soldiers of the IDF are like the protectors of the promise made in Lech Lecha. When they give their lives for Israel, we have to take care of their families. This is how we stand together as Am Yisrael—the Jewish nation. 

I got to meet and spend time with the orphans over the summer and just a couple weeks ago. These kids lost their parents in the war. I can’t imagine how hard that must be. This organization has camps, special events, and a bar and bat mitzvah program for the kids my age so they can feel special and supported by all of us. 

I am so blessed that today on my bat mitzvah I have both my mom and dad here, but these kids don’t. So we have a duty to support them as the Jewish nation. Their parents sacrificed their lives for all of us. Meeting them, hugging them, getting to know them, and supporting these programs for them has left a huge mark on my heart. 

Lech Lecha is the story of how we became a people and how G-d gave us our homeland. All in one breath. Just like Avraham answered G-d’s call to journey to Israel, today I’m becoming a bat mitzvah and taking on the responsibility to care for Israel and our people. G-d promised us we would be a great nation. He promised us the land of Israel. But he never promised us it would be easy. So I know I have a big job to do now as a Jewish woman. 

I will always remember the sacrifices made to protect our land, from the time of Avraham until today, and make sure they are never forgotten. Today, as I enter adulthood, I commit myself to doing whatever I can for the Jewish nation and the land of Israel. May I always go where G-d leads me to serve my people and my homeland, just like Avraham.

 

[For any who are interested, the website for the Israel Defense Forces Widows and Orphans can be found by searching IDFWO Organization. I’m thrilled to report that Stella has raised about $30,000 toward her goal of $36,000. She told everyone to make donations rather than give her gifts. That’s the kind of kid she is. Laurie and I are overwhelmed with gratitude.]

 

Here’s wishing all of you many good lessons from 2024!

Marvin Blum’s 12-year-old granddaughter Stella Savetsky delivered a Bat Mitzvah speech we’ll cherish forever.

As her Bat Mitzvah begins, Stella (joined by her mother Lizzy and sister Juliet) carries on the tradition of our matriarchs in lighting Shabbat candles.
The Blum Family is grateful to all be together at Stella’s Bat Mitzvah party, with the newest addition Mia held in her mother Brooke’s arms. You HAVE TO celebrate the good times!

2024’s Top Moments: Mia’s Birth and Stella’s Bat Mitzvah Speech Read More »

The Miracle of Ollie

Tomorrow night begins the Jewish festival of Chanukah, a holiday of miracles. We celebrate the miraculous victory of the Maccabean revolt against the Greek forces, the miracle of one day’s supply of oil lasting eight days, and the miraculous rededication of the Holy Second Temple of Jerusalem. Even the letters on the dreidel spinning top stand for Nes Gadol Hayah Sham, “a great miracle happened there.”  The holiday season seems the perfect time to celebrate miracles.

Do you believe in miracles? As a very practical person, I confess to my skepticism. That is, until four years ago, when my grandson Ollie was born. His birth was a complete miracle. I’ll share the story of Oliver Strong Savetsky to offer hope to all families struggling with something (and who isn’t?). Ollie’s life proves that indeed, miracles can happen. Never give up hope.

Wind the clock back a few years. Our daughter Lizzy experienced three miscarriages in one calendar year. Two were ectopic and nearly claimed her life. Although deeply grateful for two healthy daughters, after a pause (and at her husband Ira’s urging), Lizzy mustered the courage to try once more. Her IVF treatment was a success—pregnant for the sixth time.

And then came a familiar crushing blow—the heartbreaking report of yet another miscarriage. The doctor was a religious man and preferred to wait to let nature take its course. Then came the day to terminate the pregnancy, but wait—a pre-procedure sonogram revealed a startling announcement: “There’s a heartbeat!” Lizzy broke into tears: “I had a feeling my baby was still alive.”

It wasn’t an easy pregnancy. A month before her due date, Lizzy went to the hospital and was sent home as a “false alarm.” Laurie joined her the next morning with the premonition she needed to be with her daughter. Their intuition was right. Lizzy’s water broke and there was blood everywhere. Lizzy believed she was losing the baby. She was too nervous to tell Laurie how to get to the hospital, so Lizzy jumped into the driver’s seat and drove them there herself. The doctor’s diagnosis was the life-threatening condition of placenta abruption. Miraculously, Lizzy delivered a premature baby boy minutes later. Ira made it there too, barely in time.

They chose the Hebrew name “Yisroel” (Hebrew for Israel). He was named for my deceased brother Irwin, whose Hebrew name was also Yisroel. The baby’s English name was Oliver Strong Savetsky, a nod to the little fellow’s survival strength.

Jewish law calls for circumcision on the eighth day, but little Oliver Strong was in NICU growing stronger, so we had to delay the Bris a few weeks. Ira, a plastic surgeon, circumcised his own son just as our forefather Abraham did his son Isaac. 

At the Bris, Ira arrived with a mysterious gift-wrapped box and told this story. A few years earlier, Lizzy went to Poland to tour the concentration camps. Her group made a stop at Rabbi Elimelech’s grave to pray. Rabbi Elimelech taught that when you pray for something, pray as if you have the faith it will absolutely happen. Lizzy left the grave and immediately called Ira back in New York. She told him to go buy a gender-neutral baby outfit. Ira thought this request was crazy, but he complied. Ira rushed to a kids store and told the clerk, “I need a newborn outfit. I don’t know the size or the gender. Just pick something and wrap it up.” That box sat in the top of Ira’s closet, and he hand carried it to Dallas when they moved over a year later. Ira had no idea what was actually in that box.

Ira then opened the mystery package in front of the Bris attendees. Inside that box was a little boy outfit for a preemie baby just Ollie’s size. We were all aghast … Lizzy’s prayer had been answered, not on her schedule, but on G-d’s. Rabbi Elimelech was right. By taking action to prove they believed, their dream manifested in a newborn son. 

Following Jewish tradition, they waited until Ollie’s third birthday for his first haircut. At the “Upsherin” ceremony we attended in Jerusalem, Lizzy told her son, “Oliver Strong, you are small and strong, just like Yisroel, the land of Israel, your Hebrew name. And like Israel, you have the faith and fight in you that it takes to survive. Israel is a miracle, and Ollie, you are a miracle.”

I now believe in miracles.

 

Grandfather Marvin Blum and father Ira Savetsky rejoicing in the miracle of Ollie’s birth at his Bris (circumcision ceremony).

Ira reveals the contents of a surprise package at the Bris.
Three years later, the family gathered in Jerusalem for Ollie’s “Upsherin” (first haircut) celebration.
Moments later, at the Holy Temple Wall, Ira praises G-d for the miracle of his son Ollie.

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There’s No Place Like Home

As I’ve often stressed in this Family Legacy Planning blog, it’s important to identify significant lifetime moments, preserve them in some tangible way, and then pass them down to future generations as part of our story. Looking back on 2024, one of my most memorable moments was falling in love with my hometown at an event called Discover Fort Worth. In my upcoming year-end post, I’ll reveal more of the 2024 highlights that moved me. But I’ll start close to home with this one. As Dorothy discovered in “The Wizard of Oz,” and as I discovered too: “There’s no place like home.”

I am honored to serve on the national board of TIGER 21, an international peer learning network. Each year, we feature a city in a “Discover” program, a 3-day deep-dive into a city where important things are happening. This year, the featured city (at my urging) was Fort Worth. When we announced it, the membership’s reaction (as you might expect) was WHY FORT WORTH? For most of our 1,500 members, Fort Worth wasn’t on their radar. The registrations were trickling in until I began a big promo push. They were shocked to learn that Fort Worth is the 12th largest city in the US, and the fastest growing city too. When we announced the schedule of events, attendance picked up. We ultimately sold out and had a waiting list. After the 3-day “discovery,” comments went from “Why Fort Worth?” to “How can I invest here?” and “I want to move here.”  Planning Discover Fort Worth and proudly showcasing my city was one of my top highlights of 2024. In fact, in TIGER 21’s 25-year history, Discover Fort Worth is the first event to score a perfect “5 out of 5” in the post-event member surveys.  

We had to limit the size to 40 attendees, not only for intimacy, but also because one of the events (a behind-the-scenes tour of the F-35 fighter plane production assembly) had a strict cap of 40. Those 40 came from about 20 different cities, mostly outside of Texas. Our host hotel was the exquisite Michelin-awarded Bowie House, a perfect reflection of Fort Worth’s “Cowboys & Culture” moniker. Our first venture out was for a taste of Old Mexico with a mariachi-serenaded opening dinner at Joe T. Garcia’s patio paradise, a favorite of US Presidents and even Sir Paul McCartney. Dessert followed at Hotel Drover (also Michelin rated) in Fort Worth’s Historic Stockyards, featuring an all-out tribute to our Western heritage (even down to the longhorn steer and a branding station). We had a learning session with the team who recently redeveloped the area, making the Fort Worth Stockyards into the 15th most visited destination in America.

Day 2 started with an education program at Sotheby’s Realty on Fort Worth’s blossoming real estate industry, followed by a tour of the Modern Art Museum. Just the building itself is an art treasure, designed by Tadao Ando and designated by Travel & Leisure magazine as one of the World’s Most Beautiful Art Museums, and named by Architectural Digest as the Best Designed Building in Texas.  After an outdoor lunch at Quince overlooking the Trinity River, we headed to a VIP tour at Lockheed Martin. There we discovered Fort Worth’s role in the international defense industry and our contribution to protecting the world.  We not only toured the F-35 assembly, but also flew an F-35 simulator and discovered why you want me to plan your estate but not pilot your fighter plane. It’s harder than it looks.

That evening featured dinner at one of only two homes in the world designed by I. M. Pei, architect of the Louvre Pyramid in Paris, JFK Library, and dozens of other contemporary masterpieces. Our hosts, John & Cami Goff, opened up in a fireside chat where I coaxed John to tell of his remarkable rise from modest beginnings to prominence in the world of real estate and investing. They also revealed Fort Worth’s rising role as a TV and film mecca, as the night before John gave the speech at the Texas Business Hall of Fame to induct Fort Worth’s Taylor Sheridan (creator of Yellowstone, 1883, Landman, and other acclaimed shows starring the likes of Kevin Costner, Jeff Bridges, Angelina Jolie, Billy Bob Thornton, and Demi Moore). The Goffs are also spearheading efforts to create the Texas A&M Research Campus in downtown Fort Worth. John’s enthusiasm was so contagious that one of the TIGER 21 members from Chicago raised his hand on-the-spot and donated $100,000 to the project.

Day 3 concluded with a trio of Fort Worth Power Women: Mayor Mattie Parker, Rose Bradshaw (President/CEO of North Texas Community Foundation), and Elaine Agather (Central Region Head of JP Morgan). Mayor Parker revealed that, out of all US cities, Fort Worth has the second highest percentage of young families. During her tenure, Fort Worth has been named the most pro-growth city in America and the Best City in Texas for starting a business. By the way, while I’m unashamedly bragging, Texas is the eighth largest economy in the world and was named the number one state for business in America. Elaine Agather explained that the economic growth in Texas started in the 1970s with the Bass group in Fort Worth, due to what she described as “the Richard Rainwater effect.” Rose Bradshaw and Cullum Clark (Director of the George W. Bush Institute) put the cherry on top by spotlighting Fort Worth’s philanthropic story as we rank among the top for private giving in the country. In explaining Fort Worth’s success, Clark gave these five reasons why Fort Worth succeeds as an “opportunity economy:”

 

  • We focus on education and innovation.
  • We are commerce friendly—a great place to do business.
  • We’re a great place to live and raise a family (affordable, but not super cheap).
  • We invest in social capital and build a strong sense of community.
  • We welcome newcomers to our city.

I’ve bragged about Fort Worth before (click here for my blog post of June 13, 2023 “I’m Fort Worth Proud!”). Forgive me for going overboard again today about my hometown, but Discover Fort Worth just left me bursting with pride. Even better, all those out-of-towners realize why we’ve earned the nickname of “The Unexpected City.” We’re proud to also be known as “Cowtown” and “Where the West Begins,” but as our group “discovered,” we’re a lot more than that. With only three days, we had to leave out a lot of local treasures, but the wheels in my head are already spinning to come back in two years for “Rediscover Fort Worth.” My only worry is that, in letting the secret out, we don’t want Fort Worth to change. But please come visit—I’m happy to be your personal tour guide!

Marvin & Laurie Blum kick off the 3-day Discover Fort Worth event on a longhorn steer at Hotel Drover. Hook ‘em Horns!

Fort Worth’s Modern Art Museum is an architectural and artistic treasure, as described to us by expert docent, Gail Granek (center).
The TIGER 21 group heading into a behind-the-scenes F-35 assembly tour at Lockheed Martin.
Marvin & Laurie Blum joined by John Goff (left), Cami Goff (right), and Michelle & Jay Young at an evening fireside chat with the Goffs.
Marvin Blum with Power Women (from left) Laurie Blum, Rose Bradshaw, & Elaine Agather.
Marvin Blum with Fort Worth’s premier “Power Woman,” Mayor Mattie Parker.

There’s No Place Like Home Read More »

Spotlight on Dyann McCully, Our Guardianship Guru

While attending a Texas Tech seminar on estate planning, the opening speaker greeted us with these words: “If you ever see Dyann McCully, you need to give her a big thank you.” The topic was a Texas legislative update. The speaker continued: “Dyann McCully spearheaded the charge on updating the Texas law on guardianships. Thanks to Dyann’s tireless efforts, the legislature has adopted major improvements to the guardianship laws.” Hearing these words, I swelled up with pride. Do I ever see Dyann McCully? Only every day—Dyann heads up our litigation team at The Blum firm and her office is just one down from mine.

I love the story of how Dyann and her colleagues joined The Blum Firm eight years ago, creating our trust and estates litigation section. I attended the monthly meeting of the Tarrant County Probate Bar Association and had the good fortune of randomly sitting next to Dyann at the lunch. Dyann shared an interest in moving her firm’s litigation team to a new law firm, and I was instantly interested. She and I spoke later that day and got the wheels turning. Within a few months, Dyann joined us, along with David Bakutis, Beth Hampton, Cindi Adler, and Mary Ellen McMahon. Since that time, we have added many more to the team. We are grateful to have a vibrant and busy group of fiduciary trial attorneys now at The Blum Firm who not only know where the courthouse is, but who know what to do when they get there. My late father-in-law Abe Kriger used to refer to them as “real lawyers,” and often asked me when we planned to add some “real lawyers” to our law firm. Abe would join me in being super proud of our litigation section.

Dyann is truly a rockstar in the world of guardianships, as well as all aspects of trust and estate controversy.  She is a frequent speaker at probate and guardianship seminars, recognized by all as the “go to” expert in her field. She also testifies frequently at the Texas legislature to address needed changes in the law.  Recently, the State Bar of Texas invited her to be the Course Director for the 2025 Advanced Elder Law and Advanced Guardianship Law Course. Also, the Texas Guardianship Association Public Affairs Committee just asked her to join the committee to help with guardianship legislation issues for the upcoming legislative session. In this role, she will review proposed guardianship-related legislation and engage with legislators on finding solutions for these matters.

The mission of the Texas Guardianship Association (TGA) is the following:

  • To educate involved professionals, consumers and the general public regarding guardianship and its alternatives.​
  • To promote the development of guardianship and alternative programs to serve and protect vulnerable individuals.
  • To advocate for development and implementation of effective public policy regarding guardianship and related issues that are consumer sensitive.

And as if that’s not enough, Dyann is also a certified mediator in guardianship mediation, making her part of one of the first groups of attorneys to be certified in guardianship mediations. She mediates in contested guardianships, probates, and estates.

Having a robust litigation section at The Blum Firm has been a major “win-win” for us. The estate planners are grateful for the opportunity to consult with litigators on sensitive planning matters. And vice versa, the litigators welcome the trust, estate, and tax expertise our planners can provide for their complex cases. 

It’s my honor to shine this spotlight on Dyann McCully and sing out praises to her, loud and strong. Way to go, Dyann!

 

Marvin Blum is proud to shine a spotlight on his partner Dyann McCully, a rockstar in the guardianship and fiduciary litigation world.

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Don’t You Dare Steal My Aggie Ring

I’ve written before of life lessons I learned from my dad, Julius Blum. A man of simple yet strong words, he taught more by example then by narrative. In a powerful episode involving my dad’s prized Aggie ring, I learned lessons of courage and conviction I’ll never forget.

Julius Blum grew up in modest circumstances, living behind his family’s small neighborhood grocery store. He was a graduate of the School of Hard Knocks. Remarkably, that wasn’t his only degree. My dad was the first in his family to attend college, graduating from “The Agricultural and Mechanical College of Texas” in 1949 with a degree in mechanical engineering. Julius was rightfully proud of that achievement.

The fact my dad even went to college was remarkable in and of itself. There were two factors that propelled him to College Station. The youngest of four children, Julius had an older brother Sol who had big college dreams for his baby brother. Sol worked day and night to care for his family, seeing to it that Julius could receive the education others in the family couldn’t. The second factor was the GI Bill, earned from my dad’s World War II service in the army. Julius was forever grateful to both his brother Sol and this great country for his education.

Julius was an exceptional student in all things technical—a math and engineering whiz. I never confronted a math homework problem he couldn’t help me solve. But when it came to English—not so much. But let’s give him a break. He was raised by immigrant parents whose only language in the house was Yiddish, so making it through college English and earning that degree was an even bigger deal. That’s why the symbol of his degree, the iconic Aggie ring, meant so much to him.

That brings me to my story. When the ring became too tight on his finger, he carried it with him everywhere he went on his keychain. One day, a little boy Marvin happily joined his daddy on a father-son outing to University Car Wash. We watched through the window as his car went swish-swish down the line of water and suds. Returning home, he removed his key from the ignition and instantly realized his Aggie ring was gone! On a chain with many keys, the ring divided his car key from his house key, so he noticed immediately.

We instantly got back in the car and drove to the car wash. I followed him as he marched with purpose into the manager’s office. Julius wasn’t leaving without that ring. I thought that was mighty bold of him and I had my doubts. I underestimated him.

The manager knew Julius meant business. He temporarily shut down the car wash and gathered every employee in his office. I’ll never forget the manager’s words, “I’m going to leave this room and close the door. And when I return that ring better be on my desk, or everyone here is fired.” We waited outside the door with the bossman. After a moment, we re-entered his office. Lo and behold the Aggie ring was on the manager’s desk. Everyone returned to work, and I returned home with my dad and with a lesson I will never forget:

When something is precious to you, you fearlessly fight for it.

One more thing: In addition to my dad’s strength of character and integrity, another testament to his solid priorities was being a good sport when Irwin and I chose UT for college instead of A&M. Love of family came first, even when tested by some lively Longhorn/Aggie football experiences together. I cherish the memories. I even felt some of my dad’s Aggie spirit in my Longhorn body at last weekend’s rivalry game. Gig ’em Aggies and Hook ’em Horns!

 

Marvin Blum’s father Julius was the first in his family to graduate college, as evidenced by his prized diploma.

Marvin Blum at Texas A&M’s Kyle Field, cheering for his Longhorns but channeling his father’s Gig ‘em Aggie pride!

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20 Questions for Your Thanksgiving Table Talk

By popular request, we are repeating the blog post from November 23, 2021.

Wishing all of you a meaningful and joyful Thanksgiving.

Here’s a suggestion for the conversation at your Thanksgiving table: use the time to discuss the “Do You Know?” scale. Arming your family with answers to these 20 questions reinforces family bonds and helps heirs become more resilient. This assertion is based on research by Dr. Marshall Duke and Dr. Robyn Fivush, psychologists on the faculty at Emory University, developers of the 20 question “Do You Know?” list.

This thesis was further tested and confirmed by Bruce Feiler, author of The Secrets of Happy Families. After years of research and interviews, Feiler arrived at this startling conclusion: “The more children knew about their family’s history, the stronger their sense of control over their lives, the higher their self-esteem and the more successfully they believed their families functioned. The ‘Do You Know?’ scale turned out to be the best single predictor of children’s emotional health and happiness.”

Enjoy a lively and thought-provoking table conversation with the help of these 20 questions:

  • Do you know how your parents met?
  • Do you know where your mother grew up?
  • Do you know where your father grew up?
  • Do you know where some of your grandparents grew up?
  • Do you know where some of your grandparents met?
  • Do you know where your parents were married?
  • Do you know what went on when you were being born?
  • Do you know the source of your name?
  • Do you know some things about what happened when your brothers or sisters were being born?
  • Do you know which person in the family you look most like?
  • Do you know which person in the family you act most like?
  • Do you know some of the illnesses and injuries that your parents experienced when they were younger?
  • Do you know some of the lessons that your parents learned from good or bad experiences?
  • Do you know some things that happened to your mom or dad when they were in school?
  • Do you know the national background of your family (such as English, German, Russian, Chinese, and so on)?
  • Do you know some of the jobs that your parents had when they were young?
  • Do you know some awards that your parents received when they were young?
  • Do you know the names of the schools that your mom went to?
  • Do you know the names of the schools that your dad went to?
  • Do you know about a relative whose face “froze” in a grumpy position because he or she did not smile enough?

The Blum Firm wishes you a meaningful Thanksgiving celebration with your loved ones.

From their home to yours, Marvin and Laurie Blum wish you a meaningful Thanksgiving.

20 Questions for Your Thanksgiving Table Talk Read More »

The Big Reveal: The Blum Firm’s Core Values

Do you, your family, or your business have a set of core values? What are they? And, more importantly, what do those values truly mean?

We recently held The Blum Firm’s Annual Meeting, where everyone comes together to review the past year, assess where we currently are, and dream about where we are going. The focal point of this year’s meeting was to identify our core values.

As the firm’s Human Resources Manager, Eric Evans, said, “Core values are a small set of vital and timeless guiding principles. They define culture and who we truly are as people.”

I have discussed this in previous blogs, but core values aren’t just company-based. In fact, the Blum Family’s core values are faith, family, hard work, and education. These values were born out of the experience of being raised by immigrants who came to America with nothing but their values. It was those four core values that enabled my grandparents to survive hardships and set our family on a course to achieve the American Dream.

But you may wonder, how do I define my business or my family’s core values? And let me tell you, it isn’t an overnight process. Our Senior Leadership Team spent many hours, over several days, trying to hone-in on core values. We came up with a long list including some of what you might expect to see, such as honesty, integrity, and respect. We ended up with over 40 words on the list.

Knowing we needed to narrow down the list to only a few, we decided which values were truly “CORE.” We ultimately landed on three core values and let them “simmer” for 30 days, understanding these values are not something we strive for, but values we live by every day. 

From there, we crafted definitions, being very intentional with wording and how we demonstrate them both within our firm and out in the community.

Here’s the big reveal of The Blum Firm’s core values:

  • Excellence:We exceed expectations by delivering superior work with unmatched client service; we expand knowledge, enhance skills, and refine processes to maintain the highest standards of performance and quality. 
  • Relationships:We connect with kindness and humility, actively listening to different perspectives, following through on commitments, and serving as a trusted advisor.
  • Collaboration:We partner with each other and outside advisors to achieve common goals by sharing ideas and leveraging strengths; we remain open to feedback and celebrate each other’s wins.

At the meeting, I shared a story about where The Blum Firm began—just my secretary, Sandy Stroman, and me. Now, 44 years later, the firm has grown and evolved beyond anything I could have imagined. The combination of faith, family, hard work, and education is what brought The Blum Firm to where we are today, a family of 68 dedicated team players who strive together to reach for the stars.

When we define our core principles—whether personally, for our family, or our business—we gain the ability to adapt while remaining true to our essence. This clarity aids in decision-making and unites us to grow and create the legacy we first envisioned.

Adversity will come—I can promise you that—but when it does, returning to your core values will give you the vision for moving forward.

My challenge to you is this: What are your core values?

The Big Reveal: The Blum Firm’s Core Values Read More »

My Granddaughter Stella Becomes a Woman 

Twelve years ago, our first grandchild Stella was born. It seems like yesterday Laurie and I were pacing nervously in the hall at New York’s Mt. Sinai Hospital, waiting to hear that first cry. Fast forward to November 10, 2024, and that little baby Stella became a Bat Mitzvah, the coming of age when a Jewish girl becomes a woman.

Jewish boys celebrate their Bar Mitzvah at age 13. But in traditional Jewish families, girls become a Bat Mitzvah, a daughter of the covenant, at age 12. The idea is that 12-year-old girls are at a maturity level comparable to 13-year-old boys (I might argue that girls hit that point long before age 12).

We celebrated Stella over the last weekend, kicking off with a Friday night dinner at New York’s Altneu Synagogue. As a very proud Zaidy (the Yiddish word for grandfather that my 6 grandkids call me), I had the privilege of speaking at the dinner. Since I’ve become so personal with you all in this Family Legacy Planning blog, I’ll share with you what I had to say.

To my dear granddaughter Stella, the oldest of our 6 grandkids: 

I want to talk to you about trees. You know I love trees and nature. Trees are significant in Judaism. Our Torah is called Etz Chaim, a tree of life, and also a tree of knowledge. But as we celebrate you becoming a Bat Mitzvah, I want to tell you about a different tree — a family tree. The Torah teaches that parents are the trunk of a tree and children are the branches. It also teaches that all future generations are embedded in that tree within their parents, so the tree represents a family’s past, present, and future.

I want to talk about a particular family tree that starts with your ancestors, my grandparents, Meyer & Pauline Oberstein, and goes down l’dor vador, from generation to generation. Stella, you are part of a family tree that has very deep roots. Those roots will keep you secure and grounded when the winds of adversity blow your way. You come from a long line of very strong women.

I want to start with the amazing and strong woman in the first generation in that family tree, my grandmother Pauline, your great great grandmother. Pauline and her family came to America from Ukraine where her family was persecuted because they were Jewish. She arrived in Ellis Island with nothing but her commitment to their Jewish values, joining her brother Joe in Montgomery, Alabama, a place where it wasn’t easy to be religious. Like Abraham and Sarah, they were really alone in their observance, pioneers of Judaism in a new land, as described in your Torah portion, Lech Lecha. 

But Mama Pauline created an observant Jewish home. She lit Shabbos candles every week, strictly observed kashrut and Shabbat,  and remained deeply committed to Jewish values. She was actively involved in their synagogue and establishing a Jewish community deep in the heart of Dixie. Her parents lived with her, also clinging to their Judaism. Her father, our Zaidy, never ate meat in America because he didn’t trust it to be kosher. Mama Pauline only served him fresh vegetables (which she pronounced “vege-TABLES”) because he mistrusted the kashrut of the canning process. When he died, Pauline had his body prepared at home and the funeral was in their living room. She didn’t want Zaidy’s body to ever enter a non-Jewish funeral home. 

The second generation of matriarchs is my mother Elsie, your great grandmother whom you call Bobbie, the same name she called her grandmother, Pauline’s mother Bobbie Leah. Bobbie is also a light unto the world. She is the dynamic force behind our shul in Fort Worth, Texas. Her Hebrew name is Sora Elke, like our matriarch Sarah. Also like our matriarch Sarah, Bobbie leads the way in creating a place for those seeking G-d to come and worship. My mother has devoted her life to strengthening our shul and preserving Jewish values in Fort Worth, Texas, far from the Old Country of her parents.

The next generation is me, along with my beloved bride of 45 years, your Mimi. You know very well how strong Mimi is and what a rock she is in our family.

Next comes your mother, Elizabeth Pauline, named after our matriarch Pauline. Both are named Pesha Ita, and like you, both are lights unto the world. We all know what a power house your mother is, giving her all to support Israel and fight antisemitism. She is a role model of leadership, strength, and courage.

This brings us to generation five. Stella, this is significant: you are the FIRST member of generation five in our family tree, a generation that will someday have more than 100 Jewish cousins in it, with all the Obersteins in our family. But Stella, you are the FIRST. You lead the way. 

Stella, your very birth as a little four pound bundle of joy was a miracle, a symbol that our family is growing and thriving, the start of a new rung on our family tree. As your dad’s Unkie said, your birth signifies that “We beat Hitler!” You were made for this moment. And you’re growing into such a dynamic role model, just like your matriarch ancestors Pauline, Elsie, Laurie, and Lizzy. 

Every week, I learn from your Torah Corner as you explain the week’s parsha in a way like no one else can do. I once filled in for you as the substitute teacher, and I can tell you that it’s a lot harder than it looks. I watched you interview Holocaust survivors in Israel, where you showed so much love and compassion. And I saw how much you care about our people as we toured Yad Vashem and other holy sites in Jerusalem. You have a gift—a gift of connecting with people and bringing light and Jewish values to the world.

My prayer for you is that you grow up strong and courageous, marry the right guy like your mom did, raise a family who carries on the heritage of our ancestors, and that you live a life of purpose, meaning, and fulfillment. 

Shine your light, baby!

With all my love,

Your Zaidy

Sharing this with you, I feel so full of love and gratitude. This weekend was a major link in the Blum Family Legacy chain. Here’s wishing you meaningful moments and milestone memories in your own family legacy journey.

Marvin & Laurie Blum make memories that will last forever at the Bat Mitzvah of their granddaughter Stella.

The Bat Mitzvah celebration continues with Stella and a very proud Zaidy!

My Granddaughter Stella Becomes a Woman  Read More »

Is Your Mind Wired for a “Worst Case” or “Best Case” Scenario?

Here we are on Election Day with a race that’s too close to call. Even after the outcome is known, so much uncertainty lies ahead. How do we deal with the unknowns? Some are wired to see a half-full glass. Good for them. However, for me and most in my network, the tendency is to see the glass half empty. My wonderfully positive wife is helping me learn to shift from “worst case” to “best case” thinking.

Laurie and I recently spent a glorious evening dining with TIGER 21 colleagues. As usual, the conversation was thought-provoking, stimulated by a revelation earlier that day at a TIGER 21 meeting. At the meeting, a hugely successful entrepreneur gave his “Portfolio Defense” and confessed that he still wakes up during the night and worries about his business. Although he’s ten times more successful than he ever imagined, worrying is a habit that is hard to break.

I was visiting with other TIGER 21 members about this and discovered that all of us shared that same mental wiring. We all wake up during the night, the brain activates, and the worry starts. It’s comforting to know I am not alone.

In my recent post, “On Turning 70,” I shared that, looking back on those 70 years, my main regret is all the time I wasted worrying about things that never ended up happening. I announced that my goal going forward is to worry less—easier said than done. But I have something (or rather, someone) going for me to help me in this effort—a very wise and supportive wife of 45 years.

Here’s Laurie’s good counsel to me: when presented with a scenario, instead of always assuming the “worst case” outcome, force your brain to imagine a “best case” outcome. That’s a heavy lift for me, given the natural wiring in my brain and my almost 50 years of lawyering. It’s my job to envision all the “what if’s” that can go wrong and plan ahead for them. But Laurie isn’t letting me off the hook that easy. You have to work at envisioning an ideal outcome. After all, a bright outcome is more likely than a dark one. That’s certainly been the case over the years, as all those things I wasted time and energy worrying about never ended up happening.

So now when I wake up concerned about something, Laurie advises me to imagine the best case outcome. Redirect your thoughts and attach your mind to that best case.

Laurie explained some research that shows how worrying triggers stress and fear, releasing hormones as if what you fear might happen has actually occurred. By shifting your mind to a positive outcome, your energy goes where your thoughts tell it to go. Imagining the best case scenario, you can actually feel the relief and joy that scenario would produce. You’ll begin to feel that relief and joy right now.

I’ve tried it, and it works. It’s not yet natural to me, so I have to work at it. But if you’re wired like me, I highly recommend trying to think “best case” instead of “worst case.”

When I do slip into imagining the worst, Laurie’s provided me with a mantra to repeat in my head: “It’s solvable. If it happens, we will figure it out.” That helps too. And if it doesn’t, I can always wake up Laurie for a middle-of-the-night counseling session. I’m a very lucky guy.

Marvin and Laurie Blum at a dinner party with TIGER 21 colleagues who, like Marvin, find it easier to embrace a “worst case” rather than “best case” scenario. We all need Laurie's wise counsel.

Is Your Mind Wired for a “Worst Case” or “Best Case” Scenario? Read More »

Buffett Changes His Will—Is It Time to Change Yours?

In last week’s 200th post in my Family Legacy Planning series, I reflected on some of my personal favorite posts. Looking back over those 200, one of the most popular and recurring subjects is Warren Buffett, the Oracle of Omaha. People are fascinated with everything Buffett says and does. Today I’ll share an update on Buffett’s estate plan that he recently revealed.

My personal fascination with Buffett started years ago when our family made the annual pilgrimage to Omaha for the Berkshire Hathaway annual meeting. As many as 50,000 gather each year and hang on every word as he answers questions from selected attendees. As I’ve written in this blog, I had the privilege three times of asking questions of Buffett. Click on this link for a prior post covering my questions on Buffett’s estate plan, his philanthropy, and his views on preparing heirs.

For a long time, Buffett’s Will leaves more than 99% of his estate to charity (Berkshire Hathway Inc. News Release, Business Wire, June 28, 2024). With a net worth of more than $100 billion, that money will do a lot of good. But who gets to decide what charities to support? That’s the big change Buffett recently disclosed.

In an earlier version of his Will, Buffett (then the world’s second richest man) was entrusting that task to the world’s then richest man, Bill Gates. Although his lifetime gifts to the Gates Foundation exceed $39 billion, Buffett has decided that’s enough.

Why the shift? The notoriously modest-living (some even say frugal) Buffett expressed concern over Bill Gates’ extravagant billionaire lifestyle—homes, planes, fast cars, art, and a big personal staff. He also has “been bothered by what he saw as the bloat and inflated operating costs” of the Gates Foundation. (Anupreeta Das, “Has the Long Friendship of Bill Gates and Warren Buffett Reached Its Final Act?,” The New York Times, August 4, 2024).

In place of the Gates Foundation, Buffett’s Will now creates a charitable trust to be administered by his three children—Susan, Howard, and Peter. His kids will disburse the funds over a ten-year period following Warren’s death. But here’s the catch: the three must unanimously agree on how to donate the funds. Given that they each have very divergent charitable priorities, many speculate Buffett may be setting up “a version of a philanthropic ‘Succession’” battle. (Madeline Berg, “Warren Buffett Wants His Children to Give Away His $130 Billion Fortune. Does that Set Up a ‘Succession’ ­­– Style Fight?,” Business Insider, July 11, 2024).

Susan, a full-time philanthropist, favors social justice, education, and healthcare. Howard, a farmer and former sheriff, focuses on food security, crime, human trafficking, and aid to Ukraine. Peter, a musician and composer, supports Indigenous communities and combating hunger. It’ll be interesting to see how this unfolds.

Buffett defends his decision after seeing how his children have matured over the years. “’I have 100% trust in how they will carry things out… I like to think I can think outside the box, but I’m not sure if I can think outside the box when it’s 6 feet below the surface and do a better job than three people who are on the surface who I trust completely.’” Buffett adds that his children will be able to respond to any future law changes governing taxes and foundations. (Karen Langley, “Warren Buffett Gives Us a Preview of His Will,” The Wall Street Journal, June 28, 2024).

Here’s my key takeaway: Don’t lock away your Will and fail to update it periodically. Our rule of thumb at The Blum Firm is to review your estate plan at each Presidential election. Over time, your views and your wishes may change. When that happens, it may be time to follow Warren Buffett’s lead and change your Will.

Marvin and Laurie with business and philanthropic role model, Warren Buffett.

Buffett Changes His Will—Is It Time to Change Yours? Read More »

My 200th Post 

This is my 200th post in this Family Legacy Planning series (now called “Blum’s Blog”). The idea for this blog was born during the height of the COVID pandemic. I was sheltering at home, spending 23 hours of every day holed up in our bedroom. Until COVID happened, I never worked at home. I kept a clear separation between work and home. That all changed overnight.

My assistant Cat (whom I often refer to as my “boss”) informed me that, as captain of The Blum Firm team, I had to set the example and work remotely. We set up a desk in our master bedroom with a computer and supplies, and voila! It became my new office. I’d roll out of bed and turn on the computer, breaking only briefly for meals, then roll back into bed late at night. I never stopped working. No bueno, but that was my new M.O.

It was the fall of 2020, approaching October 1st, the 40th anniversary of my founding The Blum Firm. Locked away from the world and all human interaction, what could we possibly do to celebrate it? Then it hit me. On October 1, 2020, I sent out a mass email announcing the launching of a new initiative in 2021 in honor of The Blum Firm’s 40th year milestone. But I didn’t say what the “initiative” was. It was meant as a teaser, not only for the public, but also for me. I still hadn’t fully baked the idea. I needed more time to figure it out.

So, on the first Tuesday of 2021, I announced the birth of this Family Legacy Planning series. My plan was to post weekly for a few months, till I ran out of juice on wisdom to impart. Beyond my wildest expectations, here’s post number 200—never missing a consecutive Tuesday morning, 10:00 Central, blast to your inbox. So far, the juice is still flowing.

This blog has evolved. It started out as a more formal communication, aimed at offering practical estate planning tips to create a lasting legacy. Each post was accompanied by my headshot. Then my dear friend Karen Reisman (a speaking coach with her own inspiring blog, “Speak for Yourself”) told me to stop attaching my “yearbook photo” and offer up a warmer, clever photo instead. I resisted. My audience expected me to be buttoned up, coat and tie. Karen persisted; I gave it a try—lo and behold, Karen was right. Even a serious lawyer could warm up and become more relatable.

Then the next revolutionary change happened. After months of heavy, impersonal content, I took a risk and got personal. Moved by Russia’s vicious attack on Ukraine, I divulged “I Am Ukrainian.” My four grandparents were persecuted in Eastern Europe and came to America barely in time to escape Hitler. The photo was of Zaidy, my one-eyed great grandfather whose eye was poked out in an Ukranian pogrom. I wrote of the importance of preserving family heritage and stories of resilience. The feedback floored me. In response, I became more and more open. I was now feeling a warm connection with my readers. I dispensed with formalities and just wrote from the heart. 

I told more of what makes me tick, my family and friends, my modest “hard knocks” upbringing, even “How a Jukebox Paid for My Bar Mitzvah.” Doing so, I still try to weave in an estate planning lesson in each post. After unintentionally stumbling into these self-revelations, this blog has become somewhat autobiographical. I never saw that coming.

As I reveal more about myself and my family, I had an interesting recent comment from attorney friend Andrew Rosell: “Why is it you write so much more about your daughter Lizzy than your son Adam?” I laughed and responded, “I have a daughter that loves the spotlight and a son who prefers privacy.” For those of you who’ve raised kids from the same gene pool but who turned out totally different, I’m sure you can relate.

Click on the link below to peruse all 200 posts and see which ones catch your eye. My personal favorite is my five-part series from a year ago about our week in Israel, culminating with the vicious terrorist attack by Hamas. That day changed my life forever.

I’ll close with a hearty thank you for all the affirming feedback I receive each week. You are all my friends now. And maybe someday, I’ll give into the clamoring from all those encouraging me to write a book. If I ever do, it will read differently than the “How to Do Estate Planning” manual I’d have written a few years ago.

Feeling gratitude for the support of devoted readers, Marvin Blum celebrates the 200th post in his weekly Family Legacy Planning series.

My 200th Post  Read More »

Passing Down Legacy Real Estate—Family Glue or Family Feud? 

Does your family own a meaningful real estate asset that you’d like to keep in the family? Maybe it’s a childhood home, lake or beach house, vacation home, or ranch. Places like that hold special memories. Gathering there can provide powerful family glue for kids and grandkids. Passing down legacy real estate to future generations requires special planning, or else the hoped for “glue” causes a family to become “unglued.”

At The Blum Firm, we work with many families who own real estate that is precious to them. For example, we’re working now with a family of college football fans who owns a “game day house” near their team’s stadium. Since Laurie and I raised a son who is also a passionate football fan (or should I say “fanatic”), I understand the passion associated with that property. In their eyes, it’s not just a “house.”

While the matriarch and patriarch are alive, they foot the bill to cover operating costs such as taxes, insurance, utilities, housekeeping, lawn care, maintenance and repairs. Mom and dad also establish the rules for shared use, including overseeing the calendar for who gets to use it and when. But who steps into that role when parents are gone and the home is co-owned by siblings, and further down the road when it’s owned by cousins?

Hayley Cuccinello grapples with these issues in her article, “Who Gets the Hamptons House? How Rich Americans Give Homes to Their Children Without Causing Feuds,” (Business Insider, August 13, 2024). She quotes Adam Ludman, head of tax advisory at J.P. Morgan Private Bank: “‘You have to start by recognizing that the family home or the vacation home is more than a financial asset. It is deeply personal.’” Cuccinello elaborates: “Even among rich heirs, passing on real estate without proper planning can lead to sibling strife. Who gets the Hamptons house for July 4? What if one sibling wants to renovate the Aspen chalet and the others don’t want to split the cost?” 

We recommend a multi-step solution:

  1. Transfer the real estate to an entity (such as an LLC) to limit liability exposure. If someone’s injured there, you want to insulate your other assets from being reachable.
  2. Consult with an insurance professional for optimum coverage.
  3. Create an LLC Operating Agreement to cover the rules for shared use.
  4. Transfer the LLC interests to a FAST trust (Family Advancement Sustainability Trust) to remove the real estate from your estate, avoiding a 40% estate tax at death. With the lifetime exemption at almost $14 million ($28 million for a couple), now is the ideal time to make that transfer, locking in the doubled exemption before it sunsets in half at midnight on December 31, 2025.
  5. Provide a governance structure in the FAST to insure selection of LLC managers who will honor the founders’ intent.
  6. Fund the FAST with assets that generate a sufficient cash flow to cover the ongoing cost of operations. In many cases, the ideal solution is a life insurance policy on the parents, with proceeds payable at their death to the FAST.
  7. Build in flexibility into the FAST and LLC agreements, so the plan is not set in stone. As Ludman cautions, “‘Families obviously evolve and expand, and circumstances can change.’”

Every family has unique considerations. This isn’t a one-size-fits-all situation. The Blum Firm would be honored to help you tailor a solution for your legacy real estate that matches the needs of your family.

Whether you’re leaving your heirs a Texas ranch or a home in the Hamptons, Marvin Blum provides planning tips for shared use of a family’s legacy real estate.

Passing Down Legacy Real Estate—Family Glue or Family Feud?  Read More »

No Matter Who Wins the Election, Now Is the Ideal Time to Do Tax & Estate Planning 

National Estate Planning Awareness Week is coming up in two weeks. For me, that week comes 52 times a year. But I guess Hallmark needed an excuse for another greeting card. So let me be the first to wish all of you a Happy Estate Planning Awareness Week!

In honor of that special week, I am devoting this post to urgent tax planning considerations given today’s volatile political climate. I’m reminded of the Chinese fortune cookie that says, “May you live in interesting times.” When it comes to tax law, we are certainly living in “interesting times!”

I note that this post is based on my upcoming presentation at the virtual Oil & Gas Investor Summit, where I will be speaking on the topic entitled “No Matter Who Wins the Election, Now is the Ideal Time to Do Tax & Estate Planning.” You can tune in to the summit by registering for free here, and I will be speaking tomorrow around 5 PM Central Time. If you miss it but still want to watch, the recording will be posted on the website as soon as it’s available. Also, a copy of my PowerPoint can be found here. As I stated at the start of my presentation, I am not taking any political positions in this discussion. I’m not advocating for the red or the blue. I deliberately wore a purple tie so no one could draw an inference from a tie that was red or blue. I’m just presenting facts.

As described below, the presentation explores how the election outcome may impact tax law under three scenarios: Divided Government, Triple D (Democrat White House, Senate, & House), and Triple R (Republican sweep). We have no way of predicting which outcome will happen, but regardless of who wins, here’s what we know for sure:

  • Most of the tax cuts in the 2017 Trump Tax Act (“Tax Cuts & Jobs Act”) will sunset at midnight on December 31, 2025. Plan now to lock in tax benefits before they expire.
  • Neither party is proposing to lower individual income tax rates. No matter who wins, income tax rates won’t go down.
  • The recent rise in interest rates and government spending has more than doubled the annual cost of US debt service. A day of reckoning is coming when we’ll have to deal with the soaring national debt.
  • No matter the election results, tax law change is coming. Take advantage of extraordinary opportunities in today’s “Golden Age of Estate Planning” before the window closes.
  • History tells us that those who plan under the current law, before new laws go into effect, will most likely be grandfathered.

We recently learned that the lifetime estate exemption rises on New Year’s Day 2025 to $13,990,000 per person (for ease of discussion, let’s round that to $14 million). But be aware that on New Year’s Eve 2025, that $14 million exemption shrinks to $7 million. As I’ve so often encouraged, now’s the time to do “squeeze & freeze” planning to lock in the extra $7 million before it goes to zero. It’s a “use it or lose it” situation. And with the top income tax rate rising from 37% to 39.6% in 2026, consider doing a Roth IRA conversion in 2025 and paying a lower income tax hit. The PowerPoint goes into detail on these and other ideas, but I’ll close with what to anticipate under the three election scenarios. 

 

If We Have a Divided Government

  • Most tax cuts in 2017 Tax Act will sunset; it’s already baked into the law.
  • Ordinary income tax rate will increase from 37% to 39.6%. (Note: corporate tax stays at 21% but 20% 199A deduction expires).
  • Convert a traditional IRA to Roth in 2025, and pay income tax hit at lower rates.
  • Accelerate income/ take gains in 2025 rather than 2026.
  • Postpone SALT (state and local tax) payments/ property taxes exceeding $10,000 until 2026 (when $10,000 SALT cap is gone).
  • Make large cash gifts to public charities before AGI deduction cap sunsets from 60% to 50%; otherwise consider postponing contributions to 2026 when tax rates are higher.
  • Lock in the $7 million “bonus” lifetime exemption before it goes to zero.
  • Review formula gifts in estate plans tied to size of the exemption.

 

If We Have a Triple D Outcome

  • Quickly engage in “squeeze & freeze” transfers to trusts.
  • Use in-kind assets to repay balance due on notes from prior sales to grantor trusts.
  • Anticipate these possible changes (in addition to sunset):
  • Reduce lifetime exemption to $3.5 million.
  • Increase long-term capital gain rate from 20% to 28% (for investors with income over $1 million).
  • Increase NII (net investment income) tax from 3.8% to 5%.
  • Impose an annual tax on unrealized gains for taxpayers worth $100 million.
  • Increase corporate tax from 21% to 28%.
  • Increase estate tax rates from 40% to 55%, 60%, 65%.
  • Limit valuation discounts.
  • End use of grantor trusts.
  • Eliminate basis step-up at death.
  • Limit annual exclusion gifts to $10,000 per person and $20,000 per donor per year.

 

If We Have a Triple R Outcome

  • Anticipate efforts to make tax cuts in 2017 Act permanent.
  • $10,000 SALT (state & local taxes) cap likely to remain in place.
  • Expect efforts to reduce capital gains tax and corporate income tax.
  • Expect provisions to eliminate tax on tips and on social security benefits.
  • Do not anticipate efforts to reduce individual income tax rates. 

 

Once again, Happy Estate Planning Awareness Week to everyone. My hope is that you’ll use it to take advantage of “Golden Age of Estate Planning” before it’s too late.

Marvin Blum prepares to deliver a one-hour presentation, entitled "No Matter Who Wins the Election, Now Is the Ideal Time to Do Tax & Estate Planning," at the upcoming virtual Oil & Gas Investor Summit.

No Matter Who Wins the Election, Now Is the Ideal Time to Do Tax & Estate Planning  Read More »

The Day That Changed My Life Forever   

“Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning?” Alan Jackson’s country song captures how I felt one year ago. The first time I felt that way was in my fourth-grade classroom the day President Kennedy had breakfast here in Fort Worth, then was assassinated in Dallas by lunchtime. I felt that way again on 9/11 as the horrors unfolded.  And a year ago, I was reeling from the most vicious and deadly attack against Jews since the Holocaust. Next week marks one year since October 7, 2023, when Hamas terrorists unleashed the most inhumane attack imaginable against Israel. Laurie and I had just left Israel on one of the last American Airlines flights to take off before shutting down operations (and to this day, they have still not resumed service). October 7 transformed me. My life will never be the same after that day.

For a few brief moments, there was compassion for Israel. I knew from history that it wouldn’t last long. Indeed, within days, the sympathy for Israel vanished from the public square. The narrative was replaced with hate crimes against Jews and antisemitic rallies calling for the annihilation of Israel “from the river to the sea.” These protests have escalated at an alarming rate, become more and more hateful and violent against Jews. In particular, Jewish students are unsafe and unprotected on college campuses across the US. 

Here we are one year later, and there are still over 100 hostages held captive in Gaza. Some are US citizens. Where is a worldwide, all-out effort to rescue them? The silence of the masses speaks volumes.

Although I expected some rise in antisemitism, what is actually happening far exceeds my worst fears and shakes me to the core. The level of hate that has surfaced is a harsh wake-up call, and a reminder of another time in history that we naively thought wouldn’t happen again in our lifetime. What we’re seeing eerily resembles the pattern of Jew hatred that took over Eastern Europe in the 1930s. Before calling me an alarmist, let me share that Jews in Europe were living a luxurious life before Hitler came to power. My son-in-law Ira has an uncle (affectionately called “Unkie”) who was imprisoned in concentration camps and lived to warn us: “You think you’re comfortable in America? Well let me tell you something, we were just as comfortable in Europe. You don’t think it can happen again. I’m telling you it can.” Pay attention to the signs—the noise is coming from the media, the internet, elected officials, professors and students on college campuses, the entertainment industry, all blaming the Jews. It’s everywhere. It’s even become a topic among Jews to ask each other: “If a Holocaust happens again, who would hide you?”

My wife Laurie had an intellectual Aunt Marjorie who lived in Israel. I once asked her to tell me the lesson of the Holocaust, and the simplicity of her answer surprised me: “When someone says they want to kill you, you should believe them.” Over and over, we say, “Never Again.” But here we are again. Israel is surrounded by enemies who openly shout their intention to kill every Jew and push Israel into the sea. We should believe them.

In spite of the horror, there are some silver linings. It’s times like these that I feel a deeper connection to my loved ones, both family and friends. To those of you who are on our team, siding with good over evil, I express abundant gratitude. Your support means the world to me. 

On a very personal note, I’ll reveal a choice I silently made after October 7. I have always observed a semi-kosher diet, never eating pork or shellfish. But I’ve now gone all in and stopped eating all non-kosher meat. Every time I eat, I get a feeling of solidarity with my people. As Rabbi Mark Wildes teaches, stepping up our game awakens in us a very intense pride in being Jewish.  I’ve been very private about this and only share this at my daughter’s urging. Perhaps others might find meaning in doing something similar, such as lighting Shabbat candles or saying daily prayers.

I’ll also share that I am extremely proud of our kids who have become strong advocates for our people. Adam was appointed by Governor Abbott to serve on the Texas Holocaust, Genocide, and Antisemitism Advisory Commission. Lizzy is a tireless and courageous activist supporting Israel in the public arena and on her social media Instagram platform LizzySavetsky. Speaking of their advocacy brings back an old memory from my high school days when I was the Texas chair of SSSJ (Student Struggle for Soviet Jewry) to bring awareness to Russia’s persecution of Jews. I’d tucked that story away and never even mentioned that to Laurie or my kids. 

Standing up for our people is deeply woven into the fabric of our family. By taking action, raising our voices, and tightly banding together, I have faith that we will survive. And through that tight togetherness, our family is creating a powerful legacy to pass down from generation to generation — a legacy of faith, courage, and devotion to our people.

Tomorrow evening begins the Jewish High Holiday season. Wishing all a meaningful Rosh Hashanah and a more peaceful 5785.

Marvin Blum and his family celebrating a year ago in Israel for the “upsherin” first haircut of 3-year-old grandson Ollie, a glorious week that ended in horror.

Marvin’s daughter Lizzy and her two daughters Stella and Juliet (left) and son-in-law Ira (far right) praying in a Jerusalem bomb shelter after the October 7 attack on Israel.

The Day That Changed My Life Forever    Read More »

A Cost-Free Way to Supercharge the Charitable Gifts in Your Estate  

In last week’s post, I covered the complex analysis involved in filling out a beneficiary form for a retirement account. For example, I stressed the benefits of leaving your retirement accounts to an Accumulation Trust, rather than outright to your kids. As I have been highlighting in this Family Legacy Planning series, it’s important to give careful thought to your kids’ inheritance. How much is too much to leave to your kids? What’s the right balance between leaving assets to your kids vs. leaving assets to charities?

When dividing assets between kids and charities, the asset mix usually contains retirement assets and non-retirement assets. All of these assets are potentially subject to estate tax. But retirement assets are also subject to income tax. When leaving retirement assets to your kids, there’s a double whammy tax hit, often leaving only 20 cents of each dollar to your kids.

However, if you fill out the beneficiary designation form to pass retirement assets to charity, the charity keeps 100 cents of each dollar. As you allocate assets between your kids and charities, it is most tax efficient to leave your retirement accounts to charity, avoiding both estate tax and income tax on those assets. The portion you leave your kids should come from the non-retirement portion of your estate.

Consider this simple example. Your estate contains a $100,000 IRA and $100,000 cash. You plan to leave $100,000 to charity and $100,000 to your kids. If you leave cash to charity and the IRA to the kids (who are in a 35% income tax bracket), the kids pay $35,000 income tax on the IRA. Net result: charity gets $100,000, kids get $65,000. Let’s reverse it and give the IRA to charity and cash to the kids. A charity is exempt from tax, so it pays no income tax on the IRA. Net result: charity gets $100,000, kids get $100,000.

Note that for any IRAs designated to pass to charity, do not elect to convert those to Roth IRAs. By converting to Roth, you would be unnecessarily incurring an income tax cost that would be avoided when the assets pass to charity. It’s more tax efficient to leave traditional IRAs to charity and Roth IRAs to your family.

In leaving retirement assets to charity, consider these choices:

  • Outright to your favorite public charities;
  • A Donor Advised Fund, where your family can designate the charities they would like to benefit and spread out the donations over the years following your death;
  • A Private Family Foundation managed by your family, which can be a powerful source of “glue” for future generations to stay connected.

The Blum Firm works actively to help our clients structure their charitable and family inheritances in the most tax efficient way. We would be honored to assist you in this important endeavor.

Marvin Blum is in a quandary over how to fill out retirement plan beneficiary forms. Do I name my kids, or do I name a charity?

A Cost-Free Way to Supercharge the Charitable Gifts in Your Estate   Read More »

“I Just Have One Simple Question” – NOT! 

It happens all the time. My assistant Cat receives this call: “I just have one simple question for Marvin. How should I fill out the beneficiary designation form for my retirement plan?” As explained below, that question is anything but simple. Moreover, it’s critically important. The beneficiary designation form (not your Will) is the document that dictates where your retirement account goes when you die. And very often, the retirement account is the biggest asset in the estate.

In my post dated July 30th, I told the horror story of a retirement account (which was almost the entire estate) passing to a long-lost girlfriend. The beneficiary designation form hadn’t been updated in nearly 40 years! When you update your Will, don’t forget to also update your beneficiary forms.

For those who are married with kids, the “knee jerk” is to just designate your spouse, then your kids. However, the estate plan often contains trusts to protect assets from divorce, creditors, and taxes. By designating individuals, the retirement assets pass outright, and you lose all the important trust protections over those assets.

The better plan is usually to designate a trust as the beneficiary—but not just any trust. To achieve optimal tax benefits, it has to be a trust with special provisions, such as an “Accumulation Trust.” Such a trust allows for the longest possible stretch out, and assets paid into it are protected until needed. Until spent, the assets are in a pocket free from reach by creditors or divorcing spouses.

Roth IRAs can accumulate free of income tax. The decision to convert a traditional IRA to a Roth IRA (and pay the income tax hit early) involves a complicated mathematical analysis. With income tax rates rising in 2026, many plan to convert to a Roth in 2025 and pay the tax at today’s lower rates. But for those not converting to Roth, be aware that traditional IRAs are hit with income tax as the assets are distributed. There is a complex maze of tax rules to navigate in order to achieve optimal income tax deferral.

One more thing—if your estate makes a charitable gift, the most tax-efficient way to do it is to designate the charity as the beneficiary of retirement assets. Designating a charity avoids paying income tax and estate tax on the retirement assets. I’ll explain in more detail in next week’s post.

Suffice to say, how to fill out your retirement beneficiary form is no simple question!

Marvin Blum’s assistant, Cat Bardin, receives a call asking “just one simple question” on how to fill out a retirement plan beneficiary form—not a simple question!

“I Just Have One Simple Question” – NOT!  Read More »

Three Role Models for Aging with Dignity

President Biden’s painful exit from his reelection campaign, coupled with my 70th birthday, got me thinking about how to age with dignity. What lessons can we learn so that, as we approach the final chapter, we can go out on top? I identified many role models who continued to hit home runs in their final innings. For today’s post, I narrowed it to a diverse trio: Lou Barnett (patriarch of the Fort Worth Jewish community), Henry Kissinger, and Dolly Parton.

I’ll start closest to home with Lou Barnett, who made it past 100 before he left us. When he was still a young 94, I had the privilege of interviewing him on May 19, 2013. He may be gone physically, but he lives on through the wisdom he imparted to me that day. When I asked for his reflections, Lou responded with 18 tips. In Hebrew, the letters that signify 18 are chet (8) and yud (10), spelling chai, the Hebrew word for “life.” (“To life, to life, L’chaim!”) How appropriate that Lou’s stream of consciousness happened to provide 18 tips for living a beautiful life.

Click on the link at the bottom of the post to read the entire list, but here are a few highlights:

• Family, first and foremost. Family is by far the most important thing in the world.

• Find a hobby. Get away from the cell phone and disconnect from the world.

• Laugh at yourself. Don’t take yourself too seriously.

• Live! Don’t live like you’re coming back. It’s later than you think.

• Go see your grandkids often and be a part of their lives.

• Don’t carry a grudge. Let it go.

Like Lou Barnett, Former Secretary of State Henry Kissinger also made it to 100 with grace and purpose till his final days. In his essay on Kissinger, Eric Schmidt (former CEO of Google) explained the key: “How did Henry make it to 100? He never retired. Until shortly before his death, he was working as hard as he did when he was 70. From the moment he woke up, he was thinking, taking joy in following a new idea, a new strategy, a new challenge. He never lost his deep commitment to making the world safer and more prosperous” (The Wall Street Journal, December 2, 2023).

Harvard professor Arthur Brooks elaborates on Kissinger’s formula for successful aging. Brooks credits Kissinger with transforming into a senior role, becoming an “eminence” who wasn’t expected to “have the rigor and the focus and the energy to be putting in the grinding work of national and international governance… Nobody wanted to elect Kissinger as president of the United States; people just wanted his opinion on the issues of the day” (“The Essence of Retiring Well,” The Atlantic, July 5, 2024). 

And finally, let’s hear it for country music legend Dolly Parton, a rockstar role model at age 78 who “shows no signs of letting up.” In “Dolly Parton on How She Succeeds in Business,” Deena Shanker reveals: “Dolly Parton is a live performer, recording artist, songwriter, novelist, philanthropist, Netflix producer, theme-park operator, and hotelier, just to name a handful of her business ventures. She sells everything from dog accessories to fragrances and even muffin mixes. How does she keep up the momentum? ‘I work my butt off,’ she says.”

Parton also believes you have to be present to win. She challenges the post-COVID world of remote working. “In an age where ‘quiet quitting’ has pervaded workplaces across the US and hustle culture is being criticized by the rising number of Gen-Zers shuffling into the office (or Zoom rooms), Parton works for her success, way past 9 to 5.”

So, for those like me who seek guidance on how to remain relevant till the end, let’s learn from Lou Barnett, Henry Kissinger, and Dolly Parton. In doing so, Arthur Brooks wisely admonishes us of the need to adjust to the role that best suits us, which changes over time. Brooks suggests that role may be more as a teacher than an innovator. Or, as my esteemed colleague Matt Wesley so powerfully describes—there comes a time when you need to move from being quarterback to being coach.

 

Marvin Blum’s Interview of Lou Barnett—May 19, 2013

Henry Kissinger stayed on top of his game all the way to 100.

Dolly Parton achieves success at age 78 by merging the gift of creativity with plain old hard work.

Three Role Models for Aging with Dignity Read More »

Julius Blum, a Role Model from “The Greatest Generation”

My recent post, “I’m a Graduate of Blum’s Café School of Hard Knocks,” focused on the lessons in life I learned from my hard-working father, Julius Blum. That post generated a heart-warming reaction from many of my readers. Although my dad’s been gone for 21 years, he’s very much alive in my heart.

I wrote of the hard-knocks world at Blum’s Café, nestled in Fort Worth’s smelly and sweaty meat packing district. One response summed it up and meant a lot to me: “The Blum family was an important piece of the packing house fabric in the stockyards. A sweet, hard-working family.” I chuckled at another line in his message: “Marvin was smart and got out of there ASAP.” True, but I took the lessons of that world with me.

My dear friend Lisa Mikus asked if my dad was part of “The Greatest Generation from the WWII era—I’m so in awe of that generation.” That swelled up my admiration for my dad’s service in the U.S. Army during World War II. As was typical of these men, he rarely spoke of it. He finally opened up during our nightly visits during his final year, dying of pancreatic cancer at age 77.

Julius Blum was a true patriot, pro-America all-the-way. I only knew him as strong and brave, but a letter we found after he died revealed the fear he masked as he was going off to war. In the letter, he confided to his sister Sophia the trepidation and home-sickness he felt as he was about to be shipped off overseas. I never saw that side of him. That was a powerful revelation.

As patriotic as my dad was, he didn’t want to see my brother Irwin or me shipped off to Vietnam. That was a different kind of war. When President Johnson called for a surge in troops, every young man (including Irwin and me) received a draft number. The higher the number, the better the odds for avoiding the draft.

I remember it like yesterday—December 1, 1969, the day draft numbers were chosen by lottery. A large glass vessel held 366 blue capsules, each containing a birth date from January 1 through December 31 (including one for February 29). We were all glued to the television to discover, day by day, the number corresponding to our birthday. Irwin (who was three years older) got a high draft number—big relief! I wasn’t so lucky—the number corresponding to August 8 was low.

This quote summed up my feelings: “The draft deepened the rift that already existed in our country; the divide, expressed in bumper stickers. America, Love It or Leave It was one; Hell No, We Won’t Go was another. I loved America, but I didn’t want to end up in a body bag. I didn’t want to leave the country, either, dodging the draft by fleeing to Canada. And I had no interest in burning things, whether it was the flag or my draft card.” Those are the eloquent words of Byron Gossett in his outstanding book, Expand the Frame.

My father, the patriot, shared my feelings. We sweated out the next few years until it was my time to be drafted, and then at the eleventh hour came the announcement that the draft was ending, just as they got to my turn. Once again, big relief!

 The country survived the turbulence of Vietnam—And now, here we are again in turbulent political times. As we wrestle with political discord, I’ll share one more lesson from my dad. We can disagree, but let’s do so civilly. Harvard professor Arthur Brooks disclosed in a speech I attended that one in six families don’t talk to each other because of politics. That was April 27, 2023. It’s likely worse today. My father would never allow political views to tear apart a family. He was a role model for civility.

 I’ll close with a simple illustration from my early memories. My dad was politically conservative. On the other hand, I was a youthful liberal, largely influenced by our staunch Democrat housekeeper, Nelsie, whom I adored. I vocally supported JFK to my Nixon-voting dad. It got more potent in the next election. I made a poster promoting LBJ and proudly displayed it in our front yard. To my dismay, my dad supported Goldwater. But whether it was JFK vs. Tricky Dick or LBJ vs. Au-H2O, it never affected our relationship and love for each other. And he never asked me to remove that poster from our yard!

In my quest to help families stay connected and build a meaningful family legacy, may the lessons of Julius Blum inspire us. Inevitably, we will disagree, mightily at times. But let’s discover and celebrate our commonalities, fighting the temptation to let discord tear us apart. It’s not worth it.

Marvin Blum’s father Julius Blum as a young soldier, a role model for patriotism and civility. May we learn from his example.

Julius Blum, a Role Model from “The Greatest Generation” Read More »

What Kamala Didn’t Say

At last week’s Democratic National Convention, Kamala Harris delivered a stirring “New Way Forward.” Here’s what Kamala didn’t reveal: How do we pay for it? However, her campaign has quietly endorsed legislation to raise taxes, such as Senator Elizabeth Warren’s Bill to pay for the proposed housing program.

Click on this link for a recap of the key provisions of this legislation. But without diving into specifics, let’s focus on the benefits of “squeeze & freeze” planning using tools this new law would eliminate. Squeeze planning involves transferring assets to a Family Limited Partnership (“FLP”) and achieving a valuation discount. Freeze planning involves transferring your discounted FLP interests to certain trusts to remove the assets from your estate. Through proper squeeze & freeze planning, you can save estate tax and also protect assets from creditors, but retain control, access, and flexibility.

 Squeeze & freeze planning can generate millions of dollars of tax savings. In one recent case, The Blum Firm actually saved a family over one billion dollars, which the IRS approved on audit of the estate tax return. If Harris gets her way, squeeze & freeze, along with other tax saving tools, will soon go away.

 If you start planning soon, there’s still time to lock in the benefits. Similar legislation came within two votes of becoming law in 2021. Here’s an important takeaway from the lessons of 2021: if you completed your planning before the law change, you’d be grandfathered. In a new administration, law changes can happen fast. It takes time to do this planning, so it’s wise to get an early start.

 Most of our clients are investors who are aiming to grow a portfolio. The goal is to maximize returns, but with the least possible risk (a concept known as “investment alpha”). In his July 2015 article “The Only Form of Pure Alpha,” Steven Lockshin defines pure alpha as “an increase in net results with zero increase in portfolio risk.” Per Lockshin, the only form of pure alpha is tax planning: “tax management can have a far greater effect on a wealthy family’s overall wealth” than investment returns. In particular, “‘estate tax alpha’ will almost undoubtedly dwarf long-term market gains.”

Lockshin illustrates with two hypotheticals, each investing a $10 million portfolio. Advisor A takes more risk and yields an 8% return, growing $10 million to $217 million over 40 years. Advisor A fails to do tax planning, resulting in an $82 million estate tax, netting the next-gen $135 million. Advisor B invests more conservatively, yields a lower return, but transfers assets in a discounted manner to a generation-skipping trust at inception. The outcome? Advisor B beats Advisor A by $80 million. It doesn’t have to be either/or—do both! Aim for higher returns and do tax planning.

Michael Sonnenfeldt, founder of TIGER 21, once commented at a speech I gave: “Return on investment is a rounding error compared to estate tax planning.” Similarly, my TIGER 21 chair Jack Mueller remarked: “Good estate planning trumps investment return any day.”

Per Lockshin, don’t count on your investment advisor or the media to tell you about tax alpha. It doesn’t generate commissions, and “the idea of beating the market is sexier.” Lockshin concludes that wealth “is only valuable to the extent that you can keep it in your family’s hands and out of Uncle Sam’s…. With no increase in risk, but significant increase in net results to your family, tax planning is the only form of pure alpha.”

I couldn’t have said it better myself. And given today’s political climate, I submit that the need to do tax planning is urgent. It may soon be too late.

At last week’s Democratic National Convention, Kamala Harris unveiled her “New Way Forward.” What she didn’t reveal is how to pay for it, but we know—the tax man is coming!

What Kamala Didn’t Say Read More »

Best Companies to Work For in Fort Worth 2024 Award

Marvin Blum pays tribute to The Blum Firm team for receiving the Best Companies to Work For in Fort Worth 2024 Award.

I want to attribute this post to my wonderful work “family,” a term I use very sincerely. As the adage goes, “It takes a village,” and that cannot be more true. The Blum Firm was recently recognized as one of the Best Companies to Work For in Fort Worth 2024, and to say I am overwhelmed with gratitude is an understatement. Upon receiving the news, I couldn’t help but reflect on our phenomenal team and the path that got us where we are today.

 To paint a picture of how richly blessed I am, I will start from the beginning, when I was at my first lawyer job in the Big Law world. It was not a happy fit for me, so when I left to form The Blum Firm, I made a vow to create a caring environment where people would be surrounded by coworkers who support each other and care about each other. And that is precisely what happened. 

When I’m asked about my greatest professional accomplishment, the answer is easy: it’s the team I’ve assembled. We share a commitment to our clients and each other, and we strive for excellence in everything we do. No one here is flying solo. We know we can rely on the strengths of everyone in the firm to always be there to help, making each of us a better professional and a happier worker. When I left the big law firm, my father-in-law wisely said, “Don’t be mad at them. Send them a thank-you note.” And was Abe Kriger right! Every day, I send a mental thank-you note that I get to spend my work hours with a wonderful work family.

I am reminded of a quote from Albert Einstein, “Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.” Our team of attorneys, paralegals, legal assistants, and all the other members of our support team are successful because they focus on providing meaningful work and repeatedly go above and beyond to help us achieve our mission:

  • Caring for our clients and each other;
  • Collaborating with other advisors and among ourselves;
  • Creating a community of character and talent.

Each takes pride in bringing their best to work every day. And there’s no ego—we just want the best solutions for our clients.

 Receiving the Best Companies to Work For in Fort Worth 2024 Award is a true reflection of our team and their hard work and dedication. As I said above, “It takes a village,” and boy, am I so thankful for my village!

Marvin proudly holds the award plaque, showcasing his immense gratitude for his team achieving such an honor.

Best Companies to Work For in Fort Worth 2024 Award Read More »

Happy “Sobriety” Birthday to My Daughter

Last week’s post was about my 70th birthday, which I celebrated joyfully a few days ago, and I now embark on my eighth decade with renewed energy. In today’s post, I want to share another birthday we celebrated this month in our family. With my daughter Lizzy’s permission (indeed, her encouragement), I am grateful to rejoice in Lizzy’s 3rd “sobriety” birthday. As I’ve revealed in the past, Lizzy is waging a very successful but hard-fought battle against alcoholism. August 1, 2024, marks the completion of 3 years being sober.

Lizzy encourages me to tell her story with the hope it will help others who are battling addiction. I am proud of her willingness to be open and transparent about her struggle with alcohol dependency. So many are suffering in silence. Lizzy is a champion for saying you don’t have to live like that. She acknowledges that it’s a tough road, but there is help out there. Don’t try to fight this disease alone. Find a program that works for you, like Lizzy is doing.

Thanks to her program, Lizzy enjoys a very purpose-driven and meaningful life. In addition, her whole family benefits from her ability to be fully present and engaged with them. In fact, Lizzy, Ira, and their 3 kids just completed a three-week trip to Israel, where they brought comfort to families who are suffering from losses and injuries due to the war that began when Hamas attacked Israel on October 7, 2023.  Their 3 kids are actively involved as well, providing love to these victims and to families of those still held hostage for 312 days now. Lizzy’s full-time mission is to fight antisemitism and support Israel through her social media platform, LizzySavetsky- work that wouldn’t be possible were it not for Lizzy’s sobriety. Laurie and I are very grateful and proud parents.

I learned this week that in some programs, a person with a sobriety birthday randomly selects a card that depicts a value to embrace for the coming year. The value one such person selected was the word “joy.” That person’s goal for the coming year is to experience joy.

 That story brings to mind something that I experienced that I’d like to share. In one of my TIGER 21 meetings, we engaged in a “values exercise.” We were each presented with cards containing 56 values and directed to sort them into 3 stacks revealing how they apply to us: (1) always, (2) sometimes, (3) never. We then narrowed the “always” stack down to 10 and prioritized them, building a pyramid with our number one on top, followed by the next two, then the next three, then the next four. We assigned numerical weights and reported each of our results to the group. The group then constructed a group pyramid with the group’s top 10. It was fascinating to compare my individual pyramid to the group pyramid. 

Here was my main takeaway: One of the group’s top 5 values was “joy.” The word “joy” was nowhere on my values pyramid. It never dawned on me that seeking joy was an appropriate goal. As a person who is (obsessively) productive, I never allowed myself to prioritize joy. Seeing how highly it ranked with the rest of my TIGER 21 group was a big wake-up call for me.

A values exercise like this is a very meaningful activity for a family meeting. As I continue to promote family legacy planning, the cornerstone of that process is the family meeting. I commend to you to bring your family together and engage in meaningful conversation and learning, and in doing so, reveal the values that your family holds in common. It’s a great unifying activity—what I often call “family glue.”

So, as I embark on my eighth decade, I am choosing the word “joy” as my new word of the year. It won’t replace my other values, but as I celebrate this 70th birthday, it’s time to smell the roses.

I do have some dissonance advocating the idea of “joy” during these very disturbing times, as my people are targets for unimaginable hate and terrorism. However, rabbis teach that G-d wants us to continue to celebrate life, even in the midst of our suffering. My heart is heavy, but I can still feel abundant gratitude, and yes—even “joy”—for all the blessings in my life.

Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky (pictured here with her 3 kids) celebrated three years of sobriety, a golden gift to her and her loved ones.

Marvin expresses his immeasurable love for his daughter Lizzy.

Happy “Sobriety” Birthday to My Daughter Read More »

On Turning 70

I turn 70 on August 8th. I used to think 70 was old—I don’t anymore. I don’t feel 70, maybe more like 50. But when I look in the mirror, it says 70.

Every birthday is a time for introspection and reflection, but especially those decade birthdays. As I engage in this self-assessment, questions abound about past, present, and future Marvin. How have past highs and lows shaped me? Where am I now in my life journey? Where am I going in (G-d willing) the days that lie ahead?

Some of my introspection is colored by a thought-provoking article by Anne Lamott, “It’s not so terribly strange to be 70” (The Washington Post, April 10, 2024). “Today, when I woke up, I was 70. Seventy! I think that I am only 57, but the paperwork does not back this up… When younger people ask me when I graduated from high school and I say 1971 [1972 in my case], there’s a moment’s pause, as if this is inconceivable and I might as well have said 20 B.C. That’s when I feel my age. But… I would not go back even one year.”

I have shared that the Blum Family Mission Statement focuses on Relationships, Productive Work, Spirituality, and Memorable Moments. I’ll use that framework to organize my reflections.

  • Relationships- My gratitude for the supportive and loving communities in my life is off-the-charts. I am richly blessed by my connection with family, friends, and faith. I can handle whatever adversity life throws my way because I’m not flying solo.
  • Productive Work- I am grateful to wake up each day with purpose. I’ve shared repeatedly my desire to keep working. Retirement isn’t in my vocabulary, as long as my mind and body cooperate.
  • Spirituality- It brings me great comfort to know I’m a link in a long, unbroken chain of family who cling tightly to our faith. But aside from religion, I feel powerful spirituality from walks in nature, cuddling with my six precious grandkids, and painting pictures. Whether at the easel or not, I am always painting in my mind.
  • Memorable Moments- Speaking of painting, Lamott writes of the beauty of shadows. “Shadows show us how life can gleam in contrast.” That’s true in all my paintings, but it’s also true in life experiences. The sweet moments are all the sweeter because they stand in contrast to the turbulent ones that taught me resilience, gratitude, and shaped me into the man I am today. So, as I reflect on births, weddings, Bar Mitzvahs, and graduations, I also recall life’s tornadoes (like the literal one that destroyed my law office in 2000 and the figurative ones like the deaths of loved ones). 

We are living in turbulent times. The attack on Israel on October 7, 2023, has impacted me forever, especially as we witness the extreme rise in antisemitism that it fostered. I am heartbroken but defiant. I lived through the turmoil of Vietnam and Watergate, and we survived. Today’s turbulence is worse for me, but once again, I have faith that we will survive it— we must.

As I start to wrap up, I’ll concur with some more of Anne Lamott’s age 70 wisdom.

  • “I know how little I know.” Boy, as I age, I realize that more and more!
  • “I know everything is in flux…so I don’t sweat feeling a little disoriented some days.”
  • “I know that people and pets I adore will keep dying…I know the cycle is life, death, new life.”
  • “Age is just a number when you still know how to shine.”

Looking back on my own 70 years, my main regret is all the times I worried about things that ended up never occurring—so much time wasted. The things that did happen hadn’t occurred to me, but we always managed to get through them. Going forward, my goal is to worry less. Laurie, my ultra-wise wife of 45 years (and truly the rock in our family), always lifts me up with these words: “If it happens, we’ll figure it out.” 

I’ll close with words from a poem, “The Valuable Time of Maturity,” sent to me by my law school “Canoe Brother,” Bill Parrish:

               I feel like the boy that got a bowl of cherries —

               At first, he gobbed them,

               But when he realized there were only a few left,

               He began to taste them intensely…

               I do not intend to waste any of the remaining cherries.

As Marvin Blum turns 70 this week, it’s a time for serious introspection and reflection.

On Turning 70 Read More »

August is “National Make-a-Will Month”—But You Need More! 

As last week’s post highlights, a Will is only one component of an estate plan. A proper estate plan also manages your affairs during incapacity, protects assets from creditors and divorce, provides business succession planning, and creates a lasting family legacy. Although August is “National Make-a-Will Month,” I urge all to broaden their thinking beyond just having a Will.

Of course, I don’t mean to minimize the importance of having a Will. Indeed, the statistics may shock you. More than half of Americans die without a Will. News stories abound of celebrities like Prince who died intestate, sparking years of legal battles among heirs (or those claiming to be an heir). Research shows that 73% of those who die in Texas each year die without a Will.

A Will not only addresses who inherits your assets, but it also designates an Executor to oversee the process. In Texas, if you use the term “Independent Executor,” the Executor can act free from court control, greatly simplifying the probate process.

A Will can also designate who will serve as guardian of your minor children, arguably the most important provision of an estate plan. It’s also an opportunity to make bequests to loved ones and charitable causes dear to you.

But don’t stop with just a Will. For many, the greater portion of their estate consists of retirement plans, life insurance, and assets in “pay-on-death” or “survivorship” accounts. In just 12 years since 2010, assets in workplace retirement accounts ballooned from $2.8 trillion to $6.8 trillion. These assets don’t pass under a Will. They pass according to a Beneficiary Designation. You can have a perfect Will, but if your Beneficiary Designations are out-of-date, your plans are thwarted.

Every year, we are privy to horror stories of outdated beneficiary designations. Here’s one reported by Ashlea Ebeling, “His Ex is Getting His $1 Million Retirement Account. They Broke Up in 1989.” (Wall Street Journal, June 8, 2024).

Ebeling tells the story of Jeffrey Rolison who dated Margaret Sjostedt in their early 20’s, but soon broke up. While dating Margaret, Jeffrey named her when filling out the beneficiary card for his Procter & Gamble retirement plan. Now almost 40 years later, Jeffrey’s $1.15 million retirement goes to his long-ago ex-girlfriend. Jeffrey’s only other assets are a $66,000 home, some used cars, and two cats.

Jeffrey’s two surviving brothers went to court arguing “it wasn’t fair.” Too bad, says the court. “The form is the form.” Ebeling warns: “The battle over Rolison’s money is a stark reminder that the beneficiary forms on retirement accounts, life-insurance policies, and bank accounts matter. In most cases, they trump the Will even if they were filled out decades prior.”

So as August approaches with its focus on making a Will, be sure all the other aspects of your estate plan are current—especially your beneficiary designation forms!

Photo: Jeffrey Rolison’s outdated beneficiary designation form leaves his $1.15 million retirement to a “cohabitor” Margaret who broke up with him 35 years ago. Lucky Margaret!

August is “National Make-a-Will Month”—But You Need More!  Read More »

On a Scale of 1-10, How’s Your Estate Plan?

I once conducted a workshop on estate planning, and at the end, the moderator asked each attendee, “On a scale of 1-10, how’s your estate plan?” I had just explained that there’s so much more to an estate plan than just having a Will. As described below, a Will is just one component. As the room of participants gave honest answers (most of whom answered a 5 or below), it was my turn to answer. The room expected me to say “10.” When I answered “7,” the shock was palpable.

Why did I grade my estate plan a 7? I had a good Will and basic estate planning documents. But I had been listening to my own words that day and realized I had fallen short on some of the more sophisticated aspects of an estate plan.

My true confession was a harsh wake-up call for me. It was time for this cobbler to fly home and take care of my own shoes. And that’s what I did. I could then proudly answer, “My estate plan is a 10!”

However, I realize that over time, I’ve slipped back to an 8 or 9. The thing about estate planning is that you can never put it away and think “I’m all set.” Things change over time: your family, your assets, the law. To remain a “10,” an estate plan has to be regularly reviewed and updated.

For years, our rule of thumb at The Blum Firm has been to review your estate plan every four years, or sooner if changes necessitate. We conveniently tie it to presidential election years, as that’s an easy reminder. Well, here we are in just such a year. November is just around the corner.

If you need more persuasion, August happens to be “National Make-A-Will Month.” As August is now only days away, I hope that’s extra motivation to not only have a Will, but to update your overall estate plan.

To elaborate on my above assertion that an estate plan is more than a Will, here’s a slide from my workshop:

After conducting a workshop on estate planning, Marvin Blum shockingly graded his own plan a “7 out of 10.” Within weeks, Blum brought it up to a 10.

On a Scale of 1-10, How’s Your Estate Plan? Read More »

I’m a Graduate of Blum’s Café School of Hard Knocks

My son Adam is a voracious reader. He regularly feeds me fascinating stories that inspire many of my weekly blog posts. Such is the case today with Beth DeCarbo’s family business piece “My Mom and Dad Owned Competing Side-by-Side Hardware Stores. It Was a Lesson in Life,” (Wall Street Journal, May 8, 2024). It’s a fascinating account of a daughter growing up working in her family’s hardware stores.

Upon first reading it, I didn’t grasp its application to me. Then, it hit me. I also learned “lessons in life” growing up working at Blum’s Café. It was far from glamorous, but it instilled in me a work ethic that serves me well to this day.

My father, Julius Blum, had a hard-knocks upbringing, raised behind his family’s small neighborhood grocery store in an impoverished area of Fort Worth. He was the son of immigrant parents who barely escaped Hitler. Though living in America, they were never “Americanized,” speaking only Yiddish and associating only with other similar immigrant families. Miraculously, my dad (with the help of his older brother Sol) rose from that world and became the first college-educated member of the family. Though my brother and I were Longhorns, we respected our dad’s affection for Texas A&M. He was a proud Aggie with a degree in Mechanical Engineering.

As a newlywed with my mom Elsie, Julius put his degree to use working for Almar-York Air Conditioning. That didn’t last long. As seems to be in our DNA, my dad wanted to be his own boss. Julius used to say he’d rather own a lemonade stand than work for someone else. He took it one notch up and instead opened Blum’s Café, an industrial restaurant in Fort Worth’s meat packing district.

Julius awoke every day at 4:15 a.m. in order to open for business at 5:00. You have to start early to fire up the oven and griddle and get the coffee going. Any day we weren’t in school, my brother and I were right there with our mom and dad. That’s where we spent our summer and Christmas breaks. The days started early and ended late, loading the soda water cases before we could head home, tired and hot. There was no air conditioning.

Like DeCarbo’s article reports, I learned a lot of life lessons growing up in a family business. Here’s a sampling. 

  • My dad never complained. Though the work was hard, he was grateful we made a good living.
  • Julius treated every customer with the same dignity and respect. Upon buying the café, he terminated the prior practice of segregation where white customers ate in the front and black customers ate in the back. He brought everyone together. I noticed.
  • Though he worked hard seven days a week, my dad found time to volunteer at our synagogue, proudly serving as an officer as well as cooking all the synagogue dinners. His example taught me that you have to give back.
  • I learned to be self-reliant. Two of my dad’s favorite sayings were:

“If you take care of your business, it will take care of you.”

“The only helping hand you need is the one at the end of your arm.”

  • I interacted with all walks of life, gaining an openness and awareness different from all my friends who never engaged with folks like packing house workers. I learned to see the value in every person.

My upbringing at Blum’s Café has certainly influenced who I am today. It generated enormous gratitude I have for my law firm. It informs the second prong of the Blum Family Mission Statement: We embrace productive work, waking up each day to engage in meaningful activity. I am grateful this work ethic is equally embraced by my children Adam and Lizzy.

Along these lines, Laurie recently asked our handyman Don for a referral to a washing machine repairman. It was 7:30 a.m., and she asked Don, “Can I text him now, or do I need to wait?” Don’s reply was choice: “Text him now. Successful people are awake by now.”

To sum this up, my heritage of hard work gave me a unique connection to the comments by comedian Jerry Seinfeld in his recent commencement address at Duke. His number one piece of advice to the graduates was “Work hard.” Then he followed it up with words that resonated: “Bust your ass.” I can hear my dad saying that to me now. 

First photo: Marvin Blum grew up working at Blum’s Café, an industrial restaurant in the stockyards. It wasn’t glamorous, but it provided important lessons in life. Second photo: A young Julius Blum (Marvin Blum’s father) who set an example for a strong work ethic and a positive attitude.

I’m a Graduate of Blum’s Café School of Hard Knocks Read More »

The Blum Firm’s Approach to Saving Taxes

I often describe The Blum Firm as taking a “head & heart” approach to tax and estate planning. Most of my weekly blog posts veer more to the heart side, focusing on how to create and pass down a meaningful family legacy. Today’s post shifts more to the head side, describing The Blum Firm’s approach to helping our clients save tax. For the first 35 years of my career, saving tax was almost my only focus. Over the last decade, we’ve expanded our focus to help families create a thoughtful inheritance and pass it down to heirs who are prepared to receive it—not just preparing the money for the family, but also preparing the family for the money. The two work hand-in-hand.

Tax planning is still an important part of that equation. Let me give you a couple of real-life examples that illustrate our approach to helping clients save tax.

  • The new director of a family office insisted that the family get a second opinion on their estate plan. The family resisted, as they had been working with a reputable law firm for decades and were convinced they were “all set.” The family office director persisted, and they hired The Blum Firm to review the plan. To the family’s amazement, we discovered numerous missed planning opportunities. The family hired us to implement a series of transfers to trusts, including a sale to a grantor trust in exchange for a note, a sale to a grantor trust in exchange for a private annuity, and a charitable lead trust. When the matriarch died about two years later, the IRS audited the estate and upheld the planning we did. The director of the family office did the math: our planning saved the family approximately $1 billion in estate tax.

 

  • An elderly matriarch was in hospice care and seeking last-chance planning to help save estate tax.  We informed the family of options, including a private annuity technique that would only be available if she had a greater than 50% chance of surviving a year. Although not a tool that was initially available to her, she remarkably rallied (even booked a vacation) and we instantly implemented it. Several months later, she fell and soon thereafter died. The IRS initially challenged the plan because she didn’t live a full year after doing it. We defended the estate by asserting that the test was not whether she actually lived a year, but whether at the time of the transaction, she had a likelihood of living a year. The IRS later offered to settle the case by accepting 20% of the amount of the tax, saving the family 80% of the tax they would’ve owed had they not planned. The family saved millions of dollars and never had to go to court or talk to the IRS.

These are just two examples of many such cases, but they give a flavor of our approach to planning. We only propose techniques that are supported solidly under the law. We disclose everything to the IRS on gift tax returns, activating a statute of limitations that gives the IRS a three-to-six-year time frame to assert gift tax. In all my 46 years of practicing law this way, other than the one 20% concession described above (which was a big win for the family), The Blum Firm has never had to make a concession to the IRS, other than valuation adjustments. That track record is very important to us.

In addition to work to save estate taxes, we are equally committed to helping clients save income taxes. Saving income tax is harder because there are fewer tools in our toolbox, but we have devised multiple strategies to save income tax. I recently spoke to the Midland-Odessa Business & Estate Council on “Creative Income Tax Strategies.” Click this LINK to see the PowerPoint from that speech.

Some of the tools in my speech take advantage of opportunities in the law to avoid income tax, such as Roth IRAs, Qualified Small Business Stock (“QSBS”), and Private Placement Life Insurance. Other tools, such as Mixing Bowl Partnerships and Upstream Basis Planning achieve a free basis step-up on assets (and unlike the normal basis step-up, you don’t have to die to achieve it). Others achieve a tax deferral, such as Charitable Remainder Trusts and Installment Sales (where I illustrated a way to achieve a 23-year tax deferral). We have designed ways for people (who might think they aren’t a fit) to qualify for these tools and save substantial amounts of income tax. For example, if you expect to sell a business five or more years from now and your ownership interest isn’t currently structured as QSBS, there are multiple ways to convert into QSBS and avoid tax on $10 million (or far more) of the gain. And if you do own QSBS and are about to sell your business, consider gifting stock to non-grantor trusts so that in addition to avoiding tax on $10 million of gain on the stock you own, each trust can also avoid tax on $10 million of gain. 

This type of planning isn’t as simple as going through a simple checklist of tools. It requires a case-by-case analysis, reviewing your assets and entity structure to explore the many possibilities. One more word to the wise: we can do more to help when the call we receive is in future tense, discussing an asset you are planning to sell or planning to acquire, rather than a past tense call about something you already did. It’s never too late, but the earlier in the timeline you start, the more opportunity we have to help.

Marvin Blum was honored to speak on "Creative Income Tax Strategies" at the Midland-Odessa Business & Estate Council.

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Annette’s Legacy Letter: A Priceless Inheritance

I recently posted a Legacy Letter I wrote to my new granddaughter, Mia. My message to Mia was about the family heritage she inherits and will pass down to future generations. On her father’s side, Mia descends from ancestors who barely escaped the Holocaust. On her mother’s side, Mia is the great-granddaughter of Holocaust survivors who miraculously survived imprisonment in concentration camps. It’s a powerful legacy, and one shared by most American Jews.

That post generated a heart-heavy response. One response was so meaningful that I want to devote this post to it. It came from Ben Friedman, a young attorney friend I met years ago at synagogue services in New York. Ben shared the Holocaust survival story of his grandmother, Annette Baslaw Finger, and the Legacy Letter she left to her son, David.

Before I share Annette’s letter, I want to bring her to life by revealing her story. Annette was born in Paris in the late 1920s. Her family fled from the Nazis and Annette survived the Holocaust by hiding in a barn. At Chanukah, they looked to the stars to light an imaginary “Menorah in the Sky” (commemorated in a piece Annette provided to The Reader’s Digest.) Her picture also graces the cover of The Hidden Children by Jane Marks.

Like so many Holocaust survivors, Annette was a model of resilience. Though Hitler tried, he failed to snuff out her life or her light. Annette lived a life as a deeply spiritual Jew, producing heirs like her grandson Ben, who carry on her Jewish heritage. As further proof of her resilience, Annette went on to earn her PhD.

As she grew older, Annette wisely asked her family what items they wanted from her when she passed. Her son David asked for nothing material. All her son wanted from Annette was a moral legacy, which she beautifully composed in 2010. At her funeral 12 years later, David read his mother’s Legacy Letter. I urge you to click on this LINK to read every precious word, but here are a few abbreviated highlights:

“Dearest David,

The only thing you asked for was that I leave you a “moral legacy,” specifically a list of things that have worked for me in my life. You will feel those blessings, and you will continue to feel my presence in your heart. So here is my list:

  1. The gift of gratitude (Stop, look, cherish, and send up a prayer of gratitude. I never go to sleep without first offering a prayer of gratitude.)
  2. My father’s precious memory bottle (Simple moments that bring total happiness – I preserve them in my memory bottle so that I can relive them whenever I feel the need.)
  3. My father’s other precious gifts (The Menorah in the Sky, the pebble in the lake – do at least one small good deed every day which will hopefully reverberate.)
  4. Relish being alive (Every single day, experience something that you really enjoy – music, a friend, a walk in a beautiful place.)
  5. The gift of forgiveness (the anger and resentment are really bad for me. Ask myself ‘honestly, 10 years from now what importance will this have?’ I need to let it go.)
  6. Respecting HaShem’s [G-d’s] gifts and loans (HaShem gave this miraculous body – take proper care of it.)
  7. Feel HaShem’s presence within us and within every human being He has created (Lead honest, ethical, and moral lives – treat others with respect.)
  8. The gift of choice (Stay away from people who make us feel diminished, sad, depressed, or angry.)
  9. The gift of open communication (Almost any problem can be solved when I honestly and respectfully talk about what is bothering me.)
  10. Self appreciation (HaShem created us as imperfect human beings – concentrate on what is good within us, others, and the world.)

These have worked for me. I hope they will for you and I add for others.

All my love!

Mom”

My thanks to Ben for giving me permission to post your grandmother’s beautiful Legacy Letter. It’s truly the most valuable gift and one that will keep on giving. May we all be inspired to follow Annette’s lead and leave our heirs an inheritance from the heart.

Pictured on the cover of The Hidden Children is Annette Baslaw Finger, a Holocaust survivor who left her family the priceless inheritance of a Legacy Letter.

Annette’s Legacy Letter: A Priceless Inheritance Read More »

Family Matters: Farewell, Dear Linda

It’s been a traumatic week for my family. My wife Laurie has three sisters. The oldest, Linda, collapsed while walking into work, completely out-of-the-blue. A blood clot traveled from her leg into her lung, depriving her brain of oxygen. By the time paramedics restored her pulse, too many minutes passed. Her brain activity went from 100 to zero and it was too late to bring her back. We lost our sister Linda this week.

My mind fills with so many lessons from Linda’s life. I’ll share a few.

  • Linda was a vibrant 78-years-young ball of energy. [I used to think 78 was old. I don’t anymore.] She was fully engaged with her work, family, travel, and multiple interests. Linda is a role model for my motto to “Never Retire,” literally running her husband’s ophthalmology practice till her last breath. That’s how she would’ve wanted it.
  • The pain of losing Linda is even more intense because we were so close to her, but that closeness generates memories that now help comfort us. As my law school “Canoe Brother” John Peper so wisely told me: “Experience has taught me that the intensity of the pain is in direct proportion to the depth of the relationship each of you has had with her. And the pain is unavoidable, as it is inextricably intertwined with the memories.” It again confirms what is most valuable in my life – my relationships with family and friends and the need to continually cultivate them. May we all live each day fully.
  • I ended last week’s post quoting my longtime client Jane, whose 7-year-old grandson Jack said the best part of their annual family trip was “being with family,” to which Jane responded “Amen” and “Bingo, we hit the jackpot!” The four Kriger sisters and their families live dispersed, but we gather regularly for valuable family time. Our greatest comfort now comes from all of us being with each other only a few weeks ago at a family Bar Mitzvah in St. Louis. We had no idea that would be our last time to all be together. We will forever cherish that time together and the attached photo. Bingo, we hit the jackpot!
  • I was fortunate to marry into the Kriger family over 45 years ago. The family welcomed all four of us husbands and treated us as part of the family from day one. Some families adhere to a “no in-laws” policy as a means of excluding in-laws. This family has a different kind of “no in-laws” policy – we treat each spouse as a full-blown relative, and no one is an “in-law.”
  • So many treasured thoughts fill my mind, but I’ll close with a Kriger family motto decreed by the sisters’ plain-spoken and wise father, Abe Kriger: “No matter what, you all need to get along.” There’s no shortage of strong personalities in this family, but everyone respected Abe’s decree – we all got along. Losing Linda is hard, but we’re grateful that our sorrow isn’t mixed with guilt.

Life is unpredictable. We lost Linda with no warning. I’ll sum up my message by urging us all to live each day to the fullest, love deeply, spend time with family, create meaningful memories, and “no matter what, we all need to get along.”

(To learn a bit more about our dear sister Linda, click on this LINK to read the eulogy I gave at her funeral.)

Rest in peace, precious sister Linda.

(L to R): Marvin & Laurie Blum, Peggy & William Adler, Diane & Barry Wilen, Linda & David Usdan. We lost dear Linda (oldest of the four Kriger sisters) this week, but cling to this memory of our last time together a few weeks ago.

Family Matters: Farewell, Dear Linda Read More »

Let Me Hear an “Amen” and a “Bingo!”

Each week, my 11-year-old granddaughter Stella Savetsky takes to Instagram to post “Stella’s Torah Corner,” teaching thousands her interpretation of that week’s Torah portion. I filled in for her once as a “substitute teacher” and discovered it’s a lot harder than it looks. Stella is truly an old soul whose Torah Corner offers remarkable wisdom. This old Zaidy Marvin certainly learns a lot from her. Often the lesson informs my work as an estate attorney, especially my passion for family legacy planning. Such was the case recently with Parashat Behar, Leviticus 25:1-26:2.

Behar teaches the importance of advance planning, certainly critical to getting your estate in order. How does it do that? The Torah describes the practice of shmita, giving the land a sabbath of rest every seventh year, “allowing the earth to rest and reinvigorate.” (Vanessa Ochs, “Parashat Behar: Advance Planning,” My Jewish Learning, May 25, 2024.) Because there would be no harvest in the seventh year, the Israelites did advance planning to store up reserves from an abundant harvest in year six. Archeologists have discovered sacks, jars, and storage pits as evidence of these preparations.

Ochs ties shmita to the importance of advance planning before death: “These extensive preparations remind me of how advance planning can alleviate the intense burdens of planning for a Jewish funeral and the subsequent mourning period.” My interpretation of Behar goes beyond funeral preparations into the broader realm of estate planning. 

Is your estate in order? Check your documents, bank accounts, and beneficiary designations. Create a “Red File” to give your family a roadmap containing key information and passwords. Follow the advice of one of my TIGER 21 colleagues who advised Bill (a fellow TIGER member) to do a test run of his estate: “Meet with your planning team and answer this question, “What if Bill died today?” Such a test run often reveals the need for updates and tweaks that are too late to correct after you’re gone. 

Take it a step further and heed the advice of Ashlea Ebeling in “Hash Out the Inheritance Now, or Fight Your Family Later,” (Wall Street Journal, April 6, 2024.) With “more than $84 trillion in wealth” to be transferred over the next 25 years, get in front of potential family conflicts. Avoid surprises, especially in blended families, and explain “why things have been put in place a certain way, no matter how uncomfortable they may be….The topics to cover go beyond just dollar amounts, financial advisers said. The discussion can also address caregiving, charity, and educational costs.” Moreover, select the right time and place for the conversation. “Thanksgiving dinner… is not the best choice.”

Ebeling covers one more aspect of advance planning that especially speaks to me. Share the wealth while you’re still alive, especially by creating meaningful family experiences. Take your family on “all-expenses-paid trips… [to create] memories and a family tradition of togetherness.”

I’ll close with a prime example of family bonding recently shared by Jane, a longtime friend and client. After telling me that my recent Legacy Letter to our granddaughter Mia inspired her “to update my ‘legacy letters’ to my children and grandchildren stashed in my End of Life file,” Jane continued: “We just returned from our annual trip—a long weekend at Hyatt Regency’s Lost Pines near Austin. In addition to four G-2’s and seven G-3’s, along with spouses, all nine G-4’s (ages 1-13) joined. When seven-year-old Jack was asked what was his favorite part of the trip, his response was ‘Being with family.’ I didn’t know whether to say ‘Amen’ or ‘Bingo—we hit the jackpot!’”

Jane, your legacy letters and annual family trips are the kind of advance planning that will yield benefits for generations to come. Your family is richly blessed. I would say both “Amen” and “Bingo!”

Marvin Blum’s granddaughter Stella Savetsky teaches “Stella’s Torah Corner” each week, frequently imparting estate planning wisdom through her insightful Torah lessons.

Let Me Hear an “Amen” and a “Bingo!” Read More »

Cinderella Estate Planning: What You Need to Do Before the Clock Strikes Midnight on 12/31/2025

As an estate planning lawyer, one of the favorite hats I wear is to be a teacher. From the early days of my career over 45 years ago, I discovered a passion for educating people about estate planning. It all started when I was a new lawyer and got invited to speak on estate planning for a “Money, Money, Money” seminar sponsored by Fort Worth National Bank. It was a two-hour course, and I was amazed to discover the adrenaline rush it gave me. I tend to get really enthusiastic, ever louder and faster as I get wound up, and even when I try to lower the volume and slow down, it’s a lost cause. My friend Bob Mitchell once affectionately described me as a Baptist preacher (the fire and brimstone variety), and I jokingly redubbed myself a fire and brimstone rabbi.

Over my career, I have enjoyed many opportunities to speak across the country. It was a special honor recently when I got to speak to a hometown crowd, the Tarrant County Probate Bar Association. We have a large and active group of probate attorneys in this area, and it was fun to look out on a sea of friendly and familiar faces. My topic was Estate Planning to Do Before the Clock Strikes Midnight on 12/31/2025. It was a pretty tax-centric presentation, and much of that audience doesn’t want anything to do with a topic that has the word “tax” in it, so I started by going over some basics and getting us all on a level set. I know how they feel, as I feel the same way when they teach me probate litigation topics.

I started by describing this topic as “Cinderella Estate Planning,” because when the clock strikes midnight on 12/31/25, the coach turns back into a pumpkin. You go to bed on New Year’s Eve 2025 with an estate tax exemption of around $14 million, and you wake up on New Year’s morning with an exemption of around $7 million. What planning can we do to lock in the doubled exemption, so we don’t waste half of it? I call this area of our law practice “use it or lose it” planning. The clock is ticking fast. The deadline will be here before we know it.

The sunset date (when the coach reverts to a pumpkin) is part of 2017 Trump tax legislation that cut taxes, but only temporarily. Click on this link for a copy of my PowerPoint to discover estate planning ideas to do before the sunset happens. I’ll summarize briefly to say we’re in the “Golden Age” of Estate Planning. In particular, we can employ “squeeze & freeze” techniques, such as transfers to FLPs, gifts and sales to Grantor Trusts (like a SLAT, DGT, 678 Trust, GRAT, ILIT, CRUT, CLAT, QPRT, etc.), and the one Biden hates the most called stepped-up basis where you “Buy, Borrow, Die” and never pay income tax on your gains. There’s a lot of estate planning you can do over the next year to get in front of the looming sunset date. I also address some challenge areas, such as when a couple wants to only transfer half as much as needed, or when one spouse has wealth and the other doesn’t, or when the bulk of assets are in an IRA, or “use it or lose it” planning for a single person.

Income tax breaks will also go away upon sunset, where the individual top rate will go from 37% to 39.6%, and the corporate income tax rate will go from 21% to 35%. Consider accelerating income into 2025 from 2026 to pay the lower rate. As a silver lining, the SALT cap (limiting the deduction for state and local taxes at $10,000) goes away in 2026, so defer paying large property taxes from 2025 into 2026 to get a tax deduction. Another popular idea is to convert a traditional IRA into a Roth IRA before 2026, so you pay the income tax hit at a lower rate.

Will the sunset date be extended? Every commentator I read is predicting no. The reason is that it is already baked into the law, and for sunset not to happen, Congress would have to pass a new law and the President would have to sign it. That’s a hard thing to pull off in the current legislative environment with record low passage of new laws.

I end with a “Word to the Wise.” Don’t put off the planning. It takes time to design the right strategy for you and put it into effect. Tax lawyers will likely be inundated in 2025, like we were in 2021 when new legislation (that would have shut down most of these tools) came within two votes of passing. Business Insider affirms my prediction that “estate planning will rev up into high gear as the end of the Trump tax cuts approaches.” So please get started early and avoid the crunch. My colleagues and I are pleading with you to get started early.

Marvin Blum was honored to speak to the Tarrant County Probate Bar Association on “Estate Planning to Do Before the Clock Strikes Midnight on 12/31/2025.” 

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Every New Baby Is a Miracle

Last week’s post with my Legacy Letter to my new granddaughter Mia stirred up a moving response. Thanks to all for sharing in my joy.

As an estate planner, I have a special perspective on the significance of grandkids. Providing for your heirs in a meaningful way is usually the driving force behind a thoughtful estate plan. My mission is to help families create responsible inheritors who are prepared to receive the inheritance that will come their way. And by “the inheritance,” I mean not only money, but also the passing down of a family’s heritage. My prayer is that Mia and our other five grandchildren will safeguard the precious legacy bequeathed to us by our ancestors.

A new baby is a miracle from heaven. As I held Mia only moments after her birth and peered into that angelic face, I was overcome with awe at how a new baby comes into the world. Because of our family’s experience with pregnancy loss, I feel even more acutely blessed. When a healthy baby arrives, I don’t take it for granted.

For those readers who are newer to my blog, I’ll share again what Laurie and I experienced. After a perfect full-term pregnancy, we went to the hospital on February 11, 1982, expecting to return home with a newborn child. For unknown reasons, during the delivery, we heard words we’ll never forget: “There’s no heartbeat.” Laurie and I powered through that tragedy and were blessed with another pregnancy a few months later.

About three weeks before the due date, I was at work and my assistant interrupted a meeting to tell me Laurie was in labor. How could that be? There had been no sign of contractions earlier. We rushed to the hospital, and on February 11, 1983 (one year to the day after our loss), Adam was born. I am convinced there was divine intervention.

Our daughter Lizzy’s first-born came into the world in an emergency delivery after being under stress. It was a déjà vu horrifying experience, but thankfully ended with a healthy (though premature) Stella. Lizzy’s second pregnancy produced Juliet, this time an easy delivery but no less a miracle.

Years later, Lizzy went through a calendar year with three miscarriages (two of which were ectopic and life-threatening). But Lizzy and Ira held onto their faith and decided to try once more. The pregnancy started out a disaster, as we were informed Lizzy had once again miscarried. Days later, at a doctor appointment, Lizzy heard words she will never forget: “There’s a heartbeat.” About eight months later, Ollie was born—another miracle.

Lizzy uses her experience to help others struggling with pregnancy difficulties. She founded the “Real Love, Real Loss” movement to acknowledge the unborn souls of lost pregnancies and provide support and comfort to suffering families. She raised funds to donate a Torah to the Israeli Defense Forces, which they carry with them into battle this very day. Lizzy’s message to the troops in giving the Torah was that each letter represents an unborn soul who is looking out over our soldiers and protecting them.

Perhaps now you see why I regard each healthy newborn as a miracle. I am one very, very grateful Zaidy.

A final word to answer questions about my choice to be called Zaidy, the Yiddish word for grandfather. As explained last week, it’s a tribute to my Zaidy Eliezer. The female counterpart is Bubbie, but Laurie couldn’t relate to the stereotype of that visual image, so she chose “Mimi” instead. I once heard a joke that the word Zaidy means “shrinking man,” which certainly applies to me as my shirt size has gone from XL to L to M to S. And finally, there are lots of ways to spell it in English, but I chose my spelling in honor of Zaidy’s Deli, our favorite Denver restaurant, and its terrific owner and friend Gerard Rudofsky.

(1) Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky with husband Ira and three miracle children dedicating a Torah in Israel as the scribe inks in the final letters. Each letter commemorates an unborn soul from a pregnancy loss. (2) Lizzy and Ira Savetsky rejoicing with Israeli Defense Forces who carry that Torah with them into battle, to be protected by each of those unborn souls.

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A Message to Mia, My New Granddaughter

I’ve been writing this weekly blog for 2 ½ years, and the best feedback I get comes when I share personal stories from my heart. That’s what I’m doing today, as I share with the world a message to my new granddaughter Mia, born one week ago today.

When it comes to legacy planning, the most powerful action is to pass down not just valuables, but (more importantly), our values. One way to do that is to write a legacy letter to your heirs sharing what’s in your heart. Sometimes also called an “ethical will,” these legacy letters convey messages not found in your formal estate planning documents. So, here goes.

Dear Mia,
I am your very proud and grateful Zaidy (that’s Yiddish for grandfather). Your birth created a new link in the chain of our family’s heritage, an unbroken chain that goes all the way back to Moses on Mount Sinai.

To understand the significance of that unbroken chain, I want to share the story of one of your ancestors who was also called Zaidy—my great grandfather Eliezer Weinstock. When the time came for me to select the name for you grandkids to call me, I chose the name “Zaidy” as a tribute to Zaidy Eliezer’s legacy.

Zaidy Eliezer and his wife Leah lived in a village in Eastern Europe called Polona in what is now Ukraine. To understand what their life was like, you should go see the show “Fiddler on the Roof.” They were observant Jews, deeply committed to faith and family. They had six kids: Elke, Enoch, Yosef (Joe), Rachel, Pauline (my grandmother), and Morris. Life was a very difficult struggle, as the czar would create periodic pogroms to rough up the Jews in their village. In one pogrom, they poked out one of Zaidy Eliezer’s eyes. It got so bad that their son Joe courageously immigrated to America, all alone as a young boy, seeking a better life.

When Uncle Joe arrived in America, his ship was diverted from Ellis Island to Galveston, Texas, as part of the “Galveston Movement” to alleviate overcrowding of Jewish immigrants in New York. The Jewish Welfare met Uncle Joe at the dock and placed him in Montgomery, Alabama, quite a culture shock for a religious Jewish boy who didn’t know a word of English and didn’t have a penny in his pocket.

Uncle Joe pushed a fruit cart door-to-door saving his pennies until he could bring over his family to America. While raising the funds, World War I broke out shutting down immigration. When the war ended, Uncle Joe was able to obtain a family visa for his parents and three younger siblings. His older siblings Elke and Enoch were married by that point and couldn’t be included on the same visa.

Eliezer, Leah, and three of their children made the journey to join their son Joe on the other side of the world. Elke and Enoch remained behind in Europe. Eliezer’s daughter Pauline married Meyer Oberstein and made a home for her parents and their four children, including my mother, Elsie. Elsie shared a bed with her grandmother Leah, who prayed every night that Elke and Enoch were still alive. Alas, that was not the case. Hitler captured them, and Elke and Enoch were murdered in the Holocaust.

Through all these trials and tribulations, Eliezer held on tightly to his Jewish faith. Against all odds, he remained a religious Orthodox Jew in Montgomery, Alabama. He even refused to eat meat in America, not trusting that it was properly kosher.

Eliezer studied Torah every day. Leaving behind all his possessions in Europe, he advocated learning and used to say: “What you put into your mind, no one can ever take away from you.” That became one of my mottos in life, as I’ve always put a high value on being a lifelong learner. I trust you will too.

Eliezer never learned English, speaking only Yiddish at home with his family. When my grandfather Meyer took Eliezer to court to become a U.S. citizen, the judge waived the requirement for him to pass a test in English, saying to him: “Rabbi Weinstock, with all you’ve been through, it’s my honor to declare you a U.S. citizen.”

Zaidy died soon after I was born, but he lived long enough to witness the birth of great-grandchildren. As another relative so powerfully said, seeing the birth of that fourth generation proved to Zaidy that “we beat Hitler.” The Nazi’s mission was to wipe out all the world’s Jews, but we’re still here, standing strong and proud of our Jewish identity.

We are once again living in turbulent times for Jews. As we read each Passover: “In every generation they rise up against us to destroy us, and the Holy One, Blessed be He, rescues us from their hands.” Mia, your birth proves once again that we will prevail against the forces of evil who may try to destroy us, but we will survive and thrive. When adversity strikes, know that you come from ancestors like Zaidy Eliezer Weinstock who overcame great obstacles and were resilient. As we always say in our family, “You come from good stock—WEINSTOCK!”

Mia, my prayer for you is that you live a meaningful life, inspired by the precious legacy that Zaidy Eliezer passed down to us. And may you, like our ancestors before us, continue to pass down this heritage “l’dor vador, from generation to generation.”

Your loving Zaidy,
Marvin E. Blum

(1) “Zaidy” Marvin Blum welcomes granddaughter Mia to the world, just moments after her birth. (2) The original “Zaidy” in the family, Eliezer Weinstock, survived persecution in Ukraine, though one eye was poked out in a pogrom. Marvin Blum is grateful to now be “Zaidy” to six wonderful grandkids who will carry on the Weinstock family heritage.

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More on Buffett: Dr. Ruth’s Gift That Keeps on Giving

As I reported last week, I missed being part of the Omaha crowd at this year’s Berkshire Hathaway annual meeting. But there was a very important guest of honor in that crowd who was seated on the front row, a true role model who deserves our recognition. It was Dr. Ruth Gottesman, who recently donated $1 billion to the Albert Einstein College of Medicine. Dr. Ruth’s gift is likely the largest ever made to a medical school, according to Joseph Goldstein’s New York Times article of Feb. 26, 2024, “$1 Billion Donation Will Provide Free Tuition at a Bronx Medical School.”

The donor is the 93-year-old widow of Wall Street financier Sandy Gottesman, a close colleague of Warren Buffett who made an early investment in Berkshire Hathaway. According to Dr. Ruth, Sandy died in 2022 at age 96, leaving her a powerful opportunity. “He left me, unbeknownst to me, a whole portfolio of Berkshire Hathaway stock, she recalled. The instructions were simple: ‘Do whatever you think is right with it.’”

Dr. Ruth seized that opportunity to make a difference in the world, and by doing so created a meaningful family legacy. “She realized immediately what she wanted to do, she recalled. ‘I wanted to fund students at Einstein so they could receive free tuition,’ she said. There was enough money to do that in perpetuity.” Dr. Ruth, a former professor at Einstein, was director of psychoeducational services and is current chair of the Board of Trustees.

When Dr. Ruth approached the head of the medical college Dr. Philip Ozuah, she asked this provocative question: “If someone said, ‘I’ll give you a transformative gift for the medical school,’ what would you do?” He answered there were three things: “One, he began, you could have education be free—.” She stopped him there. “That’s what I want to do,” she said. He never mentioned the other ideas.”

In unsurprising humility, Dr. Ruth didn’t want any recognition or publicity. Dr. Ozuah convinced her otherwise, as attaching her name to the gift might inspire others. She relented, but on the condition that the Einstein College of Medicine not change its name. “The name, she noted, could not be beat. ‘We’ve got the gosh darn name – we’ve got Albert Einstein.’”

Einstein’s student body is about 60% women. The racial composition is diverse: about 29% Asian, 11% Hispanic, and 5% Black. When the students assembled for a recent mandatory meeting, they had no idea why. “The future doctors screamed, jumped out of their seats, and cried when Gottesman made her announcement,” per Ben Cohen and Karen Langley’s article, “The Friendship with Warren Buffett that Led to Her $1 Billion Donation” (Wall Street Journal, March 1, 2024).

The Gottesman family credits Buffett’s Berkshire success with enabling them to make charitable gifts “that have brought joy to the whole family.” Buffett deflects the praise: “I’ve never seen anybody behave better with a billion dollars…. She could change all these people’s lives by giving up something that wasn’t actually important to her and would be hugely important to thousands of people over time.”

One of the most fulfilling aspects of my career as an estate planning lawyer is to help clients achieve their philanthropic goals. It is richly rewarding to help families create charitable structures that provide a true “win-win,” blessing not only the recipient of the gifts, but also providing the donor family with meaningful benefits. Those who give discover the fulfillment that comes from giving to others. Moreover, as the family comes together to make philanthropic decisions, that process brings another “win,” generating powerful family glue to help bond heirs together.

The seeds for philanthropy can be planted into children at a young age. Dr. Ruth attests, raised by parents who set an example with not only gifts of money, but also good deeds. “Philanthropy was in Ruth’s blood…. One of the formative moments of Ruth’s life came when she was around 10 years old and her family took in another 10-year-old girl fleeing Nazi Germany during World War II. ‘She never said goodbye to her parents, and she didn’t know whether they would be alive after the war,’ Ruth Gottesman once said. ‘That began a process of seeing others and feeling their pain.’”

Dr. Ruth’s story certainly inspires me. I’m with Warren Buffett—look at all the good she’s doing that will continue forever. Few can give in the magnitude that Dr. Ruth did, but with whatever we have, we can make a difference in others’ lives. And the bonus is that by doing so, we set an example for the next generations to follow. The Blum Firm welcomes the opportunity to help you explore charitable structures that are right for your family.

Dr. Ruth Gottesman (pictured with husband Sandy) is a role model for philanthropy, using their Berkshire fortune to make a $1 billion gift to endow free tuition at Einstein Medical School, truly a gift that will keep on giving.

 

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Wisdom from Warren: You Can’t Wind the Clock Back

My son Adam’s wife is expecting a baby any day now, so we made the decision to stay close to home and miss this year’s Berkshire-Hathaway annual meeting. In past Blum family excursions to the “Woodstock for Capitalists,” I was honored three times to ask questions of Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger. My first was about their estate plans; my second was about their philanthropy; and my third was their advice for preparing heirs. Although I missed my chance to ask a fourth question this year, I couldn’t have topped the best question of the day. Like so much surprise wisdom that comes “out of the mouths of babes,” the question came from a kid: “If you had one more day with Charlie, what would you do with him?” Like everyone following the Q & A session that day, I was on the edge of my chair eager to hear Warren’s answer. He didn’t disappoint.

My mission in writing this weekly blog is to impart estate planning lessons from the head and the heart. Buffett’s answer was chock full of legacy planning advice. Even though we missed hearing how Charlie might have punctuated Warren’s answer with one of his famous one-liners, we can still hear those clever witticisms in our imagination. Charlie lives on in our minds and hearts.

Buffett reflected on his longtime close friendship with Charlie Munger, who “lived to 99.9 years” and died suddenly and peacefully last November 28, just 33 days before his 100th birthday. Warren joked that Charlie wouldn’t have wanted to know it was his last day, recalling Charlie’s quip: “Just tell me where I’m going to die, so I’ll never go there.” He just lived every day to the fullest, and he did it with vigor and humor. That’s lesson number one.

Lesson two: Warren has no regrets. He can’t wind the clock back and have one more day with Charlie, but he wouldn’t need to. “In effect, I did have one more day. We always lived in a way where we were happy with what we were doing every day.” The message is to treat every time with your loved ones as if it were your last time with them. “If I’d have had another day with him, we’d have done the same thing we were doing on all the other days…. I can’t remember any time that he was mad at me, or I was mad at him.”

How did they spend those days together? That brings us to lesson three: their time together was enriching and productive. “We did keep learning, and we liked learning together.” As the years went by, they expanded their learning even more, because they made more mistakes and they learned from each of those mistakes. “We had as much fun, perhaps even more to some extent, with things that failed, because we really had to work our way out of them. And in a sense, there’s more fun having somebody that’s your partner in digging your way out of a foxhole than just sitting there and watching an idea that you got 10 years ago just continually produce more and more profits.” In this year’s annual letter to shareholders, Buffett humbly takes the blame for many of those mistakes, acknowledging that Munger “jerked me back to sanity when my old habits surfaced…. In reality, Charlie was the ‘architect’ of the present Berkshire, and I acted as the ‘general contractor’ to carry out the day-to-day construction of his vision.” Bottom line: embrace challenges and work with a partner to dig out of them.

Lesson four: As you age, stay interested and interesting. “He was not only interested in the world at 99, but the world was interested in him. I’d never seen anybody that was peaking at 99…. They all wanted to meet Charlie, and Charlie was happy to talk with them…. The world was still a very interesting place to us when he got to be 99 and I got to be 93.” Keep actively engaged with life. “What you should probably ask yourself is who do you feel that you’d want to start spending the last day of your life with? And then figure out a way to start meeting them, or tomorrow, and meet with them as often as you can, because why wait till the last day? And don’t bother with the others.” If you can’t meet them in person, read about them. Charlie was such a voracious reader that he felt he’d actually met the people he read so much about, including his favorite Ben Franklin.

Final lesson: live life the way you want to. That’s what Charlie Munger did, even down to the fact he “never did a day of exercise.” I don’t condone that, but hey, who am I to say? Charlie drank sodas, ate candy, never exercised, and lived to 99.9!

At last year’s meeting which occurred on the day of King Charles’ coronation, Warren dubbed Charlie as Berkshire’s King Charles. Even after he’s gone, we’re still learning lessons from our own King Charles. Rest in peace, Charlie Munger.

The most profound question for Warren Buffett came from this kid: “If you had one more day with Charlie, what would you do with him?”

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Learn How to Be a Better Leader: Talmage Boston’s “How the Best Did It”

Heroes provide an important guiding light to help us live a fulfilling life and build a meaningful legacy. They inspire us and stretch us to be better. I am blessed with such a hero—it’s my best friend Talmage Boston, my law school roommate going back almost 50 years now. In my post of June 7, 2022, I explained how Talmage’s example and encouragement gave me the confidence to expand my horizons. Talmage’s leadership skills became a lesson in leadership for me. Now Talmage has written a book on this very topic. In How the Best Did It, Talmage Boston examines 24 leadership skills of our eight best Presidents and shows how we can apply the traits of those heroes to become better leaders in our own lives.

We are in the midst of a down and dirty Presidential campaign that has many of us longing for the days of exemplary Presidential leadership. Talmage restores hope that we’ve had that kind of leadership before, and by learning from their greatness, we can once again achieve greatness. Beyond following their example to become a great President, Talmage shows us how to apply the lessons of history to become a better leader in any field, be it business, government, academia, non-profit, or volunteerism. Each of the eight chapters ends with a mini workbook that serves as a practical checklist to assess: How am I doing? How can I improve? Speaking from personal experience, Talmage’s book is helping me become a better managing partner of my law firm.

Who made Talmage’s Top Eight? It’s the four on Mount Rushmore (Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, and Teddy Roosevelt), plus four more since then: Franklin Roosevelt, Eisenhower, Kennedy, and Reagan. Talmage defends his selections by highlighting each one’s formula for effective and ethical leadership. Though each brings unique skills, there are three traits held in common by all eight featured Presidents. First, they were self-aware, recognizing any gaps in their toolkit and filling that void by teaming up with those who could enhance them where they had some weakness. Second, each was a great persuader who could bring the country around, though some did it through eloquent oratory prowess (Lincoln, FDR, JFK, and Reagan) and others did it more one-on-one (Washington, Jefferson, TR, and Ike). Third, all eight prioritized appealing to the American middle (where the majority of us reside) and resisted pressure from the far left and far right extremes.

One of the most fascinating aspects of the book for me is that Talmage not only reveals each one’s strengths; he also candidly discloses each one’s flaws. No leader is perfect. By pulling back the curtain on their weaknesses, we realize that we too can overcome our own deficiencies and rise to greatness. For example, Washington was a slave owner who saw the light and revised his Will to free his slaves upon his death. Jefferson was painfully shy and a lackluster speaker (giving only two speeches in his eight years—his first and second inaugural addresses), yet he was a master at hosting small dinner gatherings to break down barriers with his Federalist adversaries. Lincoln’s wife Mary was a notoriously difficult woman, but Lincoln powered through his difficult marriage and stayed focused on winning the Civil War and reuniting the country. FDR could’ve succumbed to his polio paralysis at age 39, but steadfastly refused to let it dampen his confidence. Reagan overcame his deficient upbringing with an undependable alcoholic father, living in suitcases as they moved from one rental home to another, yet emerged with an optimism that was so contagious that he could heal the country from the malaise that pervaded the end of Carter’s presidency.

I won’t give away any more, so go read it for yourself and find out the rest. You’ll enjoy Talmage’s “snap, crackle, pop” writing style and skillful storytelling. Suffice to say How the Best Did It is a masterclass in leadership.

I am a member of TIGER 21, an international peer-to-peer learning organization with monthly group meetings. At the beginning of each meeting, each member contributes to a “Tip Jar” by recommending a book, show, or other tip. I was gratified in my last meeting when a fellow TIGER member’s tip was a glowing recommendation of Talmage’s How the Best Did It. He had no idea of my friendship with Talmage. He was just objectively giving praise. I was also gratified when I sent the book to my longtime friend Bob Schieffer, regarded as one of the greatest American journalists of the 20th and 21st centuries, and, upon reading it, Bob Schieffer declared: “I was just waiting for someone to write this book!” Now that’s some endorsement. So don’t just take my word for it. These assessments, as well as a multitude of other reviews, are declaring Talmage’s book to be stellar.

In writing this weekly estate planning blog, my mission is to help others build a rich legacy that will inspire future generations. We leave behind more than money. Ideally, we bequeath to our heirs an example they can follow to help them live a fulfilling life. Talmage Boston’s How the Best Did It is a roadmap to help us live such an exemplary life and inspire our heirs to likewise become leaders with the skills to carry on our family legacy. One final tip: this book would make a perfect Mother’s Day or Father’s Day gift!

1– Marvin Blum and Talmage Boston, best friends for 49 years (and counting), celebrate Talmage’s sixth book How the Best Did It, lessons in leadership from our eight best Presidents. 2– Book cover for How the Best Did It by Talmage Boston.

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As Campus Protests Rage, Our Kids Face Tough Decisions

To say I am greatly disturbed by the protests on college campuses is an understatement. I grew up in the Vietnam era, so I understand the urge for students to speak out. But when protests turn from being a peaceful demonstration to a call for violence against a group of people (whether it be a call to kill Jews, Blacks, transgenders, or any other marginalized community), it crosses the line from “free speech” to “hate speech,” making the targeted group feel unsafe on campus. In this season of Passover when we celebrate freedom, these kids are robbed of their freedom.

I can’t help but wonder how we got here. Students are easily influenced. Social media and Tik Tok contribute. For every pro-Israel post, there are 50 posts against the Jewish homeland. The anti-Israel propaganda machine has been actively at work for the past 20 years. Unfortunately, much of the hate comes into students’ heads from some professors who have bought into an ideology that vilifies not only Jews, but Western Civilization as a whole. It’s no wonder so many kids are morally confused. I am reminded of a prep-school teacher’s line from the movie The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie: “Give me a girl at an impressionable age, and she will be mine for life.” We’ve all had teachers like Miss Jean Brodie who held that kind of power over our minds.

We’ve been here before. In 1930’s Europe, universities were a hotbed for fomenting antisemitism. The hate started in schools, then moved into cultural institutions, media, businesses, neighborhoods. It led to the murder of two-thirds of Europe’s Jews. Either we learn from history, or we are doomed to repeat it.

I’m grateful that our two kids, Adam and Lizzy, are grown and were never radicalized to hate. But Laurie and I have five young grandkids, and it’s hard not to worry how they will respond when the time comes that they face such temptation. What can we, as parents and grandparents, do to strengthen their core and give our kids the tools to make good decisions?

Laurie and I were recently in Florida to hear our daughter speak at the Annual Summit Countering Antisemitism. Coincidentally, Lizzy asked what we did to raise kids who stayed connected to our faith and identity. We are grateful that Lizzy is a leading advocate for Israel and Judaism, and that Adam was recently appointed by Gov. Abbott to the Texas Holocaust, Genocide, and Antisemitism Advisory Commission. We’re no experts at raising kids, and certainly we didn’t do everything right. No doubt that luck and blessing played heavily into the outcome. But I answered that we were intentional about identifying our core values and actively sharing those values with our kids. We regularly shared stories of our ancestors who miraculously survived Hitler, who faced unimaginable persecution but stayed strong and resilient. We taught our kids they are links in an unbroken chain. They grew up knowing that they belong to a heritage that’s bigger than they are. We did our best to adhere to the line in Ethics of the Fathers, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and even when he is old, he will not depart from it.”

In my role as an estate planning lawyer, I’ve become a major proponent of family meetings. The goal is to create family cohesiveness. Even young children can have a seat at the table and participate in an exercise to identify the family’s values and answer aspirational questions. What is the purpose of our family? What do we care about and stand up for? Who do we come from? These are conversations that should happen early and often. I’ve written a lot about family meetings in this blog. To reiterate, estate planning is about more than money. It’s about passing down not just your valuables, but even more importantly, your values. To get the most from this process, I recommend bringing in a professional to facilitate the meetings, someone who knows how to guide the process.

Obviously, there’s no guarantee that raising kids to know the family’s values and heritage will keep them on track. However, when our kids are faced with the choice of which path to take, there is a moment when they have the power to choose their response. Lizzy recently taught me a powerful lesson from Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning: “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” We cannot control what influences may tempt our kids. But when temptation arises, our kids are in control over how they respond. Let’s raise them with the tools to hopefully make the right choice when that time comes.

It’s never too early to give kids a seat at the table to learn family values and heritage. This photo of Memphis’ Goldsmith family from a century ago brings together family of all ages to honor the legacy of patriarch Jacob Goldsmith, including Marvin Blum’s mother-in-law Aimee as a young girl, seated second on the left.

 

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Fair vs. Equal: Be Ultra-Careful with Unequal Inheritances

One of the thorniest issues in estate planning is the age-old question of fair vs. equal. Should you always split an inheritance equally among your kids, or are there situations where an unequal division may actually be more fair? I’ve covered this topic numerous times before in prior posts, but it always merits reconsideration.

I referred to the work of Family Consultant Jeff Savlov a couple of weeks ago in a post about procrastination. I return to Jeff’s expertise today for the excellent way he addressed this dicey topic in his March 2024 article “Fairness, Once Again.” Like all estate counselors, Jeff recognizes that what may appear unfair may actually be fair once you know the whole context. As Relational Consultant Byron Gossett writes in his book Expand the Frame, you have to look at the big picture before you pass judgment, expanding out from the narrow frame where things may appear to be unfair. Savlov cleverly shows two boys, one with a big piece of cake and the other with a little piece. He then offers three scenarios to explain why this may actually be fair after all. “Fairness is not always a 50/50 split of the assets under consideration.”

Savlov goes on to give a personal example where their older son has a job with great health insurance while the other son is a personal trainer with no health insurance. Savlov and his wife added the younger son to their policy and agreed to pay for his coverage. Aware this could ruffle feathers with their older son, they did the smart thing. They engaged in open communication with their sons, receiving a seal of approval. But when it comes to dividing an inheritance unequally at death, proceed with caution. As Savlov illustrates, parents of a prominent surgeon considered leaving more to the less successful child who didn’t put in the hard work it took for the surgeon to succeed. As I’ve witnessed in my own practice, “The surgeon child, in this example, may not need the parents’ assets, but often feels unfairly treated or even less loved.” There isn’t an obvious right or wrong here, but I recommend Savlov’s approach to have open communication and avoid surprises when it comes time to read the Will.

Here’s a recent case involving the billionaire family of Hubert Neumann that carries the consequences of an unequal inheritance to the extreme. Kelly Crow tells the horror story of the Neumann family in her Wall Street Journal article of Feb. 3, 2024. When their mother Dolores died, the three Neumann daughters discovered a “bombshell.” Dolores left her mega-millions of dollars’ worth of art (including one painting that was “the crown jewel” of the estate) entirely to daughter Belinda. Daughter Melissa (who was independently wealthy) was devastated to learn that her share of the estate was capped at $1 million, which she’d forfeit if she contested the Will. “‘We’re sisters,’ Melissa remembers Belinda saying, reaching over to squeeze her arm. ‘We’ll get through this.’” Easy for Belinda to feel that way, but suffice to say, they didn’t get through it. Things got really ugly after the hurt of that unequal bequest.

Their father Hubert was equally shocked by the unequal division and sided with Melissa. “But in the eight years since his wife’s Will was read, his family has descended into a feud with at least 18 lawsuits exchanged among them…. [Belinda] tried to oust her father as manager of their family’s estimated $1 billion art trust.” It gets worse. Belinda and her father Hubert were sharing a residence when Hubert went to court and got an order to evict her. Belinda’s husband showed up and claimed Hubert “just shoved me into a set of doors,” leading to Hubert’s arrest. Hubert was led out of his own residence in handcuffs and “slept on the cement floor of Manhattan’s 23rd Precinct.”

Melissa and Hubert filed a Will contest, but the court upheld Dolores’ Will. Melissa and Hubert have filed an appeal. In another action, the court denied Belinda’s effort to remove her father as managing trustee. “Melissa mostly goes to art shows alone now, or occasionally with her father. She hasn’t spoken to Belinda in years.” What’s perhaps worse is that the family’s dirty laundry is on display now for the entire world to see. All hope for passing down a meaningful legacy to the next generation is destroyed.

I’ll repeat: unequal inheritances are fraught with risk. If you’re going down that path, proceed with caution!

Unequal inheritances may be “fair,” but they are also highly risky. Be careful to avoid a family feud like the one that erupted in the Neumann family when daughter Melissa (pictured here with father Hubert) received far less from her mother’s Will than sister Belinda.

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Want to Stay Younger? Dance!

I recently revealed a highlight from attending the TIGER 21 annual conference in Arizona, hearing words of wisdom from President Clinton and President Bush. Exciting as that was, it wasn’t the only notable highlight of the conference. Another magic moment came in a session from scientist Marc Milstein, PhD, entitled “Age-Proof Your Brain.”

As an estate planning attorney, my mission is to help clients not only enrich their estates, but also live enriching lives and pass down a meaningful legacy. I learned a lot from Dr. Milstein about how to have a brain that is younger than your age. Here are some tips to have a younger brain and hence a more fruitful life.

  1. Optimize your sleep. Sleep in a pitch-dark room and awaken to morning light, spending at least 10 minutes outside in natural light each morning to reset your brain clock. Avoid sleep aids, because those disrupt your natural brain clock. Your brain releases natural melatonin in the dark, then you wake up when your brain detects natural light in the morning.
  2. Tackle a new challenge as you age. By forcing your brain to learn new things, it exercises your brain and helps cleanse out brain trash. Develop a new hobby outside of your field of expertise. Take up painting (like President Bush), or learn a musical instrument, a foreign language, or a new sport (maybe join the pickle ball craze!).
  3. Keep socially engaged. Resist the temptation to become isolated (a particularly bad side-effect of COVID) and get out. Being in contact with others actually “power washes” your brain. Social engagement fights the impact of our brains shrinking 5% every 10 years, beginning at age 40.
  4. Take care of your body and mind. Treat inflammation diseases, brush your teeth (to combat gingivitis/plaque), eat right (avoid processed foods; go for the dark green stuff and a Mediterranean diet), don’t smoke, manage stress (though a moment of stress can actually be good for the brain, just not too much), breathe (mindfulness exercises to keep us in the moment help reduce harmful cortisol levels).
  5. Get daily exercise. Take the stairs. As I recently promoted in my post on the benefits of taking a walk, take a walk. Per Dr. Milstein, walk for 30-40 minutes a day, and ideally during that time, increase your heart rate for 6-8 minutes. An especially good time to take a walk is after you eat, so any sugar you consume will be a lot less toxic.

Now here’s the bonus tip: the best exercise of all is… DANCING! Why, you may ask? Because it combines the best of active movement, socialization, and forcing your brain to learn something new. Lee Ann Womack sang “I Hope You Dance,” one of my favorite tunes, so let’s follow this advice from both her and Dr. Milstein.

One more thing: following these tips can also help us ward off dementia. Per Dr. Milstein, 95-99% of Alzheimer’s isn’t genetic; it’s more affected by our lifestyle. I recently read about Vernon Smith, a very busy 97-year-old economist in Dominique Mosbergen’s article “How to Stay Mentally Sharp into Your 80s and Beyond” (Wall Street Journal, Feb. 15, 2024). Smith works eight hours a day, seven days a week, just finished writing a book on Adam Smith, and regularly goes to concerts with his daughter. He’s a poster child for Marc Milstein’s thesis. Per Smith: “Our brain is like a muscle. Use it or lose it. I want to go to at least 106.”

Way to go Vernon Smith! And while you’re at it, I suggest you also “dance like no one is watching.”

Weddings offer a great opportunity to cut loose and dance, as shown here with Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky and her family. Per Dr. Marc Milstein, don’t just dance at weddings. Dancing can actually keep your brain younger!

 

Want to Stay Younger? Dance! Read More »

The Best Time Is Now

I recently had a wake-up call at a TIGER 21 meeting, thanks to my TIGER colleague and good friend Tom McKelvey. I was giving the Marvin Blum pictorial life story as part of my annual Portfolio Defense. I came to a photo of Laurie and me at Trinity Valley School with Adam in football uniform and Lizzy in cheerleader uniform. I described the picture as the all-time highlight of my life, quoting the title from Jack Nicholson’s epic movie by labeling the photo “As Good As It Gets.”

In the feedback after my presentation, Tom challenged me: “You say that picture was ‘as good as it gets.’ I submit to you that this time in your life right now is ‘as good as it gets.’”

That revelation was startling to me. Here I was winding the clock back 25 years to describe the best moment of my life, and Tom is jolting me into the realization that right now is “as good as it gets.”

How tempting it is to overlook the blessings in our lives and assume our best is behind us or in front of us. Tom pointed out that I’m healthy, married to the love of my life, have terrific kids and five wonderful grandkids, and enjoy a fulfilling career. The song “The Best of Times Is Now” starts ringing in my head.

Kasia Flanagan who documents life stories at everydaylegacies.com had a similar wake-up call. In her March 1, 2024 newsletter, Flanagan confesses to feeling burdened by jugging her business, young family, serving at church, and all that life throws her way. “Too often these days, I am caught up in the busyness of the time, with stress from kids, work, family, and lack of sleep overwhelming me. I’m sad to admit that I generally spend a lot more time dreaming about the future (and these days being past us) than I do being grateful for the present.” Then, when Flanagan interviewed a client who was looking back on her life, the matriarch described the early hectic years with her family as “among the best of her life.” Flanagan suddenly realized the blessings of her current life. She poses the question: “What have been the best days of your life?” It very well may be right now.

As an estate planning attorney, it’s my mission to help clients build and pass down a family legacy. That legacy is the sum of meaningful moments, like the simple yet profound one I’m living right now as I cuddle with my five grandkids. Thanks, Tom and Kasia, for waking me up to count my blessings and realize that today is my best day. Perhaps this post may do the same for some of you.

Then: Marvin and Laurie Blum in a lifetime highlight moment 25 years ago with football player son Adam and cheerleader daughter Lizzy. Now: Marvin Blum with his five grandkids, truly “as good as it gets.”

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Why We Procrastinate, and How To Fix It

I hope all successfully emerged from yesterday’s April Fool’s Day unscathed. Last week’s post pointed out the dangers of procrastinating, which can be particularly costly in estate planning. This week, let’s dive deeper into the risks of procrastinating and the rewards of getting your planning done. Failing to plan can be a very harsh way to make your family feel they’ve been fooled. As my friend Tom Rogerson of GenLegCo. cautions: “Failing to plan is planning to fail.”

To illustrate, consider this real-life tale of two families described by family business consultant Jeff Savlov in his Family Business Minute blog on February 21, 2024. Savlov tells the horror story of an entrepreneur who procrastinated, followed by the success story of a matriarch (Savlov’s own mother) who did it right.

First, the bad story. At age 60, a car accident killed a serial entrepreneur whose attorney had tried unsuccessfully for years to get him to plan. He left behind five kids who had never been trained, suddenly thrust into managing two operating businesses and complex real estate assets. The eldest child had to step up, juggling his own career and family, while grieving the loss of his father. “The lawyer had seen the possibility of a train wreck like this and was unable to help the father manage it more proactively. . . . ‘We have plenty of time,’” or so we think. But as this story shows, that’s not always the case.

Now the good story. Savlov’s mom is a role model for doing it right. After her husband died, she made a commitment to get her affairs in order. “Her driving priority was that all of us [three] siblings would continue to love and support one another. . . . After her death, she wanted us free of administrative hassles and surprises.” To that end, she did detailed planning, including “who would hold onto the infamous twisted soup ladle for future generations.” She also named Jeff as her healthcare representative to manage her end-of-life care, and they discussed her wishes in detail. What a gift to the Savlov siblings!

My niece Jessica Wilen, Ph.D. (an ICF-certified executive coach with significant experience as a psychotherapist and educator at Yale and at Washington University) writes a weekly newsletter called “A Cup of Ambition.” In her February 15, 2024 article, Jessica tackles “Why You’re Procrastinating . . . and What To Do About It.” Given that procrastination is the greatest obstacle in estate planning, I read it with great interest. Jessica covers five reasons why we procrastinate, and what to do about it.

  1. You’re waiting for motivation to strike. It may never happen. What to do: Break the task into smaller sub-tasks. Doing step one motivates you to step two, etc.
  2. You expect too much of yourself, beating yourself up for procrastinating, further paralyzing you. Everyone procrastinates. Don’t be so harsh on yourself.
  3. As a perfectionist, you obsess over details, delaying completion of the task. Consider therapy and coaching to help you manage “toxic perfectionism.”
  4. You’re trying to avoid conflict. You took on a task that you just don’t want to do. “Rip off the bandaid and be honest.” Otherwise, you build up anger and resentment.
  5. You just don’t want to do it. Examine the consequences of not doing it, and if “you can live with the repercussions of not doing it, then this is your official permission slip to not do it.”

Jessica confesses how she put off opening a retirement account. Following her first piece of advice, she broke it into smaller tasks: (1) call the bank and get the paperwork; (2) then fill it out; and (3) then mail it in. One motivated her to do two; two motivated her to do three. Done!

We all have our own stories. As a young lawyer, I struggled with doing tasks that I dreaded. I remember when my boss “volunteered” me to solicit contributions for the Arts Council, and that uncomfortable task kept falling to the bottom of the stack. I got chewed out for that but learned a lesson. I adopted a methodology to do the most dreaded task first, and it really brings a gift of freedom. I give credit to Laurie’s mother Aimee Kriger for training us to “do it now.” She lived that way, and it’s part of the legacy she left to us. I highly recommend it.

Marvin Blum with niece Jessica Wilen, an executive coach offering five tips to help cure us of procrastination.

Why We Procrastinate, and How To Fix It Read More »

In Estate Planning, Procrastination Can Be Costly

The Blum Firm said goodbye to 2023 and hello to a new year filled with promise and opportunity.

On New Year’s 2024, I started year three of this blog urging all to adopt a resolution to update your estate plan, avoiding the temptation to be like Scarlett O’Hara and “worry about that tomorrow.” Procrastination is especially risky when it comes to estate planning. For one, there’s no guarantee we have tomorrow. But moreover, as explained below, we are living in “use it or lose it” times.

At this time of year, The Blum Firm has a tradition of mailing an annual newsletter covering highlights and planning tips. The theme of this year’s letter is “Now Is the Time for Action.” If you failed to receive a copy, notify us to add you to our mailing list. Here’s a link to this year’s letter.

As the newsletter indicates, and I frequently remind, the estate tax exemption shrinks by about $7 million at midnight December 31, 2025 ($14 million for a married couple). I’m often asked to speculate if the current $13,610,000 doubled exemption will be extended. It would take three things for that to happen: the House, the Senate, and the President would all three have to approve and pass a new law. Be aware that extending the exemption does not have bi-partisan support, and we are living in an era where passing legislation is close to impossible.

My word to the wise is to act now to lock in the doubled exemption. Don’t wait until 2025 when estate lawyers will be bombarded.

By gifting now, you can save your family over $5 million. The tax savings is considerably more if you do “squeeze & freeze” planning to first transfer your investments to a Family Limited Partnership (“FLP”) and then transfer FLP interests at a valuation discount. For example, you could transfer an FLP with $20 million of assets (discounted by 35% to $13 million) and completely avoid the 40% estate and gift tax, saving $8 million of tax. If the $20 million grows over time, you also avoid the 40% tax on the appreciation.

I recently met with a couple who told me they’d already used all their exemptions when they did their planning in 2020. They were unaware that inflation bumps in 2021, 2022, 2023, and 2024 yielded them an additional $4,060,000 of exemption. Unless they lock in that extra $4 million, they’ll lose it on the December 31, 2025 sunset date.

There are lots of ways to lock in the exemption before it sunsets. Our menu has a hearty alphabet soup selection: FLP, DGT, SLAT, BDT, GRAT, ILIT, QPRT, CRUT, CLAT, etc. The Blum Firm would be honored to help you identify the selection that’s right for your appetite.

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Benihana Restaurant Blended Family Saga: Stepmother vs. Stepkids

Today’s post continues our series on real-life family business succession dramas. Like the last two posts, we turn again to the food industry for a meaty succession story. Let’s learn lessons from the blended family saga of the Benihana Restaurant chain, truly a case where the truth is stranger than fiction.

This gets messy. Let’s follow the money. Benihana founder Rocky Aoki set up a trust for his six children, retaining a special power of appointment (“SPOA”) to designate how the trust would pass at his death.

Later, Rocky married his third wife Keiko, causing his kids to worry that their inheritance could get diluted. Two of them, Kana and Kevin, met with Rocky’s lawyers about their concerns.

The next day, Rocky met with kids Kana and Kevin and his lawyers, and Rocky signed an irrevocable “Release” limiting the SPOA so that only Rocky’s descendants could inherit the trust. Apparently, no one emphasized to Rocky that it was irrevocable or explained that he could no longer give any of the trust to new wife Keiko.

Almost a year later, Rocky hired a new lawyer and signed a codicil allocating 25% of the trust to new wife Keiko outright. Rocky’s previous lawyers opined that the codicil was invalid because it violated the Release. Rocky later testified he would have never signed the Release had he known it was irrevocable.

Four years later, Rocky signed a new 2007 Will allocating 25% of the trust to wife Keiko outright and 75% to a trust for Keiko’s benefit. According to the Mashed.com article, “Why the Benihana Founder Sued His Own Kids,” just prior to that, Rocky filed suit against four of his seven children for trying to “wrest control” of the company away from him, asserting: “I want to help my kids, but I want my children to crawl, to walk, then run on their own. Then I help them. But they can’t even crawl. They just collect money and do nothing. What else they want? Can’t wait till I’m dead?”

Rocky died a year later, and the 2007 Will (cutting out his kids) was admitted to probate. Rocky’s kids challenged the Will, asserting it violated the Release.

The New York trial court denied the claim of Rocky’s kids, but on appeal, the New York Court of Appeals reversed, finding that Rocky had an opportunity to read the Release and ask questions. Accordingly, the court held that the Release was valid, and the trust passed to Rocky’s kids instead of to wife Keiko.

Let’s unpack a few lessons from this case:

  • First, to the lawyers: Rocky’s original lawyers were playing with fire, trying to dance around all kinds of conflicts of interest dealing with Rocky’s kids. In representing a blended family, be ultra careful to avoid conflicts of interest.
  • Children acting in secrecy to avoid sharing an inheritance with a stepparent is a recipe for a disaster. Although it’s a delicate conversation, the better course is a facilitated family meeting process with open communication.
  • Disinheriting kids in favor of a new spouse is ripe for a claim of undue influence. Take extra precautions to preserve evidence that would defeat such an assertion.
  • Before signing anything, read it and understand what you’re signing.

More than half of Americans are part of a blended family. Recognizing the numerous issues this statistic presents, I gave a speech identifying 18 sensitive fact situations in estate planning for the blended family. Click here to check out “I Do, Round Two: Second Marriage Estate Planning.” The Blum Firm is committed to helping blended families create thoughtful estate plans, reducing the risk of family friction.

 

Marvin gives appreciation to Charles A. Redd for his education on the subject as part of his Cannon Financial Institute, Inc. seminars.

Marvin Blum’s recap of the Benihana family saga offers important tips for business succession planning in a blended family.

 

Benihana Restaurant Blended Family Saga: Stepmother vs. Stepkids Read More »

Business Succession Challenges—More Food (or Beverage) for Thought

Last week’s post used true stories from the food industry to illustrate the importance and challenges of Business Succession Planning. Today’s post quenches the thirst for more business transition lessons by shifting from food to beverage, using real life succession strategies from wine and beer empires.

Let’s start by popping open a Heineken beer. When Freddy Heineken died in 2007, voting control passed to his only child Charlene de Carvalho, a 47-year-old housewife with no business education. “Within a week, daughter Charlene uprooted her tidy life in London, began traveling the globe to study Heineken’s far-flung operations, and learned how to become an effective owner and the guardian of a dynasty.”

Though her father Freddy failed to groom her to take over, Charlene was a quick study. Her transformation from housewife to entrepreneur is especially fortuitous, given Charlene’s sheltered upbringing. She vacationed with the likes of Onassis and Monaco’s Prince Rainier and Princess Grace but lived a mostly simple life eating dinner with her parents on TV trays. After her father survived a frightening kidnapping during Charlene’s honeymoon, Charlene dropped Heineken from her surname and retreated to a reclusive life raising her five kids. Then Daddy died.

Charlene replaced the CEO with a more aggressive leader, embarked on 49 acquisitions, and tripled revenue. Her crash course in business succeeded, but Charlene is determined to be more prudent with succession planning than her father.

Eldest son Alexander is on the board and being groomed to take control. Charlene’s advice to Alexander on selecting board members: “Surround yourself with the best possible people who are not yes men,” unlike Freddy who would only select board members who would agree with him.

Each of the other four children are being educated to be responsible owners. Charlene hired a consultant on inherited wealth to meet with the family as a group and also with each of the five children individually. The consultant addresses with each child “your ambition, desires, questions, maybe even fears of inheriting a legacy.”

Each child is encouraged to pursue some business education which Charlene lacked. Nevertheless, she wants each to follow his or her passion. Those not info business “may play roles in Heineken’s work on philanthropy and social responsibility.”

Shifting beverages from beer to wine, a Wall Street Journal study of 21 family-owned German vineyards (the average founded 11 generations ago) revealed several factors as key in successful generational transition of legacy wineries. Though some may go against your grain, here’s what worked for these families:

  • Preserve family stories: Tell stories at the dinner table of how the family overcame obstacles. “It is hard to complain about losing a customer knowing your great-grandparents overcame war and starvation to build the business.” Research shows that “telling and retelling tales about the family’s entrepreneurial legacy inspires children toward entrepreneurship.”
  • Start training at an early age: Kids can do planting, pruning, packing, and shipping. “The families actively resist the view that childhood is foremost a time to play and explore.”
  • Get a practical education: Attend the best colleges and study business and law, become multilingual, and go to work for competitors before joining the family business.
  • Learn from your children: Allow younger generations to teach the older about new product lines, markets, and the latest technology.
  • Designate one child to have control: Having one child in control protects the business from being split. But, provide the other children with education and financial and emotional support to pursue their own entrepreneurial ventures.
  • Embrace in-laws into the family: Include in-laws in family retreats and hire consultants to foster family communication. In-laws play a critical role in raising the next generation of entrepreneurs.

Whether your business sells wine or widgets, these tips merit consideration. While some may fit your parenting philosophy better than others, these suggestions are certainly good food—or should I say beverages—for thought.

Marvin Blum (with wife Laurie on a vineyard tour) uses family-owned wineries and the Heineken story as role models for business succession planning.

Business Succession Challenges—More Food (or Beverage) for Thought Read More »

Business Succession Planning – Food for Thought

In my post two weeks ago, I promised more real-life business succession stories. Here are three shocking words for many business owners: You will die. Perhaps you read that and say: “Duh! That’s obvious!” But most business owners do no business succession planning, acting as if they’ll live forever.

As an estate planning lawyer, I have come to grips with the reality of death. That wasn’t the case when I was a young lawyer. Then I had a wake-up call. In a meeting with a client, I started a sentence like this: “IF you die,….” The client stopped me and said: “You mean WHEN you die,….” That’s when it hit me.

For this post, I’m doing a survey of real-life succession stories from the food industry. So today, it’s all about food. Let’s start with a favorite appetizer—cheese.

  • Jim Leprino’s Denver-based company Leprino Foods cornered 85% of the pizza cheese market for over 70 years. Leprino landed in court over a battle for succession between two nieces vs. Jim and his two daughters. The jury ruled for Jim after an agonizing trial to determine “the next, um, cheese heads, so to speak. Nieces need not apply.” (Amy C. Cosper, “When the Cheese Stakes Are High,” Family Business Magazine, Jan./Feb. 2023.)
  • The next cheese fight involves The Chicago Pizza and Oven Grinder Co., home of the pizza pot pie. Legal battles over control ensued among three factions: children of founder Albert Beaver, Jr., a longtime employee, and Beaver’s fourth ex-wife. Beaver gifted the business to a trust for his children. The employee later presented documents (which the children assert were forged) where the children relinquished their interests in the trust, followed by Beaver assigning the same business to the employee. Ironically, the restaurant business was a lookout spot for the 1929 St. Valentine’s Day Massacre. Now a business massacre is continuing to this day in the same location. (Joe Barrett, “Chicago Restaurant That Invented Pizza Pot Pie Embroiled in Legal Battle,” Wall Street Journal, Apr. 29, 2023.)
  • Shifting from pizza to another fast-food fiasco, the Fletcher corn dog. Each year at the Texas State Fair, the Fletcher family enjoys sales of more than 500,000 of these breaded hot dogs on a stick, raking in $4 to $5 million in three weeks. When grandfather Fletcher died, his fifth wife G.G. sued granddaughter Jace over the rights to use the Fletcher name for Jace’s competing corn dog business. Jace settled for the name CornDog With No Name.” Both corn dogs are sold at the State Fair. Too bad this wasn’t all resolved while grandfather was alive. “It’s a deep-fried mess.” (Brian Davis, “Corny Dog Crossroads: How a Fletcher’s Trademark Dispute Led to Family War with Deep-Fried Emotions,” Austin American Statesman, Sept. 30, 2020.)
  • Now a fast-food story with a happier outcome—Subway sandwiches. Following a recent trend of charitably inclined business owners, the late Peter Buck left his half of Subway to his family foundation. Following the donation, Subway embarked on negotiations to sell the business at more than $10 billion. Note the order of events—donate to charity first, then sell the business. By doing it in that order, the Buck family avoids tax on the half donated to the foundation. Upon a sale for $10 billion, the foundation receives $5 billion to create educational opportunities, undiluted by income tax. Way to go, Subway! (Simrin Singh, “Late Subway Co-Founder Leaves 50 Percent of Sandwich Chain to Charitable Foundation,” CBS News, Jan. 31, 2023.)
  • Tyson Foods sells one-fifth of the meat eaten in the U.S. Founded in 1931, the Tyson family still controls a majority of the stock. The efforts to keep governance in the family are now at risk, due to rising costs, layoffs, and plant closings. Even worse, CFO John R. Tyson, fourth generation and presumed next in line for Chairman, “pleaded guilty to charges of public intoxication and criminal trespassing, after he allegedly was found asleep in the bed of a woman who didn’t know him.” When selecting family members for key positions to run the businesses, be careful whom you get in bed with. (Dominick Reuter, “Meet the Billionaire Family Behind Tyson Foods, the Beef, Pork, and Chicken Juggernaut Whose Heir Apparent Has Battled Legal Troubles,” Business Insider, Jun. 10, 2023.)
  • Concluding this food survey, consider the saga of brothers Theo and Karl Albrecht, owners of grocery chains Aldi and Trader Joe’s. The Albrecht brothers grew their mother’s corner grocery store in Germany into a giant supermarket business. Theo was notoriously frugal. “He was known to use pencils down to their stubs, wore cheap suits, and never allowed the stores to [indulge] in fancy décor.” Similarly, Karl shunned publicity “and always turned down any honours, leading a secluded life.” However, Theo’s and Karl’s values weren’t successfully infused into the next generations. Theo’s daughter-in-law Babette went against family rules by spending millions on vintage cars and art. Babette challenged her husband’s Will which cut out Babette and her children from control of Aldi Nord, worth more than $22 billion. The family reached a settlement whereby Babette and her children have to make do with $36 million a year. The drama continued when Theo’s wife Cacilie died, leaving a Will where “she accused Babette and her children of ‘lavish spending’ and of siphoning $112 million from one of the company’s foundations to fund her lifestyle,” adding “they should have no role in the company’s future.” (Meira Gebel, “The Family Behind Grocery Giant Aldi Is Locked in a Feud After the Founder’s Wife Tried to Cut Her Grandkids Out of the Business in her Will—Meet the Albrechts,” Business Insider, Apr. 5, 2019.)

The lessons from these food industry stories abound. As Amy Cosper points out in her article, family business succession is fraught with challenges: “No matter the company size, revenue or sector, family business succession is never easy, and no two successions are the same…. ‘There are a lot of reasons succession is hard,’ explains Dennis Jaffe…. ‘Leaders want to hang on and sometimes think nobody else can possibly do a job better…. When emotions run high, things get messy. The best strategy is to have a plan.”

Furthermore, senior generations need to be intentional about imparting the family values to future generations, especially to younger ones who grow up in wealth! Your estate planner can help you design a strategy to address these challenges.

Marvin Blum draws lessons from the food industry to show the importance of business succession planning, including the story of the Albrecht family’s Trader Joe’s grocery.

Business Succession Planning – Food for Thought Read More »

Rise to the Occasion: The “Shark Tank Trust”

As mentioned in last week’s post, my regular Valentine’s Day speech in Midland was postponed. Much to Laurie’s pleasure, I rose to the occasion and took her to Rise, her favorite dining experience. Rise urges all to follow their souffle motto and “Rise to the Occasion,” a theme I’ll borrow for this week’s post. Whereas last week’s focus was business transition at the end of the founder’s tenure, we flip this week to the other end of the business life cycle. How can parents, especially in more affluent homes, encourage the next generation to “rise to the occasion” and pursue entrepreneurial endeavors?

It’s the American Dream. A kid with grit and talent grows up to build a mega-successful business. Interestingly, children who grow up with modest means learn how to prioritize limited resources, using their wits to make the most out of whatever they have. Moreover, sharing close living quarters with others teaches them to relate to others, building leadership and interpersonal skills. Family consultant Tom Rogerson of GenLeg Co. describes the conditions of a modest upbringing as creating an “entrepreneurial incubator.” Kids from that world learn how to build and lead a team.

However, as a family’s wealth increases and kids become more independent, they lose much of that drive and interpersonal connection. Rogerson labels such a privileged environment as an “entrepreneurial kill-zone.” Kids from that world are much less likely to become risk-taking entrepreneurs.

How can business creators improve the odds that future generations, though affluent, avoid the “kill-zone” and grow an entrepreneurial spirit? The answer lies in designing an inheritance structure that creates empowered, rather than entitled, heirs. Enter the “Shark Tank Trust.”

Pamela Cucina and Eric Czepyha, both with Northern Trust, explore this concept in “The Entrepreneur’s Trust” (Trusts & Estates, May 2023). Traditionally, trusts that automatically dole out regular distributions are like giving a kid an allowance. Beneficiaries are shielded from trust investment management and decision making, leaving the heavy lifting to family offices and trustees. Per Cucina and Czepyha, this traditional structure “has the potential to infantilize rather than empower and inspire beneficiaries, creating a generation of ‘perpetual children’ who are ill equipped to become responsible and engaged stewards of the family’s wealth and business holdings.” Furthermore, such trust babies are unlikely to possess the grit and ingenuity to become an entrepreneur.

It’s time for a new kind of trust that will “ignite a fire” and “cultivate a spirit of entrepreneurship.” Cucina and Czepyha call it the “Entrepreneur’s Trust.” I’m borrowing the concept from a hit TV show and labeling it the “Shark Tank Trust,” but it’s the same thing. Here are some key features:

  • Authorize the trustee to invest in a business where the beneficiary will be actively involved, even if new or speculative.
  • For each such investment, require the beneficiary to present a “Shark Tank” business plan with projected budgets and information on advisors and co-investors.
  • Hold the business to certain standards of accountability, such as conservative leverage, hiring practices, and reporting requirements.
  • Encourage beneficiaries to get the needed financial education.
  • Develop parameters for requirements to be met before funding additional capital needs beyond the initial investment.
  • Allow the trustee to hire outside advisors, at the expense of the trust, to evaluate the proposed business.
  • Use a Directed Trust approach where the Shark Tank process is delegated to an investment committee.
  • Waive the trustee’s duty to diversify and duty of impartiality for such private investments.
  • Indemnify the trustee from liability related to such investment decisions.
  • Consider imposing a percentage limitation on the portion of trust assets to be invested in the beneficiaries’ private businesses.

In addition to these provisions, probe the trust creator’s intent on the “why” behind the entrepreneurial emphasis. Include such statements of intent (the “why”) in the material purposes section of the trust. For example, perhaps the trustor believes that private businesses are better investments for creating and preserving wealth, provide practical training, and give beneficiaries the fulfillment that comes from achieving something out of their own hard work and skill. Knowing that “why” can guide trustees, and moreover, inspire beneficiaries to endure challenges in their quest for the stars, achieving the rewards of self-esteem and self-growth along the way.

In the words of the Latin motto adopted by Fort Worth’s Trinity Valley School’s beloved founding Headmaster Stephen Seleny, give your kids the chance to grow per aspera ad astra, through difficulty to the stars.

Marvin and Laurie Blum enjoying a Valentine dinner at Rise, encouraging the next generation to “Rise to the Occasion” and pursue entrepreneurial endeavors.

 

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Family Business Succession: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

I hope everyone had a happy Valentine’s Day. For the last several years, I spent most of my Valentine’s Days speaking to advisors in Midland, Texas. The same was to happen this year, but my speech was rescheduled (from my wife’s perspective, a happy postponement, for as much as I enjoy my connection with the terrific Midland planning community, I admit that being there on Cupid’s day without Laurie is not the most romantic way to celebrate). However, I was in Midland recently for a presentation on a topic I describe as the most neglected (and potentially dramatic) area of estate planning, Business Succession Planning.

What makes succession planning so challenging? There are no easy answers or fill-in-the-blank forms. In my Midland presentation on “Business Succession Planning,” I dive into the many technical and psychological aspects, including buy/sell agreements, life insurance solutions, squeeze & freeze tools, and charitable planning ideas. Click here to read the PowerPoint.

The TV Series “Succession” has certainly made business transition a sexier topic. On top of that fictional account of family power struggle to take over a family enterprise, the media coverage is replete with real-life examples of succession intrigue. Over the coming weeks, I’ll share a number of sensational true stories so we can learn the “do’s and don’ts” from them.

The Blum family has its own example of business transition “don’ts” which I’ve confessed before. I’ve readily admitted that this cobbler at times needs to take better care of my own shoes. This month marks seven years since my brother Irwin’s sudden death at age 65 from pancreatic cancer. Irwin was running our family’s meat-packing supply business, handling every important aspect of the business by himself. He was a business whiz, but his style was to keep most data in his head and fly solo. When he left us suddenly, we had a miracle solution. Our mother Elsie (now 93 and still 100% sharp and a business whiz herself) emerged from retirement to manage the business transition. However, our way is not the safe way, for as I wrote in my March 1, 2022 post, “Not Every Family Has an Elsie.”

The Blum family lesson for business leaders is to train successors and, hard as it is, delegate important tasks to them so they can learn. Let’s observe more real world “do’s and don’ts” from three other recent stories of succession. Here is my version of “The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.”

The Good: H-E-B grocery is a multiple recipient of the Dunnhumby award as the top U.S. grocery retailer, named for owner Howard E. Butt. In the article, “That Time I Met the Owner of H-E-B, and Drove Through a River,” Christopher de Vinck credits H-E-B’s succession win with the strong culture the Butt family instilled in their Texas grocery chain (DallasNews.com). Originally founded by Florence Butt, the business passed from her to son Howard Sr., then to Howard Jr., and now to other Butt family members. Howard Jr. challenged his team with this question: “Is our work a paycheck or a calling?” As a leader, Butt lived by his motto “The High Calling of Our Daily Work” and taught “the difference between a company that only cares about money and a company that cares about the customers.” Butt passed down that “spiritual beauty of the best entrepreneurial practices.” Crediting Butt’s values-based leadership for H-E-B grocery’s business continuity, de Vinck sums up the reason for their success: “What a leader says at the top filters throughout the system.”

The Bad: Three months before French fashion designer Pierre Cardin died at 98 of Covid, he boasted to a reporter: “After my death? I don’t think about it. I didn’t organize anything. NOTHING.” The result: a notorious legal battle among 22 family members claiming to be heirs. Cardin, who never had children, left behind an UNSIGNED will designating one nephew Rodrigo to take over his 99.999% ownership. Unsurprisingly, a Paris court ruled the will invalid. As Dana Thomas quotes in “A Tale of Family Intrigue and Inheritance” (New York Times, Sept. 25, 2023), “He didn’t want to hand over his power. He wanted to keep it until the end.” Worse yet, Pierre Cardin refused to create a legally binding succession plan for his family: “Every time we said, ‘Let’s go to the notary and put it down on paper,’ he canceled at the last minute. He couldn’t imagine someone replacing him.” He saw himself as indispensable, bringing to mind another famous Frenchman Charles de Gaulle who wisely admonished: “Cemeteries are full of indispensable people.” Cardin is in one of those graves now while his family feuds over the mega-mess he left behind, three wanting to continue the legacy and 19 wanting to sell and cash out.

The Ugly: Can it get worse? Consider the drama playing out in real time in the Hermes luxury fashion house. Nicolas Puech, also childless like Cardin, is a fifth-generation billionaire owner who has ignited a bitter succession war within the Hermes dynasty. Observe this real-life story where truth is stranger than fiction. The Hermes descendant is adopting his 51-year-old gardener and designating this “‘handyman’ from a ‘modest Moroccan family’ as his rightful heir” (Mary K. Jacob, “Hermes Heir Awarding 51-Year-Old Gardener $11B Fortune, $5.9M in Properties,” New York Post, Dec. 11, 2023). His actions have triggered “an acrimonious battle within the family…[and] irreparable discord with his kin.” Puech had previously pledged his fortune to the Isocrates Foundation, who “opposes any unilateral cancellation of the inheritance contract.” Was it a “contract” or a revocable pledge? Let’s watch to see how this ugly showdown unfolds.

Perhaps script writers are already busy writing a sequel to “Succession.” There’s certainly plenty of material for it here, and even more to come in my upcoming posts.

Marvin Blum speaking in Midland on Business Succession Planning, the most neglected (and potentially dramatic) area of estate planning.

 

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What I Learned from Presidents Bush and Clinton

I had a mountaintop experience a few days ago. Attending the 25th Anniversary Conference for TIGER 21, the highlight was a candid conversation with President Bush and President Clinton. Without getting deeply political, I’ll share a few presidential takeaways that apply to my efforts to help families create a lasting legacy and thrive from generation to generation.

First and foremost is the example they set as close friends in spite of their political differences. Only 44 days apart in age, Bush described Clinton as a “brother from another mother.” They are role models for civility. When we disagree with family members or others, look to Bush and Clinton for inspiration on how to maintain civil discourse in spite of differing viewpoints.

Here’s a case in point. Clinton ran an aggressive campaign and deprived Bush’s father, George H.W. Bush, of a second term. Moderator Michael Sonnenfeldt asked Bush if he held any resentment over Clinton beating his dad. Bush answered absolutely not. Coming from political families, “we understand losing elections.” He elaborated that his dad had lost multiple elections, never winning a statewide election in Texas. Yet the Bush family respected the process and held no remorse.

Eight years later, Bush defeated Clinton’s Vice President Al Gore in a hotly contested presidential race, yet Bush and Clinton continued to get along. In the first term of his presidency, Bush called upon his dad and Clinton to work together to help him. He appointed them to head up the American response to the disastrous Indian Ocean tsunami. A year later, Bush again called upon them to team up to help address the Hurricane Katrina crisis. Given today’s political polarization, it’s astounding to observe such high-minded behavior. As my wife Laurie would say, “it’s always best to take the high road.” Bush and Clinton certainly took the high road.

Another takeaway that I recommend for families wrestling with tension is to preserve a sense of humor. Though the topics were serious and potentially contentious, Bush and Clinton found connection by sharing humor. A light-hearted comment can help us restore perspective that the relationship we share is what is paramount. Once, Bush jumped in with an answer before the notoriously long-winded Clinton could respond, chiding Clinton for always “talking too long,” so this time Bush wanted to have the floor first. When Clinton’s Apple watch went off, interrupting the flow, Bush joked: “Tell Hillary hi.” A further humorous tribute to their family connection was Bush kidding that Clinton visited his elderly “HW” dad at their Kennebunkport home even more than son “W” did.

My favorite example of humor came in their opening lines. Sonnenfeldt began with the observation that half the attendees at the conference likely voted for Bush and half likely voted for Clinton. Bush’s quick retort: “All of you would vote for either one of us today.” To which Clinton added: “Except we’re too young.” That humor opened the door for a very relaxed and revealing program.

A final observation that applies to family conflict is to find common ground. With Bush and Clinton, there was plenty of common ground. Both expressed concern over those in America who are advocating for isolationism. They were emphatically aligned on their unwavering support for Israel, doing “whatever it takes” to protect Israel and insure its survival. They also expressed fervent support for Ukraine, saying the world would long regret it if Putin won.

Both are champions for bipartisan cooperation. Bush praised Clinton for repeatedly reaching consensus with House Speaker Newt Gingrich, whom Clinton would frequently call to the White House. Per Clinton, Gingrich’s staff started discouraging Gingrich from attending those meetings, aware that Clinton had a way of convincing Gingrich to cave in.

The conversation ended with optimism for America’s future, citing advancements in technology, healthcare, education, and entrepreneurship. They believe the strength of our institutions will withstand whatever happens in the next election and the following four years. Let’s hope they’re right.

The program was an inspiring reminder to cling to values of decency and civility in spite of our disagreements. Families striving for harmony can draw valuable lessons from these leaders. The session ended with Bush planting a big kiss on Clinton’s right temple, which was very warmly received. That kiss served as yet another lesson to battling relatives—follow mother’s advice to put aside differences “and now kiss and make up.”

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum was honored to meet Presidents Bush and Clinton, role models for civility and decency despite their differences. May their example inspire families to do the same.

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What I Learned From My Brother-in-Law’s T-Shirt

I have a brother-in-law Barry Wilen (married to Laurie’s sister Diane) who is one of those super-smart, walking encyclopedia kind of guys. Normally, his wisdom deals with academic topics and world events. But on a recent visit to their home in Hollywood, Florida, Barry waxed eloquent on a softer topic—the benefits of walking. To be more specific, it was actually Barry’s T-shirt that did the talking.

Laurie and I joined Barry and Diane on their morning ritual, a three-mile walk in Topeekeegee Yugnee Park. As the photo of the front of Barry’s T-shirt attests, they’ve passed the 10,000-mile mark. But even more impressive is the back of Barry’s T-shirt that touts some of the many benefits of walking.

Barry’s wisdom on walking brought to mind my post of August 22, 2023, entitled “Take a Walk– Alone, No Phone.” That post promoted the benefit of walks in nature, particularly silent walking and moments of stillness. Although the Wilen hikes aren’t silent, the experience is still inspirational and restorative.

Reflecting on that post, I recalled the powerful reaction that it generated. As we contemplate the immense physical and spiritual benefits of taking walks, I’ll share some of the profound comments readers of that post sent me.

  • “YES, Marvin! YES! This is gold. Wonderful post and stillness, to me, is the new busy. Somewhere along the way we culturally accepted busy (often rushed) as the norm. That if you weren’t ‘crazy busy’ you weren’t DOING enough. We are after all a productivity culture. Creativity or vision or ideas come in the stillness. Stillness makes way for gratitude, which is the ultimate state in which to receive. Connection to G-d is found in the stillness. Meditation changed my life 2 years ago. I just love this post.”
  • “I do my best thinking when I am alone walking. I do my walk around the TCU campus and intentionally do not listen to a podcast or call anyone on the phone. It is so nourishing.”
  • “Today’s article resonated with me. I am actually planning on walking the El Camino trail across Portugal and Spain and plan to only use my cell in an emergency. Like you discovered on your walk around Lady Bird Lake, I am excited by the prospect to be completely detached from technology and have a couple of hundred miles or so to calm that ‘hurricane’ that constantly occupies my mind.”
  • “Quoting from an article “Walking” in The Atlantic, ‘I have met with but one or two persons in the course of my life who understood the art of Walking, that is, of taking walks—who had a genius, so to speak, for sauntering: …under pretense of going ‘a la Sainte Terre, to the Holy Land…. For every walk is a sort of crusade [to the] …Holy Land.”
  • “I have tried (sometimes more successfully than other times) to add thinking time to my day.” The reader attached an article about President Eisenhower, perfectly on point, from The New York Times (Jan. 19, 1954), “President Has Only Hour a Day to Think and Had to Beg for That.” “’The President’s main complaint is that we don’t give him enough time to think,’ Mr. Shanley said. ‘Finally, we had to set aside a half hour in the morning and the same time in the afternoon, in order to give the President the time he requires.’”
  • “Regarding ‘Take a Walk,’ I’m a huge proponent and have been all my life. My grandfather was a locally known ‘naturalist’ in Southwestern Wisconsin and has a trail named after him. He and my father taught me that part of the time should be spent silently, listening to sounds and seeing sights.”

This last piece of wisdom came with a link to a brilliant article on Today.com by Daryl Austin (Aug. 25, 2023) called “What Is Silent Walking?” advocating silent walking “to disconnect from all the noise and chaos that is part of our busy world.” The article offers tips on how to do it, warning it’s easier said than done. Benefits include reduced anxiety levels, improved sleep, lower blood pressure and heart rate, improved blood glucose levels, and a boost to the immune system.

I hope you’re as inspired as I am to take time for some meditative walks. Who knows what meaningful revelations may emerge!

(1) Marvin Blum with brother-in-law Barry Wilen, a walking enthusiast who has logged more than 10,000 miles on the trails of Topeekeegee Yugnee Park in Hollywood, Florida. (2) The back of Barry Wilen’s T-shirt waxes eloquent on the benefits of walking. Here’s to your physical and mental wellbeing!

 

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More Wisdom from “Frugal” Warren Buffett (Including His Wife’s Reaction to a $4 Coffee)

Last week’s post was dedicated to the wisdom of Warren Buffett’s longtime sidekick Charlie Munger who died in late 2023 at age 99. Today’s post looks ahead to 2024 and the next annual meeting without Munger. Although Charlie is irreplaceable and we’ll miss his sharp intellect and wit, the show must go on. Our family has already booked our annual pilgrimage to Omaha for this year’s annual meeting on May 3-5. Come join us!

In anticipation of the upcoming “Woodstock for Capitalists” (as the annual meeting is commonly dubbed), I’ll share a few tidbits of wisdom from the Oracle of Omaha. Previous posts have described much of Warren’s estate planning philosophy. Today, let’s dive deeper into Buffett’s estate plan, as many join me in finding it to be instructive.

The Oracle of Omaha revealed in his 2020 annual letter to shareholders that his Will directs his executors “not to sell any Berkshire shares.” Furthermore, after the estate closes and the shares transfer to trusts, the trustees are likewise directed to sell no Berkshire stock. Over the 12 to 15 years following his death, they are to gradually convert portions of A shares into B shares and distribute them all to various foundations.

Buffett acknowledges that absent such explicit direction, state law would require his fiduciaries to diversify assets. Accordingly, “my Will also absolves both the executors and the trustees from liability from maintaining what obviously will be an extreme concentration of assets.”

Buffett believes that holding Berkshire stock during the 12 to 15 years disposal period will enrich his estate better than an upfront sale and reinvestment in US Treasury bonds. Although perhaps not the “safe” course, “there is a high probability that [his] directive will deliver substantially greater resources to society.” As he later expounds in a Nov. 2023 Berkshire news release, “Berkshire’s advantage is that it has been built to last.”

Here’s the lesson from Buffett’s “Berkshire-only” instructions. If you own a family business, real estate, or certain other investments that you want preserved in your trust, spell it out in your estate plan. Otherwise, state law will likely force your trustees to liquidate and diversify.

Interestingly, Buffett’s estate plan doesn’t delay making charitable gifts until his death. In a Berkshire news release in June 2023, Buffett announced that over the last 17 years, he has gifted about $50 billion of Berkshire stock to five foundations as part of a plan for annual grants he adopted in 2006. By far the largest recipient is the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. Buffett confirmed that the plan will continue after his death: “My Will provides that more than 99% of my estate is destined for philanthropic usage.” In the Nov. 2023 news release, he offers further wisdom on the reason for his philanthropy at death: “My children, along with their father, have a common belief that dynastic wealth, though both legal and common in much of the world including the United States, is not desirable….Private philanthropy will always have an important place in America.”

As previously reported, I’ve had the privilege of asking Buffett estate planning questions at three Berkshire Hathaway annual meetings. Each time, Buffett stresses the importance of raising kids, especially affluent kids, with solid values. Per Buffett, the best way for parents to build a lasting legacy is being role models who live those values themselves. He advises that kids are watching their parents more than they are listening to them.

Since the kids are watching, Buffett cautions against living an extravagant lifestyle, even if there’s great wealth. Worth about $115 billion as the world’s seventh richest person, Buffett takes that value to the extreme, to the point of being considered “frugal.” According to a Business Insider article last July 14th, “Bill Gates, a longtime friend of the 92-year-old, once recalled the billionaire pulling out a handful of coupons to pay for a McDonald’s meal.” Moreover, Buffett still lives in the same Omaha house he bought for $31,500 in 1958.

That frugality spills over to Buffett’s family. That same Business Insider article reported that at a summer summit for billionaires in Sun Valley, Idaho, Warren’s wife Astrid Buffett was overheard griping to resort employees about having to pay $4 for a cup of coffee. She complained that she could buy a whole pound of coffee for that price. Astrid was working as a waitress at the French Café in Omaha when she first met Warren. They married in 2006, and it’s evident she embraces her husband’s views on conservative spending.

For all those who cling to every story and piece of advice we can glean from the Oracle, Buffett is certainly a gift that keeps on giving.

Marvin E. Blum

Estate planning attorney Marvin Blum with son Adam and a cutout of Warren Buffett

Marvin Blum (left) with son Adam, part of the “Warren Buffett Fan Club” that welcomes all tidbits of wisdom from the Oracle of Omaha. 

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A Role Model for Philanthropy with Strings: Rest in Peace, Charlie Munger

While I’m still reflecting on 2023, I lament the passing of Charlie Munger at age 99, Warren Buffett’s sidekick at Berkshire-Hathaway for nearly 50 years. All of us in Charlie’s fan club knew the day would come, though we kept hoping it’d be later. He was the kind of guy who just seemed like he might live forever—brilliant and quick-witted all the way till the end. We can learn a lot from Charlie’s life. He was a voracious reader who committed the bulk of every day to learning. He was a genius investor who freely shared his advice, such as buying quality companies with good upside potential, paying a good (even though not bargain) price, rather than buying cheaper damaged goods. But the lessons from Charlie Munger’s life I want to focus on today is his philanthropy.

Per Karen Langley’s Wall Street Journal article “Charlie Munger’s Donations Came with Plans Down to the Details,” (Dec. 4, 2023), he gave more than $500 million to universities, hospitals, and other institutions. But “Munger didn’t just write checks.” He was a generous donor, but his gifts came with strings. He had specific ideas for the use of philanthropic dollars, and he attached conditions to his gifts. When he funded campus projects, the money came with blueprints for the design. For example, “he pushed for high ceilings and plentiful common areas and expressed his dislike for buildings with curves.”

Munger was especially interested in the design of student housing, seeing it as “a component of education…. It’s where young people meet and learn to exchange ideas and form business relationships that they’ll then have for the rest of their lives.” I can personally attest to the value of student interaction, as I consider the lifelong impact of my law school classmates on my law practice. To facilitate such interaction, Munger insisted that hallways should be wider “such that when people see each other they are comfortable interacting whenever they bump into each other.” Munger Hall at UC Santa Barbara was a residence hall so large that it even contained interior bedrooms in order to house thousands more students. Munger eliminated bedroom windows, opting for “artificial windows with LED lighting that would mimic natural daylight.” One architect was so offended by the omission of bedroom windows that he resigned, but Munger refused to budge.

Recent media coverage highlights many major donors who have been disappointed by the way their funds are being spent by universities, often the donor’s own alma mater that the donor believes has gone off course. Munger’s approach is instructive. His advice would be to carefully design the gift, so it is contractual. Make the donation pursuant to an agreement that spells out detailed conditions where, if violated, the gift is revoked.

As generous as he was, the billionaire Munger refused to join his partner Buffett in signing Bill Gates’ Giving Pledge to donate at least half of your net worth to charity. The reason? He’d already given more than half of his wealth to his kids. (Sounds like Charlie did some very effective estate planning!) Unwilling to sign the pledge, he explained, “I’ve already given more than half of it to my children. So I can’t join them. It’s like coming back from the dead. I can’t do it.”

As we look to Munger as a role model, it’s interesting that Munger’s philanthropic views were inspired by one of his role models. “I’ve patterned my life after [Benjamin] Franklin. I stopped trying to make more money when I had enough. He did the same damn thing. He didn’t try to die with all his money, he gave away a lot of it…I’ve done the same thing.”

In the second of my three opportunities to ask a question at Berkshire annual meetings, I had the privilege of asking Warren & Charlie about their charitable giving. In their answer to me, Warren echoed Charlie’s sentiments about giving it away before you die, joking: “As Charlie said the other day, where he’s going, it won’t do him much good anyway. There’s no Forbes 400 in the graveyard.” Sadly, Charlie now lies in that graveyard, but his legacy lives on in millions of dollars of gifts designed exactly the way he wanted that money spent. And if those recipients ever go against Charlie’s wishes, I’m sure he’ll figure out a way to come back and haunt them.

Marvin E. Blum

Charlie Munger and Adam Blum

Marvin Blum’s son Adam with the irreplaceable and no-nonsense Charlie Munger, a role model for carefully structuring charitable gifts to meet the donor’s specifications.

 

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How My Work and Workout Communities Enrich My Life (and Maybe Will Help Propel Me to 98 Like Anna Stucker)

In last week’s post, I told of a joyful holiday visit from our kids and five rambunctious grandkids (even though a shattered porcelain pot means one less thing in our estate sale when we die). Reflecting on last month’s holidays brings many happy thoughts, all associated with meaningful interactions with family and friends. As I think about those holiday gatherings, here’s what hit me. Our lives are richly blessed by being a part of some wonderful communities. I began to count those communities, and in doing so, I count my blessings.

Research shows that being a part of a community does more than make you feel happier. It also actually makes you feel healthier. Indeed, the research goes so far as to show that it contributes to our longevity. More than that, of the top ten factors that help us live longer, the top two have to do with human interaction and relationships.

My post from June 14, 2022, on Ten Keys to a Long (and Good) Life listed ten factors (in reverse order of importance) which I’ll repeat here:

10. Clean air
9. Hypertension medication
8. Staying lean
7. Exercise
6. Cardiac rehab
5. Flu vaccine
4. Quit drinking
3. Quit smoking
2. Close relationships
1. Social integration

Being a member of a community feeds the top two reasons people live long and good lives. The human connection is food for the soul, which in turn contributes to a healthy body, mind, and spirit. It’s all connected.

The holidays brought me interactions with so many meaningful communities: my family, Canoe Brothers, TIGER 21 colleagues, neighbors, friends, civic organizations, fellow Longhorn boosters at the Sugar Bowl (we almost did it!), and others. But I want to shine a light on two that especially enrich my life: my work community and my workout community. These two in particular work together to give my life balance.

I typically refer to my work community as The Blum Firm “family.” I use the word family very sincerely. I shared in prior posts that my first lawyer job was in the Big Law world, which was not a happy fit for me. When I left to form The Blum Firm, I made a vow to create a caring environment where people would be surrounded by co-workers who support each other and care about each other. When I’m asked about my greatest professional accomplishment, the answer is easy: it’s the team I’ve assembled. We share a commitment to our clients and each other, and we strive for excellence in everything we do. No one here is flying solo. We know we can rely on the strengths of everyone in the firm to always be there to help, making each of us a better professional and a happier worker. When I left the big law firm, my father-in-law wisely said, “Don’t be mad at them. Send them a thank-you note.” Boy was Abe Kriger right! I am grateful every day that I get to spend my work hours with a wonderful work family.

The old adage to avoid an “all work and no play” life certainly speaks to my efforts to build a balanced life. Part of how I aim for balance is to spend a part of each day working out. As I got older, I discovered that my workout experience is far better if I do it with a group. Laurie and I are members of a fitness center where we do almost all our workouts in classes. Our workout group has become another meaningful community. We encourage each other and enjoy the camaraderie. As each other’s accountability partners, we are much more inclined to show up and give it our all. For those whose new year’s resolution list includes more regular exercise, I strongly urge you to join a fitness group.

I’ll close with a tribute to one of the stars of our workout community, 98-years-young Anna Stucker. Anna is our role model. I joined an aquatics class and Anna shows up every day to not only swim but also serve as the class cheerleader. It turns out that she had perfect training for that role. When she attended college at the University of Kansas, she was a Jayhawks cheerleader. Anna graduated with a geology degree, moved to Texas for work as a geologist, married and raised three outstanding kids, and never stopped being physically active. Anna is a perfect example of the longevity benefits of both staying active and also staying connected with people. Her mind is as sharp as ever. And on top of that, she still fits in her Kansas cheerleader uniform! Anna inspires us all.

As we embark on 2024, may we all find the fulfillment of becoming connected with communities. We’ll be happier and healthier for it, and maybe even at 98, we can be like Anna Stucker!

Marvin E. Blum

Estate planning attorney Marvin Blum in pool exercise class

(1) Laurie and Marvin Blum celebrating Anna Stucker’s 98th birthday. (2) Marvin Blum (far right) and his aquatics colleagues, with role model Anna Stucker (age 98) in the center. (3-Photo Below) Building a superstar team at The Blum Firm is Marvin Blum’s greatest professional achievement. Here they are celebrating the 2023 holiday season.

Group of employees and family of The Blum Firm

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One Less Thing for Our Estate Sale When We Die

I’ve always been a big advocate of bedtime reading to kids. As Adam and Lizzy were growing up, we built a collection of children’s books and I’d read one (or more likely, several) to them every night. I credit that ritual with the fact that Adam and Lizzy both grew up to be voracious readers. I’ve continued that nightly practice now with our five grandkids. An interesting thing about kids’ books is that there’s actually a lot of grown-up wisdom in them. I recalled a piece of that wisdom over the holidays to help me through a challenging episode in our home. The source of that wisdom was a Sesame Street book entitled Bert and the Broken Teapot.

Here’s what happened. During the last week of the year, we went from a home of two to a home of 11, plus a dog. It was a joy to have our kids and grandkids (ages 11-3) with us over the holidays. But as any honest person will tell you, it’s also a hectic experience. One Friday night we made it even more hectic by inviting nine more to join us for Shabbat dinner, including 3 more munchkins. As you can imagine, eight little ones running around is a fun scene, but a recipe for chaos. Soon there was a CRASH! Stella, the biggest of the bunch, collided into a table and the breakable contents went flying. One casualty was a beautiful porcelain pot.

I remained calm on the outside, but my insides were in turmoil. Then my mind went back to Bert and the Broken Teapot, and I quickly began to heal. In that story, Bert was minding the soda fountain for David when he accidentally knocked over the special teapot that Mr. Hooper had given David years ago. Like my porcelain pot, it was now in a million pieces. Bert felt terrible about it and fought back tears to say “I’m sorry,” as Stella did to me. Here’s how David responded: “My friend Bert is more important to me than any teapot.” Those words were ringing in my ears. My granddaughter Stella is more important to me than any porcelain pot.

From her reading, Lizzy also came to my rescue and waxed yet more philosophical. She explained that Viktor Frankl, an Austrian psychiatrist who survived the Nazi concentration camps, taught that “between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” We cannot control what happens. The only thing we can control is how we respond to it. The crash happened. Now I was in that space where I had the freedom to choose how to respond. I chose to prioritize my love for my granddaughter (and my understanding that this kind of thing happens when you have a house full of kids) over some THING. Lizzy went on to explain that Frankl’s wisdom applies well beyond broken pots. In her words, here’s how she uses it to handle life’s challenges: “I say, ‘ok, this is the situation. I can either fall apart, refuse to acknowledge it and build up anger, or deal with it the best way I can and hand the rest over to G-d.’” That night, the tables turned and the father learned a lesson from the daughter.

My wife Laurie chimed in with her own good wisdom to help everyone feel better: “Who cares about a pot? So there’ll be one less thing in the estate sale when we die.” So simple, yet so profound, and so true!

And as if all that wisdom from Sesame Street, Viktor Frankl, Lizzy Savetsky, and Laurie Blum wasn’t enough, a session of restorative yoga helped get my headspace right too. In these hectic times, we need all the help we can get!

As I’ve often emphasized in this blog, we have to be intentional to create family “glue” that helps keep a family connected over the generations. Let’s learn from the actions of those 10% of families who do it best. They have family meetings, teach meaningful lessons to their kids, engage in philanthropy, take family trips, preserve stories of their heritage, and very importantly, they gather as a family for special occasions and holidays and keep alive family traditions, just as we were doing at that Shabbat dinner. Don’t let a broken pot spoil the beauty of your family time together.

Marvin E. Blum

(1) When rambunctious kids like Marvin Blum’s five grandkids invade your home and maybe even break a pot, keep perspective about what really matters. (2) Restorative yoga also helps Marvin, daughter Lizzy, and granddaughter Stella keep their headspace right.

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New Year’s Resolution: Don’t Be Like Scarlett O’Hara

Here’s to a new year and all the promise it holds for a brighter 2024! In the spirit of new year’s resolutions, let’s tackle the number one obstacle to estate planning: procrastination. In Gone with the Wind, Scarlett O’Hara famously dodged today’s problems by declaring, “I’ll worry about that tomorrow.” Scarlett’s decision to violate Thomas Jefferson’s proverb and “put off until tomorrow that which could be done today” may have helped her cope with Civil War devastation, but it’s not a wise strategy for estate planning. The most obvious reason is our mortality. We have no guarantee of living until tomorrow. But there’s another reason not to tarry. There’s about to be a mad rush to do “use it or lose it” planning by December 31, 2025.

As Hayley Cuccinello warns in a recent Business Insider article, “In the next two years, estate planning will rev up into high gear as the end to the Trump tax cuts approaches.” In particular, a person’s unused lifetime estate and gift tax exemption will decline by about $7 million as the clock strikes midnight on December 31, 2025. I call it the “Cinderella” effect—when her coach suddenly turns back into a pumpkin. Go to bed with a $14 million exemption. Wake up with a $7 million exemption. Poof—$7 million exemption is gone ($14 million for a couple).

Here’s another reason to examine your estate plan in the new year. On January 1, 2024, the lifetime exemption rose by $690,000 to $13,610,000 per person. Even if a married couple fully utilized their exemptions through prior planning, they now have an additional $1,380,000, half of which will go to waste in not locked in by December 31, 2025. In addition, the annual exclusion for gifts rose from $17,000 per donee to $18,000 per donee, so a couple can now give each child (or any other donee) $36,000 free of estate and gift tax.

By using certain squeeze & freeze tools like DGTs, SLATs, and GRATs, you can lock in the doubled lifetime exemption before it sunsets in half. However, you must act soon, lest you awaken with remorse on New Year’s Day, two years from now.

Through creative trust planning, you can lock in the exemption but retain access, control, and flexibility over your assets. As Cuccinello points out, “Some of these tax avoidance techniques might be eyebrow-raising, yet they are perfectly legal.”

In addition to the above-mentioned squeeze & freeze ideas, Cuccinello touts Qualified Personal Residence Trusts (QPRTs), Charitable Remainder Trusts (CRTs), Private Placement Life Insurance (PPLI), and Dynasty Trusts that last up to 1,000 years (note that Texas now allows 300-year trusts). She also advocates doing planning before the economy fully recovers. “The down market has one silver lining…. It is an optimal time to create new trusts as people can transfer depressed assets” at a lower valuation. Pre-recovery planning beats post-recovery planning.

Two years may seem far off. But if your experience is like mine, two years will fly by in a flash. The older I get, the more time seems to speed up. Moreover, waiting until 2025 to plan is also a risky idea. Estate Planning lawyers will be swamped. My colleagues and I learned in 2012 and 2021 how challenging it is to handle the expanded workflow from impending law changes.

As we move into 2024, now’s the ideal time to start the planning process. I urge all who want to lock in the Trump tax cuts to get in front of the work crunch that’s coming. The clock is ticking. Make it a goal to start estate planning soon and wrap it up during 2024. Years from now, you’ll celebrate the work you did to set up your family for success.

Marvin E. Blum

The Blum Family wishes you all the best for 2024!

New Year’s Resolution: Don’t Be Like Scarlett O’Hara Read More »

Math Class on How to Achieve Happiness

As we close out 2023, I remain hopeful for a happier 2024. When it comes to finding “Happiness,” Arthur Brooks has the formula. Laurie and I recently learned “The Science of Happiness” at a stimulating lecture by this best-selling author of 12 books. Brooks just released yet another book, this one co-authored with Oprah Winfrey, entitled Build the Life You Want: The Art and Science of Getting Happier. Brooks’ Harvard business school course on Happiness is always jam-packed with a long waiting list. In his lecture, Brooks identified a mathematical path to finding happiness. Let’s go back to algebra class and learn the happiness formula from Professor Brooks.

To define happiness, Brooks starts with this equation: Happiness = Enjoyment + Satisfaction + Purpose.

Happiness is not just a “feeling” you get; it is more lasting than that. Enjoyment includes a conscious awareness of pleasure in your life. Satisfaction is the joy of accomplishing a goal with effort. Purpose comes from living a life with meaning. There is so much more to happiness than just feeling joy.

Brooks takes issue with Mick Jagger’s song lyrics, “I Can’t Get No Satisfaction.” With work, you can get it, but the problem is, you can’t keep it. Once you find satisfaction, your body soon returns to equilibrium, and you lose the buzz. To sustain satisfaction, the answer isn’t to increase what you have. Instead, preserving satisfaction comes from increasing this fraction: Satisfaction = Haves ÷ Wants.

Back to math class, there are two ways to increase a fraction. One way is to increase the numerator. The other way is to decrease the denominator. Brooks favors the second way. To increase satisfaction, don’t try to increase your “haves;” better to decrease your “wants.”

Now to the third element of happiness: purpose. To achieve purpose, you must find meaning in your life. Per Brooks, “you can’t get along for even one day without meaning; you will be depressed.” To discover meaning, you need to know that you are alive for a reason. Your life matters. You have significance. To learn your “why,” Brooks poses two questions:

  • Why are you alive?
  • For what are you willing to die?

To illustrate, Brooks tells his son’s story. Not a strong student, he found his “why” in the military as a sniper. Brooks is justifiably proud of his son’s answer to question two: “my faith, my family, and the United States of America.”

Why are some people happier than others? Yet again, Brooks resorts to math: Happiness = 50% Genes + 25% Circumstances + 25% Habits.

Even if your genetics predispose you to being unhappy, you can counteract it with good habits. The next component depends on your circumstances at the time, which of course, isn’t permanent. So, the key to fighting challenging genetics and circumstances comes down to the one component you can control: habits.

My greatest takeaway from Brooks’ lecture is to actively pursue four good habits. Here’s his final equation: Faith + Family + Friends + Work = Habits for a Meaningful Happy Life.

Faith: Faith provides a way to “zoom out of yourself,” transcending your reality into a realm of spirituality. To Brooks, it is his Roman Catholic faith, but the path to spirituality doesn’t have to be through religion.

Family: This is a love you didn’t choose. It was chosen for you. Don’t disconnect from your family (except in cases of abuse). Brooks laments that one in six people in the U.S. don’t talk to their family because of politics.

Friends: There are two kinds of friends: “real” friends and “deal” friends. A deal friendship is transactional: “What can you do for me?” Deal friends are “useful.” However, the goal is to cultivate real friends—those whom you love even though they are “useless” to you.

Work: Work is essential to happiness, but only if it checks two boxes: (1) Your success was earned, not given to you; and (2) Your work serves the needs of others.

In my work of holistic (“head and heart”) estate planning, I take a much broader view of helping families. I’m still driven to help families save tax and protect assets, but I get great satisfaction from also helping families live fulfilling lives, connected with each other. I’m honored to share Arthur Brooks’ math lesson for happiness, so we need not live a life where we “can’t get no satisfaction.” Now that Professor Brooks has taught us how, here’s to getting happier in 2024!

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin and Laure Blum went back to math class and learned the key to happiness from Harvard professor and author Arthur Brooks.

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Gifts that Keep on Giving

In the holiday spirit of giving and sharing, I’d like to share with you a surprise I received from Kasia Flanagan. She brought me truly one of the best gifts I’ve ever received. Kasia owns Everyday Legacies, a company that helps families document and record their stories, whether by producing books, videos, or audio recordings. Kasia appeared at my office with a 300-page book she compiled containing my first 150 Family Legacy Planning blog posts. I am blown away by this amazing gift. It starts with my first post three years ago and proceeds week-by-week, concluding with the series I just wrote about our family’s recent trip to Israel. Reading these planning tips and Blum family highlights, I feel as if my life is flashing before my eyes. It’s very powerful to see it all pulled together in one place. I will treasure this gift forever and will pass down copies to future generations so they can also know the essence of their ancestor Marvin.

I had heard of Kasia’s excellent work, and I knew we share a passion for helping families succeed. Kasia and her team specialize in recording stories—a life story, a love story, special memories of a person, place, event, or experience. They are even running a holiday special on their 2-Hour Memoir Package if you reach out to them at www.everydaylegacies.com by the end of the year. Kasia describes a 2-hour memoir they did for a man who had just started on hospice. His story was preserved just in time. Kasia writes how touched she was by a note from the man’s son: “My mom loves the work. . . . Thanks so much—I think this really means a lot to her, more than she expected.” Kasia continues: “That message encapsulates everything we strive for—to provide connection to a family and something that they can treasure and hold on to when their loved one is gone.”

I am so honored that Kasia recognizes that I share her mission. I was moved by Kasia’s description of The Blum Firm: “More than just helping clients save money on their taxes and plan the distribution of their valuables, Marvin and his team pride themselves on providing service ‘with heart’ – helping clients see their personal legacy in a holistic way to preserve not only their material but their non-material assets as well.” Kasia’s endorsement means the world to me.

The goal of The Blum Firm’s Family Legacy Planning initiative is to help families achieve multi-generational connection. It’s so gratifying when we see the results in action. Here’s another “gift” of recognition I received a few days ago. This endorsement came from a long-time client, Janie: “Our family will be congregating for our Christmas celebration—25 adults from G1, G2, and G3, plus 10 G4’s. I can’t help but think Bill would be very pleased. I am so grateful that they all enjoy being together and because of Bill’s hard work and planning, we have the resources to make it happen. Thank you for your part in that as well.” Now I call that a multi-generational success story!

Shifting gears to the other side of the gifting equation, from receiving to giving, another gift that keeps on giving is family philanthropy. As I reflect on the highlights of 2023, one that stands out is joining with my daughter Lizzy to sign the “Jewish Future Pledge.” It’s a dark time for the Jews as we fight both a war in Israel as well as a war against skyrocketing antisemitism. One way to bring light into that darkness, as well as create some powerful family glue, is to support causes that help secure the Jewish future. The Talmud teaches: “I found a fruitful world because my ancestors planted it for me. Likewise, I am planting for my children.”

During this season of gift-giving, I urge us all to create meaningful gifts, like the one Kasia gave me and the one I am giving to my family by giving back. These are truly gifts that will keep on giving.

Wishing you all happy holidays and a brighter 2024.

Marvin E. Blum

(1) Marvin Blum is honored to receive a book compiling his first 150 blog posts from Kasia Flanagan of Everyday Legacies, truly a gift that will keep on giving! (2) For another gift that will keep on giving, Marvin Blum joins his daughter Lizzy Savetsky in signing the “Jewish Future Pledge” to help secure the future of the Jewish people.

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Will Your Grandchildren Love Their Grandchildren?

In this holiday season, our thoughts turn to our family. The goal of this Family Legacy Planning blog is to help families pass down a meaningful legacy, a heritage that connects the generations to each other. My uncle, Rabbi Leonard Oberstein, said it so beautifully 14 years ago when he presided at our daughter Lizzy’s wedding: “You and Ira are another link in the unbroken chain of our family that goes all the way back to Mount Sinai.” Each generation is a link in an unbroken chain. We pass down not just our valuables, but more importantly, our values.

My mission is to help families achieve multi-generational success. How do you measure success? My esteemed colleague Ron Aucutt offers this profound measuring tool: “You have been a success if your grandchildren love their grandchildren.” Having spent last weekend celebrating Chanukah with our five grandkids at our niece Aimee’s wedding in New Orleans, Ron’s words speak loud and clear to me. Laurie and I are giving our all to pass down our values to those precious little ones. Chief among those values is to love and care for one another. We won’t be here physically to witness if our grandchildren love their grandchildren, but our aim is to be with them spiritually as they carry on a family legacy of love, l’dor vador, from generation to generation.

Speaking of Ron Aucutt, in the estate planning profession, there are a handful of lawyers widely acknowledged as rockstars by the legal community. Without question, Ron is one of these, greatly respected for his brilliant mind and technical proficiency. Last year, Aucutt delivered the Trachtman Lecture at the Annual Meeting of ACTEC (American College of Trusts & Estate Counsel) Fellows. Aucutt’s lecture “The Calling of the Counselor in Counseling Families” was recently published in the ACTEC Law Journal (Summer 2023 edition). Aucutt’s article is a wake-up call that the estate planning lawyer’s role has expanded beyond tax planning to counseling clients on passing down a meaningful legacy. It gratifies me that a man of Ron’s stature is embracing my mission.

Aucutt urges attorneys to become caring counselors. He issues a challenge with a quote attributed to Theodore Roosevelt: “Clients want to know how much you care before they care how much you know.” It’s time to address the “heart” side of estate planning, sometimes called the “soft” side (ironic, because as Aucutt points out, it’s really the “hard” part of planning).

In a very meaningful shout-out to my own passion for this cause, Aucutt continues: “Many of our colleagues are giving emphasis to those issues, and many share their insights with the rest of us through blogs, emails, and the like. A good example is Marvin Blum in Fort Worth. He publishes by email a ‘Family Legacy Planning series’ with titles like ‘What Are Your Rose and Thorn This Week?’ And ‘What Keeps This Family Connected? The Answer May Surprise You.’”

I’m deeply honored that my weekly blog got Aucutt’s attention. When I emailed Ron to thank him, he responded: “I definitely regard the emails you regularly send out as a good model and encouragement to our colleagues to ‘see the big picture.’ Keep it up. The responses I’ve received to my lecture have reassured me that this awareness is catching on.” That’s music to my ears.

In addressing how a lawyer can go about counseling with care, Aucutt suggests we encourage regular family meetings, with the cost funded by a long-term trust (what I call a FAST Trust). Aucutt advocates for family governance, mission statements, storytelling, traditions, and philanthropy. Finally, to help a family identify and transfer a legacy of values, Aucutt distills it down to these five recommendations:

  • Spending time together,
  • Shedding tears together,
  • Sharing joys together,
  • Serving others together, and
  • Sustaining values together.

Aucutt offers tips on how to do each of these activities. Moreover, he stresses that this process applies to any family, no matter their net worth. “Shouldn’t any family, regardless of material resources, be encouraged to develop a legacy of family values?”

Thank you, Ron Aucutt, for advancing the cause of caring estate planning where we counsel clients to nourish a legacy of family values. I pledge to continue giving this initiative my best effort. And here’s praying that my grandchildren will love their grandchildren.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin and Laurie Blum are working to pass down a legacy of love to these five precious grandkids, praying that the day comes when these grandchildren will love their grandchildren.

 

Will Your Grandchildren Love Their Grandchildren? Read More »

Elderly Parents: The Difficult Conversation

In last week’s post, I explored the challenge of aging with dignity and making the most of our final innings. I concluded with the story of my mother Elsie and her successful transition from living alone in her own home to living in a beautiful community at The Stayton in Fort Worth. She would be the first to tell you what a gift it is to be free of the stresses of home maintenance, living among new friends in an elegant and welcoming environment.

When I started writing these weekly posts almost 3 years ago, I focused mostly on tips for estate planning and creating a family legacy. When I happened to share a personal story, I was surprised to learn that my readers craved more of it. In that vein, I’ll shoot straight with you and tell you that Elsie’s move wasn’t all easy. I offer this candid account to help those of you who may also be dealing with “the difficult conversation” about parents moving out of their home.

So, in the spirit of keeping it real, here’s how it went down. A few years ago, my mom fell and broke her pelvis. During the early days of her convalescence, we arranged around-the-clock care in her home. Let’s just say the experience with home caregivers was less than satisfying. Managing the frequent no-shows, weekly payments, medication rituals, etc. proved to be a nightmare. But Elsie (along with my wife Laurie and me) weathered through it. The recovery took about a year, but my mom bounced back 100%.

Then, a couple of years later, Elsie fell in her kitchen and broke her hip. During her stay in rehab, my mom once again expressed the desire to return to her home with around-the-clock caregivers. Laurie and I knew that returning to her four-level home with home healthcare was a bad idea.

I have always adored my mother and never wanted to disappoint her by telling her something she didn’t want to hear. On the other hand, a loving daughter-in-law was not as conflicted. I had to leave her rehab room and go sit outside on a bench while Laurie did the heavy lifting. My sweet but firm wife had the strength to flat-out tell her: “You can’t go home. We tried that before, and it didn’t work well.” Lesson: It’s important to have an objective third-party on the team to deliver unwelcome news, whether a daughter-in-law or an independent consultant.

Elsie’s response: “Well, if I’m not going home, then I’m moving to The Stayton.” Ironically, she’d never been there before, but she heard it was Fort Worth’s finest senior living facility. Laurie found me outside on the bench and gave me the report. In typical fashion, Laurie wasted no time. We had an appointment the following morning to go check out The Stayton. My sister-in-law Lea Ann (wife of my deceased brother Irwin) accompanied us, along with our interior designer Brad Alford (including Brad was another wise decision by Laurie).

The following morning, we convened in my mom’s rehab room before going to The Stayton. Before entering, Lea Ann hit me with a message I needed to hear: “If your brother Irwin were here, he’d just take care of this, and it would be done.” I knew she was right. Irwin was the more decisive and practical one. We loved my mom equally, but he was a more “get it done” kind of guy.

Elsie’s parting words as we left for The Stayton: “Don’t sign or commit to anything. Let’s take our time on this.” I looked at her and responded: “This is Irwin talking now. Since he’s not here to say this, I’m channeling him. If we find the right apartment, we’re going to buy it today before someone else snatches it up.” Then we left.

Lo and behold, that’s just what happened. We found the perfect apartment in the “independent living” section. Brad described it as a “jewel box.” We bought it on the spot. Brad immediately proceeded to turn it into a showplace, using the best of Elsie’s own furniture and art. A few weeks later, when my mom first saw it, it took her breath away.

Within days, Elsie’s hesitation about the move evaporated. She fell in love with her new luxurious environment, new friends, terrific food, and stimulating programming. On top of that, she certainly doesn’t miss home and yard maintenance.

Again, in the interest of full disclosure, I’ll share a comment Elsie made to Laurie after her first week: “I’m 90 years old and all my life, my only friends have been Jewish. For the first time, I’ve become friends with non-Jews, and they’re actually quite wonderful.” I already knew that, but way to go Elsie for branching out!

Okay, there you have the real story of Elsie’s move. It’s been over two years, and she’s loved every moment. The Stayton is a gift that keeps on giving, both to Elsie, and to us! I hope this story inspires others to have “difficult conversations” with your loved ones. You’re actually giving them a valuable gift.

Marvin E. Blum

(1) Marvin and Laurie Blum with Marvin’s mother Elsie, photographed in the Stayton’s fine dining room. (2) Elsie Blum’s “jewel box” apartment at The Stayton, her elegant new home.

Elderly Parents: The Difficult Conversation Read More »

Making the Most of Growing Older: Don’t Waste Your Remaining Cherries

Last week, I gave thanks for the 93rd birthday of my mother Elsie, a role model for aging with dignity. As we are about to wrap up yet another calendar year, I am contemplating how fast time flies. I know I sound old saying that, but please indulge me as I continue to explore the best approach to growing older.

I’ve written often of my admiration of Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger, the dynamic duo who lead Berkshire Hathaway, still going strong at ages 93 and 99. On the flip side of the aging story, a couple of my recent posts tell the story of the painful decline of Senator Dianne Feinstein, who recently died at age 90. Whether our final innings resemble Elsie and Buffett/Munger or Feinstein is largely out of our control. But, as we age, there are quality of life aspects that are within our power. What’s the playbook for making the most of our final years?

I wrote last week of The Book of Charlie by David Von Drehle, recounting the story of his neighbor Charlie Smith who lived to 109. As I explained in that post, Charlie found contentment by moving from stage one of life (when he was a “complexifier”) to stage two (when he was a “simplifier”). By simplifying his playbook, Charlie let go of things not in his power, and focused on things he could control: “his own actions, his own emotions, his outlook, his grit.” Charlie’s philosophy boiled down to making good decisions. “For all the books on all the shelves of all the world’s libraries, life must be lived as a series of discrete moments and individual decisions. What we face might be complicated, but what we do about it is simple.” Per Charlie, it’s this simple: “Do the right thing.”

Former Major League Baseball Commissioner Fay Vincent echoes this theme of making good decisions in his essay “Old Age Is Like a Debenture” in The Wall Street Journal. Vincent teaches the importance of knowing “when and how to leave each stage of life.” Baseball legends Joe DiMaggio and Ted Williams (whose final at-bat was a home run) knew how to “do the right thing.” Willie Mays and Yogi Berra didn’t—they kept trying to play after their skills had declined. Opera singer Beverly Sills got it right: “I know that to continue would not be worthy of what my audience deserved.” By knowing when to fold ’em, we can move elegantly into that second stage where we simplify life, as we ”surrender those things that are risky, silly, or just plain stupid.” DiMaggio, Williams, and Sills are role models for making a graceful transition from stage one to stage two.

An essential element of living an enriched life during the second stage is to cultivate quality relationships. Studies show that those who enjoy socialization and meaningful relationships live lives that are longer and healthier (both physically and mentally). I’ve written before of my close connection with about 20 of my law school classmates who travel together regularly and are in touch with each other daily. Because of our annual canoe outings, we call ourselves the “Canoe Brothers.” My dear friend (and fellow Canoe Brother) Bill Parrish shared a poem with me that puts an exclamation point on the goals of spending time with quality people and simplifying our lives as we age. It’s titled “The Valuable Time of Maturity.”

“…I have more past than future.
I feel like that boy who got a bowl of cherries—
At first, he gobbled them,
But when he realized there were only a few left,
He began to taste them intensely.
I no longer have time to deal with mediocrity.

I do not want to be in meetings where flamed egos parade.
…I want to live close to human people, very human, away from those filled with self-importance.
…I’m in a hurry to live with the intensity that only maturity can give.
I do not intend to waste any of the remaining cherries.”

For those of us aiming to enjoy intensely our remaining cherries, Elizabeth O’Brien offers more words of wisdom in a Barron’s article earlier this year. She says to continue to find your life’s purpose. “Having a reason to get out of bed in the morning is key for emotional and physical health.” Some do this by continuing to work well into their 80’s. But if staying on the job into your octogenarian years isn’t right for you, I reiterate the example of my 93-year-old mother Elsie. Elsie is taking more of the Charlie Smith approach to fulfillment, simplifying her life and focusing on relationships and human interaction. By taking the step to move from living alone in her home to a beautiful community at The Stayton in Fort Worth, she has made many new friends, participates in stimulating programs, and never dines alone. By staying engaged and interactive, Elsie looks and feels decades younger than 93.

As we age, I invite you to join the Canoe Brothers and Elsie in making the most of our senior years and intensely enjoying each remaining cherry.

One more thing: Over the Thanksgiving holiday, a dear family friend, age 44, was tragically killed in a car accident along with his two kids. We are heartbroken. Let’s start savoring life’s cherries even before we grow old. We never know what tomorrow brings. Life is precious and fragile.

Marvin E. Blum

Pictured above: Marvin Blum (shortest) and Bill Parrish (tallest) intensely enjoying life’s cherries on a recent Canoe Brothers trip. Thanks to Bill for sharing the poem “The Valuable Time of Maturity” about tasting intensely each of life’s remaining cherries.

 

Making the Most of Growing Older: Don’t Waste Your Remaining Cherries Read More »

Thanksgiving Blessing: Elsie’s 93rd

Thanksgiving is a perfect time to count our blessings. Doing that is easy for me this week, as yesterday marked the 93rd birthday of my remarkable mother Elsie. Thankfully, Elsie is going strong at 93 and a role model for how to age with dignity. I’ll draw from the example of my mom in reflecting on the gifts that old age can bring.

In The Book of Charlie, David Von Drehle draws wisdom from his neighbor Charlie Smith who lived to 109. One aspect of aging successfully is to transition gracefully from stage one of life to stage two. Per Drehle, “a life well-led consists of two parts. In the first, we are complexifiers. We take the simple world of childhood and discover its complications. . . . Then, if we live long enough, we might soften into the second stage and become simplifiers.” Charlie Smith found contentment by simplifying his playbook to these four words from his mother: “Do the right thing.”

Charlie indeed lived by that simple motto, but he elaborated. When he died, Charlie left behind a single sheet of paper on which he boiled down 109 years into an “operating code of life,” as summarized in an opinion piece in The Washington Post on May 28, 2023.

  • As Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl taught, “everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.” Charlie chose to be positive. He “didn’t have time to be sad.”
  • “Smile often. Forgive and seek forgiveness. Feel deeply. Tell loved ones how you feel.”
  • “Be soft sometimes. Cry when you need to. Observe miracles.”

Elsie’s approach to old age comes straight out of Charlie Smith’s playbook. Here’s how Elsie exemplifies the above three points in Charlie’s operating code:

  1. As a first-generation American, Elsie was raised by survivors like Viktor Frankl who trained her to approach life with a positive attitude. Rather than wallowing in self-pity that Hitler deprived them of their youth and murdered many of their loved ones, Elsie and her family counted their blessings for their life in America. Her Uncle Joe lived an enormously difficult life but always had a smile on his face, a song on his lips, and repeatedly said: “I never had a bad day in America.” Elsie lost a son, Irwin, to cancer when he was only 65, endured many other hardships, but she chooses to have a positive attitude every day. It’s a choice.
  2. Like Charlie, Elsie indeed smiles often, feels deeply, and tells us daily how much she loves us. Spoken in her deep southern accent, one of her favorite lines to me is “You are loved.” She told me she got that line from Lady Bird Johnson, and Elsie sounds just like Lady Bird when she says it.
  3. Observe miracles. Well, indeed the very fact that Elsie is alive is a miracle. The same Uncle Joe mentioned above is the patriarch of our family and the one who saved us from the Nazis. As a young boy, Joe (“Yossi”) Weinstock, made the courageous journey alone to America. He pushed a fruit cart from house-to-house in Montgomery, Alabama, saving enough to get a visa to bring over his parents and younger siblings, including Elsie’s mother Pauline. He couldn’t get his two older siblings on the family visa because they were married, so Hitler got them instead. But rescuing Pauline brought into the world the miracle of Elsie, now age 93! Elsie’s family tree now includes a spirited group of descendants who are giving our all to fight (once again) for the survival of the Jewish people.

So as generations of our family sit around the Thanksgiving table this year, it will be easy for us to be thankful for the miracle of our 93-years-young matriarch Elsie.

Marvin E. Blum

(1) Marvin Blum’s mother Elsie, celebrating her 93rd birthday this week, is a beautiful Thanksgiving blessing to the Blum family. (2) At the head of the table is Eliezer Weinstock, Marvin Blum’s “Zaidy.” To the right is Uncle Joe Weinstock (and his wife Rose), the patriarch who rescued his family from the Holocaust. Far right is Elsie Blum (now 93), her baby son Irwin, and her little brother Leonard (now Rabbi Oberstein). To the left is Elsie’s mother Pauline, Elsie’s father Meyer, and two more of Elsie’s brothers. This picture tells a miraculous story of survival.

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The “New” IRS: No Longer “Kinder and Gentler”

Ever since the Inflation Reduction Act passed allocating $80 billion to the IRS, we’ve wondered what the impact would be. I can still hear President George H. W. Bush promising a “kinder and gentler” IRS a few years ago. That’s no longer what the government is promising us. When Congress struck a debt ceiling deal in June, Republicans succeeded in stripping away $20 billion of the $80 billion. That still leaves $60 billion to beef up the IRS. How will they spend it?

On September 8, 2023, we learned the plan. Here are some highlights:

  • Increased scrutiny of those earning over $1 million or owing tax of over $250,000.
  • Full audits of the 75 largest partnerships in the U.S., as well as other large partnerships with balance sheet discrepancies, or where asset valuations appear inflated or deflated.
  • Sending compliance letters to about 500 other partnerships (hedge funds, real estate, large law firms, publicly traded partnerships) and auditing those with unsatisfactory responses.
  • Special attention to digital assets and currency exchanges through the “Virtual Currency Compliance Campaign.”
  • Added efforts to audit owners of foreign bank accounts (FBAR reports).
  • Hiring some 3,700 more auditors to do this work under a new unit for the audit of complex tax returns.
  • Using Artificial Intelligence to help select those most likely to be tax cheats (just imagine all the possibilities advanced technology provides the IRS).

The IRS is aiming to close a tax gap of $700 billion that it believes goes uncollected each year.

The Blum Firm is here for you if you are targeted by this beefed-up IRS. Indeed, we have likewise “beefed-up” our team of tax lawyers with the recent addition of Christopher Beck to our tax staff. Christopher joined us from Boston with over 15 years of experience in tax controversy work.

So, if you are contacted by someone who says, “I’m from the government, and I’m here to help you,” please know that The Blum Firm also stands ready to really help you.

Marvin E. Blum

In preparing this post, Marvin acknowledges the help of Susan Lipp’s Wealth Management article “IRS Targets Large Partnerships and Millionaires” as well as Barron’s article “IRS Steps Up Audits of Partnerships, Wealthy Individuals.” 

With the October 15 tax deadline just behind us, Marvin Blum warns that dealing with the “new” beefed-up IRS is about to get even more complicated.

The “New” IRS: No Longer “Kinder and Gentler” Read More »

Israel Wrap-up: Discovering Our Roots

I was listening to an interview of my daughter Lizzy Savetsky when she was asked: “What keeps you from blowing away when the winds of misfortune come your way?” Lizzy’s answer: “It’s our deep roots. We get those roots from knowing about our ancestors and the stories of how they survived adversity.” Each of us will be an ancestor; but more importantly, each of us is also a descendant. Those roots give us, as descendants, the strength to not only survive, but to thrive. We owe it to our ancestors. In this series on Family Legacy Planning, I have often stressed the importance of knowing our ancestors and their stories. Families that know where they come from have stronger family glue. Research shows that the more we know about our ancestors, the higher our self-esteem and the better equipped we are to overcome adversity. Indeed, it’s our roots that ground us and keep us from blowing away.

For the Blum family, our trip to Israel provided us a deeper connection to our roots than I’d ever imagined. As Jews, Israel is our ancestral homeland going back to biblical times. I knew the stories of King David capturing Jerusalem 3,000 years ago, and the continuous presence of the Jews in the Land of Israel since that time. What blew my mind on this trip was a visit to the City of David. When I saw that on our agenda, I questioned why I’d never been there before on previous trips. What I learned is that the archeological discovery of King David’s palace in Jerusalem is fairly new. It’s only in recent years that we now have new physical evidence that further proves the biblical connection of King David to Jerusalem. That tour didn’t exist on my prior trips to Israel.

Just south of the site where King Solomon’s Temple stood is now the City of David, the location of King David’s palace. It is an active archaeological dig. In recent years, they discovered a wall that is 15 feet wide. Given the width of the wall, it was clear it wasn’t surrounding an ordinary home. Then archaeologists located a corner of the wall, where the wall shifted from north-south to east-west. Within that wall, they discovered evidence of palace life. Then a monumental discovery occurred to identify the palace’s origins as belonging to King David and his descendants. They found a signet ring bearing the seal of King Hezekiah, a direct descendant of King David. By connecting dots, a whole history of King David’s palace was unearthed. They found a great pool (a “mikvah”) at the bottom of the hill where travelers would cleanse themselves before journeying up the road, past the palace, to the steps leading to the Holy Temple. The road is fully revealed now, as are the steps. The step heights are uneven, making it hard to scale up them at a fast pace. The teaching is that the uneven steps forced the worshippers to slow down and contemplate the significance of their ascent to the Holy Temple.

At the site of the Holy Temple, we studied stone ruins thousands of years old inscribed with Hebrew letters. The Hebrew language of that inscription is the same language spoken by our people today, a thread that connects Jews of today to Jews of the Bible. As the attached photo shows, our granddaughter Stella was able to read to us those Hebrew words, telling of the sounding of the shofar (trumpet) blasts to call Jews to Sabbath worship on Friday afternoons. Each of us could feel our roots growing deeper into that ancestral homeland as Stella read those ancient Hebrew words aloud to us.

Since the time of King David, there have been a series of conquerors who attempted to destroy the Jewish people and rob us of our homeland, but none prevailed. Even after the efforts of Ancient Egyptians, Philistines, Assyrians, Babylonians, Ancient Greeks, Romans, Byzantines, Crusaders, and even today, Hamas, we’re still here. We’re a small people but with a powerful will to survive. We must survive. This is our home, and as Golda Meir reminded us, we have nowhere else to go. Our roots are here, and those roots run very deep. The Israel national anthem Hatikvah (a song of Hope) concludes with the hope of more than 2,000 years: “Lih-yot am chofshi b’ar-tzeinu, Eretz Tziyyon v’Yerushalyaim – To be a free people in our land, the land of Zion and Jerusalem.”

This post wraps up my five-part series on our trip to Israel. It was life changing. We will never be the same. But now more than ever, our family knows our roots and the responsibility of carrying on the heritage our ancestors bequeathed to us. We come from an unbroken chain that goes all the way back to King David and the children of Israel. Laurie and I feel that responsibility, but more importantly, so do our children and grandchildren.

With the world now in a very dark place, it’s our prayer that we look upwards and find the Light that will bring us to a brighter future.

Marvin E. Blum

(1) Ira, Stella, and Lizzy Savetsky and Laurie and Marvin Blum standing at the site of King David’s palace, looking out at the south wall that surrounded King Solomon’s Holy Temple. (2) Ira, Stella, and Lizzy Savetsky, Laurie and Marvin Blum, and tour guide Yoni Zierler at the Jerusalem Archaeological Park learning about the Jews’ biblical roots in the Land of Israel. (3) Marvin Blum’s granddaughter Stella reading the ancient Hebrew inscription on archaeological ruins thousands of years old, with tour guide Yoni Zierler teaching the significance of these findings. (4) The Blum family’s tour guide Yoni Zierler today, having traded in his tour book for weaponry as he protects our homeland of Israel from yet another force that seeks to destroy us.

 

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Update on Lizzy: Life Is Precious & Fragile

Those of you who are regular readers of my weekly posts are aware that my daughter Lizzy Savetsky is an outspoken activist supporting Israel and the Jews. Laurie and I are very proud of her advocacy and courage, and we applaud the hard work she does to get out the truth.

Earlier this week, Lizzy was returning from a meeting as the cab pulled up to let her out in front of her apartment. Lizzy stepped out of the cab into a bike lane, looked both ways, and seeing no bikes coming, she exited the cab. She was on the phone at that point with my wife Laurie when Laurie suddenly heard a scream. Lizzy had been hit by a fast-driving car that had swerved into the bike lane and accidentally hit her. Laurie screamed back “Are you ok?” Lizzy’s answer: “No! I’ve been hit by a car!”

Laurie immediately called Lizzy’s husband Ira who rushed down to the scene. By then, people were gathering who feared she was dead. The collision was that bad. An ambulance rushed Lizzy to nearby Cornell Hospital. She received excellent emergency care there, and six long hours later, Laurie and I finally got word about her condition. Lizzy suffered a concussion and scalp laceration requiring staples, a broken ankle, and other injuries. But the bottom line is that she is now on the mend and will be fine. We are beyond relieved and grateful.

As those who know Lizzy might suspect, this accident is doing nothing to slow her down. She got right back on social media to tell the world the information we need to know about what is happening in Israel. You can’t keep her down. Some suggested she cancel speeches next week in Greenwich and Baltimore, but she refuses to let this accident stop her. Lizzy is a soldier on a mission, and she has work to do!

We are living in turbulent times. May we all embrace the importance of having our affairs in order, as life is uncertain.

Marvin E. Blum

(1) Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky now on the mend after being hit by a car. Nothing stops Lizzy from spreading the message on her shirt: “Am Yisrael Chai”—the people of Israel live! (2) Ever mindful of the cause, Lizzy chose Israel blue for the color of her cast!

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Our Week in Israel: A Family on a Mission

In this weekly Family Legacy Planning series, I have often stressed the importance of a Family Mission Statement. Knowing who you are and what you stand for anchors a family. A succinct and memorable mission statement gives family members a core and connects them with each other.

In past posts, I have shared that the Blum Family Mission Statement includes the values of relationships, memorable moments, and spirituality. Our trip to Israel a few weeks ago checked every one of those boxes. We connected with family & friends who live in Israel. We made lifetime memories with our daughter Lizzy, her husband Ira, and their 3 kids. But today I want to focus on the spiritual aspect of the trip.

In the article “How to Make Life More Transcendent” in The Atlantic, Arthur Brooks endorses the importance of building spiritual moments into our lives. “Spiritual experiences—traditionally religious or otherwise—give us unique insights into life and positive benefits we simply can’t get elsewhere . . . . People often engage in religious and spiritual behaviors because they want to understand life’s meaning in a confusing world.” Given that our wondrous trip ended with a vicious attack aimed at destroying Israel, Brooks’ words ring truer than ever. Indeed, I look back on the spiritual insights we gained to try to make some sense of this very confusing world we now inhabit. I refuse to allow terrorists to rob me of the spiritual “sense of awe, a feeling of oneness with others or the divine” that Brooks describes.

We were in Israel during the week of Sukkot, the Feast of Tabernacles, a holiday celebrating the harvest and the miraculous protection G-d provided the children of Israel when we escaped slavery in Egypt. Sukkot begins five days after Yom Kippur. It culminates with Simchat Torah, the day when we complete the one-year cycle of reading the Torah. This time of year is the holiest few weeks in the Jewish calendar. Sukkot is the most popular time of year to be in Israel. The country is literally packed with visitors from around the world. Celebrating while feeling a physical connection to the land of our Biblical roots heightens the spiritual experience.

For Jews, the holiest site in the world is at the Western Wall in the Old City of Jerusalem, a section of the wall that surrounded the Holy Temple. That portion of the wall remains after the Temple was destroyed in the year 70 C.E. Prior to Israel’s victory in the Six Day War of 1967, Jews were deprived access to the Wall and the holiest areas of Jerusalem. Regaining access to those sites is one of the highlights of my lifetime. Upon reclaiming the holy city, Israel renamed the Wall from the “Wailing Wall” to the “Western Wall,” a tribute to the end of an era of wailing and longing for that return. A highlight of any Israel journey is to pray at the Western Wall. As the attached photo shows, we went to the Wall immediately after my 3-year-old grandson Ollie’s upsherin (first haircut) to praise G-d for this new chapter in Ollie’s life.

We returned to the Wall a couple of days later for another spiritual highlight. There are only two days each year when there is a mass gathering at the Wall called Birkat Kohanim (the Priestly Blessing), once during Sukkot and once during Passover. On those days, thousands upon thousands of Kohanim (Jews who descend from Moses’ brother Aaron, whose sons served as priests in the Holy Temple) congregate at the Wall to deliver the blessing. We were honored to witness the religious service from a rooftop balcony overlooking the Wall, a memory that is now forever woven into the fabric of our family.

It is not lost on me that Hamas’ surprise attack came on one of our most religious days of the year. The goal of catching Israel off-guard conjures up painful memories of the last surprise attack, 50 years ago to the day, the Yom Kippur War of 1973. I remember receiving the news while praying in our synagogue that Egypt and Syria invaded Israel on our holiest day of the year. It is also not lost on me that the October 7 attack came at a time when the country was jam-packed with visitors, the busiest tourist season of the year. The timing only adds to the brutality of the invasion. All airlines except the Israel-owned El Al immediately ceased operating. Many of those tourists are still trapped in Israel.

As part of my spirituality, I believe in miracles from heaven. Indeed, our trip brought us a series of miracles, both large and small. On the small end, the trip began with a miracle arrival at the King David Hotel in Jerusalem. Lizzy’s family flew to Israel a few days before Laurie and me so they could enjoy some time on the beach in Tel Aviv. We never discussed what time we hoped to arrive at the King David Hotel, aware that there were too many unknowns to predict an arrival time with any accuracy. Our car drove up to the hotel front door, and as I exited the car, a car pulled up behind me and I heard shouts of “Zaidy!” from my grandkids’ voices. Without any effort to coordinate, we arrived at exactly the same moment. Another miracle is that Laurie and I happened to leave Israel on one of the last American Airlines flights before air service ceased, arriving home only hours before the attack. Otherwise, we might still be there trying to get home. Miracle three is that Ira had booked their flights on El Al, even though more expensive, in order to support Israeli businesses. Because of that miracle, they were booked on a flight leaving two days after the attack on the only airline still operating. Otherwise, they might still be trying to get home.

But the biggest miracle of all is the way that Lizzy’s family managed to escape and return home safely. After spending time on-and-off in bomb shelters during their final two days, they made the harrowing journey from Jerusalem across Israel to Ben Gurion airport near Tel Aviv, risking terrorist attacks along the way. Laurie and I breathed a sigh of relief when Ira’s text arrived that they made it to the airport, got through security, and boarded the plane. Just then, news reports announced that Ben Gurion Airport was under attack, with missiles coming in from Gaza. The airport went into lockdown, but they were stuck on the plane, grounded. Laurie and I prayed and paced, then the biggest miracle occurred. We learned that the El Al pilots, trained in the Israel Air Force, turned off all lights outside and inside the plane, closed all window shades, shut down all internet communication, and took off just after midnight on a darkened runway, flying north to Haifa instead of west, and circling around until the plane was safely over the Mediterranean Sea. At that point, we received the best text of our lives from Lizzy, informing us the lights were back on and they were out over the water, safe from attack. How do you spell R-E-L-I-E-F? Laurie and I collapsed with thankfulness to G-d for this miracle.

In the Book of Esther, G-d placed Queen Esther in her role to save the Jews “for such a time as this: for if you remain silent at this time . . . you and your father’s family will perish.” When Lizzy’s plane landed, she was directed straight to a television studio for two live interviews on national news shows. She has since been on ten more national and international telecasts, along with giving numerous speeches in New York, as well as Montreal and St. Louis. More speeches and TV appearances are coming. Lizzy’s spirituality has generated a calling in her to become one of the strongest voices in the world to support Israel and fight against anti-semitism. It brings me immeasurable gratitude to see our family’s focus on spirituality carried on to the next generation, and we can already see that Generation Two is passing down that legacy to Generation Three. As we say in Hebrew, L’dor Vador, from one generation to another.

Marvin E. Blum

(For news coverage of the family’s escape from Israel, click on this link for a radio interview with Marvin Blum and on this or this link for an article in the Fort Worth Star-Telegram.)

(1) Marvin and Laurie Blum with daughter Lizzy Savetsky and her family, enjoying a trip to Israel that mirrors the Blum Family Mission Statement to celebrate relationships, memorable moments, and spirituality. (2) Marvin Blum’s son-in-law Ira Savetsky with his son Ollie, praising G-d at the Western Wall for the new chapter in Ollie’s life after his upsherin (first haircut). (3) Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky on a Jerusalem balcony overlooking the spiritual service of Birkat Kohanim (Priestly Blessing) at the Western Wall. (4) Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky and her family arrive in Israel on El Al Airlines for a trip celebrating the holiday of Sukkot.

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Pay Attention to the Signs: Learning Warning Signs from Vishniak’s Pre-Holocaust Europe

I wrote last week about our impactful visit to Yad Vashem, Israel’s Holocaust Memorial, on our trip a couple of weeks ago to Israel. The night before that tour, we had a powerful prelude to set us up for the experience. We attended the world premier of a documentary produced by Nancy Spielberg, sister of Steven Spielberg, entitled “Vishniak.” The film tells the story of renowned scientist and photographer, Mark Vishniak. Vishniak’s gift to the world was a collection of photos documenting the propaganda campaign against the Jews in pre-Holocaust Europe.

Vishniak was born into an intellectual Jewish family in Russia in 1883. His family emigrated to Berlin in 1917 when the Bolshevik Revolution made it unsafe for Jews in Russia. At that time, Berlin was a haven for Jews. It was a center of art, scholarship, and culture that embraced and celebrated Jewish talents. However, Vishniak’s honeymoon period in Berlin began to wane as Adolph Hitler began a gradual campaign to convince the general populace of Germans that all their ills and misfortunes were the fault of the Jews. His message was that Jews controlled everything, and therefore any negatives in their lives were brought about by Jewish greed. Hitler’s venom spread slowly at first, starting in schools to indoctrinate the young against Jews, and growing into boycotting Jewish-owned enterprises. While this was happening, Vishniak had the foresight to begin photographing evidence of the growing hate. Signs were popping up condemning Jews, with caricatures exaggerating Jewish noses and making Jews look evil and ugly. When it became illegal for Vishniak to take pictures of those posters, he strategically posed his daughter in front, with the signs off to the side in the background, claiming he was photographing his little girl.

When Vishniak was in Eastern Europe photographing the growing horrors of life for Jews in ghettos, soldiers came to his Berlin home to arrest him. His wife got word to him not to return, and he re-routed to Paris. Kristallnacht, “the night of broken glass,” erupted in Germany and Austria on November 9-10, 1938, destroying Jewish businesses and burning sacred books. The family decided it was time to try to come to America. Though it was almost impossible to get a visa for the family, luck had it that his wife’s birth country was Latvia. She managed to obtain a Latvian visa to America that covered herself, her husband, and her son and daughter. The Vishniaks settled in New York, where he preserved his photographic collection revealing the horrors of pre-Holocaust life for Jews in Europe.

What is especially significant about the Vishniak story is that the Holocaust didn’t happen all-of-a-sudden. There was a gradual building up of hate. In all candor, that seems eerily familiar to today’s world. Anti-semitism is at an all-time high. The Anti-Defamation League reports that acts of anti-semitism in the U.S. rose 36% in 2022. The rise in attacks against visibly identifiable Orthodox Jews rose 69% in 2022. Since the outbreak of war in Israel, antisemitism is skyrocketing. Antisemitic posts online have increased 1200% since the October 7 attack on Israel by Hamas. College campuses across the U.S. are hotbeds for fomenting hate against Jews. Anti-Jewish speakers are welcomed on school campuses, making Jewish students feel unsafe. It’s happening at Harvard, Penn, NYU, Stanford, Berkeley, Michigan, Cornell, and likely in your own backyard, no matter where you live. Celebrities are asserting that Jews control the media, business, and the entertainment industry, blaming Jews for your misfortune. Rallies are even calling for the extermination of Jews. Is this beginning to sound familiar?

My son-in-law Ira Savetsky had a very wise uncle, Adolph Feuerstein (“Unkie”), a Holocaust survivor. Unkie warned repeatedly: “You say you’re comfortable in America. Well, let me tell you something. We were comfortable in Europe too.” Then look what happened.

We need to heed the warning signs. Hamas has been saying since its first charter in 1988 that its mission is to “obliterate” Israel. This vicious attack is not coming out-of-the-blue. We have been told over and over again that Hamas wants to kill all Jews. My wife Laurie had an intellectual Aunt Marjorie Cooper who lived in Haifa, Israel. I once asked Aunt Marjorie to explain the lesson of the Holocaust. Typically very erudite and poetic in her choice of words, she boiled down her answer to these few words: “The lesson of the Holocaust is that when someone says they want to kill you, you should believe them.” It’s as simple as that.

We are living in dangerous times. We must look out for each other and be vigilant. It’s time to pay attention to the signs.

Some might question what this post has to do with my “Family Legacy Planning” weekly series. Legacy planning is the process of creating a meaningful heritage to pass down to our descendants, leaving them an inheritance that’s more than money. Those of us who care feel we owe it to our future generations to leave them a tomorrow with hope, love, and family connection. I think this post fits right in.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum and son-in-law Ira Savetsky with Nancy Spielberg, Executive Producer of the documentary “Vishniak,” revealing the warning signs in pre-Holocaust Europe.

Pay Attention to the Signs: Learning Warning Signs from Vishniak’s Pre-Holocaust Europe Read More »

What I Learned at Yad Vashem, Israel’s Holocaust Memorial

As promised last week, I will continue sharing highlights and lessons learned from our week in Israel, a glorious week that came to a horrifying end as Hamas began a terror campaign aimed at eliminating Israel. Realizing that the goal of Hamas is to wipe Israel off the map, I reflect on why Israel must win this war, indeed why the world NEEDS Israel. We spent a day at Yad Vashem, Israel’s Holocaust Memorial. I’ll unpack some of the heart-wrenching revelations I learned there, but I’ll start with the overarching lesson from Yad Vashem: the six million Jews who were murdered had no place to go; other countries didn’t want them, and there was no Israel to take them in. Most say Israel exists now because the Holocaust happened. The reality is that the Holocaust happened because Israel didn’t exist.

The day began with my 10-year-old granddaughter Stella interviewing Rena Quint, a Holocaust survivor. Stella is embarking on a mission to teach the world, and young people in particular, about the Holocaust. She was alarmed to learn of the multitudes that either (1) believe the Holocaust is a hoax that never really happened or (2) have never heard of it and have no idea what it is. Unless we learn from history, we are doomed to repeat it.

Stella discovered that when Rena was Stella’s age, she had spent most of her childhood in a ghetto, a work camp, concentration camps, and a death march. Born in 1935 in Poland, Rena’s early years were spent in a loving home with her mother, father, and two brothers. Her entire family was murdered in the Holocaust; only she survived. She remembers the day her mother let go of her hand and told her to run. That day, the rest of her family went to their deaths. Rena was ultimately imprisoned in Bergen-Belsen concentration camp in April 1945. She managed to stay alive until the camp was liberated by the British. But there she was, a little girl Stella’s age, all alone in the world. Hearing Rena’s story of survival, strength, and faith propels Stella in her quest to educate us on where unchecked evil can lead. Indeed, after Stella ended her stay in Israel in a bomb shelter, her mission has become more critical than ever.

At Yad Vashem, we learned of another little girl Stella’s age. The story was told to us as we looked in a display case at a beautiful long braid of blonde hair that had once belonged to that little girl. As Nazis were coming for the family, the little girl’s mother convinced her daughter that where they were going, her long golden hair would become infected with lice. Her mother cut off the long braid, gave it to their neighbor (along with all their precious possessions) to hold until someday they’d return to retrieve them. The only family member to survive was the little girl’s brother. Years later, he returned to the neighbor to ask for his sister’s hair. They wouldn’t let him in, as they didn’t want to turn over the family’s silver, china, jewelry, and other precious items. The boy stood at the door and begged; he only wanted his sister’s hair. They could keep the rest. They slipped the braid through the door and then shut him out. He left with a priceless memory of his sister that he later donated to Yad Vashem, the Holocaust Memorial.

The tour then became very personal to Stella as she learned the fate of her father Ira’s family from Czechoslovakia. Ira’s ancestors were part of a desperation campaign by Hitler to kill as many Jews, as quickly as possible, when it became evident that they were going to lose the war. Hitler appointed Adolph Eichmann to mastermind the murder of 500,000 Hungarian and Czechoslovakian Jews in only 56 days. A number of Ira’s relatives were sent in cattle cars to Auschwitz, including his grandmother Miriam. Her job at Auschwitz was to sort the clothing of those who were sent into gas chambers. Miriam survived to tell the horror that, in sorting the clothes, she discovered her mother’s monogrammed head scarf. That’s how she learned that her mother (Ira’s great grandmother) had been gassed to death.

Our tour ended with a search through the Book of Names of Holocaust Victims, Yad Vashem’s chronicle of every known victim of the Holocaust. In that book, my son-in-law Ira discovered the name of his great uncle Yaakov Yitzchok Feuerstein, the man for whom Ira (Yitzchok in Hebrew) was named. Ira’s uncle was murdered at Majdanek concentration camp, along with his wife and baby.

Why do we need Israel today? When Ira’s family was part of the 500,000 Jews killed late in the war, the world by then was well-aware of the concentration camp killings. Nothing was done to save them. As Hitler’s Jew-hatred was spreading and Jews wanted out, no country would take them, except in small numbers. Hitler killed 6 million of Europe’s 9 million Jews, and 1.5 million of those killed were children. England reluctantly agreed to take in 10,000 kids, who had to come without their parents (imagine the fears of those kids and agony of their parents having to tell them goodbye, never to see them again). Had there been an Israel, there would have been a place to go. Today, Jews have a place to go. Israel, our ancestral homeland dating back to early Biblical days, will take us in. Today, more than half of the world’s Jews live in Israel.

The most effective way to wipe out a race is to kill all the kids. Hitler tried to do that. It’s taking decades to rebuild the Jewish population. Even today, the number of Jews is still not yet restored to the pre-Holocaust level. For most of their lives, survivors like Rena Quint missed out on the experience of sitting at a Shabbat table with three generations of a family. We are just now getting back to that.

So here we are again with enemies whose stated goal is to push us into the sea. Our tour guide at Yad Vashem told Stella, three days before the attack, that she was living in the best of times, that she would never see something as horrible as a Holocaust. The guide was wrong. Stella’s week in Israel was followed by the greatest loss of Jewish life since the Holocaust. But, this time, we have an Israel that has the might and fight to prevail. Israel must win this war. We owe it to Stella to give her a better future than her ancestors had. I call this weekly email series a “Family Legacy Planning” series. Stella is doing her part to preserve the legacy of her ancestors. Now that’s what I call Family Legacy Planning!

Marvin E. Blum

(1) Marvin and Laurie Blum with daughter Lizzy, granddaughter Stella, and son-in-law Ira Savetsky at Yad Vashem, Israel’s Holocaust Memorial. (2) Stella Savetsky interviewing Rena Quint, a Holocaust survivor. (3) Ira Savetsky discovering the name of his great uncle, a Holocaust victim for whom Ira was named. (4) Ira and Lizzy Savetsky entering “The Book of Names of Holocaust Victims” at Yad Vashem. The Savetsky family preserves the legacy of departed ancestors by leading an effort to fight anti-semitism.

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A Week in Israel: From Highest Highs to Lowest Lows

I just returned from a dream week in Israel that ended in a nightmare. I am still wrapping my head around the highs and lows of this trip to the Holy Land. As my thoughts settle down, I’ll share more of the experiences and lessons learned. For today, I’ll sum it up by saying that my life, and the lives of so many, has been forever changed. I now see the world through a different lens.

The week began with a glorious rooftop celebration overlooking the holiest sites in the Old City of Jerusalem. The occasion was an “upsherin,” the Yiddish word for a Jewish boy’s first haircut upon reaching his third birthday. The boy is my grandson Ollie, son of my daughter and son-in-law, Lizzy and Ira Savetsky. As the attached photo reflects, it was a grand celebration.

Fast forward one week. The man playing guitar in the far left of the photo is now on the front lines as a soldier in the Israeli Defense Forces, protecting Israel from attacks coming in from the north. His name is Noam, and he’s still singing. This time, his music is aimed at lifting the spirits of those fighting to save Israel. But this time he has a guitar in front of his body and a gun on his back. What a juxtaposition. What a difference a week makes!

There are so many “highs” from the week celebrating the Jewish holiday of Sukkot, both literally and figuratively. We stood on the top of Mount Moriah and worshipped where our ancestors prayed at the site of King Solomon’s Holy Temple. We toured archaeological digs where they recently discovered King David’s palace. We visited with family members and friends who share our passion for the miracle of Israel.

There were also literal and figurative lows. We visited the Dead Sea, “the lowest place on earth.” We looked down at the valleys flanking either side of the City of David. But from a figurative standpoint, the lowest low for our family was in a basement bomb shelter at the King David Hotel. As the photo reflects, my son-in-law Ira was helping lead the prayers and singing, while my daughter and her kids prayed along fervently. But still they were singing. Singing provides us with hope. We have to find light in every dark moment.

I will continue to share more highlights in future posts, but today I wanted to share these quick heartfelt reflections. We are grateful that we all made it home safely, but our hearts are still with our brothers and sisters in Israel. We pray for their safety. We pray they will someday live in peace. Spending a week in a country that is so narrow you can drive from east to west in about an hour (15 minutes in some places), surrounded by enemies who want to eradicate you, certainly has made a permanent impact on me. Those of us who live in safety truly have no problems, as the things we consider to be a “problem” pale by comparison to the challenges faced by my family is Israel.

I’ll close with three Hebrew words from a favorite song we chant: “Am Yisroel Chai” – the People of Israel Live!

Marvin E. Blum

(1) Marvin Blum and his family celebrating grandson Ollie’s upsherin, his first haircut, overlooking the Holy City of Jerusalem. 
Middle Picture: Noam Buskila (the same singer at the far left of Ollie’s upsherin photo) now sings to bring hope to the Israel Defense Forces, guitar in his front and gun on his back. What a difference a week makes! (2) In a bomb shelter at the King David Hotel, Marvin Blum’s son-in-law Ira Savetsky (far right) leads worship services, while daughter Lizzy and granddaughters Stella & Juliet (lower left) join in the songs of prayer. 

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Senator Feinstein’s Other Battle, Through the Eyes of President Reagan’s Daughter

Senator Dianne Feinstein, who died last week, was the longest serving woman in the U.S. Senate. Last week’s post told the story of her battle against her stepdaughters. Today’s post focuses on another battle she fought—a conflict not about money. This struggle dealt with Senator Feinstein’s health and the impact of declining health on both the afflicted person and the caregivers.

The story is told through the eyes of Patti Davis, daughter of another politician. From her own experience watching the decline of her father President Ronald Reagan, Davis wrote “Floating in the Deep End: How Caregivers Can See Beyond Alzheimer’s.” Most recently, Davis provides an introspective recap in a guest essay for The New York Times. In it, she gives a heartfelt overview of the challenges faced by both the one suffering from dementia as well as the one providing care to a loved one with that dreaded disease.

Although Senator Feinstein’s diagnosis has not been revealed, Davis recognizes familiar signs: “the looks, the behavior . . . When Senator Feinstein returned from her lengthy time away, it was painfully illuminating to see her tell a reporter that she hadn’t been away at all, that she had been right there the whole time.” Davis understands the desire to preserve dignity and control over their lives. “They want to go to work, drive a car, live on their own.” Yet “for people losing their cognition, terror can be a constant companion. Confusion nips at their heels, and they reach desperately for the person they once were.” Davis describes how a trip to the Reagan Ranch, once her dad’s favorite place on Earth, made him agitated and frightened by the expansive green miles he once loved. Dementia narrows the boundaries of one’s world.

Beyond the impact of dementia on the patient, Davis also laments the impact on the caregiver. “It unleashes a torrent of emotions in caregivers. There is a fear of the unknown, . . . and there is a haunting awareness that everything you once relied on is falling apart.” Davis describes “caregiver stress” and “caregiver burnout” to the point that their own health can be put at risk.

Aside from the emotional issues, loved ones must also address legal and financial matters. Davis speculates on the challenges Senator Feinstein may have confronted in giving her daughter a power of attorney to act on her behalf. “For a son or daughter to assume autonomy over a parent’s life and say, ‘I’m making the decisions now,’ is a role reversal for which there’s no preparation.”

In my work as an estate planning lawyer, I often counsel families dealing with that role reversal. When a child approaches a parent to address dementia issues, it can be a difficult conversation. It helps to have an objective person on the team to help the family navigate these potentially turbulent waters. For example, a longtime client held a family meeting in my conference room so I could break the news to the patriarch that he could no longer drive. Having that message come from me made it easier for the patriarch to accept it. As dementia progressed, the caregiving process gradually led to a move to a memory care facility.

Whether or not Senator Feinstein’s “untold story” parallels President Reagan’s situation remains to be seen. However, when health challenges arise, caregivers need to know they are not alone. There are excellent resources to help. The Blum Firm would be honored to help provide families in need with appropriate estate planning solutions and caregiving support.

Rest in peace, Senator Feinstein.

Marvin E. Blum

President Reagan’s daughter Patti Davis observes similarities between Senator Feinstein’s health decline and her father’s, highlighting the challenges faced by both the afflicted person and the caregivers.

Senator Feinstein’s Other Battle, Through the Eyes of President Reagan’s Daughter Read More »

Inheritance in a Blended Family: Senator Feinstein vs. the Blum Girls

For 50% of today’s wedding couples, it’s not their first trip to the altar. Moreover, 65% of those remarriages involve children from a prior marriage. Even in the best of blended families, it sets the stage for potential conflicts. As an estate planning attorney, my advice is to get in front of it. Plan ahead and be specific, reducing the risk of later friction among family members.

One such high profile battle involves Senator Dianne Feinstein. A recent New York Times article describes it as a “bitter legal and financial conflict that pits her and her daughter, Katherine Feinstein, against the three daughters of her late [third] husband Richard Blum” (no relation to me). Though Feinstein and Blum were both rich in their own right, that still doesn’t prevent fights over money. Feinstein’s daughter has filed two lawsuits on her mother’s behalf against trustees of trusts established by Blum: (1) to force the sale of a beach house, being used by Blum’s daughters at Feinstein’s expense; and (2) to compel distributions from Blum’s life insurance proceeds to pay Feinstein’s significant medical expenses. Blum’s trustees dispute the lawsuits as “a stepdaughter engaging in some kind of misguided attempt to gain control over trust assets to which she is not entitled.” They attribute this feud to a “long-standing animosity” between Feinstein’s daughter and the daughter’s three stepsisters.

At issue is how to interpret language in a marital trust established by Blum for his wife of 40 years. At Feinstein’s death, the assets will pass to Blum’s three daughters. That creates a natural tension, as anything spent now will reduce what the Blum daughters inherit later. As Dustin Gardiner discusses in a recent Politico article, questions arise: Does Feinstein need to spend her own money before she can access money in the trust? Does Feinstein’s “medical care” include paying for a security guard and a caretaker? When the trust is silent on questions like these, the trustees are left trying to determine what Blum intended. The more explicit the trust language is, the better. Don’t make the trustees have to guess which sets the stage for an ugly blended family feud like this one.

Unfortunately, such family feuds in today’s modern family are not uncommon. The perils of inheritance are especially acute in a blended family. In addition to friction involving stepchildren and stepsiblings, the spouses themselves are at higher risk. Consider this sobering statistic: 60% of remarriages end in divorce. As an estate planner, I urge couples about to marry again to cover as many hard questions as possible in a prenup, and to be explicit in drafting trust provisions.

Many of the solutions involve life insurance. In a recent speech I gave on Life Insurance Planning Opportunities, I included a section called “Blended Families Require Extra Considerations” addressing five scenarios:

  1. Don’t Pit Stepchild Versus Stepparent
  2. My Spouse Would Never Cut Out My Kids (Right)?
  3. Equal or Equitable Between Sets of Children?
  4. Use of Life Insurance and Prenup Planning
  5. Quandary Over IRA Beneficiary

Click here to review that PowerPoint.

The Blum Firm is committed to helping families thrive from generation to generation. Our family legacy planning initiative is especially critical in helping non-nuclear families navigate the challenges. We would be honored to help your family protect its most precious assets—not just your financial capital but also your human capital.

Marvin E. Blum

Senator Dianne Feinstein’s public battle with her third husband’s daughters highlights the perils of inheritance in a blended family.

Inheritance in a Blended Family: Senator Feinstein vs. the Blum Girls Read More »

Out of the Mouths of Babes: Lessons from My Granddaughter Stella

Stella Savetsky is the first born of our five grandkids. Each is equally precious, but for several reasons our 10-year-old granddaughter Stella is truly a special soul. Laurie and I are grateful for having recently spent lots of quality time over the summer with Stella, during which time she taught us many important life lessons.

Let me roll the clock back to the significance of Stella’s birth. In the family tree that starts with my mother’s parents, Meyer and Pauline Oberstein, I fall in generation three (G-3), along with 17 others. Our daughter Lizzy is one of 62 descendants in G-4, a number that will surely grow much larger as the 12 G-3 kids of my uncle Rabbi Leonard Oberstein continue to have a lot more babies. G-5 will one day likely be filled with hundreds of cousins, but the fact will always remain that the very first member of G-5 was Stella.

To appreciate the significance of a G-5 with hundreds of Jewish cousins, you have to realize that it’s a miracle there’s a G-1 with Meyer and Pauline at all. They both barely escaped Hitler when they came to America in some of the final waves of Jewish immigration before World War II. Hitler’s plan was to wipe out the world’s Jews, and indeed he killed one-third of us, including some of our relatives who weren’t as fortunate as my grandparents. In the words of my son-in-law’s “Unkie” (a Holocaust survivor) upon seeing Stella, her birth proves that “We beat Hitler.”

Last week in New York, I attended a profound Sabbath class by Rabbi Shlomo Farhi of the Safra Synagogue. Amplifying the significance of Stella’s birth, Rabbi Farhi taught that, while marching to their death, Jewish Holocaust victims sang in Yiddish: “mir veln zey iberlebn,” which translates to “we will outlive them.” Nazis stole those marchers’ lives but not their spirit. Five generations later, Stella is living proof that indeed “we DID outlive them.”

As the leader of her generation, Stella bears a heavy responsibility. I’m proud to say she’s setting quite an example. Each week on Instagram she posts “Stella’s Torah Corner.” In that short video, Stella teaches that week’s Torah portion, in her own creative way with her own dramatic flair. She reaches thousands each week who would otherwise miss out on important Torah teachings. If you haven’t seen it, check out Lizzy Savetsky on Instagram and learn along with me from “Stella’s Torah Corner” every Friday. I had to substitute teach for her once, and let me tell you, it’s a lot harder than it looks!

Stella makes it a point to open her heart to everyone she meets. She once told me that at school she pays special attention to those who are alone, seeking out the kid who has no one with whom to talk. She is a very loving and devoted friend.

On the final day of her last visit to Fort Worth, she said to us “Let’s make it count.” I asked what she wanted to do, expecting some kid entertainment activity. Her answer: “I want to go see Bobbie,” the name we call my mother Elsie, her 92-year-old great grandmother. Visiting her great grandmother was Stella’s idea of making the day count.

Stella is growing up way too fast for us. She recently reminded us that her childhood is mostly in the rearview mirror when she no longer needed her lovey “Ray Ray,” from whom she used to be inseparable. Her words “I don’t need Ray Ray anymore” still sting in my heart and bring tears to my eyes.

In Jewish tradition, a girl takes on adult Jewish responsibilities at age 12 at her Bat Mitzvah. Boys do the same at age 13 at a Bar Mitzvah. Stella’s Bat Mitzvah is only about a year away. The date is already set—November 10, 2024. No doubt her Bat Mitzvah year will be filled with meaningful moments and lessons. Stay tuned. I’ll keep you posted.

Yes, Stella is growing up fast, but what a caring and beautiful young lady she’s becoming. Laurie and I are a very proud and grateful Mimi and Zaidy. We look forward to continuing to learn from Stella’s gigantic heart as we watch her future unfold. Little ones can teach us very big life lessons.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin and Laurie Blum’s granddaughter Stella teaches important life lessons through her words and actions, such as her weekly “Stella’s Torah Corner.” This episode received 56,500 views.

Out of the Mouths of Babes: Lessons from My Granddaughter Stella Read More »

Family Travel Opportunity? Say Yes!

Laurie and I were invited to a cousin’s wedding in Baltimore and debated whether to go. You know the narrative: we’re so busy; we’ve been doing so much traveling lately. It’s easy to talk yourself into saying no. Then a friend said, “You’d go if this were a funeral. The groom is the grandson of your uncle Rabbi Leonard Oberstein, your mother Elsie’s brother. Go and visit with your family. This is a no-brainer.” The practical voice in my head succumbed to the passionate voice in my heart. We went to the wedding, and I’m so glad we did.

The rewards of going began immediately upon entering the synagogue. Arriving early, I grabbed a visit with Uncle Leonard, an Orthodox Rabbi with 12 kids. I asked: “How many grandkids do you have now?” His answer: “I think it’s 52.” His wife Feigi confirmed the number, but no doubt that number will continue to grow as his kids keep having more kids. Great grandkids were also actively arriving. Every person in this growing multitude is my cousin.

As my dozens of cousins began arriving, I began catching up with them. There were so many meaningful updates, but I’ll share one that really grabs my heart. A first cousin, Eliezer, one of the world’s leading oncologists who is researching early detection of pancreatic cancer at NYU, has an eight-year-old daughter battling cancer in her neck. The family has been consumed with prayer and efforts to save her. Talking with another first cousin, Chaya, the mother of the groom, we learned of her own efforts to pray for her niece’s recovery. Only weeks before her son’s wedding, Chaya donated a kidney to a stranger, praying that G-d would hear her prayers and heal her niece. Soon thereafter, the family received word that the cancer is in remission. Here’s to medical wonders and the power of prayer!

There were so many more stories, including my visit with another first cousin now seven years sober after battling addiction. Every Saturday night he hosts a gathering in his home of men struggling with all forms of addiction, so they can provide each other with some group support.

The wedding was off-the-charts festive. This branch of my family is very religiously observant, preserving the traditions of my grandparents from Eastern Europe. Men and women were seated separately at both the ceremony and the dinner, followed by energetic circle dancing (men dancing with men and, on the other side of a high curtain, women dancing with women).

Upon leaving, my uncle invited us to his home the next morning for bagels and schmears, “immediate family only.” Laurie and I arrived to dozens and dozens of bagels and dozens and dozens of cousins. We spent three hours gathered around the kitchen table with revolving waves of bagel-eating relatives. I huddled with my uncle and learned family heritage stories I’d never heard before.

I knew that all my grandparents came to America before World War II, barely escaping Hitler. What I didn’t know is that Leonard found my grandmother Pauline’s passport and the story it revealed. Pauline’s passport claimed she was a citizen of Poland, even showing her name is Pola to sound more Polish. But Pauline lived in Ukraine; she never lived in Poland. When Ukraine wouldn’t allow them to leave, the family smuggled across the border into Poland and paid bribes to get Polish passports so they could come to America. Moreover, they got in under the wire as one of the last waves of immigration before the borders closed. It’s a miracle my family and I are alive. This heritage of miracles brings me so much perspective and gratitude.

I’ve previously written that author Mitzi Perdue says the number one most important contributor to family connection (and even successful business succession) is family travel. I’m a believer. With my loud internal practical voice, I almost missed out. Yet by going, I came away enriched by strengthened family ties and an expanded awareness of my heritage.

So now my daughter Lizzy is asking Laurie and me to join her family later this month on a trip to Israel to celebrate her son Ollie’s third birthday and first haircut (“upsherin”). The answer is an enthusiastic “yes!” Stay tuned. I’m sure I’ll have some lessons to share.

Marvin E. Blum

Left: Marvin and Laurie Blum with Rabbi Leonard Oberstein (Marvin’s uncle) at the wedding of one of Rabbi Leonard’s grandsons. Right: Rabbi Leonard and Feigi Oberstein with some of their 12 kids, 52 grandkids, and 6 great-grandkids (so far).

Family Travel Opportunity? Say Yes! Read More »

Estate Sale Leftovers Become Another Person’s Treasures

Last week’s post, “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff,” addressed the challenges of dividing personal effects among the heirs and concluded that in a Will, there’s no “small stuff.” Even mixing bowls and fishing poles can become precious family heirlooms. However, after all the precious items have been claimed by one heir or another, what becomes of the leftovers? Solution: An estate sale.

Don’t jump to the conclusion that estate sales are a bunch of junk. Indeed, stories abound how one man’s “junk” becomes another man’s “treasure.” Such are the revelations from Janelle Stone in “The Opulent World of the Estate-Sale Queen of Dallas” (Rachel Monroe, The New Yorker, Nov. 4, 2022). For Janelle Stone’s estate sales, people have been known to camp out for four days to be first in line. “Her sales typically last two days, during which she might sell more than a million dollars’ worth of antiques, vintage couture, and tchotchkes.”

Stone admonishes that there are no more “garage sales.” She describes her work as “treasure hunting.” In her second sale, she actually found a long-lost diamond in a sock. Stone even discovered an 18-karat pocket watch in the back of a drawer and $10,000 tucked between the pages of a book. “The most scandalous things that she has found are, alas off the record.” (That has my imagination in overdrive.)

Boston art dealer David Kantrowitz describes more “‘Antiques Roadshow’-type moments” where tchotchkes turned out to be treasures: “a $15,000 gold cuff bracelet that a son almost threw away, a $20,000 pair of midcentury armchairs from an attic home office, and a $25,000 silver-plated box on a hall shelf. One of his latest finds: A tchotchke on a kitchen counter in an apartment of a 98-year-old man turned out to be a sculpture appraised at $4,250.” His daughter didn’t even like it, and was happy to sell it and buy a pair of earrings, “something meaningful to her to remember her dad by. ‘They’ll be from him,’ she said.” Kantrowitz also found a diamond wedding ring and band in a hazardous-waste bag in the back of a closet. (Ashlea Ebeling, “Pass On Your Heirlooms, Not Family Drama,” Wall Street Journal, July 30, 2023).

I have my own estate sale stories. When I served as an executor of an estate, my law firm had a similar treasure hunt as we prepared for the estate sale. There was a massive book collection requiring us to turn through each page, as we regularly discovered money hidden between the pages. We even found a folded piece of paper that looked like a kid’s “fold, cut here, and paste” project from school. It turns out that “art project” was the real deal, a piece of “art” valued at $400,000!

A word of advice: Prepare a “Red File” revealing information your executor needs to know, such as valuable art objects and where you hide your buried treasure.

Proceeds from the estate sale pass to heirs under the residency clause of the Will. As for the final items that no one buys, donate the leftovers to charity. No doubt, someone will later discover yet more treasures at the local Goodwill or Salvation Army store.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s wife Laurie displays some estate sale treasures (antique chest, cloisonne horses, and china) acquired over the years by the Blum family.

Estate Sale Leftovers Become Another Person’s Treasures Read More »

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff? There’s No “Small Stuff” in a Will

Grandma’s mixing bowl. Grandpa’s fishing pole. We’ve all been told: “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” Isn’t this just “small stuff?” Wrong! According to Kansas attorney Tim O’Sullivan, when someone dies, the disposition of personal effects is the “second greatest risk to family harmony,” second only to choosing the right fiduciary. (“Why Family Harmony is a Frequent Casualty of Most Estate Plans,” The Journal of the Kansas Bar Association, Feb. 2020). Stories abound of heirs fighting mercilessly over how to divide nostalgic possessions like bowls and poles.

O’Sullivan’s article offers a treasure trove of advice about handling a decedent’s personal treasures. Here’s a “baker’s dozen” of the best tips:

  1. Create a “Personal Effects List” with detailed instructions. My mother-in-law had quite a collection of family heirlooms with sentimental value. We’re grateful she left a detailed list to allocate them among Laurie and her three sisters. Unfortunately, in spite of good intentions, most never get around to preparing such a list. When you do make the list, be sure to update it periodically.
  2. Send a copy of the list to your estate planning attorney and keep the original in a sealed envelope with your other original documents. Otherwise, such lists “sometimes have a habit of coincidentally ‘disappearing.’“ If more assurance is desired, the list can be formalized as a Codicil to a Will or as an Addendum to a Living Trust.
  3. Even better than a list (or in addition to it), consider making a video of such items for identification purposes and tell the provenance and family heritage of such items in the audio portion of the video.
  4. The executor should change the locks on the residence soon after death. If not, “a child may ‘jump the gun’ and employ ‘self-help’ by surreptitiously taking items from the parent’s residence.” O’Sullivan’s partner calls this the “pickup doctrine,” referring to the pickup truck that is commonly used in this “pick up” process.
  5. Avoid an overly broad definition of tangible personal items that pass outright to your loved ones, limiting the definition to items of personal usage or those with sentimental value. “Big ticket” items, especially those with little emotional attachment (such as “cars, airplanes, and boats, as well as valuable paintings, artworks and collections”), are usually best distributed under the residuary clause.
  6. Ask each child for a list of items they want, in order of preference, with the understanding that honoring such requests is not assured. Parents can take such preferences into account in preparing their Personal Effects List.
  7. Create a distribution procedure for items not on the list. First, give the children 90 days to reach a division by agreement among themselves. Failing such agreement, or for the leftovers, consider one of the following procedures.
  8. For undistributed items, one option is the “random sequential lottery method, with the sequence being reversed in each subsequent round having the same participants.” One by one, each participant selects one item. Make sure a minor child is represented by a trustee or guardian. If the parent desires financial equality, have an estate salesperson put a value on all such items, and any overall differential among the children in the value each received can be adjusted out of the children’s shares of the residuary estate.
  9. Another option is distribution by auction, either public or (more likely) private. Consider giving each child an equal amount of “virtual money” to use in bidding on items. Bidding can either be an open process or done by sealed bids.
  10. Appoint an independent fiduciary to make the division. Although “probably the most protective of family harmony, …independent financial fiduciaries would not be expected to welcome being burdened with this degree of discretion.” I describe this method as appointing a “King Solomon” to divide the personal effect “babies.”
  11. Second marriages create especially delicate situations for children and a stepparent dividing the personal assets. If dad leaves his estate to his kids, the surviving stepmom may have a homestead right to reside in an empty house if the furniture in it went to his kids.
  12. Clarify in the Will if the estate is expected to bear the cost of packing and shipping such items to the child. If silent, the child should be required to pick up the items within, say, 45 days or else either (i) the child would bear the cost of packing and shipping or (ii) the fiduciary can sell the items and distribute the proceeds to the child.
  13. Authorize the executor to electronically duplicate family pictures, videos, letters, and personal records and disseminate among all heirs who want them, with costs borne by the estate.

There are no perfect solutions, but following O’Sullivan’s tips improves the odds of avoiding sibling warfare over that mixing bowl or fishing pole.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s wife Laurie with her grandmother’s silver tea service. Laurie’s mother left explicit instructions for the disposition of her personal effects among her four daughters. Let’s follow her example.

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff? There’s No “Small Stuff” in a Will Read More »

Take a Walk – Alone, No Phone

On a recent Austin weekend to babysit our grandkids Lucy and Grey, I took a walk along Lady Bird Lake while they were napping. Remarkably, a simple thing like an afternoon walk, alone with no phone, opened my mind to powerful revelations. I highly recommend it.

Our lives are busy and hectic. We rarely take a moment to be in the moment, to just “be” and not “do.” My afternoon stroll calmed my ever-racing mind.

During the pandemic, I heard a virtual presentation “Mind in Motion” by psychologist, Leigh Weinraub that resonated with me. She said, “The mind is a hurricane, always racing forward and backward.” It requires intention to stop the racing and be in the moment. Being present in the “now” is comforting. We are free from worrying about the future “might be’s” and free from regret over past “might have been’s.” On my walk, I found that peace of being totally in the present. My mind slowed down.

Author Ryan Holiday echoes this theme in his book, Stillness Is The Key. Coincidentally, he recommends taking a walk, without a phone and without music, to find the stillness. Per Holiday, epiphanies only come when you are quiet. The most meaningful thoughts come to us when we’re in silence. Songwriters Hank Williams and Vince Gill both expressed how their creative juices ignited in stillness; they could just sit down and let the pen flow.

Holiday also advocates how a deep appreciation for nature’s beauty nourishes us: “Drink it in, and achieve stillness for the soul.” Walking along Lady Bird Lake, I found that nourishment. I noticed the purple wildflowers and thought of Alice Walker’s line, in The Color Purple: “I think it pisses G-d off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don’t notice it.” I noticed.

What else did I notice? I noticed the calm that came over me, accompanied by abundant gratitude. Looking at the Austin skyline, I reflected on all the good in my life associated with that city. Austin is where:

  • I met my wife Laurie, the love of my life.
  • I forged a lifelong best friendship with Talmage Boston.
  • I connected with wonderful friends who still are a part of my daily life.
  • I received a superior education in law and accounting.
  • With that education, I embarked on a dream career as an estate planning attorney.
  • My son Adam and his family live a beautiful life in Austin.
  • Laurie and I have the privilege of enjoying two precious grandchildren here – Lucy (4) and Grey (2).
  • The Blum Firm opened an office in Austin that is vibrant and thriving, thanks to a stellar team running it and the terrific support of the Austin community.

I am filled with gratitude for the blessings that came to my mind in the stillness of my walk. One final expression of gratitude came to my mind: my thanks to Lady Bird Johnson for her commitment to beautifying America, in whose memory Town Lake was renamed Lady Bird Lake. Her spirit lives in every wildflower that blooms along that trail. Lady Bird’s legacy is forever a gift to us. May we all search for a way to leave behind a legacy that will be a gift to future generations.

Marvin E. Blum

Left: Marvin and Laurie Blum are grateful for all that Austin offers, especially the privilege of babysitting grandkids, Lucy, Grey (and Basil!). Right: A walk along Lady Bird Lake provides Marvin with the stillness to soak up all the blessings that Austin represents to him.

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Rock Star Fiascos: Lessons from Elvis Presley, Prince, & Michael Jackson

Celebrities captivate us. Some are good role models who live exemplary lives and inspire us to emulate them. But unfortunately, big fame often leads to self-destructive behavior. The self-destruction of rock stars is nothing new. In fact, it was the subject of my daughter Lizzy’s thesis at New York University titled “Archetypes and Antecedents of the Rock Star.” Lizzy studied cases of famous lives who imploded over the centuries, and she drew parallels about fame contributing to their downfalls. The estate planning world is replete with rock stars whose messy lives carried on after their deaths, leaving behind messy estates. Let’s turn their sad stories into teachable moments.

I recently posted about the Queen of Soul Aretha Franklin’s estate planning disaster. After five years of battling by her four sons, a Michigan court declared Aretha Franklin’s notebook scribbles (found months after her death, buried under couch cushions) to be her Will. In leaving behind a mega-sized mess, Franklin is in the company of many of her entertainment colleagues. Let’s learn lessons from the estate fiascos of three other rock stars: Elvis Presley, Prince, and Michael Jackson.

I’ll begin with “The King,” Elvis Presley, truly a gift that keeps on giving us estate planning lessons. At his death in 1977, Elvis left an estate of roughly $5 million. “His spending had drained his earnings, which had long been limited by his business arrangement with this longtime manager Col. Tom Parker.” In desperation, Elvis had even sold future royalty rights from his recordings to RCA for $5.4 million, half of which went to Colonel Parker. Elvis’s estate went into a trust for daughter Lisa Marie, with her mother Priscilla Presley as a trustee. Lisa Marie began what “her lawyers have called her ‘11-year odyssey to financial ruin.’” Co-trustee Barry Siegel explains that “‘Lisa’s continuous, excessive spending and reliance on credit’ drove it into significant debt.” Consequently, the family today owns only 15% of Elvis Presley Enterprises, which operates Graceland (Elvis’s Memphis home).

Lisa Marie died on January 12, 2023, at age 54, estranged from her mother. Following her daughter’s death, Priscilla discovered that in a 2016 document Lisa Marie removed Priscilla (as well as Siegel) as co-trustees, replacing them with Lisa Marie’s daughter Riley Keough (age 33), son Benjamin Keough (who died by suicide in 2020 at age 27), and twin girls Finley and Harper Lockwood (age 14). Priscilla filed a petition challenging the 2016 amendment, as she failed to receive notice while Lisa Marie was alive (as required by the trust), her name is misspelled, it was neither witnessed nor notarized, and she questions the authenticity of Lisa Marie’s signature. Just recently, Priscilla and her granddaughter Riley have reached a settlement whereby Riley will serve as sole trustee and Priscilla will be a “special adviser” to the trust for an undisclosed annual amount. Although the Elvis brand takes in more than $100 million a year, the Presley family receives only 15%. It’s a shame that Elvis’s music legacy continues to be marred by financial disasters, even decades after his death. Lesson: it’s critical to select the right trustee. Imagine if Elvis had named a professional trustee with the skills to manage this situation prudently.

Let’s turn now to another “King,” the “King of Pop.” Michael Jackson’s popularity has soared since his death in 2009 from a fatal overdose of propofol and lorazepam. Based on his rising post-mortem fame, the IRS challenged his estate’s claim that at the time of his death, Jackson’s name and likeness was worth only $2,105. The IRS asserted the publicity rights associated with Jackson’s image were worth $434 million. On this issue, the Tax Court largely sided with the estate, valuing that asset at only $4.15 million. The court held that post-death success was irrelevant, as the value depended on Jackson’s reputation at the time of his death, when he was at a career low. The estate asserted “that his image had been rendered all but worthless by stories about skin bleaching, his obsession with plastic surgery, prescription drug abuse, odd parenting choices—such as covering his children’s faces in black veils or Spider-Man masks in public—and allegations that he molested young boys who visited [his home] Neverland.” Furthermore, he owed $500 million, was on the verge of bankruptcy, hadn’t filed personal income taxes in three years, and more than 60 creditors surfaced claiming he owed them money.

The Michael Jackson IRS tax case hung over the heads of his children until it was finally resolved in 2021, some 12 years after death. In a 271-page opinion, Tax Court Judge Mark Holmes grappled with the issues. “At the peak of his career, Jackson was one of the most famous people on Earth, with some of the most popular records ever released. And since his death, he has been one of the world’s top earning celebrities…. But the tax case turned on the value of Jackson’s public image at the time of his death. His reputation had been badly damaged, and since 1993, Judge Holmes noted, Jackson had no endorsements or merchandise deals unrelated to a musical tour or album.”

Although Jackson’s estate prevailed on the value of his image rights, other famous people should take note. In doing their estate plans, celebrities need to pay attention to Jackson’s “name-and-likeness fight” and recognize that his case “has tax-planning consequences for any actor, musician, politician, or athlete famous enough to earn beyond the grave.” Such is the “toughest issue” in the estate of Prince. “Estate-tax attorneys for Prince…must attempt to put a precise financial value on his name, image, and likeness…. The estate-tax challenge is setting a cumulative value on Prince’s profit potential on the day he died.” Indeed, Prince’s estate went to war with the IRS, as the government asserted that his estate was worth double what the estate’s administrator reported ($163.2 million vs. $82.3 million). They finally settled on a $156 million valuation.

Prince died in 2016 from a fentanyl overdose, setting up not just the IRS war, but also a six-year battle over who would inherit his estate. Why? Because, remarkably, Prince died without a Will. More than 45 people reportedly came forward as potential heirs to the estate, with many claiming to be a wife, child, sibling, half-sibling, or other relative. Suffice it to say it’s been a circus at the courthouse.

In stereotypical fashion, Prince lived a turbulent life. “Like his character in Purple Rain, ‘The Kid,’ Prince clashed with his father.” A young Prince even had to move out of his family home and live with a friend, to get away from his father. “Prince’s relationship with his family was never simple. His parents had children from several marriages, and over the years these eight brothers and sisters fell in and out of favor with their famous family member.” By leaving no Will, it’s highly unlikely Prince’s wealth passed into the hands he intended.

The obvious lesson from Prince’s death is to create a Will. In her Washington Post article “Don’t Do Your People Like Prince Did. Leave a Will,” Michelle Singletary puts it bluntly: “If you don’t have a will, you are being selfish and irresponsible. I know. I’m being harsh. And I mean to be.” She continues: “But get over your misgivings and stop procrastinating. This isn’t just about you…. Prince opens [“Purple Rain”] by saying, ‘I never meant to cause you any sorrow. I never meant to cause you any pain.’ Well, what do you expect will happen when you die not having taken care of your business? Your love song to your family should be your own will.”

Singletary says it so well and persuasively, I won’t even try to improve on her words. Let’s learn from the mistakes of these rock stars and get our estate plans in order.

Marvin E. Blum

Sources:

  • Matt Stevens, As a Film Revives Elvis’s Legacy, the Presleys Fight Over His Estate, N.Y. TIMES, Mar. 9, 2023.
  • Devin Leonard, Michael Jackson Is Worth More Than Ever, and the IRS Wants Its Cut, BLOOMBERG, Feb. 1, 2017.
  • Ben Sisario, Michael Jackson’s Estate Is Winner in Tax Judge’s Ruling, N.Y. TIMES, May 3, 2021.
  • Richard Rubin, What Is Prince’s Legacy Worth? The Tax Man Wants to Know, WALL STREET JOURNAL, Apr. 27, 2016.
  • Keith Harris, Prince’s Heirs Apparent: A Look at the Siblings Who Stand to Inherit His Fortune, BILLBOARD, May 11, 2016.
  • Michelle Singletary, Don’t Do Your People Like Prince Did. Leave a Will, WASHINGTON POST, May 3, 2016.
  • Matt Stevens, Riley Keough to Pay Priscilla Presley to End Family Trust Dispute, N.Y. TIMES, Jun. 13, 2023.
  • Chloe Melas and Alli Rosenbloom, Lisa Marie Presley Leaves Behind a Music Fortune and a Family Dispute, CNN, Feb. 3, 2023.
  • Anousha Sakoui, Priscilla Presley Agrees to Settlement in Dispute Over Lisa Marie Presley Estate, L.A. TIMES, May 16, 2023.
  • Ben Sisario, I.R.S. Says Prince’s Estate Worth Twice What Administrators Reported, N.Y. TIMES, Jan. 4, 2021.
  • Adrian Horton, Prince Family and Advisors Settle Distribution of Singer’s $156M Estate, THE GUARDIAN, Aug. 2, 2022.
  • Daniel Kreps, Prince Estate: Sister, Five Half-Siblings Named Heirs, ROLLING STONE, May 20, 2017.

Elvis Presley, Prince, and Michael Jackson lived messy lives and left behind messy estates. Let’s learn from their fiascos.

Rock Star Fiascos: Lessons from Elvis Presley, Prince, & Michael Jackson Read More »

Retire? Not me!

Today is my 69th birthday. Growing up, I thought I would have retired by now. Everyone was supposed to retire at 65, right? It seems that almost every day someone asks me when I plan to retire. But as I celebrate this birthday today, I have no intention of retiring, ever!

Of course, I’m realistic. When the day comes that my mind or body gives out, I’ll hang it up. I have empowered my partners John Hunter and Amanda Holliday to make that call if I’m unaware. So far, so good. I’m hoping the gene pool I’ve inherited from my mom allows me to mimic her. Thankfully, my mom, Elsie, is 92 and still 100% sharp and going strong!

Since I know I won’t be here forever, I’m making sure my business has a succession plan in place, unlike Logan Roy of HBO’s “Succession” series that I’ve written about. Speaking of “Succession,” WealthManagmement.com ran a follow-up article I wrote about the succession planning failures in the show where I proposed the Mara family, owners of the New York Giants, as basis for the next succession drama. The family and the football franchise have certainly had plenty of sensational headline-worthy happenings to use as inspiration. To read the article, click here.

The U.S. retirement age was set at 65 in 1935. Of course, lifestyles and longevity in 2023 are a world away from 1935. My best friend, Talmage Boston, makes this point in his article, “Baby Boomers are Delaying Retirement, and it’s Not Just Because of Finances” (Dallas Morning News, Nov. 8, 2020). Talmage’s thesis is that “60 is the new 40.”

Furthermore, those fortunate enough to be engaged in a fulfilling career aren’t inclined to walk away while still healthy. Talmage cites examples: cellist Yo Yo Ma, Saturday Night Live producer Lorne Michaels, investment guru David Rubenstein, infectious disease specialist Dr. Anthony Fauci, media mogul Oprah Winfrey, and Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg (who worked until her death at age 87).

Per Talmage, “deciding when to retire is an issue still on the table, though clarity about it has recently kicked in, thanks to my law school best friend Marvin Blum. Marvin has been one of the leading estate planning lawyers in the country for decades and has a thriving firm. He continues to love his work and enjoys warm-hearted fellowship with his colleagues at the office. Here’s his explanation for why retirement is not on his radar. ‘Staying present and engaged with my estate planning practice and law firm brings me energy and peace at the same time.’” I’m grateful to be able to keep doing what I love. Thanks, Talmage, for including me in such esteemed company and telling my story so generously.

The Wall Street Journal echoes this theme in “When Will I Retire? How About Never” (by Demetria Gallegos, April 20, 2023). Gallegos tells the stories of 16 people who have no intention of retiring, still finding meaning in their careers. I’ll add one more to the list: Stanley Johanson, my UT Law professor and mentor and the man responsible for my own fulfilling career.

It was 45 years ago that I had a “eureka” moment in Johanson’s class and discovered my destiny as an estate planning lawyer. Johanson, about to start his 61st year as a UT Law professor, is still as sharp and charismatic as ever. Like me, the word “retirement” isn’t in his vocabulary. Professor, thanks for turning me onto estate planning and thanks too for the inspiration to follow in your footsteps and wake up every day energized with a purpose.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum (front row, left of center) is following the example of his mentor, Professor Stanley Johanson, pictured at the celebration of Johanson’s 50th year on the University of Texas Law faculty. Ten years later, Johanson is still going strong and shows no intention of retiring.

Retire? Not me! Read More »

Getting Real—My Daughter’s Sobriety Journey

One week from today is my 69th birthday. But today, August 1, 2023, marks another special family “birthday.” I’m proud to announce that today marks my daughter Lizzy Savetsky’s two-year sobriety birthday, 24 months since her last drop of alcohol. It may shock some for me to express this so openly, but I do so with my daughter’s blessing and encouragement. Lizzy publicly shares her sobriety journey in hopes of reaching and helping someone who also struggles with this disease.

For those who don’t know Lizzy, I urge you to check out her story on Instagram (@lizzysavetsky). Lizzy is an open book. She dedicates her life to speaking out on important causes, especially all things Jewish and all things Israel. She is known internationally as social media’s leading voice to fight antisemitism.

Lizzy even turned her own difficulties with infertility and pregnancy into a movement to destigmatize pregnancy loss. Fueled by her three miscarriages, Lizzy founded Real Love, Real Loss and raised funds to dedicate a Torah to Israel’s front-line soldiers in memory of all the lost souls that mothers carried but never got to meet.

While pursuing her activism, Lizzy became aware that alcohol was not her friend. Lizzy found the inner strength and courage to take up the fight against her demons. In typical Lizzy fashion, she uses her story to spread awareness. Hitting the speaking circuit, Lizzy’s openness is giving hope and saving lives.

In my estate planning work, I am aware that many families are dealing with addiction. I shared previously of a wake-up call I had while attending an annual conference for Family Office Exchange (“FOX”). In the day-long seminar on tax planning, estate planning, investing, and money management, the family office topic that attracted the most interest was addiction. Almost every family attending the conference was dealing with the problem of substance abuse at some level.

I was astounded by the revelation, and it contributed to me shifting my estate planning practice from “head” to “head and heart” planning. Families are hurting. Estate planners have a unique seat at the table to help. The estate planning process is more than a Will. My mission is to expand estate planning into legacy planning and use our tools to help strengthen families.

I join my daughter in being a champion to help families face issues and resist sweeping them under the rug. Lizzy’s courage helps me be a better lawyer. As a grateful dad, I salute you, Lizzy, for living a purposeful life. Your mom and I couldn’t be more proud.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum salutes his daughter Lizzy Savetsky, today two years into her courageous sobriety journey.

Getting Real—My Daughter’s Sobriety Journey Read More »

What I Learned from the Deaths of My Father and Brother

What positives could possibly come from losing both my father and my brother to pancreatic cancer? A recent column by acclaimed author Arthur Brooks poses an intriguing oxymoron: thinking about your death can actually increase your happiness. Per Brooks, “contemplating your mortality might sound morbid, but it’s actually a key to happiness.” How is that possible?

Brooks says, “Death is hard to think about. We tend to avoid the subject…But when we focus on death, that increases the stakes at play in the present, and clarifies what we should do with our time.” Realizing our days are limited makes us realize how precious they are. It helps us focus on filling our time with joy and meaning. Brooks promotes prioritizing “love and relationships.” He asks, “Are you neglecting your family life today? Your friendships? Your spiritual development?”

Brooks begins his column with the inspiring story of Randy Pausch, the Carnegie Mellon professor who taught his last class on September 18, 2007. In that last lecture, Professor Pausch announced his diagnosis with terminal pancreatic cancer. Although he would soon leave behind a wife and three young kids, his message was “a celebration of life and love…” Pausch was putting on a masterclass in happiness by leaning into the reality of his own death.”

Here’s another story of a 43-year-old who is turning his terminal cancer diagnosis into something positive. In his final weeks, Nick Hungerford, co-founder of Nutmeg which sold for $700 million, is creating the charity Elizabeth’s Smile (named for his young daughter) to support children who lose a parent to terminal illness. He described it as a “‘great privilege’ to ‘feel the love’ of his family and friends despite facing death.”

This gets very personal for me, given that my father and my brother Irwin also died too young from pancreatic cancer. As a parting gift to me, Irwin held onto life long enough to provide blood for genetic testing, dying only moments later. Thankfully, comparing my blood to Irwin’s revealed no known gene predisposing me to cancer. Nevertheless, losing two first-degree relatives to pancreatic cancer still puts me in the “high risk” category. I enrolled in an early detection program at UT Southwestern, and so far my seven annual MRIs have come out clean. As I approach my 69th birthday in two weeks, I don’t take my health or my life for granted. As Brooks teaches, I’m filled with gratitude, and my top priorities are spending time with loved ones and creating memorable moments.

At this year’s Berkshire Hathaway Annual Shareholders Meeting, I asked Warren Buffett to share estate planning advice, and his answer shows he and Arthur Brooks are aligned. Buffett suggests writing your own obituary now and “reverse engineering” to live life in a way that will make that obituary come true. As an assignment from my TIGER 21 group, I actually wrote my obituary. Like Buffett, I recommend it. It’ll set your priorities straight.

In writing my obituary, I was guided by another author by the name of Brooks—David Brooks—and his book The Road to Character. David Brooks helped me distinguish between “Resume Marvin” and “Eulogy Marvin.” The focus of my obituary is not on my resume lines, rather on what really matters in living a meaningful life. On their deathbed, people don’t say they wished they’d worked harder or had more things. According to Arthur Brooks, what they care about is “activities that yield meaning, such as practicing religion, appreciating beauty, or spending more time with loved ones.” I’ve also actually been told by clients on their deathbed that having their estate plan in order provided them peace of mind, the feeling of a parting gift to their family.

Being aware that each of us will one day be gone doesn’t have to be morbid. Let’s use that awareness to make the most of each day, get our affairs in order, and work on creating a lasting legacy. As Arthur Brooks concludes: “Look at the sapling you plant today, and imagine your great-granddaughter sitting under the mature tree.” Let’s go plant a tree that will one day yield fruit and shade for our loved ones, known in Hebrew as an “etz chaim”—a tree of life.

Marvin E. Blum

This old Blum family portrait shows Julius, Elsie, Irwin, and a very young Marvin Blum. Daddy and Irwin both died way too young from pancreatic cancer. Now it’s just Mama and me.

What I Learned from the Deaths of My Father and Brother Read More »

Does This Look Like a Will to You? A Jury Says It’s Aretha’s

It’s alarming how many people die without a Will. I’m particularly shocked how many people of high net worth put off estate planning. By failing to plan, they leave behind a mess for their family. Such is the case with the “Queen of Soul.” Aretha Franklin’s four sons have been battling over her estate since her death five years ago.

At issue is whether any of these were Franklin’s Will:
#1 – 2010 handwritten papers (signed on each page and notarized) found in a locked cabinet.
#2 – 2014 handwritten pages found in a spiral notebook under couch cushions, with multiple scrawlings, crossed-out words, and insertions.
#3 – A draft of a Will she was preparing with her estate lawyer, to which she referred in three voicemail messages months before she died.

If none qualifies as a legitimate Will, Michigan law would divide the estate equally among Franklin’s four sons.

The case went to trial last week. Jury verdict: the document behind “Door Number Two” wins—the 2014 scribbles which her niece discovered under the couch cushions (many months after Franklin’s death) is the official Will.

Now the work begins to decipher and interpret it. To get an idea of the task at hand, look at this excerpt:

The jury concluded that the smiley face paired with “Franklin” represents her signature. “The process of interpreting a deceased person’s intentions from the lines of a handwritten document can be a confusing, contentious process, one that made for a gripping story line in the HBO series ‘Succession.’ In the show’s final season, the family patriarch’s heirs struggled to decode penciled-in addendums to [patriarch Roy Logan’s] last wishes that were found locked in a safe.”1

The 2014 Will changes the outcome from what Michigan law would dictate if no Will were deemed legitimate. The 2014 Will excludes eldest son Clarence Franklin, suffering from a mental illness and under a legal guardianship (though a recent settlement provides him an undisclosed percentage of the estate.) Youngest son Kecalf Franklin is the big winner, receiving more of his mother’s personal assets, including two of her four houses and her cars. Furthermore, the 2014 document omitted a requirement from the 2010 version requiring that sons Kecalf and Edward “‘must take business classes and get a certificate or a degree’ to benefit from the estate.”2

Franklin’s third son Ted White II asserted that the 2010 document signed on each page, notarized, and kept under lock and key should take precedence over papers found in a couch. The jury disagreed. Unsurprisingly, Ted and Kecalf did not appear to speak to each other at the trial.

Consider the pain and disharmony that could have been avoided if only mom Aretha had left a clear expression of her wishes. Out of “R–E–S–P–E–C–T” for your heirs, please do thoughtful, legally-documented estate planning as a gift to your family.

Marvin E. Blum

1 Julia Jacobs, Is Aretha Franklin’s True Will the One Found in the Couch or a Cabinet?, N.Y. TIMES, Jul. 9, 2023.
2 Ed White, Jury Decides 2014 Document Found in Aretha Franklin’s Couch is a Valid Will, ASSOCIATED PRESS, Jul. 11, 2023.

Out of “R–E–S–P–E–C–T” for your family, learn from Aretha Franklin’s mistake and create a clear, legally-documented estate plan.

Does This Look Like a Will to You? A Jury Says It’s Aretha’s Read More »

“I’m Leaving Nothing to My Kids” – Really?

In last week’s post, I conveyed my concerns about the upcoming $84 trillion transfer falling into unprepared hands. This topic was a particular focus of the legacy planning workshops Tom Rogerson and I recently presented in Detroit and Houston.

In those workshops I reported that many parents respond to the concern of wealth ruining their kids by saying they won’t leave anything to their kids. A recent example is a power couple from the entertainment world, Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis. Kutcher’s Twitter post that they don’t plan to leave any money to their children ignited a “nepo baby” stir. The debate is that nepo babies born to famous parents benefit from nepotism and get an unfair advantage, risking entitled behavior.

Accordingly, Kutcher “said he and Kunis plan to give their reported combined net worth of about $275 million away to charity rather than their children.” They “don’t want their children to become spoiled and entitled, and want them to be motivated to work hard.” (“Aston Kutcher and Mila Kunis’s plan to leave no money to their children is causing a stir on social media amid the ‘nepo baby’ debate,” available here).

Discussing the concept of disinheriting kids with the workshop attendees, here’s what I reported. I hear this statement from parents often. Though many parents profess that they’ll leave little or nothing to their kids, the reality is that when I read their Wills, it still leaves the bulk of their wealth to the kids. It appears easy for parents to say they’re leaving their kids nothing, but hard to actually pull the trigger. A case in point is Anderson Cooper saying over the years that his mother Gloria Vanderbilt was going to leave him nothing, yet Gloria’s Will said otherwise when she died. Even Warren Buffett admits he’s leaving his children a larger inheritance than he originally claimed.

Given that most parents indeed leave their wealth to their children, the focus needs to be how to prepare heirs for the inheritance coming their way. Leaving money to kids doesn’t have to disincentivize them and steal their drive, if you follow certain steps. Charlie Carr recommends these steps in “How to Avoid Entitlement” (available here).

  1. Help your kids develop a work ethic. Make them work, starting in their childhood, whether in the family business or doing the lawn.
  2. In order for the next generation to gain such a work ethic, they must first see it modeled in the older generations. Take them to work with you to see you have a real job and really work hard.
  3. Make your kids earn their way in the business, working their way up into senior positions.

The other aspect of battling entitlement is to pass down strong family values. I recently attended a Northern Trust Wealth Planning Symposium where Barbara Bush (granddaughter of Pres. George H. W. Bush and Barbara Bush) illustrated how the Bush family instilled values in their heirs. Although famous and powerful, the Bush grandparents modeled humility and service, as well as love of family and gratitude. In restaurants, granddaughter Barbara noticed that George and Barbara would stop and interact with each person on the waitstaff. She shared a powerful story that as children, twins Barbara and Jenna (daughters of Pres. George W. Bush and Laura Bush) were bowling in the White House bowling alley and called the kitchen to bring them two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Grandmother (and First Lady) Barbara Bush soon appeared and said furiously, “This is not a hotel; it’s a home!” She made them go straight to the kitchen to apologize. Children of privilege don’t have to grow up spoiled.

For those of us who haven’t consistently delivered the Barbara Bush message to our children, Adrienne Penta offers words of encouragement for “Raising Kids With Wealth” (available here). Penta says it is never too late. “The question is: How do you stop a pattern and change course? The first step is acknowledging that we are on the wrong path. The second step is communicating course correction: ‘As your parents, we don’t think we have set the right tone for how we think money should be used. Let’s rethink it, starting with what matters most to us as a family.’ The conversation starts with values, which can then serve as a north star for a family’s financial plan, including allowances for young children, estate planning, and philanthropy.”

For those of you out there like me who haven’t always delivered the right message to our kids and grandkids, Penta’s words bring comfort. It’s never too late.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum and Tom Rogerson at Houston workshop, guiding parents on estate planning to create empowered, not entitled, heirs.

“I’m Leaving Nothing to My Kids” – Really? Read More »

When It Comes to Your Family Legacy, Don’t Wish, Don’t Hope, Don’t Dream—PLAN!

Watching an Avis Car Rental television commercial, I heard these words that got my attention: “Don’t wish, Don’t hope, Don’t dream…PLAN!” Ironically, that message also applies perfectly to my initiative to work with families to plan a lasting legacy.

I recently teamed up with my colleague Tom Rogerson to present Family Legacy Planning workshops in Detroit and Houston. In researching and preparing to teach these workshops, I always become the student, learning even more in this vast landscape of helping families build a legacy.

My research focused on the massive wealth transfer that is coming. As members of two aging populations—the “Greatest Generation” and “Baby Boomers”—die over the next couple of decades, it’s projected that $84 trillion will pass down to the next generation. Statistics show that, by and large, this largesse is passing into unprepared hands.

For the first 35 years of my career, my primary focus was to help clients avoid paying the 40% estate tax. Indeed, the opportunities to do so are so effective that many dub the estate tax a “voluntary tax” paid only by those who volunteered to not plan around it. As I said in last week’s post, my poster child for this proposition has often been the Sam Walton family, founder of Walmart and Sam’s Club. If one of the world’s richest families can avoid estate tax, then so can a family of any size of wealth.

In all candor, The Blum Firm has become so good at helping families avoid estate tax that our planning has effectively almost doubled the sizes of inheritance. That’s a good thing as long as the inheritance is put to good use. But, I had some wake-up calls as all too often I witnessed inheritances tearing apart families. So, over the last decade, I have expanded my focus to helping strengthen families and prepare heirs for the inheritance coming their way, what I often call “head & heart” estate planning.

That focus was the driving force behind the Detroit and Houston workshops I taught with Tom Rogerson. I started by reflecting on how estate planning has evolved since I graduated from UT Law School 45 years ago. In illustrating that “It’s Not Your Daddy’s Estate Planning Anymore,” I stressed that estate planning is more than having a Will. Modern estate planning also includes:

  • Planning for incapacity
  • Protecting assets from creditors/divorce
  • Minimize tax (income tax and estate tax)
  • Business succession planning
  • Prenup planning
  • Special needs trusts
  • Charitable planning
  • Living Trust to preserve privacy and avoid probate
  • Ancillary documents (Powers of Attorney, Healthcare Proxy, Living Will, HIPAA Waiver, Declaration of Guardian, Beneficiary Designations)
  • Elder law
  • Red File

After describing how an Estate Plan has expanded, I built on that theme to illustrate how to “Supercharge Your Estate Plan into a Legacy Plan.” Just like an Estate Plan is more than a Will, a Legacy Plan is more than an Estate Plan. Legacy planning is a holistic process aimed at strengthening the family. Aspects of legacy planning include:

  • Identifying family values, purpose, and vision
  • Building the estate plan around the family purpose instead of around money
  • Creating trusts that mentor the beneficiaries to become empowered rather than entitled
  • Preparing heirs to be responsible inheritors
  • Engaging in family enrichment activities and education
  • Opening up communication channels and building trust
  • Establishing a family governance structure
  • Preserving family heritage and traditions
  • Onboarding in-laws and next generations
  • Creating a meaningful family legacy to pass from generation to generation

Legacy Planning recognizes that there’s more to family wealth than money.

Tom and I continued the workshop by offering practical solutions to help families build a Legacy Plan, sharing best practices from successful families. In upcoming posts, I’ll share some of those best practices, along with other highlights from our presentations.

I’ll close this post by sharing how gratifying it is to work with families and witness their success. With permission from a long-time valued client, I’ll share this message Jane sent me:

“Thanks to you, Marvin, for helping our family get off on the right track all those twenty plus years ago. I am so proud of our four children and how they are using their inheritance as well as their own resources to ‘do the most good’ in their own communities—with adult grandchildren following closely behind. My deceased husband would be blown away to know how many people, programs, and projects he has helped as we all used his resources to begin this journey. I especially realize how very fortunate we are to have benefitted from your counsel when I observe and hear the sad tales of others, who apparently received no preparation at all. Thank you for helping our family be a success story!”

Jane also shared that her family, now numbering 34 in size, conducts an annual family retreat each June with close to perfect attendance. Jane, this is music to my ears, and gives me the juice to propel me forward in this important work to help families succeed.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum with Tom and Cathy Rogerson of GenLeg Co., co-presenting workshops in Detroit and Houston on “Supercharging Your Estate Plan into a Legacy Plan.”

When It Comes to Your Family Legacy, Don’t Wish, Don’t Hope, Don’t Dream—PLAN! Read More »

Learn All About Marvin and Estate Planning in One Hour Podcast

I was recently asked to be interviewed for a one-hour podcast, and I said yes. I’m glad I did. The interviewer is David Spray, a Houston CPA and fellow Longhorn, President of Export Advisors. David created a “get to know Marvin” experience, starting with my eureka moment at UT that directed me into estate planning, my early “big law” days when I saw a gap I wanted to fill, and the creation of The Blum Firm to fill that gap. The podcast tells the story of my career journey from solo practice to now, diving deep into the current “Golden Age of Estate Planning” with tips on how to create a lasting legacy. If you want a snapshot of who I am and what’s hot in the world of estate planning, take a listen at https://www.IC-DISCShow.com/043 or watch the video here.

David’s thoughtful questions gave me an opportunity to share my unique approach to estate planning that gets to the head and the heart of the matter. We talk about the impact of politics and policy, lessons learned from Congress’s recent efforts to empty out much of our toolbox, and the current two-year window before Trump tax cuts vanish. We discuss the “Use it or Lose it” deadline when the $12,920,000 exemption sunsets in half, and how you can “have your cake and eat it too” with trusts that preserve access, control, and flexibility. We make lemonade out of the rising interest rates by revealing tools that actually work better in a higher interest rate environment. We talk about the “win-win-win” world of philanthropy that benefits society, keeps a family connected, and saves taxes, using real-life stories to show how. I’m amazed how much territory we manage to cover in an hour; it’s really a crash course in estate planning.

David also pulls out some personal reflections and stories I rarely share. I reveal some communication challenges that surfaced in our own home during the pandemic, and how Tom Rogerson of GenLeg Co. came to our family’s rescue. Admittedly, I’m a cobbler who discovered my own shoes needed some repair.

David surprised me with this question: “What advice would you give to your 25-year-old self?” I would have told that Marvin to fight the temptation to let my mind race forward and invent lots of “what if’s” to worry about. I had lots of sleepless nights over “what if’s” that never happened. Think of all that wasted energy. And as to the challenges that I never anticipated but actually happened, I worked through all of them just fine. Maybe this hits home with some of you?

The final question is a profound one: “Barbeque or Tex-Mex?” Listen to my shout-out to Joe T. Garcia’s Mexican restaurant where we celebrate many Blum family special times.

I closed the podcast with a thought that I’ll use to close this post: Ten years from now, I hope you’ll look back on 2023 and be proud of the estate planning you did to set your family up for success. The opportunity has never been better. Let’s seize it!

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum was honored to be interviewed on David Spray’s IC-DISC show, providing a heartfelt reveal about estate planning and his own career journey.

Learn All About Marvin and Estate Planning in One Hour Podcast Read More »

Make the Economic Downturn Work for You

When I spoke recently at a Business Owners Conference sponsored by Bank of America/Merrill Lynch, I learned that 50% of owners will sell their business over the next 10 years. Much of the conference was devoted to one primary goal: how to maximize the sales price. When it was my turn, I built on that with a corollary goal: how to minimize the tax bite. The two goals work together, as maximizing the sales price and minimizing tax both operate to leave more in the family’s pocket at the end of the day.

Minimizing tax is aimed at saving both income tax and estate tax. To reduce income tax: we explore Section 1202 Qualified Small Business Stock (QSBS), charitable remainder trusts (CRTs), installment sale techniques, transfers of business interests to charity prior to sale, investing proceeds in Qualified Opportunity Zone deals, and other tools. To reduce estate tax: we turn to “squeeze & freeze” planning. The “squeeze” comes from business entity structures that achieve valuation discounts. The “freeze” involves transferring discounted business interests to trusts, such as Defective Grantor Trusts (DGTs), Spousal Lifetime Access Trusts (SLATs), 678 Trusts, Grantor Retained Annuity Trusts (GRATs), and charitable trusts.

In my speech, I used the Walton family (founders of Walmart and Sam’s Club) as a poster child for avoiding estate tax. Because of the Walton family’s success, many dubbed the estate tax a “voluntary tax.” My thesis is that if the Waltons (one of the world’s richest families) can avoid estate tax, so can you. I followed up with examples of our own clients who erased millions of dollars of estate tax by “squeeze & freeze” planning. Moreover, several of the techniques allow you to: (1) retain control, (2) retain access, and (3) retain flexibility so you’re not locked into an estate disposition that you later wish to change.

In talking to business owners who own 100% of their company, I admonished that unless they engage in tax planning, they actually have a silent business partner who owns 40% or more of their company: the U.S. Government.

Other speakers lamented that we are in an economic downturn. It isn’t October 2021 anymore. With interest rates soaring, the market has cooled considerably. I turned that lament on its head with the counter-intuitive announcement that today’s economic downturn makes now the perfect time to do “squeeze & freeze” planning. The market cooling works to our advantage, as we can now transfer assets out of the estate at lower valuations. This works for not only a family business but indeed any package of investment assets. Instead of being distressed over market conditions, use this as an opportunity. Don’t wait until a recovery to engage in planning. Pre-recovery planning beats post-recovery planning. It is far more tax efficient to plan when values are lower.

Furthermore, there’s no guarantee the techniques we use will be available in the future. Congress came within two votes of shutting many of these tools down in 2021. Had Congress passed that law, those who had already planned would have been grandfathered. Act now and lock in the benefit of today’s tools.

In estate planning, time is not our friend. The earlier you plan, the better. I illustrated this point with the following timeline assuming a $10 million sale with a $1 million gift to charity:

The earlier on the timeline you plan, the bigger the valuation squeeze. Furthermore, making the charitable transfer before the sale, you report $9 million proceeds, less the charitable gift. If you make the gift after the sale, you report $10 million proceeds, less the charitable gift. If you do squeeze planning now, years from now you’ll give yourself a big pat on the back and be proud of the dollars you saved your family by planning early.

My mission is to help families who wish to pass down a business legacy to future generations beat the odds and achieve success. About 90% of U.S. businesses are family-owned, yet the survival of these businesses shrinks to 30% after Generation 2, 12% after Generation 3, and 3% after Generation 4.

For those families who opt to sell the business, I want to help them reach the finish line. The biggest obstacles are not financial, but psychological. It’s hard to part with your business “baby.” For that reason, I closed by urging all sellers of family businesses to focus not only on the transaction, but also on the owner’s transition. As I so often preach, there’s more at stake here than money.

To view a copy of my PowerPoint, “Planning in a Perfect Storm for Business Owners,” click here.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s recent speech at a Business Owners Conference (sponsored by Bank of America/Merrill Lynch) stressed why lower valuations make this the ideal time to do estate tax planning.

Make the Economic Downturn Work for You Read More »

I’m Fort Worth Proud!

I’ve always been one of Fort Worth’s biggest champions. Even going back to my youth when we were known mostly as a “sleepy town,” I was full of local pride. Legend has it that around 1875, a Dallas attorney claimed this place was so quiet that he saw a panther asleep on a downtown Fort Worth street. We embraced that sleepy image and even adopted the panther as a local mascot.

Perusing the Summer 2023 issue of Fort Worth, Inc. magazine which recognizes “The 400 Most Influential People in Fort Worth,” it’s evident that times have changed. I’m honored and humbled to be among this group of community leaders. Fort Worth is now a dynamic, thriving hub of activity. Texas Monthly acknowledges our “gaudy 4 percent increase in population since 2020, bringing the population to 956,709 (number 13 on the list [of the nation’s largest cities]). This makes Cowtown the fastest-growing big city in the country by a wide margin.”

Many may need to read that line again or feel the need to check the article for themselves. In fact, a recent survey asked a focus group to guess Fort Worth’s rank, and the response came in that they thought of us as 50th in size, rather than 13th.

Many long-time residents prefer staying under the radar. Like it or not, the secret is out. We’re still Cowtown but also so much more. A recent marketing campaign dubbed us “Cowboys & Culture,” spotlighting the happy marriage here of rodeo and the arts. I recently completed a 42-year stint as Treasurer of the Fort Worth Symphony, a world-class orchestra. On top of that, we have the Van Cliburn International Piano Competition and fabulous art museums. The list goes on and on.

Even with our growth, Fort Worth remains a warm and welcoming community where we are here for each other. As an estate planning lawyer dedicated to helping clients live a fulfilling life, I stress the importance of being part of a supportive community. Research shows that being connected to others not only improves the quality of life but even our health and longevity. For me, Fort Wort is such a community.

Though some still think we’re just a suburb in Dallas’ shadow, this town “where the West begins” has its own prominent identity. The next time you hear the country tune “Does Fort Worth Ever Cross Your Mind?,” the answer will likely be “Yes!”

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum is proud of his Fort Worth roots and honored to be among the 400 locals recognized by Fort Worth, Inc. magazine. Let’s celebrate all that Fort Worth has to offer!

I’m Fort Worth Proud! Read More »

Succession Planning Tips for Your Business and Your Family

Last week’s post addressed the challenge of transferring an enterprise’s leadership to a successor, whether that enterprise is a business, a royal family, or any family. I gave Queen Elizabeth high marks for doing a better job than Logan Roy of the HBO series “Succession.” I also praised Bernard Arnault (“the world’s richest person”) for his thoughtful process “to pass on the baton, dividing up key roles in the LVMH Moët Hennessy Louis Vuitton empire among his five children.” (Andrew Ross Sorkin, “Family Drama,” The New York Times DealBook Newsletter, May 27, 2023.)

Now that HBO has aired the final episode of “Succession,” author Sorkin predicts that the search is on for the next family succession drama. Many speculate that the fictional Logan Roy was modeled after Rupert Murdoch. Sorkin suggests the aforementioned Arnault dynasty as a likely candidate for the next TV succession drama. He pictures a season finale “inspired by the glitzy reopening of Tiffany after LVMH bought the brand in a turbulent acquisition.” (See last week’s post where I hailed Arnault’s succession process as a role model approach.)

Per Sorkin, other real-life family dramas that could provide the needed dirt for a succession feud include:

  • •The Sacklers: Owners of Purdue Pharma which produced the painkiller OxyContin, who fell from grace for their role in the opioid crisis, even having the Sackler name stripped from a wing of the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York.
  • The Maras: Owners of the New York Giants, whose split into two factions reached the point that a Venetian blind was installed to divide their stadium luxury suite.
  • The Safras: One of the world’s richest bankers, Joseph Safra cut out son Alberto from his Will, resulting in Alberto now suing his two brothers and his mother.
  • The Kushners: Real estate mogul Charles Kushner’s feud with his brother-in-law landed him in jail, while son Jared married Ivanka Trump and “then raised billions from the Saudis,” and son Joshua married a supermodel.

Speaking to the challenge of getting succession right, in his article “How to Do Succession Better Than Logan Roy,” Miles Nadal offers these tips to help the business leader pave the way:

  • Accept that a transition is inevitable.
  • There are no shortcuts; expect it to take at least three to five years.
  • Identify talent with a different skillset from the founder, as it’s different to maintain an empire than to create it.
  • Begin detaching and delegating.
  • Resist the temptation to intervene.
  • Let them fail; the learning process from solving problems is more valuable than being rescued and right.
  • Put more energy into strengthening the company culture than into teaching the nuts and bolts of running the business. (Remember, “culture eats strategy for breakfast” from my post of April 4th.

In closing, as an estate planner committed to not only helping businesses successfully transition but also helping families do the same, I submit that these same principles apply to every family. As family consultant Matt Wesley teaches, there comes a time when the patriarch and matriarch need to move from being quarterback to being coach.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum pays homage to Bernard Arnault, owner of Tiffany & Co. and other luxury brands, for Arnault’s thoughtful approach to succession planning.

Succession Planning Tips for Your Business and Your Family Read More »

Who Did “Succession” Better: Queen Elizabeth or Logan Roy?

Finding a successor to fill the business founder’s shoes is a challenge. In Texas, we often recommend choosing the heir apparent early and letting him “ride around in the truck” with the founder for several years. By the time the successor takes over the family “ranch,” he’s ready. Moreover, the rest of the stakeholders have been prepared to accept the successor in that key role.

The most compelling example of “riding around in the truck” is King Charles III. Then Prince Charles “rode around in the carriage” for more than 70 years, being groomed by Queen Elizabeth II for his role heading the monarchy.

Another family of business royalty also deserves praise for getting in front of the transition. It’s the family of Bernard Arnault, owner of Louis Vuitton, Christian Dior, Tiffany & Co., and other luxury brands. Arnault has been grooming his five kids since their early childhood. (“The World’s Richest Person Auditions His Five Children to Run LVMH, The Luxury Empire,” Nick Kostov and Stacy Meichtry, Wall Street Journal, Apr. 19, 2023.)

Arnault drilled the kids in math from early on, even himself studying a math textbook on a flight to Paris after a grueling trip to Asia. “I need to refresh my memory,” said Mr. Arnault to one of his top lieutenants.

The children were encouraged to attend top schools and study engineering. The goal was to develop a rational mindset allowing them to analyze a situation or problem very quickly. Arnault also pairs each of his children with executives who mentor them and keep an eye on their performance. The five kids watch Arnault in action, accompanying him on business trips and negotiations. Now that’s riding around in the truck (or jet)!

Arnault (age 74) is still in the driver’s seat in the truck. LVMH recently raised the retirement age for its chairman and CEO to 80. When the time comes to hand over the wheel, he will choose based on merit. The kids are expected to fall in line. They’ve been taught from a young age to work through disagreements and put the interests of the company first.

Here’s the status of Arnault’s five, each filing a key role:

  • Oldest child (and only daughter) Delphine (48) is CEO of Christian Dior.
  • Antoine (45) is CEO of the company that holds the family’s stake in LVMH.
  • Alexandre (30) is Executive Vice President of Tiffany & Co.
  • Frederic (28) runs Tag Heuer watch brand.
  • Jean (24) is Director of Marketing & Development at Louis Vuitton’s watches division.

Unfortunately, in the world of business succession, Arnault is an outlier. Most media accounts reveal stories of families in disarray after the founder dies, with no one designated or prepared to succeed. The HBO hit series “Succession” is a fictional case-in-point, which just aired its last episode on Sunday. Each week, millions tuned in “to watch the entire Roy family scheme, plot, and backstab their way to replacing the company’s patriarchal founder,” Logan Roy. (“How to Do Succession Better Than Logan Roy,” Miles S. Nadal, Quartz, Mar. 6, 2023.)

Author Nadal draws parallels to Shakespeare’s King Lear, Macbeth, Coriolanus, and Hamlet, other fictional examples of “the brutal realities of succession.” Perhaps Queen Elizabeth II learned lessons from fellow countryman Shakespeare and became determined to get it right. She was certainly a better role model for succession than “Succession’s” Logan Roy.

Marvin E. Blum

King Charles was groomed early on to be successor to the throne, shown here 54 years ago, following his investiture as Prince of Wales, riding around in the carriage (the royal version of a “truck”) next to Queen Elizabeth and her ever-watchful eye.

Who Did “Succession” Better: Queen Elizabeth or Logan Roy? Read More »

Grateful for My Strong Family “Stock”—The Story of My Uncle Joe Weinstock

My son Adam is a voracious reader. He often sends me articles that serve as inspiration for my own writings. One recent example was the obituary of an American immigrant success story, bringing me a rush of memories of another American immigrant success, my Uncle Joe Weinstock. May is Jewish American Heritage month. In honor of that observance, I write this tribute to a pillar of Jewish American Heritage, my Uncle Joe.

Uncle Joe had no kids, but without question, he was the patriarch of our family. My own success would not have been possible without my heritage from him. Indeed, I wouldn’t even be alive were it not for him.

The article Adam sent me was about the death of John Pappajohn, not the pizza guy but an insurance executive turned venture capitalist. Pappajohn emigrated to the US from Greece. “Showing an early entrepreneurial impulse, he scavenged for metal, rugs, building materials or other scrap he could sell,” (James R. Hagerty, “John Pappajohn, Iowa Venture Capitalist Who Focused on Medical Plays, Dies at 94,” Wall Street Journal, May 5, 2023.) His father died when John was 16, leaving John to support his mom and younger brothers Aristotle and Socrates. Pappajohn’s work ethic and ingenuity rewarded him with wealth, which he used for greater good by donating $100 million to philanthropic causes. In addition to Pappajohn’s immigrant work ethic and philanthropy, two more things about him conjure up Uncle Joe in my head: (1) Pappajohn wore a “PMA” lapel pin, standing for Positive Mental Attitude; and (2) he described himself as the “rah rah” guy, always inspiring and motivating others. In so many ways, Uncle Joe was the Jewish immigrant version of John Pappajohn.

Uncle Joe (actually Yosef, Hebrew for Joseph) was born around the turn of the 20th century in a tiny village in Ukraine called Polona, in the Volyn region, heartland of chasidic Judaism. He was the third of six children born to Eliezer and Leah Weinstock. It was a difficult time for Jews in Ukraine. After a pogrom roughing up the Jews and poking out Eliezer’s eye, Joe saw the handwriting on the wall and embarked on a ship for America. Instead of disembarking in Ellis Island, Uncle Joe’s ship was part of the “Galveston Movement,” funded by New York philanthropist Jacob Schiff to address overcrowding of immigrants in the Lower East Side and the resultant antisemitism. A young, penniless, Joe was met at the Galveston, Texas pier by Rabbi Henry Cohen and the Jewish Welfare, who placed him in Troy, Alabama. Imagine the challenges faced by a religious European Jew in Troy, Alabama, but Uncle Joe managed to remain an observant Jew his entire life. He got a horse and wagon, going from house-to-house peddling fruit. His “Positive Mental Attitude,” grit, and ever-present smile made him successful.

Ten years later, after World War I, Uncle Joe had saved up enough money to bring over his parents and three younger siblings (including my grandmother Pauline, my mother Elsie’s mother). He didn’t have enough money yet to bring over his two older siblings Elke and Enoch, by then married in Europe. Then it became too late. Although Joe’s mother Leah (who shared a bed with my mother Elsie) prayed nightly that Elke and Enoch were still alive, Hitler got to them before Joe could bring them to America.

Joe ran an ad for a wife in the Yiddish newspaper: “Volyner yunger man zucht Voliner maidel,” (young man from the Volyn region seeks a young woman from the same area, in other words a religious wife). Rose Pass from Columbus, Ohio answered the ad. They married and settled in Montgomery. (While at it, they matched up Rose’s sister Ruth with Joe’s brother Moshe— two for the price of one ad!)

Joe started a furniture store and bought rent houses. He never worked on the Sabbath, and he opened and closed the synagogue every day. Uncle Joe always had a song in his heart and on his lips. He too was a “rah rah” guy, lifting up others everywhere he went. In my mind, I can hear him singing one of his favorites, “Adon Olam,” (Lord of the Universe). He was always happy, famously saying, “I never had a bad day in America.”

Beginning in the 1950s, Joe and Rose made an annual pilgrimage to Israel for the High Holidays. When the local newspaper, The Montgomery Advertiser, interviewed him about those trips, they asked, “Do you have family in Israel?” Joe’s answer: “Yes, all the children of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob are my family.”

Joe supported Israeli businesses every chance he could. Once in Tel Aviv, he entered a tailor shop and asked the proprietor if he was a good tailor. The man rolled up his sleeve and showed his concentration camp number, answering that his tailoring skills were how he managed to survive the Holocaust. Joe bought a new suit from that tailor every year.

In 1967 at the outbreak of the Six Day War, Uncle Joe rallied the gathering at the country club in Montgomery. Uncle Joe’s pitch: “You all know the story of Joseph in the Bible. Joseph was a Jewish boy who went to Egypt and got rich. Did he forget his family in Israel? No, he took care of them. We, too, have to help our brothers and sisters in Israel.” Although Joe wasn’t rich, he started the pledging at $5,000 (a huge sum to him, especially in those days), and the crowd followed suit. They had to at least match Mr. Weinstock. He also regularly mailed small amounts to families all over Israel. “I want them to have a challah for Shabbos.” His favorite charity was the Jewish National Fund, site of a tree planting known as the Joseph and Rose Weinstock Grove in Israel. Joe was doing his part to make Israel’s desert bloom.

As part of my Family Legacy initiative at The Blum Firm, I speak often of the importance of preserving family heritage. Knowing stories of our ancestors’ resilience gives us strength to overcome adversity when it strikes in our lives. My daughter Lizzy Savetsky recently gave a speech with that message: “When heavy winds blow our way, it’s the deeply rooted who aren’t blown away. What does that mean to me? My deep roots come from my ancestors. That’s the source of my strength and survival, that I want to pass down to my three children.” Lizzy and I and our whole family are grateful to Uncle Joe for giving us deep roots. Our family has the roots to survive, because we know we come from “good stock,” WEINSTOCK.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s Uncle Joe Weinstock (left) was the family patriarch who passed down an empowering legacy to his heirs, seated here next to his father-in-law, Mr. Pass, and his wife Rose.

Grateful for My Strong Family “Stock”—The Story of My Uncle Joe Weinstock Read More »

Winning the Lottery at “The Woodstock for Capitalists”

This past weekend, the Fort Worth Report published an article on my question for Warren Buffett at this year’s annual Berkshire Hathaway Shareholders’ Meeting—often called “The Woodstock for Capitalists,” according to reporter Bob Francis.

Francis equated my being chosen to ask a question—the first question, in fact—to winning the lottery. As soon as I was handed my numbered ticket for a chance to ask a question, I knew I would be lucky. I looked down at it and I told the guy right then, “This is my year.” I said, “I’ve got this.” And he looked at me and said, “How do you know that?” I said, “Because you just handed me my lucky number.” He’d handed me number 18.

My question for Buffett was about the problem of most parents failing to prepare their kids for the inheritance coming their way. In particular, if the estate includes a family business, most parents fail to do business succession planning to plan for who will run the business on the day when, not if, the founder is no longer there to run it.

The article, “Fort Worth attorney Blum draws a lucky number at ‘Woodstock for Capitalists,’” is here. My post upon returning from the meeting, with additional information, is available here.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum “won the lottery” at this year’s Berkshire Hathaway Shareholders’ Meeting.

Winning the Lottery at “The Woodstock for Capitalists” Read More »

Pearls of Wisdom from Omaha

For many years, our family has been enjoying an annual pilgrimage to worship at the altar of the Oracle of Omaha. Saturday is jam-packed with advice from Warren Buffett (92) and Charlie Munger (99), the sharp-minded and sharp-tongued duo. Each person attending draws his own pearls of wisdom. Here are a few of my golden nuggets.

The day begins with a hilarious video production. This year’s film featured Oscar-winning actress Jamie Lee Curtis, spoofing with Buffett about having a sexual obsession with Munger. Curtis chided that Berkshire Hathaway is a lousy name and should be re-dubbed “Mungeritaville.”

This year’s meeting was streamed live on CNBC. Buffett lamented that the telecast was airing alongside a competitive broadcast, the coronation of King Charles. As consolation, he anointed Berkshire Hathaway’s own royalty: “We’ve got our own King Charles,” the inimitable Charlie Munger.

As I wrote in last week’s post, I was honored with the opportunity to ask my third question, dealing with the importance of preparing heirs for the inheritance coming their way. Buffett delivered an answer I labeled a “Master Class in Family Legacy Planning.” See last week’s post for details (link).

In his typical sharp-edged tone, Munger opined that “a vast diversification of common stocks is an insane idea.” He considers it better to own your three best ideas, admonishing to “ignore advice that leads to the ‘de-worse-ification’ of portfolios.”

Continuing the theme of this year’s annual letter to shareholders, Buffett acknowledged he’s made a lot of investment mistakes, but got a few things right. “Try to get a few things right and sooner or later you’ll have a lollapalooza.” But try to avoid mistakes so big they take you out of the game. “Spend less than you earn, and practice deferred gratification.”

Speaking of making the right decision, Buffett announced my personal favorite of the day: “If you make the right decision on a spouse, you’ve won the game.” He also captured my heart with this investment advice: “Your best investment is always in yourself and in your own earning power.” Buffett added this advice for a meaningful life: “Write your own obituary and try to figure out how to live up to it.” He described the process as “reverse engineering,” writing your obituary now and then living so as to make your obituary come true.

Regarding artificial intelligence (“AI”), the duo acknowledged it’s good for searching all the legal opinions that have been issued over prior decades. But Buffett asserted that AI “can never replace Charlie” and can’t tell jokes (at least not as good as Charlie’s jokes).

Capitalism is a success story, versus an economy like Russia’s where, per Charlie, “they pretend to pay us and we pretend to work.” Moderate social safety nets are needed, but the growth from capitalism helps those at the bottom better than a wide social safety net.

Speaking almost as if directly aimed at me, Buffett warns that even if someone could sell their company at age 65 and make a lot of money, why would you want to retire at 65? Obviously, neither Buffett nor Munger ever wanted to retire, and neither do I!

I always enjoy their foray into lessons for living a meaningful life. Don’t do any unkind acts, or you’ll end up like plenty of people who die with money, but without friends. In being kind, “praise by name, criticize by category.” Avoid toxic people. “Get them the hell out of your life, and do it fast!” If the toxic person is in your family, “it’s a very tough problem,” but do your best to minimize them in your life.

Per Charlie, Elon Musk “likes taking on the impossible job. We’re different. We like taking on the easy job. We don’t want that much failure.” This was in response to a question quoting Charlie as saying he’d rather hire someone with an IQ of 130 who thinks it’s 120, than someone with an IQ of 150 who thinks it’s 170.

Discussing Berkshire’s investment in NetJets, Buffett teased about Munger’s frugality. Charlie used to fly coach from Los Angeles to Omaha for the annual meeting. He said he was surrounded by a lot of rich Berkshire shareholders also in coach, who would clap when Charlie entered the coach section. Warren joked that they couldn’t get Charlie to fly private on NetJets until they put a coach seat in the plane for him.

Charlie also quipped that he stopped practicing law in 1962. “The modern law practice in a big firm is like a pie-eating contest. If you win, you get to eat more pie.” He advised lawyers to stay away from that kind of law firm. I couldn’t agree more! That’s precisely why I created The Blum Firm, providing a quality of life and culture where our team can thrive.

This sampling gives you a taste of the quick wit and brilliance of the two geniuses. What a privilege to learn from them! Charlie turns 100 next year, and Warren will be 93. If you’ve ever considered going, I suggest you join us in Omaha next year. As my son Adam warns me whenever I’m tempted to skip a year, it could be the last one. I certainly hope not!

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin, Laurie, and Adam Blum with a cardboard cutout of Warren Buffett enjoying the 2023 Berkshire Hathaway Annual Meeting.

Pearls of Wisdom from Omaha Read More »

My Third Question to Warren Buffett and “King Charles” Munger

Our family’s annual pilgrimage to the Berkshire Hathaway Annual Meeting includes an early Saturday ritual. Those wishing to ask Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger a question head to a lottery drawing. The few holders of winning tickets get the opportunity. This year was my third time to get lucky and be chosen to ask a question.

Ten years ago, my son Adam convinced me to enter the lottery for the first time. I had beginner’s luck. My first question to Buffett was about his estate plan, seeking an answer to his famous thesis: “I want to leave my children enough so that they can do anything, but not so much that they can do nothing.” I asked: “How much is that?”

Buffett answered: “I think that more of our kids are ruined by the behavior of their parents than by amount of the inheritance. Your children are learning about the world through you and more through your actions than they are through your words. From the moment they’re born, you’re their natural teacher. And it is a very important and serious job, and I don’t actually think that the amount of money that a rich person leaves to their children is the determining factor at all. In terms of how children turn out, I think that the atmosphere, and what they see about them and how their parents behave are more important.”

Two years later at the 2015 Annual Meeting, I got lucky again. Sticking with the subject of estate planning, my second question to Buffett was about the role of philanthropy in his estate plan, including his decision to sign Bill Gates’ “Giving Pledge.” I said: “Today, I’d like to ask about your decision to sign The Giving Pledge, promising to give away at least one-half of your assets to charity. Can you talk about your views on philanthropy and how to balance leaving an inheritance to your family versus assets to charity?”

Buffett’s answer was: “Well, that depends very much on the individual situation, and actually I’ve promised to give over 99% in my case, but that still leaves plenty left over. …So the question is, ‘where does it do the most good?’ And, I think limited amounts do some real good for my children, so I’ll be sure that they have that or they already have it to a degree. And on the other hand, when I look at a bunch of stock certificates in a safe deposit box that were put there fifty years ago or so, they have absolutely no utility to me. Zero. They can’t do anything for me in life. …So, here these things are that have no utility to me, and they have enormous utility to some people in other parts of the world. They can save lives. They can provide vaccines. They can provide education. They have all kinds of utility. So why in the world should they sit there for me or for some fourth generation of great-grandchildren or something when they can do a lot of good now? So that’s my own philosophy on it. But I think everybody has to develop their own feelings about it and should follow where they go. I do think they might ask themselves ‘where will it do the most good?’”

At the following year’s Annual Meeting and each one after that, I continued entering the lottery with no success, until this year. This year, my ticket number was “18,” and I knew it was going to be my day. Eighteen is my lucky number. In Hebrew, the number 18 is represented by the letters Chet (8) and Yud (10), which spells the word “chai,” the Hebrew word for “life.” Upon receiving ticket 18, I thanked the lottery guy and assured him it was my year to win. As I predicted, the number drawn was indeed “18,” and my adrenaline started rushing.

It is intimidating to stand in the spotlight in a room of some 50,000 people, with cameras rolling on live CNBC TV coverage and hear your voice echoing and reverberating as you nervously power through your question. While asking, I was twice interrupted with applause, boosting my confidence. My question this year continued the estate planning theme, focusing on preparing heirs for an inheritance. Even before I finished my question, Buffett jumped in to answer, eager to weigh in. He and Munger then spoke eloquently for more than seven minutes, providing a master class in Family Legacy Planning, my estate planning passion. I am gratified and honored by their enthusiastic response.

Here’s a summary of Buffett’s response to this year’s question as reported by Yahoo Finance: “Responding to a question from an estate planning attorney [Marvin Blum], Buffett said it was imperative to include your heirs in your estate planning. According to Buffett, if the first time children are hearing about the thoughts and wishes of the deceased [parent] is when they read the will, the parents have made a terrible mistake. Buffett went on to suggest that if you intend your heirs to act responsibly and ethically with your bequest, it’s important that you live the ideals you want to pass on to them.”

This year’s “Woodstock for Capitalists” meeting coincided with the coronation of King Charles III, the new monarch of the United Kingdom. Buffett had earlier teased that we had our own King Charles—“King” Charlie Munger. I tied into the other King’s crowning, citing then Prince Charles’ tutelage as the ultimate example of preparing an heir to take over the family kingdom. To use a Texas idiom, Prince Charles “rode around in the truck” (or should I say “carriage”) with his “mum” for more than 70 years, observing and learning from Queen Elizabeth’s commitment to duty and service. Let’s draw inspiration from the British Royal Family and follow advice from Berkshire’s royalty to prepare our heirs for the inheritance coming their way. Long live the Kings, both King Charles III and “King” Charlie Munger, now 99 years old, going strong and as sharp as ever.

Each of my three questions at the Berkshire Hathaway Annual Meetings generated significant media coverage. The press is evidently eager to hear the “Oracle of Omaha’s” wisdom on estate planning, a welcome break from all the questions about investing.

  • Information on the media coverage of my questions to Warren Buffet over the years is available here.
  • A transcript of the Q&A for this year’s question, including Buffett’s complete answer, is available here.
  • CNBC was the exclusive host of this year’s meeting. My exchange with Buffett is available as part of CNBC’s recording of the morning session available here, beginning at the 56:24 mark.
  • A transcript of my 2015 question and Buffett’s complete answer is available here.
  • A transcript of my 2013 question, along with Buffett’s complete answer and the subsequent discussion is available here.

In the words of Tevye in Fiddler on the Roof and symbolic of my lucky “chai” 18, “To life, to life, l’chaim!”

All eyes were on Marvin Blum at the 2023 Berkshire Hathaway Annual Meeting as he poses a question to Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger, the third year Blum was selected as one of the attendees chosen to ask a question.

My Third Question to Warren Buffett and “King Charles” Munger Read More »

The Inspiring Story of Rose Blumkin

As our family embarks this week on our annual pilgrimage to Omaha for the Berkshire-Hathaway Annual Meeting, it brings to mind my all-time favorite example of a family business sale. In recent posts, I addressed the challenges owners face in selling their family business “baby.” Those are choppy waters to navigate. Not all ships complete the voyage successfully. The story of Rose Blumkin’s sale to Warren Buffett is especially legendary.

Tales abound how a small company with a quality product grew by mega proportions after acquisition by Berkshire-Hathaway. Mrs. See’s candy is a case-in-point. Today’s focus is on another business matriarch anointed by Buffett: Rose “Mrs. B” Blumkin.

Berkshire bought 90% of Mrs. B’s Nebraska Furniture Mart for about $55 million in 1983. Buffett declared that Mrs. B, an “89-year-old carpet sales woman would ‘run rings around’ the best corporate executives and business school graduates in America.” (Theron Mohamed, “Warren Buffett: Elderly Carpet Seller Better than America’s Best CEOs,” Business Insider, Dec. 26, 2022.) As usual, Buffett’s prophecy proved true.

Like my four grandparents, Mrs. B immigrated from Eastern Europe as a young child, just in time to escape the Holocaust. She arrived in America penniless and not knowing a word of English but loaded with wit, wisdom, and a tireless work ethic. Similar to my Uncle Joe who pushed a fruit cart to send money home to bring over his parents and siblings, young Rose did the same by selling second-hand clothing.

In 1937, Rose sold all her home furnishings and appliances to raise $500 to open Nebraska Furniture Mart. Over the years, her children and grandchildren joined her, growing the business to today’s sales of $1.6 billion and more than $80 million in after-tax profits.

Buffett saw the writing on the wall in 1983 and convinced Mrs. B to cash out. She reluctantly agreed to sell, citing two reasons: (1) to create liquidity to pay high estate taxes; and (2) to avoid having her kids squabble over the company after she was gone. Rose and her family stayed on to run the business.

The story gets better. After she retired at age 95, Mrs. B found she couldn’t stand retirement. (Is anyone surprised?) Only months later, she opened a competing store across the street called Mrs. B’s Clearance and Factory Outlet and quickly grew it to Omaha’s third largest carpet store. Buffett couldn’t resist—he bought her new store within five years and merged Mrs. B’s two companies. As author Mohamed points out, Buffett “joked that he wouldn’t let Mrs. B retire again without signing a non-compete agreement.”

Rose Blumkin worked until 103 and then died a year later in 1998. Retiring was probably a mistake. Her grandchildren and great-grandchildren now run Nebraska Furniture Mart.

As we now head to Omaha, I’m inspired to go pay tribute to Mrs. B’s legacy.

Marvin E. Blum

Rose Blumkin, pictured on her scooter in her Omaha carpet store, ran (or wheeled) rings around other CEOs, enticing Warren Buffett (right) to buy her store. Blumkin grew Nebraska Furniture Mart into the nation’s largest furniture store before retiring at 103.

The Inspiring Story of Rose Blumkin Read More »

Don’t Beat Yourself Up Over Investment Mistakes

When Warren Buffett’s annual letter to shareholders goes out, my son Adam is among the first to devour every word and send me highlights. As the Blum family prepares to leave next week for our annual pilgrimage to the Berkshire-Hathaway Annual Meeting, I want to share some of “Warren’s Wisdom” with you. We all make investment mistakes along the way. In Buffett’s annual letter, he owns up to his mistakes. I learned an important lesson: Don’t be hard on yourself.

Berkshire fans glorify the investment acumen of Buffett (92) and his partner Charlie Munger (now 99!). If only we had their investment skills! But Buffett humbly shares the reality in his annual letter: “Over the years, I have made many mistakes… In 58 years of Berkshire management, most of my capital-allocation decisions have been no better than 50-50.” The key is to be resilient. Stay the course, and continue taking measured risks. Don’t retreat to a “disappointing investment” like a “high-grade 30-year bond.”

Buffett modestly confesses that in those 58 years, he’s made only “about a dozen truly good decisions—that would be about one every five years.” So, for those of you (like me) who have made some bad investments over the years, don’t beat yourself up. Buffett concludes: “The lesson for investors: The weeds wither away in significance as the flowers bloom. Over time, it takes just a few minutes to work wonders. And, yes, it helps to start early and live into your 90’s as well.”

Consistent with this lesson, I learned that investment guru Richard Rainwater (the pride of Fort Worth, may he rest in peace) had a similar track record. Rainwater’s management of the Bass family money got off to a rocky start. Sid Bass revealed: “For the first two years, every single deal I did with them, I lost every single penny.” (Skip Hollandsworth, “Richard Rainwater—The Invisible Man Behind One of the Year’s Biggest Deals,” Texas Monthly, September 1996).

Rainwater ultimately grew the Bass’s $50 million oil inheritance into a $5 billion fortune (Hui-yong Yu, “Richard Rainwater, Billionaire Texas Investor with Foresight, Dies at 71,” The Washington Post, Sept. 28, 2015.) Yu discloses that those early losses ate up $20 million of the $50 million inheritance.

At this year’s TIGER 21 annual conference, real estate mogul Sam Zell added further support to this thesis. Not every deal will be a home run, or even a triple, double, or single. “Baseball players get paid $25 million if they get a hit one out of every three at bats.” Just being right on a portion of deals will more than offset the losers.

For those like me who have missed plenty of at-bats over the years, I hope this makes you feel better. We’re in good company. And remember, as I’ve quoted my mentor Jay Hughes in past posts, financial capital is only one of five sources of wealth. Don’t minimize the importance of human, intellectual, social, and spiritual capitals. I’ll punctuate that message with the brilliance of my wife of 44 years, Laurie: “In measuring your success in life, dollars and cents isn’t the right way to keep score.” Now I really feel better!

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s son Adam Blum, pictured here with Warren Buffett, as the Blum family prepares for its annual pilgrimage to attend the 2023 Berkshire-Hathaway Annual Meeting.

Don’t Beat Yourself Up Over Investment Mistakes Read More »

Spring Cleaning: Time to Clean Up Mistakes in Your Will

Spring has sprung, and with it comes the perfect time for some spring cleaning. For me, that takes me outside to spruce up my yard (or as we call it in the Blum family, “Marvin’s Garden”). But spring is also the ideal time to do an estate plan clean-up.

Cheryl Winokur Munk offers some great tips in “The Biggest Mistakes People Make With Their Wills” (Wall Street Journal, Feb. 16, 2023). Here are some of her ideas, along with a few extra tips of my own:

1. Not having a Will: The statistics are shocking on the number of people who don’t have a Will, even among high-net-worth individuals. Among the many who overlook having a Will are young adults. If you or your kids are 18 or over and don’t have a Will, the state has one for you, and you won’t like it.

2. Procrastinating: Though it’s tempting to keep putting off estate planning, time is not our friend. The pandemic reminded us that we’re all mortal. Moreover, tax laws are likely to change, taking away some of the best tools in the estate planner’s toolbox. Note that the $12,920,000 exemption cuts in half at midnight December 31, 2025, so it’s a “use it or lose it” situation.

3. Leaving an Inheritance Outright Instead of in Trust: In addition to the risks of passing assets into unprepared hands, leaving an estate outright exposes it to creditors, divorce, and estate tax. A carefully crafted trust can protect the inheritance for future generations.

4. Overlooking Digital Assets: Take steps to make sure someone has your passwords and private keys so they can navigate your digital wallet when you’re gone.

5. Not Updating Regularly: Your assets change, as do the people in your life, so make sure to check whom you’ve named as beneficiaries, guardian for your kids, executor, and trustee. The Blum Firm’s rule-of-thumb is to update your Will at each presidential election.

6. Failure to Change Beneficiary Designations: Many forget that certain assets pass outside a Will, such as life insurance, retirement benefits, and pay-on-death bank accounts. Those “non-probate” assets pass to the person you’ve named on a Beneficiary Designation Form, regardless of what your Will says.

7. Not Drafting for Flexibility: Circumstances change, so don’t set things in stone. Make bequests with formulas or percentages instead of dollar amounts. Give beneficiaries a Special Power of Appointment and designate Special Trustees with power to amend.

8. Your Will Is a Public Document: Preserve privacy with a simple “Pourover Will” that leaves your assets to a Living Trust (which is a private document). Retitling assets into the Living Trust while you’re alive avoids probate.

9. Don’t Forget a Charitable Inheritance: Leave your family two inheritances—a trust to provide for their needs, as well as a charitable vehicle they can use to benefit causes meaningful to your family. In addition to carrying on your tradition of giving, such a charitable inheritance creates powerful family “glue.”

10. Leaving Your Heirs in a Cash Crunch: Engage in “squeeze & freeze” planning to reduce estate taxes and explore life insurance solutions to provide needed liquidity.

11. Don’t Ignore Family Dynamics: Face reality about your family and create a thoughtful plan that heads off resentment and conflicts. Engage in facilitated conversations to open up channels of communication and build trust. Otherwise, when G-1 dies, these simmering issues tend to erupt like a volcano.

12. You Need More than a Will: A Will only tells who inherits your assets. Add a Red File to provide other information such as assets, key contacts, and business succession instructions; an Ethical Will (or Legacy Letter) to speak your heart to your heirs; and a FAST Trust to fund family meetings, family enrichment, and travel to foster ongoing family connection.

Let’s enjoy spring and all the promise it offers us. Here’s hoping these tips from “Marvin’s Estate Planning Garden” will inspire you to do some important spring cleaning.

Marvin E. Blum

Caption: For Marvin Blum, spring cleaning means sprucing up “Marvin’s Garden,” but it’s also a great time to spruce up your estate plan and clean up any mistakes in your Will.

Spring Cleaning: Time to Clean Up Mistakes in Your Will Read More »

“Can We Talk?” It’s Time to Be Candid About Family Dynamics

These were my opening words to the Dallas Council of Charitable Gift Planners: “Can we talk?” (spoken in a New York accent, channeling comedian Joan Rivers and her famous opening line). Having witnessed case after case of what happens when an inheritance falls into unprepared hands, I know all too well the disruption it causes in a family. Joan was joking, but this is no laughing matter. It’s time to “talk” candidly about family disharmony.

I’ve been helping families plan and pass down estates for 45 years. I can say with authority that, in one way or another, every family deals with challenging family dynamics. When you throw an inheritance into that mix, it’s like adding fuel to the fire. As the famous quote goes: “You never really know a person until you’ve shared an inheritance with them.”

Here are a few stories I’ve witnessed that served as wake-up calls to shift me from “head” estate planning to “head & heart” estate planning:

  • A well-meaning grandparent left a trust that doles out a monthly allowance to a grandchild, who now lives a sad and unproductive life in the grandparent’s mansion. The grandchild has no reason to get out of bed in the morning.
  • Siblings at war over control of a family business, a business that has provided generously for three generations, yet is now the source of intense jealousy and hate.
  • Battling siblings challenging a deathbed Will that left family legacy assets all to one child instead of equally to all three.
  • Attending a conference for owners of Family Offices, where the session garnering the biggest turn-out and interest wasn’t a session on investing, tax planning, estate planning, or money management. It was a presentation on substance abuse and addiction. Every family in attendance was dealing with this problem at some level.
  • My own brother’s death at age 65, where the reality hit me hard that a stack of estate planning documents isn’t just about trust structures and saving tax; those documents affect lives. We need to think carefully about the impact of our planning on loved ones we leave behind. It’s not just a bunch of words.

I give a lot of speeches on the topic of Family Legacy Planning, searching for ways to help families improve the odds of multi-generational success. I’ve shared a similar PowerPoint with you before, but for convenience, here’s a link to my recent Dallas speech “In Search of ‘Family Glue.” The statistics are daunting, as 90% fall victim to the adage “shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in three generations.” In this speech, I covered the “Best Practices” of the 10% who succeed.

We will soon wrap up the eight-day Passover holiday, and it brings to mind a part of our Passover Seder celebration where the youngest in the room asks “The Four Questions.” During the Seder, we offer answers to those questions. Similarly, I opened my speech with a different version of Four Questions, along with suggested answers. Here’s a recap of that Q & A:

  1. Q: What keeps you awake at night? A: It’s usually not your money or your investments; most of the time, it’s your family—wanting them to live happy, productive lives.
  2. Q: To what end have I created this wealth? A: My hope is that the assets I leave behind will be used for good and not tear apart my family.
  3. Q: What’s the right amount to leave your kids? A: It’s the amount they’re prepared to receive.
  4. Q: Are your kids and grandkids ready for the inheritance coming their way? A: If not, it’s important to start taking intentional steps to prepare them for it.

As a final point, I’ll reiterate that the “inheritance” that’s passing down to your loved ones isn’t just money. As Jay Hughes teaches in Family Wealth: Keeping It in the Family, the word “it” doesn’t mean money. “It” refers to five sources of family wealth: Financial Capital, Human Capital, Spiritual Capital, Social Capital, and Intellectual Capital. Hughes quotes a grandmother who got “it” when she said: “Our family has always been rich, and we’ve sometimes had money.”

Wishing all a meaningful holiday experience during this spiritual season,
Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum had the recent privilege of speaking about “Family Glue” to the Dallas Council of Charitable Gift Planners.

“Can We Talk?” It’s Time to Be Candid About Family Dynamics Read More »

Culture Eats Strategy for Breakfast

In last week’s post, I expressed gratitude that some hard lessons learned early in my career informed me how to build a caring culture at The Blum Firm. My mission was to create a firm where every team member could thrive, and no one would dread coming to the office. We spend most of our waking hours at work. It needs to be a positive experience.

I shared the journey of my connection with Ed Copley, who grew from being my once feared boss at a big law firm to now being my beloved colleague and Senior Counsel here at The Blum Firm. In discussing that miraculous evolution with my best friend Talmage Boston, I gained some powerful insights. Talmage had run into Ed recently and they talked about how happy Ed is at The Blum Firm and how close Ed and I have become. Talmage credits the environment at The Blum Firm for creating an atmosphere where co-workers can bond and find career satisfaction: “In our personal lives, relationships are everything. In the workplace, culture is everything.”

Talmage followed up that wisdom with a quote from Peter Drucker I’d often heard but never fully understood: “Culture eats strategy for breakfast.” Jacob Engel, in an article for Forbes Coaches Council, enlightened me. “Culture is the secret sauce that keeps employees motivated and clients happy.” Engel uses two stories to illustrate his point.

1. Everyone at Nathan’s security services business had a can-do attitude. Leaders modeled humility, confidence, and integrity. The company’s culture included:

  • Caring about each other and their customers.
  • Empowering everyone to do their best.
  • Striving for feedback, collaboration, and diversity.
  • Reaching for the stars without fear of failing, and if you fail, “at least you will land on the moon.”

It’s no wonder that Nathan’s team gave their all, and his business prospered. “It wasn’t empty talk or something nice on the wall. They knew that the company’s culture was the secret sauce behind their success, and they religiously followed it.”

2. In contrast, Charles put emphasis on processes rather than culture. Instead of caring about each other, there was constant infighting. No one took responsibility for failures. “Culture starts at the top, and as long as the leaders were finding excuses for nonperformance, everyone else did the same.” Is it any wonder Charles’ business was suffering? Processes and strategy, unsupported by a strong culture, will not sustain a business.

Moreover, creating that culture starts at the top. I continually strive to strengthen our culture at The Blum Firm. I’ve been told that even the simple things like my morning walk-arounds to greet each person one by one makes a difference in their day. So do our monthly birthday celebrations and Wednesday lunches. Building a strong culture requires constant care and feeding, and we can always improve. I’ll keep working at it forever.

Culture “eating” strategy signifies that culture is paramount, and it gobbles up processes, rules, and strategic plans for breakfast. Structures are important, but they take a back seat to culture. Putting primary emphasis on strategy and prioritizing it over people (such as adopting a new strategic plan and pushing out good people) destroys culture, which in turn destroys a business. Reacting to my post “It Takes a Team,” attorney Zachary Oliva summed it up: “Culture drives everything!”

As I learned from my mentor Tom Rogerson of GenLegCo., culture drives the success of a business, but it also drives the success of a family. These same principles, modeled by a family’s leaders, can build a strong family culture. Elaborate estate plans with trusts and entities are important, but for a family to succeed and prosper from generation to generation, those strategies must be built on a solid family culture foundation.

Strong core values, caring about each other, celebrating each person’s strengths, honest feedback, encouraging and empowering one another, modeling good behavior—those are the building blocks for a rock-solid culture, essential to sustaining both a business and a family.

Marvin E. Blum

Join Marvin Blum in intentionally creating a strong culture for your business (and your family).

Culture Eats Strategy for Breakfast Read More »

Ed Copley & My Journey from Fear to Friend

I’ve written recently about my journey to create and grow The Blum Firm. As with most endeavors, the path from then to now wasn’t a straight upward sloping line. Especially in the early years, it was more of a roller coaster, replete with mistakes (aka “teachable moments”) and a lot of self-discovery. I’d like to share how one such early “mistake,” seasoned by the passage of time and my corresponding maturity, grew into one of my greatest blessings.

In the summer of 1976, after my first year of law school, I worked in the tax department of Price Waterhouse, and the experience was a perfect match for me. The following summer, I decided to intern at two law firms—one in Fort Worth and one in Dallas—to learn more about a law firm career path. As a Fort Worth boy, my hometown law firm was an easy fit. On the other side of the Trinity River, the Dallas law firm experience was a challenge for me—bigger, faster, and more high-octane. Was it also a fit? Not so much.

The head of the tax department at the Dallas firm was a brilliant, hard-working, and hard-charging man with massive responsibilities on his shoulders. I admired him but was too intimidated to try to forge a connection with him. Once I decided that firm wasn’t the place for me, I made no effort to build a relationship with him. Given how that clerkship went, I assumed he had no interest in me either. I also assumed I’d likely never have contact with him again. His name: Ed Copley.

For decades, that name struck fear in me, conjuring up negative memories of that clerkship experience. As decades unfolded and my Fort Worth law practice grew, it turns out that Ed Copley and I indeed reconnected. He was representing a matriarch in a complicated estate planning transaction that required her children to hire their own lawyer. Lo and behold, the children hired The Blum Firm, arousing fear in me that my relationship with Ed Copley would be tense.

To my surprise and relief, my interaction with Ed was the opposite. He was collegial and welcoming of my input. He treated me, many years his junior, with respect. My fear of Ed Copley melted away.

The story gets better. As The Blum Firm grew, we opened a Dallas office which quickly became vibrant. Our Dallas staff included a senior attorney, Kent McMahan, who had just retired as head of the Trust & Estate department at Fulbright & Jaworski. Still robust, Kent continued his career at The Blum Firm, serving as a powerful mentor to our team. Sadly, Kent passed away, leaving a vacancy I wanted to fill with another senior attorney. Guess who I called to recruit? You got it—Ed Copley!

For the last seven years, Ed has been Senior Counsel at The Blum Firm, bringing extraordinary wisdom, intellect, and kindness to our firm every day. Ed is the consummate role model. We all look up to him and learn from him. Most of all, I regard Ed as a close friend, and our relationship is one of the greatest blessings in my career.

If someone had told me in 1978 that one day Ed Copley would be working at a law firm with my name on the door, I’d have never believed it. What a difference 40 years can make! It still blows my mind, and it teaches me so many lessons. First is to fight off our fears and intimidations and be open to connecting with people in positions of power. They don’t bite, and we can learn so much from them. I now realize the problem wasn’t Ed; it was me. Second is to believe that feelings can change. We evolve and heal, if we will just be patient and have faith. And finally, every “failure” is a learning experience and opportunity to grow. I look back now on that “Big Law” clerkship where I wasn’t a fit and am grateful it helped inform me how to chart a career path and build a law firm (and law firm culture) of my dreams.

To my dear friend Ed, thank you for not giving up on me and for teaching me so much.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s journey with Ed Copley (right), Senior Counsel at The Blum Firm, has come a long way from its rough start in the summer of 1977.

Ed Copley & My Journey from Fear to Friend Read More »

Life Insurance May Be Your Family’s Ideal Solution

Let me clarify at the outset that I don’t sell life insurance. However, The Blum Firm is a big fan of life insurance as a solution to many estate planning challenges. In my speech this month to the Dallas Estate Planning Council, I described seven situations where life insurance came to the rescue (click on this link for my presentation on “Life Insurance Planning Opportunities”).

I started my speech by mentioning that I’m about to attend the 45th reunion of UT Law School’s class of 1978. I reflected on the estate planning world of 1978 compared to estate planning in 2023. If an estate planner from 1978 came back to hear my speech, he would hear a whole new vocabulary and wonder, “What is this foreign language Marvin’s using?” SLATs, Blended Families, Loan-Regime Split Dollar, Mixing Bowl Partnerships, PPLI, Life Settlements, FAST Trusts—none of those were part of estate planning parlance when I started my law practice 45 years ago. Their heads would be spinning.

In this new world of estate planning, planners think “outside the box” to derive creative solutions to address our clients’ needs. Many of those solutions involve life insurance. Here’s an overview of the topics I covered:

  • Each spouse’s SLAT (Spousal Lifetime Access Trust) may buy life insurance on the other spouse to replace assets in the deceased spouse’s SLAT that will benefit the children at the first death.
  • If you love your grandchildren equally, consider a life insurance policy that passes equally to your grandkids, per capita rather than per stirpes.
  • For today’s “Blended Family,” I identified five situations where life insurance can help preserve family harmony.
  • Loan-regime split dollar life insurance can help you “have your cake and eat it too,” removing assets from the estate but preserving a stepped-up basis at death.
  • Using a “Mixing Bowl Partnership” can enable you to shift basis from one asset to another, allowing you use an appreciated asset to buy PPLI (Private Placement Life Insurance) without incurring tax on the gain.
  • Before cancelling a policy, consider selling it in a Life Settlement, often for far more than the policy’s cash value.
  • Create a FAST (Family Advancement Sustainability Trust) funded with life insurance to pay for family retreats, family travel, maintenance of legacy real estate assets, and overall family enrichment after G-1 is gone.

I closed by urging estate planners to address these topics with our clients. Not only will it help our clients and their families achieve their goals, it will also help show our clients that we truly care about them. I concluded by quoting Teddy Roosevelt: “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.”

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum was honored to speak about “Life Insurance Planning Opportunities” to the Dallas Estate Planning Council on March 2, 2023.

Life Insurance May Be Your Family’s Ideal Solution Read More »

White Belt: Mind; Black Belt: Heart—The Martial Arts of Estate Planning

No where is the struggle of listening to your heart versus your head more potent than when engaging in estate planning. When designing an inheritance, my clients are often torn between doing what their head tells them when their heart is pulling in the other direction. I submit that in estate planning, it’s not an “either/or” (head or heart) but a “both.” And for the sake of multi-generational success, the heart is the more dominant force.

This message became clear to me on a recent trip with my wife Laurie to Lake Austin Spa to celebrate our 44th wedding anniversary. For those who know me, it comes as no surprise that I spend such spa getaways going from one fitness class to another, driven to make every minute productive. (I’m not resting on vacations; as my mother-in-law often said: “I’ll rest when I die.”) As the photo reveals, one such class was Tai Chi, taught by fitness guru David Robbins.

Tai Chi, like other Eastern disciplines, is a mix of body, mind, and spirit. At the end of the session, Robbins challenged us to interpret the phrase “White Belt: Mind; Black Belt: Heart.” I’m no karate kid, but I figured out that in the struggle between the two, the heart takes precedence over the mind. In the world of martial arts, a white belt is a beginner while a black belt represents skill, strength, and experience. A mature person puts his full heart into every effort. While your mind is an important part of the process, to achieve a successful outcome requires a heavy dose of heart.

What does this have to do with estate planning? In my 45-year law journey, I spent my beginning white belt years focused on the “head” side of planning. My primary attention was on the technical and tax aspects of estate planning. As I’ve ventured on toward the goal of becoming a black belt estate planning lawyer, I figured out the critical importance of the “heart” side of planning. It takes both—head and heart.

Numerous wake-up calls lead me to this place: inheritances gone bad, sibling warfare, and unprepared heirs. I repeatedly hear my TIGER21 colleagues say what keeps them awake at night isn’t money or investments, but it’s family matters. Experiencing life cycle events like my brother’s death and the births of my five grandkids awakened me to the role of estate planning in creating a lasting legacy. I took a deep dive into the waters of “FAST” trusts, family meetings, family governance, and preserving a heritage. I understand the need to be intentional about achieving multi-generational connectedness (“interdependence”). It takes more than “hope” for a family to remain strong over the years. Hope is not a strategy.

In my search for a label for this type of estate planning, I’ve considered many options: Family Legacy Planning, Qualitative Estate Planning, Holistic Estate Planning, the Soft Side of Estate Planning, Family Governance Planning, and Family-Centered Planning, but the one I keep coming back to is “Head & Heart” Estate Planning. My Tai Chi class makes me think that label may sum it up the best.

The Blum Firm welcomes the opportunity to assist with both the “head” and the “heart” aspects of your estate planning.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s Tai Chi class at Lake Austin Spa reaffirmed his commitment to “head & heart” estate planning.

White Belt: Mind; Black Belt: Heart—The Martial Arts of Estate Planning Read More »

Planning for the Other “Baby” You Raised—Your Family Business

I was recently honored to deliver the keynote address for a symposium sponsored by the Purposeful Planning Institute. The topic was the one I frequently describe as “the most neglected area of estate planning:” Business Succession Planning. Click here for a copy of my PowerPoint.

In the realm of “head and heart” estate planning, transitioning a family business draws heavily from both the head and the heart. All business transfers present challenges for a founder, whether the transfer is to family members, insiders/employees, or outside third parties, but the sale to third parties tends to be most challenging. Indeed, unless we pay sufficient attention to the owner’s personal transition, the transaction almost always fails. Here are three examples where The Blum Firm successfully shepherded the process of selling a business through to closing.

  • Founder and his wife observed that they had done their job educating their children and setting them up in good careers. Ready to retire, charitably inclined, and seeking a steady lifetime stream of income, they transferred their business to a Charitable Remainder Trust (“CRT”). (Note that there are special income tax considerations that apply when transferring a business to a CRT.) The CRT sold the company, deferring income tax on the sale. The tax was paid gradually over the years as the CRT made annual payments to the couple (and later, after the husband died, to the surviving wife). In addition to financial peace of mind, the couple enjoyed knowing that their favorite causes would benefit when the remaining trust funds pass at the survivor’s death to a Donor Advised Fund.
  • The owners of a legacy family business received an unsolicited offer for considerably more than they thought the company was worth. Resisting the temptation to give a quick “yes,” they hired a broker to take the business to market. Four more suitors surfaced and engaged in a bidding war. They ultimately sold to a strategic buyer who paid four times the original offer, in cash. Each child owned some shares and received a generous payout. The bulk of the proceeds went to the parents, who then created a Family Foundation which they enjoy operating. Since the children each have their own wealth, the parents are leaving their estate to the Family Foundation.
  • The self-made creator of a major enterprise was eager to monetize the value of his business and lighten the burden of being the sole “captain of the ship.” He declined multiple offers from private equity firms for fear they might burden the business with debt and lay off employees (whom he considered like family). Instead, he sold the business to a major conglomerate, getting the value out of the company but under an arrangement where he could stay on and run it for as long as he wishes. Also charitably minded, the founder and his wife are donating a substantial portion of their wealth to a Family Foundation.

These three transactions addressed the founder’s head needs as well as heart needs, thereby making it to the finish line with a successful closing. Estate planning advisors are uniquely positioned to help business owners address both the quantitative (head) and qualitative (heart) aspects of business succession planning. I applaud the work of the Purposeful Planning Institute for training advisors to deal with both aspects—in their words, “to fuse the technical aspects of Estate Planning and Wealth Management with relational and legacy planning.” I was honored to be on the PPI Symposium faculty and serve as a champion for the cause.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum delivers keynote on “Business Succession Planning” for the Purposeful Planning Symposium.

Planning for the Other “Baby” You Raised—Your Family Business Read More »

Be Spontaneous and Make a Memory!

I’m an estate planning lawyer who urges people to be careful planners. In my own life, I’m a cobbler who wears my own shoes. I try to plan every detail and contingency in my life. On top of that, I’m extremely practical. That’s me—pretty much a boring, practical planner. (At least I’m self-aware.) I don’t do spontaneous.

So picture this scene. Last Thursday night, after a full week of travel, work, and events every evening, I was desperate for a weekend to recharge. A text arrives. It’s my New York daughter Lizzy, who just scored two Saturday tickets to “Funny Girl,” a perfect father-daughter outing. My immediate response: “I can’t do that. It’s too last minute.” Lizzy wasn’t accepting that. Her reply: “YOLO.” I figured it out—You Only Live Once. My wife Laurie added: “One day, you won’t be able to travel. Do it while you can. Also, you’d drop everything for something bad, so why not drop everything for something good?” Minutes later, I’m booking a 24-hour trip to New York.

I’m writing this post on the flight home, tired but grateful that I broke out of my practical planner mold. Last night with Lizzy was a mountaintop moment we’ll both cherish forever. The show was terrific, but more than that, we made a lifetime memory. Lizzy and I share a lot of the same wiring. The highs and lows of Fanny Brice’s journey as an entertainer resonated with both of us. We felt that joy and pain deeply, and it was even richer because we felt it together.

I had almost backed out. Lizzy discovered that the title role was being performed by an understudy. After a brief internal debate, I proceeded with the trip and figured if it’s not performed by Barbara Streisand, what’s the difference if it’s Lea Michele or someone else? Good decision. The understudy was brilliant.

The last time I did something spontaneous was 12 years ago. Leaving an event, friends invited Laurie and me to join them for five days on a yacht—leaving the very next morning! Again, the practical planner in me instantly declined. Then Laurie set me straight. I reversed my decision, and we had the best getaway ever. I’m grateful to have a wife and daughter who challenge me when my brain is yelling “this makes no sense.” Sometimes we should get out of our comfort zone and do things that make no sense to us. The reward is worth it.

At this point in my life, my top two priorities are relationships and memorable moments. Being practical almost deprived me of a chance to check both those boxes. I suppose a little spontaneity looks good on me, maybe once every dozen or so years.

I’ll close with this wisdom, which sums up my night with Lizzy (sing along with me): “People, people who need people, are the luckiest people in the world.” Indeed, I am.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum made a spontaneous trip to New York to join his daughter Lizzy Savetsky at “Funny Girl,” totally out of character but totally worth it!

Be Spontaneous and Make a Memory! Read More »

Putting a Big Red Bow on Your Estate Plan

I spent Valentine’s Day in Midland, Texas, talking about putting a big red (Valentine-worthy) bow on top of your estate planning package. After signing the package of estate planning documents, our work is not complete until we add the bow on top. The red bow is a “Red File,” a collection of information your family needs to know that is not in your estate planning documents. Click here for a copy of my presentation.

We have described the Red File in a previous post (see “Create a ‘Red File’ to Prepare Your Heirs for What’s Coming”), but the topic is so important it merits covering again today. A Red File provides your family with a roadmap to guide them in four key areas:

  • Your care during incapacity
  • Estate administration upon your death
  • Succession planning for your business
  • Creating a lasting legacy

It includes items such as key contacts, passwords, caregiving wishes, and heartfelt reflections.

A Will tells who inherits your assets, but it doesn’t tell what you own or where those assets are located. Handing an executor a Will without more information is like telling them where to drive your car but not telling them where the keys are.

Like most estate planning tasks, it’s tempting to postpone creating a Red File until “later.” However, playing the waiting game is risky. Once dementia sets in or a traumatic brain injury occurs, it’s too late. Furthermore, death often comes without advance warning. The leading cause of death in the U.S. is heart disease. For two-thirds of women and half of men, their first symptom was death—not chest pain, not discomfort in an arm, not shortness of breath.

Given the uncertainties, I urge all to complete our Red File checklist. This guide is forever a work-in-progress. If you think of items we should add, please forward your ideas to us. We welcome your input to continue improving this valuable roadmap for your loved ones.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum speaking to the Midland-Odessa Business and Estate Council on “A Red File: Putting a Bow on Top of Your Estate Plan.”

Putting a Big Red Bow on Your Estate Plan Read More »

It Takes a Team – and I’m Mighty Proud of Ours

In a recent post I told the story of my journey to create and build The Blum Firm, learning from mistakes along the way (see “When Failure Happens, Send a Thank You Note”). I shared my efforts to create a caring culture, partnering with like-minded colleagues driven to provide first-class estate planning to our clients.

Today I’d like to share an experience from eight years ago that affirmed my efforts were bearing fruit. I received a call out of the blue from the CFO of a family office, engaging in a nationwide search for new estate planning counsel. Months later, the CFO called back to say that after an extensive search, The Blum Firm emerged in first place. Honored and humbled, I wanted to learn more about who we were through their eyes. Why us? The response:

  • The top credentials of our attorneys.
  • The creative “outside the box” planning we provide.
  • The size of our team, as a deeper bench would enable us to staff multiple projects simultaneously.
  • The younger age of most of our attorneys—more likely to be here to assist G-3 and G-4 in years to come.
  • Our reputation for quality work and service.

We’ve now represented this family for eight years, and I’m gratified they often serve as a reference for us. In describing The Blum Firm to others, they add another element to the list—the caring service and responsiveness of our team.

In today’s post, I want to pay tribute to The Blum Firm’s amazing staff. In addition to assembling dedicated attorneys, we take equal effort to hire the best and brightest for the other half of our law firm family. Our paralegals, legal assistants, and all the other members of our support team repeatedly go above and beyond to help us achieve our mission: caring for our clients and each other, collaborating with other advisors and among ourselves, and creating a community of character and talent. Each takes pride in bringing his or her best to work every day. And there’s no ego—we just want the best solutions for our clients.

I’ve seen this commitment in action day after day. Winding the clock back to 2000 when a tornado destroyed our office, our team engaged in the two-year herculean task of sorting through hundreds of boxes of mixed-up papers laden with razor-sharp glass shards to put our clients’ files back together. We’ve been there for client emergencies, literally 24/7, to provide urgent documents and, even more importantly, peace of mind. Hospital visits, home visits, funerals, literally and figuratively handholding for recently widowed spouses—there’s a can-do spirit and a positive attitude. We’re here for you, and we care.

The Blum Firm work community is truly a family. On this Valentine’s Day, I’m sending love to this extraordinary team.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum pays tribute to The Blum Firm team for always going above and beyond.

It Takes a Team – and I’m Mighty Proud of Ours Read More »

You Can’t Take Your Leftovers with You—So How Much Do You Leave to Your Kids?

My 10-year-old granddaughter Stella Savetsky posts a weekly Instagram video, Stella’s Torah Corner, teaching that week’s Torah portion. I always learn a lot from her posts, including her most recent one on the portion Beshalach. After escaping slavery in Egypt, Jews wandering in the desert received daily manna from heaven to sustain them. Whatever manna they didn’t finish at the end of the day was destroyed. They couldn’t take the leftovers with them. Stella wisely provided a Torah lesson that resonates with her estate planning Zaidy: when you die, you can’t take your leftovers with you. Accordingly, you need to plan carefully for where those leftovers should go upon your death. Guiding people in that important decision just happens to be my life’s work.

When parents consider where to leave their “leftover” assets, the knee-jerk reaction is to leave them to their kids. However, after careful analysis, the decision is actually more complicated. How much is the right amount to leave your kids? Returning to the article featured in a couple of my recent posts “The Getty Family’s Trust Issues” (The New Yorker, Jan. 23, 2023), Evan Osnos declares: “The question of how much to leave your kids has been with us since the Ice Age…. [W]hen inheritance patterns reach extremes, they wreak social and political havoc.” All are familiar with stories of inheritances gone bad. Osnos cites two famous examples: “Even some of America’s greatest entrepreneurs saw inheritances as a handicap—a ‘misguided affection,’ as Andrew Carnegie put it. William K. Vanderbilt, a descendant of Cornelius, observed, evidently from experience, that inherited wealth was ‘as certain a death to ambition as cocaine is to morality.’”

What’s the answer? Warren Buffett’s famous advice is “enough so they can do anything, but not so much that they can do nothing.” My position is that the right amount of inheritance is the amount your heirs are prepared to receive. Any amount is too much if it lands in unprepared hands. Having witnessed all too often the disastrous consequences of money going to the unprepared, I embarked on a Family Legacy Planning initiative to encourage families to engage in a thoughtful family meeting process to equip future generations with the skills (financial and emotional) to handle whatever amount is coming their way.

Parents often joke with me that they plan to spend their last dollar on the day they die. Obviously, that only works if you have a crystal ball telling you that date. The reality is that, in the end, there will be “leftovers” to distribute. Here’s my suggestion for a three-part inheritance to leave your heirs:

  • A portion as a traditional inheritance passing to a trust that provides for the health, education, maintenance, and support of your heirs, protected from creditors and divorces;
  • A portion to a charitable vehicle, such as a private foundation or donor advised fund, giving your heirs a second inheritance they can use to benefit causes important to the family; and
  • A portion to a FAST Trust (Family Advancement Sustainability Trust) where funds are not to be distributed to beneficiaries but are to be spent only on family enrichment activities such as family retreats, family travel, preserving a heritage, maintaining a legacy property, and providing programs to educate the family on philanthropy, entrepreneurship, and other worthwhile endeavors.

As you ponder where to allocate your leftovers at death, I urge you to work with advisors to guide you through a thoughtful process. The goal is to design an estate plan that improves the odds of multi-generational success, passing assets down to responsible, empowered (and not entitled) heirs.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s granddaughter Stella Savetsky posts Stella’s Torah Corner on Instagram to teach the weekly Torah portion. Last week’s post contained an estate planning lesson.

You Can’t Take Your Leftovers with You—So How Much Do You Leave to Your Kids? Read More »

Pay Attention to the Signs

Last week’s post explored themes covered by The New Yorker magazine’s article “The Getty Family’s Trust Issues” (Jan. 23, 2023). In writing the article, author Evan Osnos interviewed me for my views on current trends in estate planning. There’s a lot happening in the world of trusts, estates, and tax planning.

For over three decades, we have been living in the “Golden Age” of estate planning. As Osnos quoted me in the Getty article: “‘Conditions for leaving large sums have never been better,’ noting that ‘Congress has not closed an estate-planning loophole in over thirty years.’” However, in the world of my wise friend Mary Staudt, it’s time to “pay attention to the signs.”

Until recently, the estate planner’s tools in our golden toolbox were by and large flying under the radar. Then came 2021. As the pendulum started swinging from Trump-right to Biden-left, writers like Osnos began exposing our tools to the general public. Multiple articles in mainstream media began igniting a public outcry to “Tax the Rich,” as displayed in the photo of Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s met gala gown. Senator Bernie Sanders cleverly labeled his legislation “For the 99.8% Act,” asserting that the tax increases would only hurt 0.2% and would help 99.8%. Senator Elizabeth Warren touted her “Billionaire’s Tax,” which actually applied to anyone with a net worth of $100 million, but the “billionaire” label was more bombastic. Provisions such as these came within two votes of becoming law.

Political turbulence and anti-rich public sentiment are sending a warning call that one of these days “a change is gonna come” (to quote Sam Cooke). With that backdrop, here’s my take on current trends in estate planning.

  1. Take advantage of “squeeze & freeze” tools to reduce estate tax while the opportunity exists. Those who complete planning before a law change will likely be grandfathered.
  2. Engage in “Use It or Lose It” planning to lock in the $12,920,000 estate tax exemption before it cuts in half at the stroke of midnight on December 31, 2025 (when Cinderella’s coach turns back into a pumpkin).
  3. Rising interest rates create a push to do a long-term lock-in of today’s low interest rates on intra-family loans but also make certain tools more attractive (such as Charitable Remainder Trusts and Qualified Personal Residence Trusts).
  4. Inflation and the rising cost of living are motivating parents and grandparents to do more to help kids financially now, when they need it, as opposed to waiting until later to inherit. Ways to help include low-interest loans (such as home mortgages), annual $17,000 gifts, medical/education payments, Section 529 Plans, and gifts to Defective Grantor Trusts.
  5. The economic downturn actually creates the ideal timing to do estate freeze planning such as 678 Trusts, SLATs, and DGTs. Resist the psychological urge to wait on planning until values recover, as pre-recovery planning beats post-recovery planning.
  6. As a premier advocate for both “head” and “heart” estate planning, I note that the pandemic has stimulated a trend to engage in Family Legacy Planning. We became more aware of our mortality, prompting introspection: “To what end have I created this wealth?” Sheltering at home made it more difficult to sweep family dynamics/dysfunction under the rug, encouraging facilitated family meetings aimed at improving communication and trust.

While these trends are on the rise, many still fall victim to the greatest obstacle in estate planning—procrastination. I urge all to recognize that time is flying by, and with all the signs that “change is a-coming,” the passage of time is not our friend.

Marvin E. Blum

The met gala gown worn by Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is literally “A Sign of the Times” igniting public sentiment to “Tax the Rich.”

Pay Attention to the Signs Read More »

Lessons from the Getty Family Estate Plan

In this week’s issue of The New Yorker magazine, Evan Osnos’ article “The Getty Family’s Trust Issues” contains a lot of important messages about Family Legacy Planning. Although the premise of the article is to explore how oil tycoon J. Paul Getty’s heirs have successfully avoided paying millions of dollars of tax, there is a lot to learn from the Getty family story beyond how they managed to save tax. As he was writing the article, Osnos contacted me to discuss not only Getty-type tax saving tools, but broader trends in estate planning. I was honored to provide input for the article about the planning opportunities in the “Golden Age” of estate planning but cautioned that the Golden Age likely won’t last forever.

First, let’s address some of the tools. Osnos points out that J. Paul Getty, America’s richest person, avoided estate tax on his art, property, and land by bequeathing them to a museum trust that established The Getty Center, one of the most visited of all America’s art museums. Paul’s son Gordon Getty, a San Francisco philanthropist, left four sons from wife Ann plus three daughters from an extramarital affair. Gordon included his three daughters in his estate plan by creating a trust for them called the Pleiades Trust, named for a group of Greek mythology sisters who had affairs with Olympian gods and were rewarded by becoming stars in the sky. Much of Osnos’ article is devoted to lengths taken by the Getty family to save tax, specifically by domiciling the trust in Nevada in order to escape California state income tax on the trust income. The trust tax arrangement is exposed by the Gettys’ disgruntled wealth manager Marlena Sonn.

Osnos also references other favorite techniques in the estate planner’s playbook, notably SLATs, CRUTs, BDITs, and GRATs. He shares that the Gettys share the usage of such tools with other mega-wealthy families such as heirs of Walmart founder Sam Walton and casino owner Sheldon Adelson. Other dynastic families also receive shout-outs for their efforts to utilize such tools, including owners of Gallo wine, Campbell’s soup, Wrigley gum, Family Dollar, Public Storage, and Hot Pockets. Osnos also highlights the strategy of holding appreciated assets until death and getting a stepped-up basis, pointing out that Jeff Bezos would avoid tax on a hundred billion dollars of Amazon stock gains if he died tomorrow. To pay living expenses without having to sell the stock during life, many owners of appreciated stock borrow against the stock and live off the loan proceeds, holding the stock till death (described as “buy, borrow, die”).

The important point I want to make is that these techniques are perfectly legal. Osnos draws a distinction between tax avoidance (such as through use of these tools, which is legal) and tax evasion (such as failing to report income or overstating deductions, which is illegal). However, articles like this one and others are shining a light on many of the tools that in prior decades were flying under the radar. Most notably, “For the 99.8%” tax legislation proposed by Senator Bernie Sanders in 2021 aimed to kill a number of these tools but would grandfather anyone who had used them prior to the law’s passage. The law didn’t pass, but the publicity around it stirred up a public sentiment to “Tax the Rich,” as Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s met gala gown proclaimed in huge red letters. As I pointed out in Osnos’ article, “Now that the general public is aware, there is a growing outcry to shut down these benefits. This is a wake-up call that, sooner or later, the tax landscape will likely drastically change.” Those who wish to take advantage of the current opportunities would be wise to act now.

There is more to Osnos’ story about the Getty family than tax avoidance. He also describes competing philosophies among the heirs regarding the purpose of the family wealth. There are different views on where to invest and what causes to support. Dysfunction in the Getty family abounds. Old Paul had five divorces and five sons, whose weddings he didn’t even attend. After his death, the family feud was played out in public view in the courthouse, leading to a forced sale of Getty Oil to Texaco. One of Gordon’s daughters, a beneficiary of the Pleiades Trust, laments that her “abrupt transformation into an heir gave her little preparation for managing a fortune. ‘In exchange for the love I didn’t receive in my life, I got money,’ she said. ‘So, at first, I always felt misery and guilt, and I didn’t know what to do with it.’”

The Getty story is an extreme case of what drives my passion for “head and heart” estate planning. In conjunction with expanding someone’s inheritance through creative tax planning, the estate planning process must also prepare the heirs to be responsible inheritors. Over the last two years, my Family Legacy Planning series has focused on best practices to prepare heirs and bring a family together: family meetings, family governance structure, family mission statement, educating heirs, preserving family history and traditions, business succession planning, writing a legacy letter, family travel—the list goes on and on. Just like the Getty heirs, family members won’t always see eye-to-eye. Communication styles and love languages will differ. But a successful family addresses these matters rather than sweeping them under a rug. The end result is improved communication and trust, as well as family interdependence, so a family is there for each other as a support team when needed.

In my conversation with Evan Osnos, we took a deeper dive into current trends in estate planning. The conversation was stimulated by the Getty story, but my thoughts took off from there. In next week’s post, I’ll highlight more of the modern trends in estate planning that emerged from my involvement with the Getty article in The New Yorker. (The article is available here and here.)

Marvin E. Blum

The New Yorker article “The Getty Family’s Trust Issues” reveals not only Trust estate planning issues, but also issues of trust/mistrust among Getty family members. Marvin Blum was honored to be consulted for the article and quoted in it.

Lessons from the Getty Family Estate Plan Read More »

Should I Sell My Business to a Private Equity Firm?

When it comes to selling a business, some opt to sell 100% to a third-party buyer and completely walk away. However, others find it more appealing to “take some money off the table” but keep a stake in the business, keep management intact, and share in future growth. Before rushing to accept an offer, seek professional advice to help you find the business buy-out solution that best fits your family.

In “Private-Equity Firms Eye Family Businesses” (Wall Street Journal, Sept. 19, 2022), Miriam Gottfried explores the world of private equity business acquisitions. A private equity firm is a firm owned by investors who pool their money to buy businesses. Initially known for billion dollar deals to take big public companies private, private equity firms are now shifting focus to smaller family businesses. Very commonly, the bulk of the family’s net worth is tied up in the business. Such private equity deals offer owners another exit option when they wish to diversify their wealth.

Gottfried tells the story of the Lang family, owners of an 80-year-old pet food business, Ainsworth Pet Nutrition. Partnering with celebrity chef Rachael Ray, the firm was poised to take their brand to the mass market. The private equity firm L Catterton, recognizing the country’s growing obsession with pets, spotted an opportunity.

Rather than selling 100%, the Langs sold 42% but parted with control over operations. Under L Catterton’s management, the business expanded its product line and acquired one of the manufacturers of their merchandise. Fast-forward four years and J.M. Smucker Co. bought Ainsworth for $1.9 billion, earning the Lang family eight times what their stake was worth four years earlier.

Another example hits closer to home for me in nearby Greenville, Texas. Polara Enterprises, a 50-year-old family business, makes pedestrian signals to tell the blind when to cross at intersections. Owner John McGaffey held a “beauty contest” attracting 10 bidders (among them six private-equity firms) and sold a majority interest to Vance Street Capital. In acquiring a stake in Polara, Vance agreed to McGaffey’s conditions: no layoffs of its 80 employees, McGaffey holds a seat on the Board, and his son and son-in-law remain executives. “‘I would have loved to have just left it with my boys, but we felt we could get a lot further in terms of our technology if we could get an outside investor, said Mr. McGaffey. ‘I didn’t want to risk all of my own capital.’” McGaffey continues to own a minority stake that will further benefit him if Polara hits it big.

Gottfried offers other examples to illustrate private equity’s entry into the domain of American family businesses. Neal Rosenthal, owner of Manhattan’s Rosenthal Wine Merchant received nine bids, ultimately selling a majority interest to Incline Equity Partners but remaining as CEO. Realizing that his daughter had no interest in taking over, the 76-year-old Rosenthal achieved peace of mind: “I am confident that if I dropped dead today, my business would continue on without me.” Rosenthal Wine Merchant has since acquired one of its distributors and another wine business, but Rosenthal has the peace of mind that it’s not his capital at risk.

Private equity buyouts don’t always have a happy ending. Examples abound where they load up a company with debt, bring in new management, lose ties with the local community, or expand irrationally and break the back of a once profitable business. All can acknowledge the risks. But with a carefully structured deal, private equity offers a business-selling family another solution to consider.

If selling a business is a part of your family’s succession plan, it’s wise to hire a professional firm to help you consider all your options.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum addresses the trend of private equity firms buying family-owned businesses.

Should I Sell My Business to a Private Equity Firm? Read More »

Life After Selling a Family Business: The Challenges May Surprise You

In recent posts, I sounded an alert about the psychological challenges of selling a family business. It’s hard to part with your “business baby” that you gave birth to and raised since infancy. To improve the odds to making it to closing, Denise Logan cautions to plan for not only the transaction but also the transition.

The family needs to recognize how day-to-day life will feel after selling their company. It will likely feel very different, not only for those who work in the business but even for those who don’t. As author Paul Sullivan describes in “What’s Left After a Family Business Is Sold?” (New York Times, Aug. 9, 2019), “A company often holds families together by giving members a shared identity and conferring a status in the community established by previous generations. Without the company, the family’s perception of itself and its purpose can change, and it is often something that members are not prepared for.”

As a prime example, Sullivan tells the story of the Malt-O-Meal family who sold for $1.15 billion to Post Cereal. John Brooks’ grandfather started the cereal business in 1919, and it gradually grew to be the fourth-largest cereal maker in the U.S. Even four years after selling, Brooks “still felt a void in his life. Since the sale, the three branches of the family have gone their own ways, Mr. Brooks said. They are no longer bound by a company or annual meetings or feel the pride of going through the cereal plants around Minneapolis.”

Aside from the void, family members also have to deal with pressure when a high-dollar purchase price becomes public. Old friends may feel intimidated and treat you differently. New “friends” emerge. Who can you trust? Sullivan describes the awkwardness Sabrina Merage Naim felt when her father and uncle sold Chef America, the maker of Hot Pockets, to Nestlé for $2.6 billion. At the time, Naim was in high school. Naim said that at school, once people saw what the business sold for, friends said, “Oh my, you guys have money.”

Here are tips to help families adjust to life after selling a business:

  • Instead of passively investing the proceeds, establish a family office to actively manage the family’s investments, philanthropy, and shared family experiences. Intentionally engage in planned activities to enrich the family. A thoughtfully structured family office can help provide “glue” that the shared business used to provide.
  • Focus more on shared family values than on shared money. Ideally, that process starts long before the sale. Per Sullivan, “agreeing on family values takes time. But done right, those values can become a substitute for the company.” He refers to the Deary family who sold Great Lakes Caring Home Health and Hospice: “But years before the sale, the family had been formulating a plan for its wealth that focused on family values but also held the members accountable. A family scorecard, for example, tracks their progress on 40 items that the family has deemed important, including working hard, investing wisely, and protecting its legacy.”
  • To guard against dissipation of the wealth by high-living heirs (falling victim to the proverb “shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in three generations”), recognize that passive investment returns rarely match those of a growing business. Brooks urges his Malt-O-Meal heirs to “withdraw no more than one percent a year of his share—still a large amount of money—so that the assets could continue to grow the way his family’s business did.” For future generations to adhere to such a policy requires regular family meetings to educate heirs on investing, family values, family heritage, and the purpose of the wealth. Getting “buy in” from heirs is critical.
  • Join a peer group of similarly situated colleagues. I am actively involved in such a group called TIGER 21. Attending meetings with like-minded peers in a confidential setting allows you to experience lifelong learning, share concerns, and get candid feedback. For me, TIGER 21 serves as my personal Board of Directors. Such a group can help business sellers adjust to life after a liquidity event.

If selling a business is in your family’s future, estate planning advisors can help you plan for all the post-sale challenges. The earlier you start, the better.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum cites the Malt-O-Meal family as an example of the challenges a family faces after selling a business, offering tips to help such a family adjust.

Life After Selling a Family Business: The Challenges May Surprise You Read More »

Time Makes Us Older But Wiser

Happy 2023! Thanks for going with me on this weekly journey of wisdom as I now start year three of my Family Legacy Planning blog. Last week, I put a wrap on 2022 by encouraging us to look back to see how far we’ve come from where we started. Observing that journey can inspire us to keep reaching for our full potential as we now embark on a new year.

My focus last week was on the challenge of remining physically fit as time passes. Today. I want to reflect on how the passage of time can improve our mental and emotional fitness. As Melissa Manchester sings in “Come in From the Rain,” “Time has made us older and wiser. I know I am.”

The two below photos show me with my law school buddies (the “Canoe Brothers,” as described in this May 22, 2022 post.) The “then” photo was on a trip to Port Aransas to celebrate graduating UT law school. Our bodies were fit but so were our minds. Our brains worked quickly with what Arthur Brooks describes as “fluid intelligence.” We had instant recall and could spit out calculations and thoughts quickly with precision. That sharp, razor fast intellect comes in handy in starting a legal career.

However, in his recent book Strength to Strength: Finding Success, Happiness, and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life, Brooks explains a transition that occurs in our brains as we age. After about age 55, our brains work slower but there’s an improvement in our “crystallized intelligence.” We replace fluid intelligence with the ability to connect dots and see big picture patterns. This skill enables us to make better decisions and give better advice because it is seasoned with experience.

Clients often ask me to provide “gray-haired wisdom” based on my 44 years of real-life lawyering. Sharing guidance informed by my observations over the years may be even more meaningful to them than the lightening-fast reasoning of youth. The Canoe Brothers of the recent canoe trip photo have a different kind of intelligence than the guys in the Port Aransas photo, but it’s a kind of brain power that carries more wisdom.

Another shift that occurs over the passage of time involves our emotional fitness. Whereas “young Marvin” had a wish-list of things he hoped to buy one day, the “mature Marvin” has a different list. I have replaced my desire for things with a desire for relationships. My focus is now on having meaningful connection with thoughtful and thought-provoking people. I achieve that best by becoming part of stimulating communities, such as the Canoe Brothers, colleagues at work, civic groups, and a peer group like TIGER 21. According to Dr. Mark Hyman, “The power of community to create health is far greater than any physician, clinic, or hospital. Science now shows us that a sense of community is correlated to longer, healthier, and happier lives.”

Hyman continues with this advice: “If you want to build a community, volunteering, joining a class, and prioritizing time with loved ones are all ways to strengthen your social bonds and support your health in the process. Get involved in things you care about and your community connections will naturally fall into place.”

As we first look back to our early years and then look ahead to our tomorrows, let’s celebrate the opportunities that the future offers us—opportunities to gain wisdom, create connection with meaningful communities, and achieve not only stronger physical fitness but also stronger mental and emotional fitness.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum with the “Canoe Brothers” of then and now, a brotherhood bond strengthened mentally and emotionally by the passage of time. Left: Blum in upper right of pyramid, celebrating law school graduation. Right: Blum in center of front row, on a canoe trip with older and wiser law school buddies.

Time Makes Us Older But Wiser Read More »

The Once and Future Marvin

Here’s to the end of 2022 and welcome to 2023! Each new year brings the promise of new opportunities for personal growth. Before we look ahead, it’s good to wrap up 2022 with a moment of reflection. We can learn a lot about our future potential when we stop to look back at how far we’ve come from where we started.

As I reflect on my early years, my roots are in a loving family of modest means who instilled in me a commitment to family, hard work, and education. With both parents working in Blum’s Café, my preschool afternoons were spent with my Fort Worth grandmother “Bubbie” and her sister. I sat quietly as they watched “As the World Turns,” ate a chicken soup lunch, read the Yiddish newspaper, and napped. That recipe turned me into a scrawny, studious couch potato who watched a lot of TV and invented art projects to entertain myself.

Summers took me to Alabama to visit my mother’s parents. My grandmother Pauline’s cooking, combined with my sedentary lifestyle, soon fattened up that skinny little kid. I blame it on the banana pudding, sour cream coffee cake, and lots of bread with high fat schmears. By fourth grade, I was a chubby kid sitting in Mrs. Gulledge’s class on that fateful day when we learned the news that stands out as my premier childhood memory: President Kennedy spent his last night in Fort Worth’s Hotel Texas and then left for Dallas on the final journey of his life. I became fascinated with world events and was even more glued to the TV.

I start with those memories to compare and contrast the “then Marvin” with the “now Marvin.” I am still a lifelong learner and news junkie, but I gave up my sedentary ways in college. As my friends started to develop a beer gut, I went the opposite direction and discovered physical fitness. I was late to the party, but the benefit is that I developed fitness habits that are part of my daily routine to this day.

I write this post at my daughter Lizzy’s urging. She saw a photo of the young chubby Marvin and pushed me to promote the idea that aging doesn’t have to be a decline. She selected the side-by-side photos to contrast “fat Marvin” with my 2022 gold medal triathlon win.

This message brings to mind an excellent book aptly entitled Younger Next Year. Authors Chris Crowley and Jeremy James describe intentional steps we can take so our tomorrows can be healthier and stronger than our yesterdays. Now is a great time to start, for time flies and, as an inspiring song admonishes, before we know it “A Decade Goes by Without a Warning.” (Thank you to John Batton for recommending that song to me.)

I hope to inspire others to join me in channeling Merlin the Magician from the days of King Arthur, popularized in T.H. White’s The Once and Future King. Like Merlin, let’s attempt to live backwards and “youthen” rather than age. I recognize that prioritizing health and fitness doesn’t guarantee a long life. My brother Irwin was a fit 65-year-old who suddenly died of pancreatic cancer. The message is to do your best to improve the odds but remain realistic about the risks of aging.

As both a fitness guy and an estate planning lawyer, I’ll combine those roles into some recommended New Year’s Resolutions. Yes—eat heathier and get exercise but also make it a 2023 goal to take your estate plan on a “test drive” by asking, if I were suddenly gone, are all my affairs in order?

As we turn now our attention away from the past and toward all the promise that 2023 holds, I wish you a healthy, productive, and meaningful year.

Marvin E. Blum

A chubby young Marvin Blum contrasted against a 2022 triathlon winning Marvin. Looking back on examples of personal growth can inspire us to keep reaching to achieve our full potential.

The Once and Future Marvin Read More »

When Failure Happens, Send a Thank You Note

For last week’s 100th post, I channeled Ben Franklin and shared a mini “Poor Marvin’s Almanac,” a collection of some of my favorite sayings. Here’s another: You learn more from your failures than your successes. When my first job as a lawyer didn’t work out to my liking and I left to open my own firm, my father-in-law Abe Kriger wisely said, “Send them a thank you note.” Abe knew the law firm did me a favor. He assured me I would move on to bigger and better. Because of my dissatisfaction at my prior job, I formed The Blum Firm, which has become the source of immense career satisfaction.

Jim Collins echoes this theme in Good to Great, declaring, “The enemy of great is good.” A job that is just “good” can deter you from creating a career that is “great.” Failure, though painful at the time, opens the door for us to explore opportunities we would otherwise miss.

My prior job experience provided me with a goal when I started The Blum Firm. My mission was to create a work environment where people wouldn’t dread coming to work. I vowed to build a caring culture, one centered around caring for every team member and every client. This law firm camaraderie serves our clients well. Our “open door” environment encourages us to share ideas and stimulates our creative juices. This collaborative atmosphere enables The Blum Firm to generate “outside the box” solutions to address our clients’ needs.

The path from “then” to “now” hasn’t been a perfect upward slope. Failures continue to pop up that provide me with teachable moments. For example, as a young lawyer, I thought I could work with anyone. Early on, I teamed up with some colleagues who turned out were not a good fit. That partnership failed. But, the next time I selected partners, I got it right. I learned from my mistake that I’m extremely exacting and only mesh with others who share my style. Once when I was tempted to bend and hire a lawyer not up to those standards, my law partner Pete Geren awakened me by writing on that resume the words: “Not even close.” I never forgot that lesson.

In a family meeting I facilitated, the patriarch wanted to share his success story. He was surprised when his children preferred to hear about the failures he’d encountered along the way and what he learned from them.

In the Sabbath Torah portion 10 days ago, we read of Jacob wrestling with an angel. Jacob wins the battle. As a result, the angel blesses Jacob and rewards him with a Divine covenant. Like the Biblical Jacob, our greatest achievements and blessings often come to us only by prevailing through a struggle.

As we wrap up the year, may we resolve to see failure as an opportunity. As my son Adam says to me when failure happens, “Don’t be hard on yourself.” And when faced with a risky challenge that offers high-stakes rewards, let’s not allow the fear of failure to deter us. If the worst that can happen is that we fail, let’s remember that failure is a great teacher. The temporary pain is better than not achieving success because we never tried.

Wishing all a Merry Christmas and a Happy Chanukah!

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum celebrates the holidays with his law firm family, grateful his early job failure paved the way to create The Blum Firm.

When Failure Happens, Send a Thank You Note Read More »

My 100th Post: Poor Marvin’s Almanac

When The Blum Firm reached our 40th anniversary in late 2020, I was searching for a way to commemorate it. My law practice had always focused on tax and estate planning, but in the prior decade I had adopted a passion for also helping families create and pass down a meaningful legacy. My goal was to not only prepare the money for the family (passing down the largest possible inheritance), but to also prepare the family for the money (preparing heirs to receive that inheritance). I also began to understand that an inheritance is about a lot more than money. Families pass down not only their financial capital, but also their human, social, intellectual, and spiritual capitals. To celebrate the firm’s 40th, I decided to write a weekly series on Family Legacy Planning to offer tips on how to create family glue, improving the odds of multigenerational success.

When I launched this project, I anticipated telling everything I knew about legacy planning over the course of several weeks. Well, here we are 100 posts later, and I’m still writing. The feedback I’ve received has been immensely gratifying. Each week, I receive encouragement to share more, in particular personal stories from my own life journey. I never expected this blog to take off the way it has, but I am grateful to be reaching this 100th milestone.

In selecting a topic for today’s post, I’m channeling one of our Founding Fathers, Benjamin Franklin, whose Poor Richard’s Almanac became a site for him to offer some good old-fashioned advice for better living. Like everyone, I’ve accumulated a collection of my own words of wisdom. At the urging of a number of you, and inspired by Father Ben, I’ll share some random lessons in life that I hold dear. I’m careful not to push my advice on someone unless they sincerely want it, which brings me to my first piece of advice:

  • From an old “Dear Abby” column: Before you offer someone advice, first ask them if they want it. Unless they respond with an enthusiastic yes, the answer is no.
  • From my wife: Take the high road. (Sometimes we ask her where that is, and she always helps us find it.)
  • From my mother: The most important decision you make in life is who you marry. (I’m glad I listened!)
  • From my father: The only helping hand you need is the one at the end of your own arm.
  • From my son: Work smart, not just hard.
  • From my daughter (the family historian): If you don’t document it, it didn’t happen.
  • From my mother-in-law (always on the go doing “good turns” for others): Don’t go to bed at night until you’ve done at least one good turn that day.
  • From my father-in-law: You catch more flies with honey than vinegar.
  • From my former long-time assistant Mary Staudt: Pay attention to the signs. When someone tells you who they are, you should believe them– the first time.
  • From my best friend Talmage Boston: Ask for what you want. The worst that can happen is they say no, but they might say yes.
  • From a relative Donald Adler about family trips: Remember, it’s everyone’s vacation.
  • Two from my friend Bruce Moon’s mother: (1) Time speeds up; (2) It’s always something. (Isn’t that the truth!)
  • From a dear departed friend Anne Marie Hartsell: When you get upset, remember the “100-year theory.” Ask yourself: Will this matter in 100 years?
  • Marvin’s famous three: (1) Take a light courseload your first semester of college so you don’t dig a hole in your GPA; (2) Wedding planning is a recipe for friction, so the shorter the engagement, the better; (3) It’s never the “right time” to get married, have a baby, or start a business. You just have to do it.
  • I’ll wrap up with a favorite from Ben Franklin, which totally speaks to where my life is now: A true friend is the best possession.

I could go on and on, but I’ll close on that high note. This is just a random list that came to my mind today. I welcome hearing your favorite sayings so I can add them to my collection.

I dedicate these first 100 posts to all of you, whose encouragement has inspired me to keep writing. Many of you have even urged me to write a book on legacy planning. Maybe I’ll tackle that one day. In the meantime, I’ll try to keep these lessons coming ‘till my brain hits empty.

With gratitude,
Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum uses today’s post to offer words of wisdom, channeling Ben Franklin whose Poor Richard’s Almanac offered plenty of good old-fashioned advice.

My 100th Post: Poor Marvin’s Almanac Read More »

Sell a Business, Save a Family

In recent posts focusing on Business Succession Planning, I’ve recognized that often the best solution for the family is to bite the bullet and sell the business. As Denise Logan describes in The Seller’s Journey, that’s a bitter pill for most business founders to swallow. She likens it to the pit in your stomach the day you drop your oldest child off at college. Accordingly, Logan asserts that 70% of business owners fail to follow through to closing. To improve the odds, Logan urges advisors to focus not only on the transaction, but also on the owner’s transition. There are both head and heart issues at play in selling a business.

An example of a business sale success story that did make it to the finish line is Pac Paper, Inc. of Vancouver, Washington, manufacturer of paper sleeves for coffee cups and other paper products. The business had been in the family over 40 years, passed down by father to son David Morgan. Like most business owners, Morgan had no intention of selling the company, assuming it would stay in the family for generations to come. Out-of-the-blue, Morgan began receiving unsolicited call from competitors wanting to buy the company. It got Morgan thinking: who in the family was suited to run the business after him? Hard though it was to admit, Morgan came to the conclusion that the next generation wasn’t in a position to take over leading the business. He also realized that good offers wouldn’t stay on the table forever. Morgan and other co-owners accepted reality and sold the family business to a rival company. They knew that a sale was the best way to preserve family unity going forward.

For those in similar shoes to the Pac Paper Morgan family, there are steps to take prior to going to market that can help the family get the best price. My thanks to Kasper & Associates, a Fort Worth professional merger and acquisition firm, for providing me the following list entitled Business Exit: Tips to Maximize Value:

  • If possible, begin preparing to sell your business 1-2 years before the expected listing date.
  • Get all major shareholders and your spouse to agree with the plan to sell. Don’t assume your spouse or major shareholders will sign whatever is put in front of them to effect the sale. Seek professional help on this matter as needed.
  • Try to keep an open mind about the potential value and be flexible about the terms of a proposed transaction.
  • Explore tax savings strategies with your CPA or other tax advisor.
  • Replace family member employees unless they plan to remain with the business after it is sold.
  • In order to boost your company’s profitability, reduce or eliminate unnecessary perquisites you receive from the business.
  • Replace non-productive employees with productive ones.
  • Develop key employee job descriptions/resumes and an organization chart which includes all employees.
  • Execute employment contracts for key employees.
  • Reduce receivables; clean up your company’s financial reports; update inventory records.
  • Settle liabilities and pending litigation.
  • Spruce up the facility inside and out.
  • Upgrade your company’s technology and fine-tune customer records using up-to-date software.
  • Do post-retirement financial planning with your financial advisor.
  • Develop a relationship with a professional Merger & Acquisition Specialist 1-2 years in advance of anticipated listing date and request an opinion of current market value of your company.

I’ll add another point to this list:

  • Plan ahead to fill the void in your life created by selling the business. I’ll dive deeper into this point in upcoming posts and offer guidance from real-life experiences.

For those of you who are still struggling with the idea of ever selling your family business baby, I’ll close with wisdom from a family matriarch. Dennis Jaffe tells the story of a letter written by the wife of a business founder, read annually to future generations of the family. As precious to the family as the business that “Papa” built is, the matriarch acknowledges in the following Legacy Letter that circumstances could arise where they may have to sell the business in order to save the family:

“Greetings to all of you as you gather for the annual family meeting. I want you to think about a paradox—Money is important./Money is not important. There’s a lot of truth in both statements. You’ve come a long way, babies, but remember where you came from—know your roots. T. S. Eliot said, “Where is the life we have lost in living? Where is the wisdom we have lost in knowledge? Where is the knowledge we have lost in information?”

You need knowledge, wisdom, and vision. It’s our job to be good stewards of the gifts Papa left us. There are pitfalls inherent in having a family business. Be vigilant for the warning signs. I would rather you dismantle the family business than squabble over it.”

I urge all to conduct an honest assessment of your family and determine if the best course is to keep the business or sell it. No matter how precious it may feel to preserve the business, preserving the family is even more precious.

Marvin E. Blum

Selling a family business is a heavy psychological lift but is often the best solution for the family. Marvin Blum offers tips to help business sellers achieve the best outcome.

Sell a Business, Save a Family Read More »

You’re Having a “Liquidity Event” and Making a Gift to Charity: The Order of Events Matters!

In my series on Business Succession Planning, I’ve identified three choices for transfer of a business: (1) transfer to family members; (2) sale to employees/insiders; and (3) sale to an outside third party. After a candid assessment, it often becomes clear that the first choice isn’t a workable option. That leaves the owner with a sale of the business, whether to inside parties or outside parties.

When an owner sells a business, it frequently is the first time the family has substantial liquid assets. That’s why the sale of a business is commonly referred to as a “Liquidity Event.”

On a light-hearted note, I’ve kidded with my wife Laurie that so many of the men I represent who’ve had a liquidity event go buy a bright blue blazer and seem to wear it everywhere they go. Laurie and I call it a “Liquidity Blazer,” and I lamented that I’ll never have a liquidity event enabling me to buy one. We were having this conversation when I was in Las Vegas to give a speech, walking around Caesar’s Mall to pass the time (since you won’t find me at a gambling table). There in the window of Brooks Brothers was the Liquidity Blazer of my dreams, and Laurie made me try it on—perfect fit, no need for alterations. Laurie convinced me that (even without a liquidity event) I deserved it, and I wore it the next day when I gave my speech.

On a more serious note, selling a business also provides the owner with the liquidity to satisfy long-held desires to make substantial charitable contributions. All too often, business sellers contact me AFTER the sale has closed for charitable giving guidance. If only I could wind the clock back, there’s a better order of events that could’ve saved them a lot of tax. Consider this example: Owner sells business for $10 million and then donates $1 million to charity, leaving the owner with $9 million before tax. Owner reports income of $10 million (for simplicity, assume a zero basis), and takes a deduction for the $1 million charitable gift, paying tax on $9 million. Rewind the clock: owner donates 10% of the business just prior to entering into the sales contract. At closing, owner receives $9 million, and the charity receives $1 million. Owner reports income of $9 million and takes a deduction for the charitable gift of a 10% slice of the business (appraised at close to $1 million in value), paying tax on approximately $8 million. Bottom line: by making the gift to charity BEFORE the sale, owner saves income tax on $1 million of the sales proceeds.

The following chart illustrates this timeline. To supercharge the family’s tax savings, note the recommendation to do “squeeze & freeze” planning well in advance of the sale. Such planning shifts the business into trusts that are out of the estate, avoiding the 40% estate tax at death. There are trust structures that allow you to achieve this outcome, yet retain access, control, and flexibility. The most popular trust options are SLATs, 678 Trusts, DGTs, and GRATs. Also note that making the charitable gift too close to the closing date runs the risk of an “assignment of income,” killing the above-described tax benefit. Also, be aware that a pre-transaction charitable gift of a family business needs to be made to a public charity or donor advised fund, in order to deduct the fair market value of the gifted business interest. Consult a tax advisor to help you achieve the best tax outcome.

To take these tax savings up to the limit, consider these two recent examples where the owner gave away the ENTIRE business: electronics giant Tripp Lite ($1.6 billion value) and outdoor apparel maker Patagonia ($3 billion value).

  • Barre Seid donated 100% of Tripp Lite to Marble Freedom Trust, a non-profit devoted to conservative causes. After the donation, the company was sold for $1.65 billion, with all the proceeds going to Marble Freedom Trust free of income tax.
  • The Chouinard family donated 2% of their Patagonia stock (all the voting shares) to a new Patagonia Purpose Trust, and 98% of their stock (all non-voting) to Holdfast Collective, a non-profit devoted to protecting the environment.

Neither family will pay any tax when Marble Freedom or Holdfast sells the business it owns, and all the proceeds will be committed to causes important to that family. Ironically, those causes are opposite: Marble Freedom funds efforts to stop action on climate change; Holdfast funds efforts to combat climate change. That’s yet another example of the polarized world we’re living in today. [Note that since these two nonprofits are politically focused, they are 501(c)4 rather than 501(c)3 organizations, so the contributions to them are not deductible, but the income they earn is exempt from tax. Furthermore, supporters can donate assets that the 501(c)4 sells and avoid capital gains taxes on the sale.] By donating a business to support charitable causes, the entire amount of the sales proceeds goes to charity without diminishing any of it to pay income tax on the sale.

Here’s the key takeaway: if you sell a business or other asset and want to commit part or all of the proceeds to charitable causes, make the gift BEFORE you sell.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum in his “Liquidity Blazer,” reminding all who sell a business to consider making charitable gifts of a business interest BEFORE you sell the business.

You’re Having a “Liquidity Event” and Making a Gift to Charity: The Order of Events Matters! Read More »

Family Legacy Planning: It’s All About Football

Happy Thanksgiving to all! If your home is like mine, part of the day’s traditions will include a football game, with some of us glued to the TV to cheer on the Dallas Cowboys (while others just tolerate it as background noise). Preserving holiday traditions helps keep families connected. Whether yours are more about football or desserts, I applaud the importance of keeping those traditions alive. As Tevye sang in “Fiddler on the Roof,” “without our traditions, our lives would be as shaky as a fiddler on the roof!”

While I’m in a football state of mind, I’ll repeat a favorite metaphor from Jim Grubman. Picture a football field. At one end is a highly skilled quarterback who hurls a perfect pass to the other end of the field. Standing around at the other end are a bunch of clueless receivers. They’ve never been to a practice. They don’t know the rules of the game. They’ve had no experience learning to work together as a team. What are the odds they’ll catch the pass and score a touchdown? Statistics say the odds are only 10%. The quarterback is the family patriarch/matriarch. The football is an inheritance. The receivers are kids and grandkids who have never been prepared for the inheritance coming their way. This football analogy helps us understand the importance of preparing heirs before the inheritance comes their way. That’s what Legacy Planning is all about: improving the odds that your heirs won’t fumble the inheritance football when it comes to them. As Matt Wesley urges, it’s time for the patriarch to move from being the quarterback to being the coach.

In recent weeks, my Family Legacy Planning series has been devoted to the topic of Business Succession Planning. Nowhere is business transition planning more complicated than in the National Football League. Media coverage is replete with family strife over control of an NFL franchise. It’s a hot topic, as the dollars are astronomical, and the transfer of team ownership is imminent. As Ben Fischer reveals in “NFL, Next Person Up,” (Sports Business Journal, Sept. 5, 2022), the average age of the 32 controlling NFL owners is 72. Only eight are below 65. Two of the league’s most powerful are Patriots’ Robert Kraft at 81 and Cowboys’ Jerry Jones at 80. Ready or not, change is coming.

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell (himself 63 and purportedly contemplating retirement) is committed to developing the next generation of owners. The NFL provides apprenticeships in a junior rotational program, promoting the most talented to serve on committees. Every year, each team must report to the NFL who will take over in case of a sudden vacancy. Per Fischer, the ideal scenario is to create “legacy families,” keeping the business in families where the NFL is their top priority. The goal is to pave the way for a smooth transition when guys like Kraft and Jones are gone. The NFL is trying. “But a litany of factors, among them complicated estate planning and unpredictable family, legal and tax dynamics, figure to make orderly successions within a single family the exception rather than the rule.”

The NFL is waking up to the importance of estate planning. It now allows ownership to be transferred to trusts. It’s also lowered the minimum equity ownership of the family’s head to as little as 1%, recognizing the need for families to do planning to minimize estate tax and avoid a forced sale soon after the owner dies. Even with all the NFL’s efforts, challenges persist. Consider these examples:

  • The requirement that teams file an annual succession plan began after Tennessee Titans owner Bud Adams died in October 2013. Adams divided the ownership equally among three branches of his family, leading to a war over which would have power and control over the team. By requiring the annual designation of a successor, the NFL hopes to avoid a repeat of that strife when an owner dies.
  • Alzheimer’s disease forced Denver Broncos owner Pat Bowlen to turn over control to President Joe Ellis in 2014, followed by litigation among his kids over who would succeed him. The result? The team was put up for sale in February 2022 and sold four months later to a group led by former Walmart chairman Rob Walton for $4.65 billion, the highest price ever paid for a US professional sports team.
  • Houston Texans owner Bob McNair died in 2018, leaving the team to wife Janice with son Cal running the show. In the next three seasons, the team fired a general manager, two coaches, and a president. To add insult to injury, the Texans won just four games in two seasons and fell to 17th in attendance.
  • Washington Commanders’ owner Dan Snyder is reportedly considering a sale of the franchise, a team he bought in 1999 for $750 million that now has an estimated value of $5.6 billion. The prospective sale comes after repeated scandals, including accusations of a toxic work environment. There’s a lot of speculation of who a new buyer might be, but any transaction would have to be approved by 75% of NFL team owners. The situation is messy, to say the least, and not the kind of ideal transition the NFL desires.
  • One of the most painful stories involves Joe Robbie, owner of the Miami Dolphins. At his death in 1990, Robbie left behind a wife Elizabeth and nine children. His Pourover Will sent his assets to a Living Trust, and unknown to Elizabeth and most of the kids, he named three of the children as co-trustees. The co-trustees sold part of the franchise to Wayne Huizenga (former owner of Blockbuster Video), infuriating Elizabeth and the six other children. A family feud erupted that tore the family apart. When Elizabeth died almost two years after Joe, she left nothing to two of the kids and only $200,000 each to two other kids. The family had to sell 85% of the Dolphins franchise and 50% of Joe Robbie Stadium to pay a $45 million estate tax bill and to satisfy a claim Elizabeth filed against Joe’s estate.
  • Tom Benson, owner of the New Orleans Saints (as well as NBA Pelicans basketball franchise) changed his Will at age 87, only a month after a court found him mentally competent. The legal battle, filed by daughter Renee and grandchildren Rita and Ryan, cited powerful evidence of incapacity and alleged Benson was being manipulated by his third wife of 10 years, Gayle, then age 68. The new Will gave sole power over the franchises to Gayle, stating: “I specifically provide that Renee Benson, Rita LeBlanc, Ryan LeBlanc, and all of their descendants shall have no interest whatsoever, and no legacy or other inheritance or benefit of any kind shall be paid to any of them under this will or otherwise.” Benson had previously designated granddaughter Rita to control the teams, but everything changed after an argument erupted between Gayle and Rita at a 2014 Saints game. Needless to say, Gayle (who once ran a home jewelry business and was twice previously divorced) won that fight.

The lessons from these NFL horror stories abound. Suffice to say that the solution lies in tackling the problem long before the team owner dies. As my Family Legacy Series continually reiterates, we should learn from the best practices of the 10% who win the Super Bowl of Family Legacy Planning. Don’t fumble the ball like those 90% who fall victim to “shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in three generations.” Your estate planning advisors can help you embark on regular family meetings, create a family governance structure, engage in thoughtful business succession planning, and preserve your family values and heritage—starting right now with some special Thanksgiving traditions!

I wish you all a joyful and meaningful Thanksgiving, filled with gratitude for our abundant blessings.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum is in an NFL state of mind at AT&T Stadium, wishing all a Happy Thanksgiving (and a Dallas Cowboys win!).

Family Legacy Planning: It’s All About Football Read More »

In Search of “Family Glue”

Last week’s post recapped a “Lasting Legacy” evening where I was honored to share the stage with the Coors beer family. I described how the Coors family connection remains strong even among fifth generation descendants of Adolph Coors. Today’s post focuses on my part of the presentation: “In Search of Family Glue: Improving the Odds of Multi-Generational Success.”

After Coors sisters Melissa and Carrie shared secrets of their success, I revealed that the Coors story is the exception. A staggering 90% of families fall victim to the adage “Shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in three generations.” Only 10% of families can tell the Coors story. There is much to learn from them. The bulk of my speech highlights best practices of the ten percenters like Coors. Click here to review my PowerPoint from that presentation.

In a nutshell, I identified 9 best practices of successful families for us to emulate:

  1. Family Meetings
  2. Family Travel
  3. Education Program
  4. Governance Structure
  5. Family Mission Statement
  6. Business Succession Planning
  7. Preserve Family History
  8. Family Traditions
  9. Legacy Letter

I concluded by shining a light on a 10th best practice—Family Philanthropy. By creating a charitable structure in your estate plan, you leave your heirs two inheritances: (1) a traditional inheritance to provide for their security and needs; and (2) a second inheritance giving them the opportunity to use the family assets to give back.

Family Philanthropy is a gift that keeps on giving, not only to the recipients of grants, but also to the donors. Those who give get back more than they give. I described a Family Foundation as a “laboratory” where family members come together to practice group decision making as they jointly select causes to support. As they manage foundation funds, they learn about investing and money management. Through private philanthropy, they can set a vision for their community and shape the future of the place where they live. Moreover, these interactions create connectedness and powerful family glue.

It was a privilege for me to share my thoughts on building family connection. The goal is to create an interdependent family who will be there for each other. In my 44 years of law practice, as well as in my own life, I’ve learned that when adversity strikes, there’s no support system more critical than your family.

I urge everyone to take intentional steps to strengthen your family and create family “glue.”

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum speaking at “Lasting Legacy” seminar sponsored by Tailwind Philanthropic Advisors and The Miles Foundation. Blum shared tips on how to create “Family Glue” and improve the odds of multigenerational success.

In Search of “Family Glue” Read More »

Family Unity: An Evening About Glue & Beer

I was honored to speak recently at a “Lasting Legacy” seminar sponsored by The Miles Foundation and Tailwind Philanthropic Advisors as one of two presenters. My topic was “In Search of ‘Family Glue’: Improving the Odds of Multi-Generational Success.” So there’s the “glue.” Where’s the beer come in? The other presenter was the Coors beer family, a real-life example of multi-generational success and keeping the business in the family.

The event kicked off with a Q&A session with sisters Melissa Coors Osborn and Carrie Coors Tynan, two Generation 5 (“G-5”) descendants of Adolph Coors who founded The Coors Brewing Company in 1873 in Colorado. Adolph passed the company down to G-3: grandsons Joseph and William. Joseph’s 5 sons and William’s son (all members of G-4) all work in the Coors business. Now G-5 is taking up the mantle. Melissa heads up the Coors Family Office. Carrie heads up the Adolph Coors Foundation.

Melissa and Carrie gave an enlightening peek behind the curtain to illustrate how the Coors have preserved family glue for five generations. They credit their ancestors for setting a clear vision, not just for the company, but also for the family.
Many business owners cultivate a solid business culture; the Coors have also cultivated a solid family culture.

The Coors cohesiveness is no accident. Melissa and Carrie revealed how their forefathers intentionally created a governance system. Their ancestors also instilled in them a strong work ethic. Their father made it clear that career choices needed to generate sufficient income for their needs. There would be no “trust babies” relying on a trust distribution to cover their lifestyle.

At family meetings, the sisters shared how they mix business and fun. To provide levity when things get too heavy, there’s a variety of stuffed animals down the center of the table. Each symbolizes a different behavior trait. One example that stuck with me was tossing a donkey at a relative who was acting like a you know what. Laughter erupts, and the tension subsides. Every family needs a system to address conflict—this was a new way for me.

Selecting Melissa and Carrie for their governance roles makes an important point when selecting a successor manager: don’t overlook the females in the family. Statistics show that females fare extremely well in taking over a family business. According to a Merrill Lynch study:

  • Women make more values-based decisions rather than just going for the bottom line. They see money as more than a way to finance the life they want to live but also as a way to meet commitments to themselves and to people and issues they care about.
  • Women live, on average, five years longer than men. Women may be around longer to run the business.
  • Women graduate in higher numbers from college and graduate school today than men (57% of recent college graduates).
  • 42% of women ages 18-64 have a bachelor’s degree or higher.
  • A mother typically spends a lot of energy maintaining the emotional cohesiveness of a family and keeping the peace among family members. This mindset can be a positive force in a business.

So that’s the “beer” story. The Coors example is inspiring. Next week’s post will focus on the “glue” as I share tips on how to create some “super glue” to keep your legacy intact for future generations.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum was honored to share the stage with members of the Coors family at a “Lasting Legacy” seminar. The program discussed how to create “Family Glue” and celebrated the Coors family legacy, a prime example of multi-generational success.

Family Unity: An Evening About Glue & Beer Read More »

When Your Business Succession Solution Isn’t Your Kids

In last week’s post, I shared the story of my son Adam breaking the news to me that he didn’t want to become a lawyer and join me at The Blum Firm. Like many family business owners, I had to come to grips with the fact that the next generation (G-2) wouldn’t be taking over the business. What are the business transition choices when G-2 isn’t the solution? As I concluded last week, there are a lot of options. Let’s explore some here.

As I’ve expressed numerous times, I’m in the camp with many others who often look to Warren Buffett for guidance. The “Oracle of Omaha” is adopting a blended approach. Although none of his children will step into Buffett’s shoes and take over management of Berkshire Hathaway, G-2 will still play an important role. Son Howard and daughter Susan are on the Berkshire Board of Directors “not for operational decisions, but to retain the ‘culture.’ … All three of my children are devoted to maintaining the culture of the place…. They have an unusual amount of devotion to that.” (Eric Rosenbaum, CNBC Leadership Insights, Nov. 14, 2021). Son Peter will also play a role in the family enterprises as director of the Susan Thompson Buffett Foundation (named for Buffett’s late wife) which oversees the family’s charitable giving. This hybrid approach is instructive when the business ownership remains in the family, yet someone other than G-2 handles the day-to-day operations. G-2 can still play an influential role on the board of directors, helping to preserve the family legacy and protect the all-important business culture.

There are numerous other solutions to consider when exploring the options for transitioning a family business. PNC’s Editorial National Practice Group provides an excellent overview of choices in the article “Lowering the Hurdles to a Successful Family Business Transfer” (PNC Insights, Nov. 5, 2021). Here’s a recap of their ideas, as well as some others:

  • Leveraged Buy-Out: If the goal is for some or all of the next gen to purchase the business (as opposed to receiving it as a gift or bequest), G-2 could borrow from a third party, pledge business assets as collateral, and use profits to repay the loan.
  • Installment Sale: The business owner carries a note, and the buyer uses profits to pay off the note over a term of years. The terms are ideally pre-arranged in a Buy/Sell Agreement entered into long before the event that triggers the buyout.
  • Self-Cancelling Installment Note (SCIN): The seller receives a cash flow until the note is paid in full, but any unpaid balance of the note is forgiven when the seller dies. The buyer pays a premium (either a higher price or higher interest rate) for the cancellation privilege.
  • Sale for a Private Annuity: This is similar to a SCIN, except payments continue for the life of the seller, and then terminate at the seller’s death.
  • Non-Qualified Deferred Compensation: The business continues to pay compensation to the owner after retirement. Such payments are deductible by the company, whereas installment payments aren’t. However, the recipient pays ordinary rather than capital gains tax rate.
  • Charitable Solutions: Transfer the business to a CRUT (Charitable Remainder Unitrust) which makes an annual payout to the owner, with the trust assets passing to charity at the owner’s death.
  • Sale to a Grantor Trust: Do a “freeze” sale for a note to lock in the value in the owner’s estate. Explore a sale to an Intentionally Defective Grantor Trust (IDGT), Spousal Lifetime Access Trust (SLAT), and/or 678 Trust (also known as a Beneficiary Defective Trust or BDT). Because of Grantor Trust tax rules, there is no tax on the sale, and the owner continues to pay income tax on the trust’s income for as long as he’s willing, further reducing his estate tax.
  • Retain Key Employees: Using Equity – Grant to employees stock, stock options, restricted stock, non-voting stock, ROFRs (Rights of First Refusal). Using Non-Equity – Grant phantom stock, SAR (Stock Appreciation Rights) Plans, non-qualified deferred compensation, executive bonus arrangements, Stay Bonus Plans/Golden Handcuffs.
  • ESOP (Employee Stock Ownership Plan): An ESOP is a qualified employee benefit plan that buys stock from the owner. Through careful structuring, the owner can defer tax on the sale of his stock by reinvesting in qualified securities. If the owner holds the replacement property until death and gets a basis step-up, the owner’s family completely avoids income tax on the sale.
  • Sale to a Third Party: In many cases, this is the choice that makes the most sense for the family, yet hardest when there’s a strong emotional attachment to the business.

In upcoming posts, we’ll dive into the practical and psychological issues at play in selling a family business. As a foreshadowing, I’ll offer some words of wisdom from Denise Logan, author of The Seller’s Journey. Logan speaks of the feeling you have the day you drop off your oldest child at college. I remember that pit in my stomach when Adam left for UT. Per Logan, that’s the same feeling a founder has when he sells his business. For that reason, more than 70% of owners fail to follow through with selling their businesses. To improve the odds of making it to closing, Logan stresses that advisors must tend to not only the transaction, but also the owner’s transition, helping the owner cope with the prospect of life after selling a business.

As we explore both the “head” and “heart” side of selling your business baby, I’ll offer examples and tips. There’s a way to get there. Even the Rockefellers sold Rock Center.

Marvin E. Blum

Eric Rosenbaum, CNBC Leadership Insights, Nov. 14, 2021 available here.
PNC Insights, Nov. 5, 2021 available here.

Marvin Blum gives a shout-out to his hero Warren Buffett for his wisdom on transitioning a business.

When Your Business Succession Solution Isn’t Your Kids Read More »

The Day Adam Told Me: “I Don’t Want to Be a Lawyer”

I wrote last week about how to improve the odds of passing down a family business to the next generation. Understandably, when founders love their business, most want it to stay in the family. I can relate. As I was pouring my heart and soul into building my law practice, I always assumed my son Adam would one day join The Blum Firm and help keep the Blum legacy alive.

Then one day during Adam’s undergrad years at UT, we had the conversation that awakened me to the fact that Adam’s head wasn’t in the same place as mine. Laurie and I were walking with Adam along downtown Austin’s Sixth Street when he announced: “I don’t want to go to law school. I want to be a banker.” What? I didn’t even know what a “banker” was, at least not the kind Adam meant. I only knew of Laurie’s “banker” career as a bank officer at Fort Worth National Bank. Adam meant a Wall Street “banker,” and before long he headed to New York for an investment banking career at Goldman Sachs. At least Adam did accommodate me by becoming a CPA (though he never practiced accounting), but he tried to get out of that too. When he hit me with the line, “I don’t plan to take the CPA exam,” I wasn’t as accepting. I replied: “You had the misfortune of being born into the wrong family; becoming a CPA is not optional.”

Lizzy had the same potential to join The Blum Firm, given her superb academics and math skills, as well as her heart for helping others, but I learned from Adam not to even hold out the hope. Indeed, when she turned down UT Business Honors to study music business at NYU, reality hit that neither of my kids would join me at The Blum Firm. Neither wanted to follow my footsteps, get up every morning, put on a suit, and “go talk to people about dying.” (Of course, my life’s work is so much more than that, as my fervent passion is to help families create and pass down a meaningful legacy.)

So, here’s the message to family business owners: Don’t assume the next gen is the solution to your business succession plan. I advise all business owners to conduct an honest assessment of their heirs. Do they have the necessary skills to run the business? Do they have the passion and desire? Would they prefer to chart their own career path? Could passing the business down to the next generation lead to family friction that’s just not worth it?

Estate planning advisors can help you determine if an in-family transition is the right solution for your business. It’s better if these conversations are conducted by an advisor who knows you and your family. Parents often have a blind spot about their children’s true abilities. Kids are often reluctant to share their true feelings with their parents for fear of offending them. An advisor with good communication skills (one who has both “head” and “heart”) can interview the stakeholders and provide an objective assessment. Furthermore, whatever is decided, that decision needs to be monitored and subject to modification based on future developments. Business succession planning is never a “one and done” decision, but a dynamic and continuing process like all other aspects of estate planning.

In one case, an 80-year-old father was keeping the business going to pass down later but believed his 60-year-old son was “not yet ready” to take it over. In interviewing the son, the consultant learned that the son really had no interest in running the business and was ready to retire. Imagine the dad’s surprise.

Family business consultant Jeff Savlov tells of a St. Lucia rainforest tour guide business “Oliver & Son” where Oliver Sr. gave top-quality tours, yet a tour experience with Oliver Jr. was the opposite. Oliver Jr. lacked both his father’s skills as well as his father’s interest. “In family businesses, success or failure often hinges on intentionally and proactively developing the next generation. That requires effort to find out if they have interest, desire and ability – supporting/developing them if they do and finding alternatives if they don’t.”

Shark Tank TV personality Kevin O’Leary (aka “Mr. Wonderful”) speaks to this issue in “Kevin O’Leary on the Wealth-Destroying Mistake He Sees Too Many Family Businesses Make” (Eric Rosenbaum, CNBC Leadership Insights, Nov. 14, 2021). “One of the biggest mistakes of all made by successful first-generation founders is when a family patriarch or matriarch assumes the right decision is to turn the business over to their children…. When businesses are wildly successful, it’s often because the founders, a mother or father, have tremendous operational skills but those execution skills may not be present in the subsequent generation. That’s why we see American wealth evaporate within four generations.”

If your business succession solution isn’t to pass down the business to your kids, there are abundant other solutions. In upcoming posts, I’ll address those choices. Some involve ways to structure a sale to insiders (such as certain family members or key employees) using various leveraged buy-out approaches and Buy/Sell Agreements. Others involve deferred compensation arrangements. Still others involve the use of charitable techniques. We will also explore how to keep key employees engaged, either through equity or non-equity incentives. We will also examine the practical and emotional issues involved in selling a business to a third party, whether to a private equity buyer or otherwise. The key is to work with advisors who can help you identify the solution that’s the best fit for your family.

For those clinging to the hope of keeping the business in the family, click on this link to review last week’s post “No One Owns the Tree” to improve the odds of success. But this a decision that requires a heavy dose of reality. If passing down a business to your children isn’t the right business transition plan, don’t force it.

Marvin E. Blum

Jeff Savlov’s Family Minute Business Blog available here.
“Kevin O’Leary on the Wealth-Destroying Mistake He Sees Too Many Family Businesses Make” available here.

Marvin Blum’s son Adam Blum and daughter Lizzy Savetsky hiking in Colorado. As both are charting their own paths and neither became a lawyer, Marvin’s succession plan for The Blum Firm requires a solution other than his kids.

The Day Adam Told Me: “I Don’t Want to Be a Lawyer” Read More »

How to Keep a Business in the Family: “No One Owns the Tree”

Last week’s post described how a family business like Blum’s Café can become like another member of the family. When a family is attached to their business, it’s a strong psychological and emotional pull. The founder’s dream is usually to pass the business down from generation to generation. But to keep a business within the family, you have to cultivate the family to run it. It doesn’t happen automatically.

Consider the example of Hobby Lobby founder David Green. Here’s what I learned in a conversation with Mr. Green in 2019.

  • To pursue his idea of making picture frames in his garage in 1970, Green borrowed $600 from an Oklahoma bank. After one year, he repaid the loan and tried to borrow $1,000, but the bank refused.
  • In 1972, he opened his first Hobby Lobby, a 300 square feet store. Green opened his second store in 1975. He continued to grow, one store at a time.
  • By 2019, there were 900 stores carrying 100,000 items with 40,000 employees and sales of $5.5 billion.
  • Green began involving his children and grandchildren in the business early on, along with their spouses. “We treat in-laws the same as family.” The family gathers in person for team building exercises each month to build trusting relationships and open communication.
  • Green funded 100% of the voting stock into the Green Stewardship Trust, a dynasty trust Green compares to a “ministry.” Heirs are taught that they are stewards of the business, not owners.
  • He describes the Hobby Lobby business as a tree. “No one owns the tree.” Each family member has the opportunity to work in the business and enjoy the fruits of their labors. Per Green, this arrangement “avoids the friction that ownership causes.”

If the goal is to pass the business to further generations, it’s critical to prepare them for it. In “Plan a Smooth Succession for Your Family Business,” (Harvard Business Review, Sept. 13, 2022), Amy Castoro and Fred Krawchuk emphasize that G-1 needs to engage G-2 in the business at a young age. Teach heirs the history of the company, both the ups and the downs. Younger heirs need to shadow family business leaders. The goal is to develop trust, so each believes the other is “sincere, reliable, caring, and competent.” G-1 and G-2 need to agree on written criteria to show when G-2 is ready to take over. As G-1 ages, he must resist the temptation to tighten his controls over the business and instead honor the standards for readiness that were co-established.

I often describe the mentoring process as having G-2 “ride around in the truck” with G-1. One of my clients did precisely that with his son-in-law for several years, so G-2 was ready when G-1 died unexpectedly. Because the son-in-law was trained, the business continued without interruption, avoiding potential disaster. As Mike Benedict of BOK Financial says, “Few things are more frightening than losing the captain of the ship without guidance on what to do in such an event.”

For additional guidance on “Keeping It in the Family,” click on this link for my tips on timing, training a successor, management transition, a cash flow for all owners, and an exit strategy for all owners.

Remember, engaging in planning to pass a business to heirs isn’t only for mega-sized businesses like Hobby Lobby. In “Saving the Family Business in a Beach Town Where Money Talks” (New York Times, Aug. 12, 2022), Alyson Krueger highlights three mom-and-pop shops. In each, the children speak with pride of carrying on a family business. The stories of Daunt’s Albatross Motel, Montauk T-shirts, and Gig Shack on New York’s Long Island are heartwarming.

In each case, the kids grew up embracing the business as if it were another family member. Even though they could close the business and sell the real estate for a fortune, “it was more important to all of us to continue the family tradition” and keep the business alive. That’s how it feels when you love your business like it’s family.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum learned from Hobby Lobby founder David Green that a family business is a tree that no one owns. Heirs are stewards of the business, living off the fruit but protecting the tree for future generations.

How to Keep a Business in the Family: “No One Owns the Tree” Read More »

How a Jukebox Paid for My Bar Mitzvah

This post in my Family Legacy Planning series continues to shine a light on Business Succession Planning. Most of the business succession stories covered in the media involve mega-sized family-owned businesses: NFL teams, major chain stores, media empires, huge conglomerates. We’ll get to those later, but first, let’s come back to earth. Most family businesses are small, yet succession planning is as vitally important to that family as it is for the mega business owners.

I can relate to small business owners. I grew up in such a family. In our home, Blum’s Café was like another family member. It was as if my parents had three children: Irwin, me, and the business. Dinner conversation focused on how business was that day. The opening line at the dinner table was always “How was gesheft (Yiddish word for business) today?” Everyone worked in the business.

As is typical, the business started out small. My father opened an industrial restaurant in Fort Worth’s meat-packing district when I was an infant. Growth was slow and organic, often driven by the need for more money.

As my Bar Mitzvah was approaching, my parents wanted to build up a fund to pay for it. How did they do it? They put in a jukebox—5 cents per song! They literally grew my Bar Mitzvah fund one nickel at a time. When my mom called my dad early in the day before she arrived to be cashier, if music wasn’t playing, she’d say: “Julius, go put a nickel in the jukebox and get the music going.” It worked. I had a first-class Bar Mitzvah, and 55 years later I still cherish the memories.

As college was approaching for Irwin and me, my parents were even more ingenious. The meat-packing workers all wore white frock coats, which by day’s end were literally covered in blood. To pay for college, my parents started a frock rental business and installed a laundry. All the area employees started their day in our café to rent a frock (and hopefully buy breakfast while they were at it.) The profits paid for all of our University of Texas expenses, allowing Irwin and me to graduate debt-free.

When a need arose, I learned early on that you go to work to make it happen. Julius Blum trained us: “The only helping hand you need is the one at the end of your own arm.” His other motto was: “If you take care of your business, it’ll take care of you.” I’m a believer.

After college, Irwin joined the business full-time and expanded the café operation into J. Blum Co., a full-blown meat-packing supply business. As I’ve recounted in previous posts, Irwin was running the business single-handedly after my father died and my mother retired. When Irwin died unexpectedly two weeks after his pancreatic cancer diagnosis, our succession solution was mom Elsie. (See post from March 1, 2022 “Business Succession Planning: Not Every Family Has an Elsie.”) My mom emerged from retirement in her mid-80’s to run the business and fully manage the transition.

As an estate planning lawyer, Irwin’s death was a wake-up call for me. I’m now a major advocate for business succession planning. We were fortunate to have Elsie as a business transition solution, but don’t depend on luck. The smarter approach is to have a succession plan in place, ready to activate when the time comes. And as I learned, that time can hit you completely out of the blue.

Marvin E. Blum

Blum’s Café installed a jukebox to pay for Marvin Blum’s Bar Mitzvah, one nickel at a time.

How a Jukebox Paid for My Bar Mitzvah Read More »

Is Someone in Your Family Hurting?

Is someone in your family hurting? That’s a provocative question. The fact is, for almost every family, the answer is yes. Furthermore, if someone in a family is hurting, generally the whole family feels it. Try as we may to sweep it under the rug, the issue seeps back into our brain and preoccupies us. As I advocate for Family Legacy Planning and Business Succession Planning, the reality is that such processes are impeded until we address what’s hurting us.

Last week’s post coincided with Rosh Hashonah (the Jewish New Year), ushering in a season of reflection, repentance, and spirituality. As sundown tonight marks the beginning of Yom Kippur (the Day of Atonement), I’ll continue to honor the spirit of this holy season with an “estate planning” lesson from renowned Rabbi Shlomo Farhi of New York. My daughter Lizzy attended Rabbi Farhi’s class on one of the central themes of this season: “T’shuvah” (Hebrew for Repentance, though the actual translation is to “Return”). During these Holy Days, we are challenged to turn around and return to more righteous living. Rabbi Farhi shared this parable: A tightrope walker walked down the rope, turned around, and walked back up the rope. When asked which was harder, walking down or walking up, the tightrope walker answered: “Neither journey was the hardest part; the hardest part was turning around.” When we want to change course from a path we’re on, the hardest part is to turn around. After that, we’ve accomplished the toughest part of the journey.

A few years ago, I had a wakeup call at the Annual Conference for FOX (Family Office Exchange) where I learned that most families are indeed hurting. The agenda included all the expected topics for high-net-worth families engaged in legacy planning: estate planning, tax planning, family governance, family education, investing, money management, philanthropy, etc. But there was one topic on the agenda that surprised me: addiction. The presentation from addiction counselors generated the greatest interest of all. It turns out that almost every family was dealing with addiction at some level, and that hurt dominated the family’s psyche. As an estate planner, I learned the importance of meeting a family in the place where it is. In my journey to practice “holistic” estate planning, I realize the need to recognize when a family is hurting and accommodate that in the estate plan design and process.

An effective estate plan needs to fit the family’s reality. We need to engage in honest conversations and design an inheritance appropriately. Trust provisions need to address that reality. Making trust distributions outright to an impaired person can be poison to that person. Trustees need to be empowered to adjust distributions to take into consideration a beneficiary’s dependency.

With my daughter Lizzy’s permission (indeed, encouragement), I will share our own family’s struggle with addiction. In the summer of 2021, Lizzy began her season of reflection with an honest look in the mirror and bravely recognized her dependence on alcohol. On August 1, 2021, she took the hardest step and turned away from a behavior she wanted to change. We are very grateful and proud that Lizzy is now on a sobriety journey, her last drink now more than 14 months ago. As she walks the tightrope back to a life without alcohol, we all recognize the risks. But, she accomplished the hardest part when she turned around. Her journey is not easy, but she wisely chose a support system to help her stay on course.

Lizzy has been very public about her battle against alcoholism, in hopes it’ll give others the courage to turn around and follow her path. That’s why she urged me to share this message, hoping it’ll reach someone who may need help and hope. (To learn more of Lizzy’s story, follow her on Instagram at @LizzySavetsky.)

The third prong of the Blum family mission statement is spirituality. In this season of spirituality, I feel moved to send encouragement to all families who are hurting. At The Blum Firm, we have cultivated resources who may be able to help. Please reach out to us if you’d like information on counselors or programs that come highly recommended. And please know that we’re here for you, with both “head“ and “heart,” to help you design an inheritance plan that’s best suited to your family.

Marvin E. Blum

Left: Putting the Blum family’s mission of spirituality into action when Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky and her family traveled to Israel this summer to dedicate a Torah to the Israeli army. Right: Dr. Ira Savetsky and Lizzy Savetsky in a ritual presentation of the new Torah, celebrated like a wedding.

Is Someone in Your Family Hurting? Read More »

What’s Your Unfinished Business?

This post is coming to you on the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashonah, marking the start of the year 5783 in the Hebrew calendar. A central theme during these Holy Days is a call to action, symbolized during our prayer service by the loud blasts of the shofar (ram’s horn). We reenact this ancient ritual to wake us up, literally and figuratively. The sounding of the shofar ushers in the Ten Days of Repentance, culminating on Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the Jewish year.

This theme of a wake-up call brings to mind a sermon I heard recently in New York. Our daughter Lizzy and her family moved back to New York a few weeks ago after a 3-year chapter in Dallas. Laurie and I went to check out their new surroundings, including their new place of worship, the Alt-Neu (Yiddish for “Old-New”) Synagogue. At Shabbat services, Rabbi Benjamin Goldschmidt alerted us that this is the time of year to “get your affairs in order.” When the doctor tells you that, it’s bad news. This time, the warning is coming not from the doctor, but from the Almighty. The rabbi asked us to think about what that phrase means to each of us. He challenged us to ponder the question: “What’s your unfinished business?”

There are so many aspects to this question, but as an estate planning lawyer, having your “affairs in order” brings to my mind the importance of having a Will. If you don’t have a Will, you should. And, if you have one, is it up-to-date?

I’ll share some shocking statistics. It’s been reported that 73% of those who die in Texas each year die without a Will. Even more startling: 46% of high-net-worth parents have not executed a Will.

Most know the reasons a Will is important, but I’ll recap a few highlights:

  • You designate who will inherit your assets instead of letting state law direct it.
  • You select the person to serve as executor to oversee the passage of your assets.
  • If you have minor children, you name the person to serve as guardian of your kids (the most important provision of all).
  • If you own a business, the Will addresses who will own your business after you’re gone.

That last point ties into the segment I’m now doing on Business Succession Planning. In the last few weeks, I’ve been spotlighting the need to plan for the transition of your business. There are two different elements to address: (1) ownership of your business and (2) management of your business. Ownership is directed by your Will and/or trusts, where you designate who will own your company after you’re gone. Possibilities include leaving the ownership interests to a trust for your family, controlled by a trustee whom you appoint to be in charge. It can also entail creating voting and non-voting stock, so that control rests in hands you deem best suited. Your plan may include a Buy-Sell Agreement, outlining the terms for a buy-out if a family member exits the business. These concepts deal with who will own the company, but that’s different from who will manage it. In a Business Succession Plan, you also address who will run the business, which may or may not be the same persons as the owners. Business owners need both: a Will to direct who will own the company, and a Business Succession Plan to designate who will manage it.

Every person who is 18 or older needs a Will, otherwise the state has one for you that you may not like. Even if you have a Living Trust, you still need a “Pourover Will” to “pour over” any assets you own at death into the Living Trust. Without a Will, estate administration will be far more cumbersome.

As you heed this wake-up call from the shofar and make your own list of unfinished business, give some thought to whether you have an up-to-date Will. And if you own a business, take the extra step to create a Business Succession Plan. This season of reflection is the perfect time to get your affairs in order.

To one and all, I send the Hebrew greeting “L’Shana Tova” (“To a Good Year”).

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum sounding the shofar on the Jewish New Year, a wake-up call to get your affairs in order.

What’s Your Unfinished Business? Read More »

We’re in a “Perfect Storm” for Business Succession Planning

As part of the segment I’m doing on Business Succession Planning, I want to share planning tips I recently presented at Bank of America’s Business Owner Conference. It was easy for me to relate to the audience of business owners, as I grew up in a family business. I understand the attachment they feel to their business, and the reluctance to plan for the day they are no longer here to run it. For people who wake up every day with entrepreneurial energy, it’s hard to imagine the day when someone else is in the captain’s chair. But if business succession planning is done carefully, it will address not only the financial aspects of the transition, but also the psychological aspects. Indeed, it’s the psychological aspects that usually produce the greater challenge.

Why is now the “Perfect Storm” for such planning? Ever since the COVID pandemic, I’ve noticed a heightened awareness of our mortality. Many who behaved as if they’ll live forever began to realize that one day they’ll be gone. As I often say, it’s a WHEN, not an IF, you’re no longer here to run the business. And for those who feel “indispensable,” I often respond with the Charles DeGaulle quote: “Cemeteries are full of indispensable people.”

Therefore, now is the time that more and more business owners are seeking advice on planning tools to pass on their business in the most tax-efficient and family-efficient way. To summarize these tools, I prepared a PowerPoint with seven ideas for business owners to consider. Click on this LINK to review my Bank of America presentation.

Business Succession Planning is not a “one size fits all” endeavor. Each family needs to create the structure that’s the right fit. In my speech, I hit the highlights of “squeeze & freeze” planning techniques, such as Defective Grantor Trusts, 678 Trusts, and SLATs. In addition to locking in the doubled estate tax exemption before it sunsets in half (on December 31, 2025—only three years from now), these trusts also protect all future appreciation from the 40% estate tax. Unless you plan around the estate tax hit, the federal government is your 40% silent partner in your business. Passing business ownership into trusts not only saves tax, but it also protects the business from an owner’s creditors and divorce. Moreover, by using trusts to own the business, you can also carefully select the trustee who will oversee the management of the business when you are gone.

In addition to addressing business ownership, management, and taxes, the plan needs to also address family dynamics. A skilled consultant can help the family navigate the process, doing it in a way that strengthens communication among family members and builds trust. As family consultant Tom Rogerson wisely says: “A strong business won’t sustain a family, but a strong family will sustain a business.” You can’t effectively plan for a family business’ continuity without also planning for family continuity. In addition, the family business is typically inextricably woven into the family’s identity. Letting go of a family business leaves a void in a family’s identity. It also leaves a void in the founder’s self-image and can have a profound effect on self-esteem. Therefore, the plan also needs to help the family “fill the gap” when business ownership and/or management changes hands.

A final note: now is the perfect time to start. Those who are waiting until “the time is right” are often caught by life’s surprises. As Tom Rogerson says, “It’s rarely too early to plan, but frequently too late.” Similarly, life insurance producer Todd Healy confirms: “Five years too early is better than five minutes too late.” Healy analogizes to having an antidote already on hand in case you get a snakebite: “If you don’t have a snakebite kit on hand, by the time you get bitten by a snake, it’s already too late.” A word to the wise: don’t wait until the snake bites to have a kit in place.

I will continue to build on all these themes as we delve deeper into the world of business succession planning. Starting next week, we’ll explore real life stories of business-owning families. I look forward to sharing lessons we can learn from those who did it right, as well as those who didn’t.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum speaking at Bank of America’s Business Owner Conference on the “Perfect Storm” for Business Succession Planning.

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Follow Queen Elizabeth’s Example

As part of the Business Succession segment in our Family Legacy Planning series, I want to pay tribute to a family business matriarch who died last week, Queen Elizabeth. Yes, Queen Elizabeth was part of a family business: the “Royal Firm,” an enterprise with $28 billion in assets. Queen Elizabeth sets an example to put in place a robust transition plan for the family enterprise.

First and foremost, she trained a successor who stands ready to step into her role. Prince Charles has been groomed all his life to now take over the monarchy as King Charles III. One of the primary elements of a business continuity plan is to select and train a successor. Certainly, the lifelong grooming of Charles is an extreme example, but the key is to identify a successor and become his coach. As we often say in Texas, have him “ride around in the truck” (or in this case, the royal carriage) with you to learn first-hand how to do the job.

The Queen also had a plan in place for her farewell and burial known as “Operation London Bridge.” Including that element in your succession plan is a big gift to the family during the first days of grief. The Queen’s plan was activated by sending Prime Minister Liz Truss the code language: “London Bridge is down.” What followed is an orchestrated series of communications to key contacts, media announcements, and fully planned events. Follow the Queen’s lead and leave instructions for your burial, memorial service, obituary, photos, etc. Making those decisions immediately following a loved one’s death is a heavy challenge. Your family will be grateful for the guidance.

Queen Elizabeth also had a plan in place for her assets. The $28 billion in the Royal Firm stays intact, similar to a trust arrangement, to provide ongoing funds to operate the monarchy and maintain the palaces. In 2022, the Royal Firm provided a Sovereign Grant of approximately $100 million to cover such expenses and maintain her household. Providing your family with a source of funding to sustain your business and legacy assets (whether through life insurance or a reserve fund) is likewise important, even if the amount needed has a few less zeros on it.

The Queen also owned approximately $500 million in personal assets. These assets include some $70 million she inherited in 2002 from the Queen Mother’s paintings, stamp collection, china, jewelry, and horses, as well as the Queen’s investments and real estate. It is reported that most of those personal assets will pass to King Charles III. Questioning whether leaving an unequal inheritance to her children will create issues is a topic I covered in my posts on sibling warfare due to unequal inheritances. (See my posts dated July 19, July 26, and August 2, 2022.) Perhaps in the royal context, King Charles’ siblings will be more understanding (or perhaps not?).

Another element of a thoughtful transition plan is to engage in planning to minimize estate taxes. That’s one aspect where the Queen got off the hook. In 1993, Parliament passed a bill exempting the estate of Queen Elizabeth from paying the 40% inheritance tax. As no one in the U.S. enjoys that benefit (unless they were lucky enough to die in 2010, the one and only year with no federal estate tax), I urge all to implement techniques to minimize the 40% U.S. estate tax. In next week’s post, I’ll address some of those “squeeze & freeze” tools available while we’re still in the Golden Age of estate planning.

Rest in peace, Queen Elizabeth, and our gratitude to you for living an exemplary life, all the way to the end.

Marvin E. Blum

Queen Elizabeth created a thoughtful succession plan for her royal duties, her assets, and her final farewell. Let’s follow her example.

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Don’t Be Like HBO’s “Succession’s” Logan Roy: Switch from Quarterback to Coach

In last week’s post, we shined a spotlight on the complicated relationship between the family business and the business founder. I frequently describe Business Succession Planning as “the most neglected area of estate planning.” Many founders have a deep emotional attachment to their family businesses. They can’t bear the thought of planning for the day they are no longer running the business. In my own upbringing, the family business was to be nurtured and raised, almost like it was another child in the family. I can still hear my dad Julius Blum’s voice: “If you take care of your business, it’ll take care of you.” Yet with all that love and affection, only one-third of family businesses successfully pass from G-1 (Generation One) to G-2. Even worse, only 10% pass from G-2 to G-3.

Why the low survival rate? The HBO hit “Succession” offers one cause. Billionaire Logan Roy, although in his 80’s, refuses to yield control of his global media empire Waystar Royco to anyone, even his four adult children. Although fictional, the show’s writers drew inspiration from real-life media moguls the Redstones (who control ViacomCBS Inc.) and the Murdochs (who control The Wall Street Journal). It’s hard for the founder to pass down control. But for the health of the business, there comes a time when the patriarch needs to switch from being quarterback to being the coach (in the words of renowned family consultant Matthew Wesley).

Though the “Succession” story may be painful, many business-owning families can relate. If nothing else, it’s instructive on how toxic behavior can destroy a business and a family. The Wall Street Journal covered this topic in “Succession’s Family Business Drama Hits Close to Home for Some Fans” (November 5, 2021). The article describes how the show “pinched nerves every now and then” for Steve Smith, owner of a family architecture firm: “We identified that this is what we don’t want the family to become. The show has put that top-of-mind again and again and again because it’s so addictive to watch.”

“Succession” is even part of the curriculum in a course at Northeastern University called Examining Family Business Through Film. Professor Kimberly Eddleston describes the show as “a case study in how some founders feel entitled to run their companies until they die, and how some potential successors feel unworthy to take over.”

At The Blum Firm, we have witnessed too many real-life dramas on family business succession. Seeing those has caused us to develop “Business Succession Planning” as one of our law firm’s main offerings. There’s no one-size-fits-all solution. Regardless that the solutions are each unique, the process is generally the same. Hence, we created a Ten Step Business Succession Planning Roadmap:

  1. Start the Process
  2. Create an Action List
  3. Form a Planning Team
  4. Manage Expectations
  5. Identify the Issues
  6. Define the Desired Outcomes
  7. Search for a Solution
  8. Get Buy-In from Key Stakeholders
  9. Address the Challenges
  10. Implement the Solution

We’ll walk you through the specifics in the coming weeks. Suffice to say that at the end of the process, you’ll identify a solution that fits your business and your family. You’ll improve the odds of preserving the family business as a meaningful legacy for future generations. Our goal is to put you in the category of Alan Rosen, CEO of family cheesecake empire Junior’s Restaurants and Bakery, who fought his senior generation to expand beyond their original one store in Brooklyn. Learning from Logan Roy’s mistakes in “Succession,” Rosen is committed to a smoother business transition: “I, unlike Logan Roy, will have a plan.” The Blum Firm would be honored to help you have a plan, too.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum draws lessons from the TV series “Succession” to help in real life business succession planning.

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Business Succession Planning: Every Ending Is a New Beginning

One of the toughest challenges in estate planning is to plan for the transition of a business when the founder is gone. There are so many business and financial, as well as psychological and emotional, aspects to consider. That’s the reason most put off doing business succession planning. They just don’t want to open that can. However, as my colleague Tom Rogerson often says: “Failing to plan is planning to fail.” Failing to carefully plan for the continuity of a business often leads to a bad outcome—bad for the owners, bad for the family, bad for the employees, bad for the customers, bad for the suppliers, bad for everyone involved.

Because of the reluctance of business owners to plan for who will run the business WHEN (not IF) they are gone, I am launching a segment of my Family Legacy Planning Series devoted to Business Succession Planning. In the coming weeks, we’ll explore the do’s and don’ts of succession planning. We will study real life examples of families who did it right and families who did it wrong, learning from their successes and their failures.

Interestingly, the idea for this segment on business transition planning came to me when hearing a sermon from Rabbi Zev Weiner. While in Los Angeles to celebrate our granddaughter Juliet’s 8th birthday, we attended Shabbat services at Young Israel Synagogue. I learned that the Gemara (Rabbinic commentary) teaches why Jewish law on divorce comes BEFORE the Jewish law on marriage. Rabbi Weiner explained that all endings (whether it be divorce, death, job termination, or even the end of a month) are viewed in Judaism as new beginnings. Upon any such ending, the focus is to look to the opportunities that lie ahead, opportunities to start over, find happiness, renewal, rebirth. That’s why marriage teachings come AFTER divorce teachings in Jewish law.

It then dawned on me: the death of a business founder brings an opportunity for business continuity, perhaps even improvements, expansion, a better way. It also creates the opportunity for the founder to create a lasting legacy that endures for generations to come. A life ends, but a legacy begins.

By the same token, TV producer Norman Lear recently celebrated his 100th birthday with two words of advice: “over” and “next.” When something is finished, declare it OVER and don’t dwell on it. Immediately move on to what comes NEXT. That philosophy has served Norman Lear well, a man who continually recharges his creative juices and is still working in his 101st year. But when his time is over, someone else will pick up where he left off and bring on what’s next. Similarly, when any business founder’s work is “over,” it’s important to have a plan in place for what comes “next.”

I look forward to diving deep into business succession planning and exploring all the opportunities it offers.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s granddaughter Juliet celebrates her 8th birthday, marking the end of one year and the beginning of another, filled with the promise of new opportunities.

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If You Don’t Document It, It Didn’t Happen

My daughter Lizzy has become our family’s historian, taking the lead on photographing the moments of our lives. When anyone objects, she admonishes: “If you don’t document, it didn’t happen.” Lizzy is right about the importance of “documenting” our stories, whether it be in photos, videos, or writings. If we don’t intentionally record our history, one day those treasured memories will vanish.

Documenting your legacy is an important part of the estate planning process. Estate planning is so much more than writing a Will. Estate planning is a reflective process, a time to assess what you want to pass down to your heirs aside from your financial assets. Each of us needs to view ourselves as an ancestor. As an ancestor, the goal is to enrich the lives of our descendants, not by making them “rich” with money, but by making them the recipients of a rich and meaningful legacy.

In his article “Our Legacy,” Blake Amos of Trinity Valley School describes our legacy as “what we leave as a pathway for our kids to follow.” Amos continues: “Our legacy is being created whether we are intentional about it or not…. Our legacy is being created every day, so let’s commit to shaping it with intention, thoughtfulness, and care.” As we do so, Lizzy would add, let’s also document that legacy with intention, thoughtfulness, and care.

In the last two weeks, I’ve described the process of creating a video of my mother Elsie’s life story. The feedback has been heartwarming. A number have requested a sampling of the video that includes her “Southern Belle” accent. Click on this LINK for an updated one-minute teaser video with a couple of quotes in Elsie’s own voice, in particular a snippet where she confesses to being a “flirt” to snag Julius when they first met at a Brandeis camp.

I am now gathering photos to slot into the video, and in doing so, I realize how right Lizzy is to urge us to take pictures. How much I wish there were more photos to aid in visualizing significant places and events. What I am noticing is that an important source of photos often comes from weddings. I’ll put in a plug for investing in excellent wedding photography. Some describe an expensive wedding as “driving a car off a cliff,” as Monday morning comes around fast and it’s all over. Not true. Those wedding memories live on for lifetimes, especially through pictures that future heirs will cherish. We keep a photo album of each of our kids’ weddings on our coffee table, and it’s soothing to peruse them from time to time. There’s even research that proves that looking at family photo albums actually lowers blood pressure.

In addition to documenting your story through audio/visual and photos, it’s also important to prepare a written history. Here are a couple of tips on writing your story:

  • Kasia Flanaghan with EverydayLegacies specializes in personal writing coaching and editing to help you write your story.
  • Pat Hawkins recommends StoryWorth, a Christmas gift from his kids that provided Pat a question each week to answer in writing, which was then compiled into a book after a year. Quoting a Jesuit priest who said “The shortest distance between two people is a story,” and a friend who said “An untold story is a secret,” Pat concludes: “It’s my hope that reading the stories in this book will shorten the distance between you and me, and that these no-longer-untold stories will help create a family legacy.”

Indeed, documenting those stories through videos, photos, and writings will not only prove that they happened, but will weave together a memorable legacy. Preserving a family legacy can help preserve a family. As you engage in estate planning, remember to document a family legacy as part of that process. Your heirs will look back on you, their ancestor, and thank you.

Marvin E. Blum

Left: Wedding of Marvin Blum’s parents, Julius and Elsie Blum, 72 years ago. Wedding photos are often the best source of documenting a family’s history. Right: Elsie Blum today, with her five great grandchildren.

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Tips to Create Your Life Story

I revealed last week that I’ve embarked on a video project to document the history of my mother Elsie, and through her, my ancestors. Today, I’ll share more about the process of creating “The Elsie Blum Story.”

First question: Why do it? I’ve emphasized repeatedly the value of a family knowing its heritage in order to remain connected and thriving for years to come. David Issay, creator of StoryCorps, cites research demonstrating that stories connect and heal us. Families yearn for connection. Retelling family memories helps families continually reconnect. We recently had a Blum cousins’ reunion where we sat around retelling old family stories that we all already knew, but everyone left that lunch feeling a deeper bond to each other. Documenting your life story keeps those golden moments alive for future generations. Bruce Feiler reaffirms: “The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative.”

Next question: How to do it? Technological advances make it easier to document your history. The choices range from books, to audio recordings, to videos, to recorded Zooms, to custom-produced films. Resources continue to emerge, including these options:

  • Live On Services – Records a Zoom interview with Ruth Luban prompting you to share treasured memories, traditions, and stories. The extended package incorporates up to 50 photos into the recording.
  • Axcelora – Creates a brief audio recording that goes out at death in a link to loved ones.
  • Life Stories Company – Helps you write your private memoires and create a Life Legacy Book.
  • EverydayLegacies – Records a video/audio history of your family heritage stories.
  • Wells Fargo Family & Business History Center – Generates an oral history in your own words and voice.
  • Epic Bound Books – Publishes a coffee table book.
  • Legacy Commissions Films – Produces a custom family legacy film.

Regardless the route you choose, my advice is to do it now. One reader this week shared: “I wish I knew more about my grandparents’ beginnings and tried to get my mother to tell her stories into a recorder, with no success. I need a kick in the a—to get started.” Well, I’m here to give you that kick, and urge you to engage a service to help make it happen. Many shy away from telling their story. It’s normal to find the process intimidating. When my mom tried to back out, having a third party there to encourage her made all the difference. We worked with Ruth Luban at Live On, who kept the conversation flowing and pulled out some stories from Elsie that I’d never heard. Click on this LINK for a one-minute teaser video of “The Elsie Blum Story.”

Do some advance preparation to make sure you include the most important topics and stories. We used a chronological approach, starting with memories of my mother’s parents and my father’s parents and their escape from oppression to immigrate to America. The focus then shifted to Elsie’s childhood in Montgomery, Alabama during the early Civil Rights movement, followed by marriage to Julius, moving to Fort Worth to raise Irwin and me, to more recent years as a grandmother and great grandmother. The video concludes with inspiring stories of the strength Elsie modeled when she coped with the heartbreaking loss of Julius and Irwin. In her sweet southern accent yet “Steel Magnolia” resolve, Elsie advises future generations to stay strong through adversity and follow her example by clinging to faith, family, and productive work.

I’ll conclude with the words of Ruth Luban in a Live On blog post Preserving Family Heritage: “The fact is, we’re all walking stories, every single one of us. We came into the world with a story on our backs, lifting the life stories of our parents and forbears. Those stories embody traditions, tribes, geopolitical whereabouts, and cultural patterns that inform what our lives will become…. And many people simply don’t realize that their stories actually matter…. Participants have reported how transformative it was to recollect, to attune, to acknowledge their life history…. [That] story is the tapestry within which people thrive.”

I urge you to give your heirs the gift of your life story. It will be a gift that will keep on giving.

Marvin E. Blum

Elsie Blum agreed to do a Zoom video recording of her life story as long as her son, Marvin Blum, sat by her side. The result is a gift the Blum family will forever treasure.

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Update on Elsie: Preserving My Mother’s Story

Every family has a story. Those stories make your family unique. As psychologist Marshall Duke explains, “Ordinary families can be special because they each have a history no other family has.” In writing this weekly Family Legacy Planning series, I’ve revealed stories about my own heritage, especially the stories of my four grandparents immigrating from Eastern Europe to America to escape persecution against Jews.

Research shows that heirs who know more about their family heritage, especially examples of ancestors’ resilience, have higher self-esteem and are better equipped to handle adversity. The best way to teach younger generations about their heritage is by telling stories. For that reason, I’ve become an active proponent to encourage people to document their stories. If not, these precious family jewels will get lost over the generations.

As I advocate for preserving stories, I’ve become the proverbial cobbler who is now taking care of my own shoes. I am now engaged in a full-blown effort to create “The Elsie Blum Story.” I can’t claim the credit for this idea. The seed for it was actually planted when Sam Daniel sent me the following email after reading of my brother Irwin’s unexpected death from pancreatic cancer at age 65, and how Elsie jumped in at age 85 to take over the family business:

Your weekly stories are now a must-read in my inbox! Your story about Irwin touched me deeply. Now this story about your mother is incredible to read! Elsie is a hell of a woman, and I mean that nicely! I think a wonderful way to honor her legacy is to sit down with her for a series of discussions about the family history. At Elsie’s age, she is a walking, talking wealth of stories and knowledge about your family history. Record her voice speaking about her life, your father’s life, her parents and your father’s parents. I wanted to do this with my mother before she passed, but alas, she developed dementia and was gone in a matter of months. Needless to say, I regret that lost opportunity.

Sam’s email was a wakeup call to record my mother’s voice before dementia or death come along (often unexpectedly) and then it’s too late. I wanted that history to be told in Elsie’s charming “Lady Bird Johnson” deep South accent. Fortunately, Elsie at age 91 is still going strong, and 100% sharp mentally. I teamed up with “Live On” to help create a video history of Elsie’s story. A few days before filming began, my mom expressed some reluctance (a common occurrence). She agreed to proceed on the condition that I sit next to her throughout the filming. Thankfully, we have now completed several hours of recordings, and the evidence is preserved. We now begin the next step of converting that footage into a final product.

In next week’s post, I’ll share more specifics about the process of creating “The Elsie Blum Story” and explore various options for documenting a lasting family history. I’ll also share a one-minute “teaser” video of Elsie’s story.

Elsie update: As the attached photo shows, Elsie has now added “runway model” to her resume, selected by The Stayton to model in their recent fashion show. Though her mind is still completely sharp, after two falls in the last couple of years, she agreed it was time to retire her high heels and use a walker. Some may have too much pride to admit the need for walking assistance, but Elsie is a role model to stand tall, use a walker, and walk with dignity. To anyone who is unsteady, please follow Elsie’s lead and take the safe route. It’s not worth falling.

Marvin E. Blum

Elsie Blum, adding runway model to her resume, an inspiration for future generations to stand tall and walk with dignity.

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Unequal Inheritances: Tips from Experts

In last week’s post, I shared a few samples of the high-octane reaction to the topic of sibling strife over unequal inheritances. I brought home the point that such warfare is not exclusive to the mega-rich. Last week’s real-life stories came from families of all levels of wealth.

In today’s post, I want to offer tips I received from other advisors. Like me, they’re in the trenches learning the “do’s” and “don’ts” from seeing inheritances in action, the ones that worked and the that went awry.

From a life insurance advisor:
I wish families could see how dangerous it is to family harmony to try and split things like businesses and land among three and four kids. Obviously, I am biased to the insurance industry as a solution but the creation of cash at death for the purpose of estate division can be a huge key to maintaining the relationships in the family. If people truly realized its power, they would be actively pursuing getting as much life insurance coverage as they can.

From a family counselor/life coach:
Having a third-party mentoring the children to prepare them for what is in their future is a great remedy and it reduces the risk of relational issues. It doesn’t eliminate the risk, but it does reduce it.

From a trust officer:
I am in favor of equal division to avoid family conflict. Another problem we see is pot trusts (a trust for multiple beneficiaries where distributions are made to the individual beneficiaries as needed, and there’s no score-keeping)—nobody is happy if one sibling has more needs than others. It is better to have an estate split into equal separate trusts, with the irresponsible sibling having a corporate trustee and the other siblings serving as their own trustee. That way the siblings understand that each of the siblings received the same amount from the parents’ estates and that everyone’s shares are in trust.

From another trust officer:
Seriously consider naming a corporate trustee, if for no other purpose than to administer the estate before the split and each child can take over their own trust at that point. Naming a corporate trustee to serve for the first few years only can often diminish the tendency of the heirs to go after each other. This is especially effective if the corporate trustee is brought into the conversation with the adult children and it is understood that getting through the estate tax filing, any probate, and the initial winding up of the decedent’s dealings is not only not fun, but it can be exhausting and beyond the capability of heirs. And, by the time each heir hires their own lawyer to represent them as fiduciary (in that scenario no one generally believes their interests are truly aligned, someone always believes the other heir is somehow going to try to take advantage of the situation), it quickly becomes obvious that the corporate fiduciary appointed to just get through the administrative phase of the estate is well worth the cost.

Once the estate distributes to the resulting trusts, the heir can become the sole trustee at that point and can do what they want. They can move the assets from the corporate trustee, or if the corporate trustee has done its job well, retain the relationship as a value-added partner.

Experience has shown me how ugly it can get when mom and dad swore in our conference room “our children definitely get along well, they won’t have any problems.” What is always underestimated is the influence of the siblings’ spouses as well.

From a financial advisor:
Thanks for another important article. I’m observing over time that more and more of my work and of the value that my practice offers to families has to do with developing thoughtful ways to increase family communication and understanding of the hopes and wishes of the parents, as well as their kids. Of course, this then interconnects with every other aspect of the family enterprise from business management to family governance to estate planning to portfolio management.

I couldn’t have said it better myself.

A final tip from me: When parents are debating leaving an unequal inheritance to their kids, I often advise them to consider making unequal distributions to the kids while the parents are alive, without keeping score. However, when it comes to the Will, leave the estate in equal shares. A Will is a permanent document, and having a reminder of inequality out there forever can continue to sting. If kids aren’t equally capable of managing the assets, leave the assets in equal trusts for each child, and carefully select the appropriate trustee to manage each of the trusts. That way, ownership is equal, even if management is not.

There is no “right” or “wrong” answer; no “one size fits all.” The key is to engage in a thoughtful process, seeking guidance from estate planning advisors who bring experience, wisdom, objectivity, “head,” and “heart” to the table. Every family wrestles with its own dynamics. Address the issues; don’t sweep them under the rug. I urge you to consult with experts who are here to help your family build a lasting and meaningful legacy.

Marvin E. Blum

Tribute to sisterhood: the first post-pandemic reunion of Marvin Blum’s wife Laurie and her three sisters. Even during the separation, the four sisters stayed closely connected on Zoom and by phone, fulfilling their parents’ mission for the family to always remain close. (Left to right: David and Linda Usdan, Peggy and William Adler, Laurie and Marvin Blum, and Diane and Barry Wilen.)

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Title: Sibling Warfare: Reader Reactions

My Sibling Warfare post on June 28th, together with last week’s post on unequal inheritances, have really struck a nerve. Not surprisingly, many families are struggling with sibling conflict. The feedback I’ve received has been so informative that I’ll share some highlights with you.

The five stories of family feuds in my June 28 post created quite a stir. WealthManagment.com picked up the article and published an edited version here entitled “Five Famous Families Undermined by Sibling Conflict.”

Those five examples illustrate what can happen when sibling rivalry grows into fighting of epic proportions. Although those five families are all mega wealthy, I’m reminded that family infighting is not limited to the ultra-rich. In the feedback, I learned stories of sibling strife in families of moderate means that are equally toxic.

Several stories involved leaving the family home to only one of the kids, for reasons that appeared fair to the parents, yet the news was not well-received by the other kids. Part of the distress was related to financial disparity of the inheritances but much more was due to hurt feelings. In these stories, the prevailing view was for the parents to do their best to explain their reasons, and even if there’s no buy-in from all the children, at least there were no surprises when the Will was read.

Other stories I received involve family businesses left unequally to the kids. Again, the parents had valid reasons for the unequal division, such as leaving more to those active in the business and attempting to make up the difference by leaving other assets to those not active in the business. In one extreme case, the entire business (considered the family’s premier asset) went to one kid and real estate (of much lower value) to the other kid. The one getting the real estate felt slighted, but watch what happened. Fast forward years later and the business was bankrupt while the real estate soared in value.

One mother shared with me an ongoing internal debate over her plan to leave the estate equally to her four children in an effort to preserve family harmony but was concerned about one child being of much lesser means. The mother held a heart-to-heart family meeting to explain her intentions and seek a moral commitment from the children to be there for each other and use the inheritance to support a sibling, if ever needed.

Yet another story involved two siblings, one very responsible and the other terribly irresponsible. Their parents left both halves of the inheritance to identical restrictive trusts in an effort to protect the irresponsible one. The result was that the responsible sibling felt punished for their sibling’s irresponsibleness.

These are all heart-wrenching, real-life examples reminding us there are no perfect answers. As an advisor stressed to me, an estate plan should not be set in stone, as adjustments may be necessary as life unfolds. Estate planning is an art, not a science. Estate planning advisors have a unique perspective and can offer valuable guidance in helping parents address these thorny issues.

In next week’s post, I’ll share some of the valuable insights I received on this topic from life insurance, financial, life coach, and trust advisors. Stay tuned.

Marvin E. Blum

Two of Marvin Blum’s five grandkids, sweet siblings Lucy Blum (age 3) and Grey Blum (age 1). The Blum family mission is to keep this loving sibling connection going strong throughout their lives and keep pouring down the love to future generations.

Title: Sibling Warfare: Reader Reactions Read More »

Leaving Unequal Inheritances to Your Kids: Fair or Poison?

My post 3 weeks ago on “sibling warfare” generated a hot reaction and a request for me to dive deeper into that topic. I’ll start that today by addressing a controversial topic that often leads to sibling warfare: leaving unequal inheritances to your kids. This topic was the subject of a February 19, 2021 New York Times article by Susan B. Garland titled “The Unequal Inheritance: It Can Work, or It Can ‘Destroy Relationships.’” I have confronted this issue many times in my 44 years as an estate planning lawyer, as clients struggle with the question of “equal vs. fair.” Do I leave my estate equally to my kids, or do a do an unequal division because that would be more fair?

In considering the pros and cons, be aware that this is a bombastic decision. True, equal isn’t always “equitable,” but Garland cautions that “unequal inheritances can trigger sibling fighting after a parent dies. Some feuds end up in court.” Perhaps that’s why, in spite of the many reasons to go unequal, most opt to go with equal. A survey of bequest intentions reported that 93% plan to divide their estate equally among their children, regardless of the children’s financial circumstances. (Source: “Love and Legacy: Are Children’s Affections Related to Parents’ Bequest Intentions?” by Matthew Sommer and HanNa Lim, Journal of Financial Service Professionals, Jan. 2022.)

Even with the overwhelming majority opting for equal inheritances, many parents still wrestle with this decision. Here are 10 reasons parents may leave assets unequally.

  1. One child may be struggling financially, while others are well-off.
  2. One child provided care to an elderly or ailing parent.
  3. One child has kids and the other doesn’t.
  4. One child has a disability.
  5. One child is responsible financially and the other is a spendthrift.
  6. The parents paid for one child’s expensive education or gave them a house.
  7. The parents bailed out a financially irresponsible child over the years.
  8. It’s a blended family where the relationship with stepchildren vs. biological children isn’t equally strong.
  9. Parents leave kids different types of assets, such as a brokerage account to one (that increases in value) and a house to another (that declines).
  10. You love your grandchildren equally and set aside a portion of the estate to go per capita to grandkids, even if one child has 2 kids and the other has 4.

In the final analysis, if you’re going to leave assets unequally, family counselors urge making an effort to get buy-in from all the kids. Garland quotes Arline Kardasis of Elder Decisions: “To head off sibling strife, parents should explain their decision to each child individually or as a group, or even seek mediation.” As do many others, I’m always eager for a dose of wisdom from Warren Buffett and his Vice Chairman Charlie Munger. My family and I attend the Berkshire-Hathaway annual meeting each year, and when I asked Buffett and Munger to share their views on inheritances, Buffett concurred with the notion of going for buy-in: “There may be circumstances where one child has much more of an interest in one type of an asset or another, and you want to make sure your definition of equality in terms of handling different kinds of assets meshes or at least is understood by the children so they don’t think that you gave a farm or a house or something of that sort that resulted in inequality when you thought it was equality.” On the other hand, Buffett’s 98-year-old sidekick Munger was more circumspect. Sharing the concern of many who steer away from unequal inheritance, Munger (a man known for his directness and brevity) said simply: “If you’re going to treat them unequally, that is poison.” (Click on this link for an article sharing my reactions to the 2022 Berkshire-Hathaway Annual Meeting.

Garland sums up the risk: “No matter what the parents’ reasoning may be for leaving unequal bequests, experts advise that they understand how such a decision can hurt the people they care about most.” She quotes Harry Margolis, an estate lawyer in Boston: “Inheritances are often seen as a proxy for love. It’s hard to give unequal amounts and not have a child feel that Mom loved me less or more. Even an investment banker who doesn’t need the money has feelings.” Bottom line: If you’re going down the unequal path, proceed with caution. You may be laying the groundwork for sibling warfare.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s son Adam with Charlie Munger, Vice Chairman of Berkshire-Hathaway. In response to Marvin’s question, Munger cautions that unequal inheritances are “poison.” Proceed with caution in order to build a lasting family legacy.

Leaving Unequal Inheritances to Your Kids: Fair or Poison? Read More »

MCA Is a Cause That Makes My Heart Sing. What’s Yours?

Our recent Family Legacy Planning posts have stressed the importance of relationships and social interaction in improving the quality and quantity of our lives. Developing that theme further, I think of the various communities we belong to and how those interactions benefit us. We all belong to a number of communities: family, friends, work, church/synagogue, clubs, civic groups, etc. Today, I want to focus on the many benefits of civic engagement. One benefit is that it provides us a community, as we build relationships with an organization’s volunteers and staff. That, in and of itself, is enriching. But civic involvement provides us with so much more.

I’ve emphasized before how author Jay Hughes teaches that wealth comes in multiple forms—Financial Capital being just one of five. The other four are Human Capital, Intellectual Capital, Social Capital, and Spiritual Capital. Civic engagement runs across all of these capitals, but in particular Social Capital is where we give our time, talent, and treasure to society, building relationships in the communities where we live, while also providing the family with a life of meaning. Author Chaim Potok challenges us in The Chosen to live a life with meaning: “It is hard work to live a life with meaning.” Civic involvement provides a pathway to live such a life.

Over the years, I’m grateful for the numerous causes where I’ve had the opportunity to serve. Most have to do with the arts and education, especially those providing opportunities for young people to thrive. Chief among these have been Trinity Valley School, Fort Worth Symphony, Texas Cultural Trust, B-Sharp Youth Music Program, along with my school and religious affiliations. But one that is really grabbing my heart, and the focus of today’s post, is The Multicultural Alliance (“MCA,” formerly the National Council of Christians and Jews, “NCCJ”). This organization started in Fort Worth in 1951, and I’ve been actively involved for over 30 years. I’m now in my third stint of serving as MCA’s Presiding Chair. Over these 70+ years, the mission has stayed the same: to fight bias, bigotry, and hate while working to build inclusive communities. It’s important work, but never has it been as important as it is now. Today, more than ever, we need MCA to break down barriers that separate us and bring people together.

We are living in turbulent times. The rise in hate crimes is beyond tragic. Earlier this year, our own community experienced the horror of a terrorist taking members of Colleyville’s Beth Israel Synagogue hostage. The hostages were saved by the heroic bravery of Rabbi Charlie Cytron-Walker. Rabbi Charlie’s wife Adena served as MCA’s Vice President of Programming for the last 15 years. So this terrorist act hit home. Rabbi Charlie is a member of our close-knit MCA family.

Under the superb leadership of our President Dr. Cheryl Kimberling, MCA sponsors numerous programs to educate us, opening hearts and minds. One of our signature programs is Camp CommUNITY (formerly Camp Anytown), where high school students from diverse backgrounds undergo a transformative experience over five days. Campers return home with a newfound acceptance of others, no longer seeing differences as something to fear, but rather as something to embrace. Given that our world has become more divided than ever, now is MCA’s time. MCA builds bridges of understanding to bring us back together. My daughter Lizzy was a camper and later a counselor, and I served as an adult advisor, and the experience was life changing for both of us.

(In 2016, I was honored and humbled to receive MCA’s Annual Award at that year’s MCA Awards Dinner. To learn more about my passion for MCA, click here to read my acceptance speech.)

I share all of this to encourage others to find a cause that (in the words of Lady Bird Johnson) “makes your heart sing.” MCA does that for me. Furthermore, MCA operates on a very limited budget, so every donation truly moves the needle. In selecting a cause to support, it adds to the satisfaction if you know you’re doing something that directly impacts and advances an important mission.

As I advocate for Family Legacy Planning, I cannot overstress the benefits of civic engagement. The Blum Firm specializes in helping families incorporate into the estate plan a charitable structure that’s right for you. Philanthropy (whether it be your time, your talent, your treasure, or all three) is a laboratory for building a legacy. A family coming together to support meaningful causes creates powerful family glue. It brings generations together, fostering family communication and trust. Siblings and cousins develop group decision-making skills. Philanthropy strengthens the family’s Social Capital and builds deeper connections among family members. Not everyone in a family can work in a family business, but everyone can play a role in family philanthropy. Civic activity not only benefits the community, but the family who does it gets back considerably more than it gives. It’s truly a “win-win.”

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum, Presiding Chair of The Multicultural Alliance, at this year’s MCA Awards Dinner, promoting the MCA mission to fight hate and build inclusive communities.

MCA Is a Cause That Makes My Heart Sing. What’s Yours? Read More »

Procrastinating Planning? Heed this Warning from “Ray Ray”

For those of us who are putting off something until “tomorrow,” I recently had a wake-up call to remind us that time is zooming by faster than we realize. The wake-up jolt happened as my daughter’s family was packing for their move from Dallas back to New York. The story centers around my oldest grandchild Stella (age 9) and her little baby doll (or “lovey”) that she named “Ray Ray.” (Warning: You may want to have a Kleenex handy.)

Like most little kids, Stella became attached to Ray Ray as an infant. It’s common for kids to cling to a comfort object like a blankie, stuffed animal, or other soft object. It provides them security, especially at bedtime or when adjusting to a new situation. Stella took Ray Ray everywhere, and cared for her as if she were her own little baby. We all understood how much Ray Ray meant to Stella. Once when Stella dropped Ray Ray from her stroller on an evening walk, I retraced our steps with a flashlight and found Ray Ray on the street, thankfully before a car ran over her. Another time, when movers were packing Stella’s family for a move from New York to Dallas three years ago, they accidentally packed Ray Ray in a box. It was weeks before Stella and Ray Ray were reunited, and it was quite a heartwarming reunion to witness. I knew the day would come when Stella would move on from Ray Ray, but I wasn’t prepared for how it would affect me. That day came a couple of weeks ago, and I’m still fighting back tears.

Packing for this move, we were determined to avoid the mistake of Ray Ray winding up again in a moving box. When we gathered Ray Ray and other items to keep separate, Stella announced this gut-punch: “I don’t need Ray Ray anymore. I don’t care if you bring her with us.” All of a sudden, I felt the swift passage of time. I didn’t feel any older, but in a flash, Stella was no longer a little girl. It called to mind lyrics from Babes in Toyland that always gets to me: “Toyland, toyland, little girl and boy land…. Once you pass its borders, you can ne’er return again.” Time marches on; it doesn’t wait till we’re ready.

Here’s my takeaway: For all those things we’re putting off till the future (whether something we need to do or a joy we’re postponing), the future is now. Time flies, and as we get older, it speeds up even more. As Chaim Potok alerted us in The Chosen, in the big scheme of things, a lifetime is no more than “the blink of an eye.” The key is to fill that blink with meaning. My wife Laurie’s grandfather Albert Herzberg said to do that, you have to be intentional. He lived by a “three a day” motto: Before his head hit the pillow at night, he required himself to do three “good turns” each day. Laurie’s mother Aimee Kriger lived by that motto too. It’s hard to do, but it certainly adds up to a life filled with meaning.

Is there something you’re putting off? Estate Planning? Red File? Legacy Letter? Business Succession Planning? Family Meeting? Stella reminds us that time is sweeping by faster than we think.

I can hear Tevye & Golde in “Fiddler on the Roof,” singing at their daughter’s wedding:

“Is this the little girl I carried?
Is this the little boy at play?
I don’t remember growing older,
When did they?…

Sunrise, sunset. Sunrise, sunset,
Swiftly fly the years.
One season following another,
Laden with happiness and tears.”

Now where’s that Kleenex?

Marvin E. Blum

Left photo: Marvin Blum’s granddaughter Stella clinging to her lovey “Ray Ray” three years ago, rescued from a moving box after weeks of separation: “Reunited and it feels so good!” Center photo: Ray Ray, thankfully still “alive” after a long journey from New York to Dallas. Right photo: Stella Savetsky today (age 9), growing up faster than her grandfather Marvin Blum can handle.

Procrastinating Planning? Heed this Warning from “Ray Ray” Read More »

Sibling Warfare: Let’s Battle This Epidemic

It seems every day the media is reporting on another family falling off the rails. One sibling is suing another. A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about Rabbi Danziger’s words when Laurie and I were exchanging wedding vows, and that message applies here. When conflict erupts, step back and remember that we don’t all see things the same way. Try to respect the viewpoints of others, listen more, and be thankful for the variety of spices in the Havdalah spice box. The world is sweeter because it’s a blend of different spices. But look, I’m not naïve. Rabbi Danziger’s words worked for Laurie and me. But when siblings are on the brink of war, it takes more than a spice box to resolve it. Let’s explore that.

Every family struggles with conflict. Sibling rivalry is the norm. Our own two kids come from the same gene pool and had the same upbringing, but in so many ways they’re as different as day and night. Probably every parent can relate. When they were little, Adam and Lizzy were always sparring. Laurie and I couldn’t do anything to stop it. I felt better when our wise family friend Jack Belz told us to just embrace it: “They’re developing valuable negotiation skills that will serve them well in life.” Laurie’s sister Diane Wilen, Ph.D. psychologist, comforted us too: “That behavior is developmentally appropriate.”

Yet when kids get older and the fighting gets to epic proportions, that’s another story. The typical response is to try to sweep it under the rug. It’s risky to open that can of worms. Maybe if we ignore it, it’ll go away. News flash: The conflict doesn’t go away. It festers. Eventually, if not addressed, the volcano erupts. Vesuvius often explodes after Generation One (especially the matriarch) is gone. Consider what happened in these five cases that all received widespread media attention.

  1. Barclay: British billionaire twins Frederick and David Barclay owned the Ritz Hotel near Buckingham Palace. Frederick and his daughter Amanda were having private conversations to explore the sale of the hotel, but video footage caught David’s son installing a bug in Frederick’s chair. Brother David’s family captured 1,000 separate conversations Frederick had with prospective buyers, lawyers, bankers, and trustees. Frederick sued David’s family for this “commercial espionage on a vast scale,” alleging that David’s sons were trying to freeze out their cousin Amanda. “The Barclays need to remember that 60% of family business failure is because of a lack of open communication and trust. Without rebuilding this, all their businesses, a large part of the family wealth, and the family bonds themselves, will be gone.
  2. Feil: New York real estate mogul Louis Feil left his $7 billion dynasty to his four children (one son Jeffrey and three daughters) in equal shares. Jeffrey ran the business and received a sizable salary, but distributed just $300,000 per year to his sisters. The three sisters sued, alleging that Jeffrey was starving them out so he could buy them out at a discounted price. The family lost its glue when the parents died. According to Jeffrey, when his father died, “the binding of the book came loose,” and when mother Gertrude later died, “the pages fell out.” A better succession plan would have provided a substantial cash flow for all four business owners.
  3. Angelos: Louis Angelos filed suit against his brother John, alleging John manipulated the family to take control of Baltimore Orioles baseball team and the rest of the family fortune. “Louis Angelos’ lawsuit depicts his brother as manipulating, misleading and intimidating their mother to gain more power over the family fortune. In one instance, when Louis Angelos asks her why she puts up with John’s abuse. She allegedly replied, ‘He’ll go ballistic.’ ” Those are some ugly family dynamics.
  4. Spanos: After the death of their parents, two of the four Spanos children were named as co-trustees of a family trust owning a substantial part of the Los Angeles Chargers football team. Sister Dea filed suit seeking removal of brother Dean as a co-trustee. Dea contends that Dean’s decision to move the Chargers to Los Angeles from San Diego was financially ruinous. She also alleges Dean breached fiduciary duties by diverting $105 million of trust funds to various debts, and borrowing $60 million “for the wasteful purchase of an airplane for Dean’s and Michael’s use that has no legitimate business justification.” Siblings Michael and Alexis are siding with brother Dean, “united in support of our parents’ and grandparents’ wishes.” A key takeaway: When creating trusts, select fiduciaries very carefully, and be especially cautious not to pit siblings against each other as co-trustees.
  5. Briscoe: Former Texas Governor Dolph Briscoe’s goal was to keep his 600,000 acre ranch in the family long after his death, to be shared equally by his three children. Oldest daughter Janey died in 2018 leaving no heirs, and now the surviving siblings Cele and Chip are fighting in Uvalde County court over how to divide up Janey’s portion of the family fortune. Cele and her kids accuse Chip “of manipulating his frail older sister into signing documents that disinherited them from her estate, tilting control of the Briscoe ranching fortune to him and his two sons in contravention of their grandfather’s wishes.” Chip contends that Cele “drifted away from the family business after moving to Dallas and marrying into a dynasty with a fortune of its own” and is “using the litigation to force a breakup of the family holdings.” Governor Briscoe must be rolling over in his grave. It’s unfortunate he didn’t structure his estate plan to leave his estate to a dynasty trust, instead of relying on the hope that heirs would abide by his wishes to keep the ranch intact.

These are but five examples; there are countless more. The mistakes made in each of the five above cases provide some guidance on what not to do. Create a thoughtful trust structure that reflects the family’s mission and values. Select fiduciaries carefully and avoid pitting siblings against each other. Hold family meetings with exercises to improve communication and trust. Ideally, conduct such activities while Generation One is still around to provide influence and family glue. Consultant Matthew Wesley asks heirs to make a “moral commitment” that they’ll never sue each other. Seek a more collaborative and private resolution. Similarly, author Mitzi Purdue’s family indoctrinates heirs early on that “quarrels stay in the family”–don’t air your dirty laundry in the courtroom. Don’t try to go it alone. There are excellent consultants who can help your family. Laurie and I have engaged them to great success in our own family.

I don’t claim to have all the answers, but this I do know. Don’t ignore the problem of sibling strife. It will come back to haunt your family.

Marvin E. Blum

Sources

  1. Barclay: Ellen Milligan, “Bugging the Ritz, Private Investigators and Billionaires at War,” Bloomberg (www.Bloomberg.com), May 20, 2020.
  2. Feil: Sarah Rose and Peter Grant, “Real Estate Family Wars With Itself: Feil Siblings Grapple with Empire Created by Their Father,” The Wall Street Journal, September 2, 2013.
  3. Angelos: Jeff Barker and Jean Marbella, “Five Angelos Family and Orioles Secrets Brought to Light in Brother’s Lawsuit,” The Baltimore Sun, June 10, 2022.
  4. Spanos: Adam Schefter and Kimberley Martin, “Dean Spanos Sued by Sister, Accused of ‘Misogynistic’ Behavior as Legal Battle Continues Over Control of Los Angeles Chargers,” ESPN (www.ESPN.com), June 10, 2022.
  5. Briscoe: Laura Kusisto and Anne Tergesen, “Squabbling Heirs Rock Former Texas Governor’s Ranching Empire,” The Wall Street Journal, January 14, 2022.

Marvin Blum’s kids at play 32 years ago. Adam putting a headlock on Lizzy was playful back then, but be on guard to make sure little sibling quarrels don’t turn into grownup sibling wars.

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You Want to Stay in Your Home Forever? Consider Elsie Blum’s Alternative

In last week’s Family Legacy Planning post, I presented the case that social interaction improves both the quality and quantity of life. I ended by saying this week’s post would tell my own mother’s story. This email describes the journey of Elsie Blum increasing her social interaction at age 90, and the positive impact on both her and on the rest of the family.

Here is the dilemma many adult children in my shoes face: an elderly parent is living alone in their own home and fiercely wants to stay there. However, their quality of life is declining. They may need health care. The house requires constant maintenance and repair. They are alone and often lonely. Such is the Elsie Blum saga, a story with lots of trials and tribulations, but fortunately a very happy ending. I share this story with the hope it may help others in a similar situation.

After my father died in 2003, my mom began hanging out with some new girlfriends and poured herself into daily volunteering at our synagogue. She was healthy, busy, independent and life was good. Then, 3 years ago, she fell and broke her pelvis. The one-year recovery process was excruciating. She insisted on returning from the rehab facility to her multi-level home where we installed chairlifts on the stairs and lots of handicap bars. We hired round-the-clock care, which was a very unsatisfying solution. No one was happy. But she recovered and regained her independence. Then, a year ago, she fell in her kitchen and broke her hip. Same song, second verse. Once again, she wanted to return from the rehab facility to her home. This time, we were determined to find a different solution.

I struggled with telling her what she didn’t want to hear. Then, the words of my sister-in-law Lea Ann (wife of my deceased brother Irwin) made all the difference. She said, “If Irwin were here, he’d just make arrangements for Elsie to move to a community living environment, and it’d be done!” Irwin was a “can do—get it done” kind of guy. We were both deeply devoted to my mom, but my style was different—I wanted to go all lengths to try to please my mother. My wife Laurie instantly agreed with Lea Ann, and when my mom told us to find full-time care so she could go home, Laurie told her, “We’re not going to do that. We tried that before, and it didn’t work.” Elsie objected, but instantly replied: “Well, if I’m not going to live at home, then I’m going to live at The Stayton.”

We had been trying for years to get my mom to move to The Stayton, a luxury high-rise independent living environment with great food and activities. She had refused to even go look at it. In her mind, it was a “nursing home.” It’s SO not a nursing home. It’s more like walking into a Ritz Carlton Hotel. When she opened the door to the idea of moving there, we jumped on it instantly. The very next morning, we arranged for Laurie, Lea Ann, and me to tour The Stayton, meeting my mother’s decorator Brad Alford there to help us select a residence. As we were leaving her rehab room, she cautioned me not to commit to anything. Hearing Lea Ann’s words in my head, I answered: “This is Irwin Blum talking now. If we find the right place, we’re going to lock it in. I don’t want to take the risk of losing it.” We went to Stayton, and all the while there, I was channeling my brother Irwin.

We found the perfect apartment. Brad Alford decorated it to become a showplace, truly breathtakingly beautiful. The first couple of days were rocky, as Elsie was not a happy camper. That all changed by day 3, when she began meeting the other residents. She marveled at how friendly everyone there was. That was about one year ago. Since that day, my mom has never dined alone. Every day is filled with meaningful activities—programs, concerts, lectures, even Stayton business meetings (which she especially loves, given her head for business). She’s part of a loving and close-knit community. Her face looks younger and relaxed. No more home maintenance. No more loneliness. I mean it when I say she actually seems happier than I’ve ever seen her in my whole life. She has peace of mind, and so do we.

My mom lives in the independent living section, but if ever needed there’s assisted living, skilled nursing, rehabilitation, and also memory care. Thankfully, at 91, she’s going strong and has no need at this time for those other areas. (Please G-d, I hope I have those genes—there’s at least a 50% chance!) I’m convinced The Stayton is adding years to her life, and not just more years, but quality years. I suspect Elsie would say she wished she’d moved to The Stayton ten years ago. We can’t wind the clock back. But as family therapist Brad Nowlin (whose mom Sallie and her husband Joe also live at The Stayton) wisely posited: “When’s the best time to plant a tree? Twenty years ago. When’s the next best time? Now.” We just planted a tree.

The moral to this story: Although many elderly desperately cling to the idea of staying in their own home for the rest of their life, there’s very likely a better solution. They just don’t know it. Elsie would be happy to talk to them.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s mother Elsie Blum with granddaughter Elizabeth Savetsky, living her best life at age 91 at The Stayton.

You Want to Stay in Your Home Forever? Consider Elsie Blum’s Alternative Read More »

Ten Keys to a Long (and Good) Life

In today’s post, I continue exploring the first part of the Blum Family Mission Statement: “It’s all about relationships.” In my research on the value of relationships, I discovered a powerful connection between relationships and longevity. It comes as no shock that interpersonal connections improve both the quantity and quality of life, but what does shock me is how high social interaction falls on the list of top reasons for longevity.

By and large, The Blum Firm’s client base beats the life expectancy lottery. We want to help our clients enjoy a positive senior experience. Legacy planning is not just about improving the quality of life for your heirs, but also about enriching your own life experience. To that end, we engage actively in aspects of “Elder Law,” a label that didn’t exist when I started my law practice. With our Red File checklist, we encourage clients to provide instructions on their care in case of incapacity—not just where they want to live or who will be the caregivers, but also favorite foods, TV shows, colors, etc. We promote planning to avoid guardianship, encouraging the use of financial and medical powers of attorney. We also provide expertise to help protect clients from the tragic epidemic of elder financial abuse, whether from con artists, caregivers, and even family members who prey on the elderly. Our mission is to help clients improve not only the length of their days, but also the quality of those days.

There are certain factors that contribute to long life that are beyond your control, such as genetics. But there are many actions that are within your control. Julianne Holt-Lunstad is a researcher at Brigham Young University who studied tens of thousands of middle-aged people. She examined their lifestyle: their diet, their exercise, their medical status, how often they went to the doctor, whether they smoked or drank, etc. After seven years, she and her colleagues reported their findings. Psychologist Susan Pinker also reports on such research in her 2017 Ted Talk entitled “The Secret to Living Longer May Be Your Social Life.” Here, in descending order of importance, are the top ten contributors to living longer:

10. Clean air
9. Hypertension medication
8. Staying lean
7. Exercise
6. Cardiac rehab
5. Flu vaccine
4. Quit drinking
3. Quit Smoking
2. Close relationships
1. Social integration.

According to Pinker, “face-to-face contact releases neurotransmitters that foster trust, reduce stress, kill pain, and induce pleasure.” She distinguishes between in-person and digital interaction, as the greater benefit comes from interacting in person with people as you move through your day. Social integration doesn’t have to be a close friend. It can be the conversation with a mailman. For years, my wife Laurie delivered Meals on Wheels and had meaningful visits with her “clients” as she brought meals into their homes. She was told countless times from both her clients and their family members what a difference that visit made in the day.

Bottom line: Close personal relationships and face-to-face interactions are the top two keys to living both a long and a good life. In next week’s post, I will apply this proposition to my own mother’s situation. Watch for how Elsie Blum, at age 90, improved her life by moving to a wonderful senior living community at The Stayton in Fort Worth.

Marvin E. Blum

Elsie Blum (left) with son Marvin Blum and daughter-in-law Laurie Blum, improving both the quantity and quality of Elsie’s life through social interaction.

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It’s All About Relationships: My Best Friend, Talmage Boston

A few weeks ago, I dedicated a post to the first prong of the Blum Family Mission Statement: “It’s All About Relationships.” I dedicated the post to my fellow Canoe Brothers, a brotherhood rooted in our shared UT law school experience. Today, I want to single out one of such Canoe Brothers, my best friend Talmage Boston. Our connection was forged by sharing a law school experience and all the times together thereafter. This weekend, Talmage is being honored in Houston by the Texas Bar Foundation, receiving the coveted Dan Rugeley Price Memorial Award for his leadership in the legal profession and his writing talents. The Canoe Brothers will be there to cheer for Brother Talmage, who has been a role model to many, but especially to me. My friendship with Talmage has enriched my life immeasurably.

I first met Talmage at our college dorm Dobie Center on The University of Texas campus. We had a lot in common: each of us a dedicated student, solidly committed to family, faith, and friends. Yet in other ways, Talmage was light years ahead of me—outgoing, confident, athletic. Those were the days of the Vietnam war and Watergate, and Talmage was politically outspoken as Chair of the Texas Union Ideas & Issues Committee. He even ran for UT Student Body President and almost won (beat out by the first female to serve in that role). In my view, Talmage was the proverbial “Big Man on Campus.”

In our senior year, Talmage approached me with the idea of becoming roommates the following year at UT Law School. I was honored and flattered. I deliberated a bit, as I’d never had a roommate (other than my brother Irwin), and there was also the subject of religion. All of my Jewish friends lived with other Jewish people. It was natural for young Jews to stick together, as the Jewish connection is powerful both religiously and culturally. My close friend Karen Cortell (now Reisman) even raised the question: “Marvin, what about the fact Talmage isn’t Jewish?” I knew Talmage had many Jewish friends and respected people of all backgrounds. I decided to take the risk.

(Of course, there was the time I brought my week of kosher food for Passover, along with a kosher skillet to warm it in, and came home to discover pork chops being fried in it. Let’s describe that as a “teachable moment.” I cherish the memory.)

Talmage opened me up to a world outside the classroom. My social life soared, even joining with Talmage to throw some pretty spirited parties (the themes of two of them—“Africa” and “Mexico”—conjure up some crazy memories). Talmage looped me into his friendships with campus leaders and later with national political, literary, and sports heros, such as the late, great Bobby Brown. Talmage taught me to have the courage to seek anything you want. (“The worst they can say is ‘no’.”) He even gave me the determination to go after Laurie, the girl of my dreams, and joined me on a trip to London to “run into” Laurie and her family and convince her to marry me. (It worked!) That’s true friendship.

Through continued shared experiences, my 50-year friendship with Talmage just keeps growing. Talmage encourages me to continually grow and reinvent myself. In that regard, Talmage as an accomplished speaker and author of several books is a true role model. He champions my painting and my writing, urging me to write a book on Family Legacy Planning. (Maybe someday?)

I’m still Marvin and he’s still Talmage, but we’ve been a great influence on each other in ways both profound and whimsical. He even has me joining him to sing my heart out at outdoor concerts. Talmage is good. I’m not, but he taught me “who cares?” One such night in song was at a concert of Eagles songs, and the title of their hit “Take It to the Limit” fits Talmage to a T! All of us who know and love Talmage would agree he lives life by “taking it to the limit.”

I urge everyone to find a friend who stretches you and completes you, the way Talmage fills in the gaps for me. Talmage recently sent the Canoe Brothers a quote of Ralph Waldo Emerson from FDR’s January 1945 inaugural address: “The only way to have a friend is to be one.” The search for friendship requires each of us to make an investment. The more we invest, the greater the ROI (return on investment). Invest in a relationship with someone who brings out your best and challenges you to grow.

I’ll close with the two ending stanzas in Henry David Thoreau’s poem “Friendship,” which so aptly depicts the intertwined roots of my friendship with Talmage.

Two sturdy oaks I mean, which side by side,
Withstand the winter’s storm,
And spite of wind and tide,
Grow up the meadow’s pride,
For both are strong

Above they barely touch, but undermined
Down to their deepest source,
Admiring you shall find
Their roots are intertwined
Insep’rably.

Marvin E. Blum

Left photo: Talmage Boston and Marvin Blum (right) on Europe trip in 1978—growing a beard was Talmage’s idea, always stretching Marvin out of his comfort zone. Right photo: Marvin Blum (left) and Talmage Boston donating the “Blum & Boston Scholarship” at UT Law School in honor of a lifelong friendship that started during their law school years.

It’s All About Relationships: My Best Friend, Talmage Boston Read More »

Family Friction? Be Thankful for the Variety of Spices

Last week’s post focused on the polarization in government and the impact on tax law. Each side stakes out its position and tries to force its views on the other side. Even when there’s plenty of common ground, no consensus emerges. Witness this week’s renewed debate over gun legislation. There is no spirit of compromise—it’s all or nothing. If you can force together 51 Senate votes, it’s “all.” If you can’t, it’s “nothing.” This dysfunction isn’t limited to government. Such partisanship behavior also spills over into families.

I wrote recently that 2022 is the “Year of the Wedding” after so many COVID wedding postponements. Marriage creates a perfect storm for polarization. I know firsthand. Laurie and I are a match made in heaven, but even we had our share of tension 43 years ago as we joined together in holy matrimony.

Laurie and I each came from spiritual homes with a strong Jewish identity, but different practices and traditions. Our situation is certainly not unique. The tendency is to cling to how your family did it as the “right” way—the perfect recipe for “I’m right” and “You’re wrong” behavior. I shared this struggle with Rabbi Harry Danziger who officiated at our wedding. While we were standing under the chuppah exchanging vows, Rabbi Danziger provided an eloquent solution.

Our wedding was on a Saturday night after the ceremony of “Havdalah” marking the “separation” between Shabbat and a return to the ordinary work week. The sabbath endows us with a higher soul, symbolized in the Havdalah service by savoring the fragrance of a mixture of spices in a spice box. In a subtle reference to our different viewpoints, Rabbi Danziger urged us to celebrate those differences by recalling the Hebrew spice box prayer: “We thank G-d for the variety of spices.” The world is a sweeter place because we each bring to it our own spices: our own experiences, beliefs, traditions, and customs. I began to see our differences as a spice box that could blend into a sweeter aroma. Indeed, that’s the home Laurie and I created, where we blended our upbringings in a way that created a spiritual Jewish home that’s right for us.

In his article in The Atlantic “A Gentler, Better Way to Change Minds,” Arthur Brooks offers these tips on building consensus:

  • View those who disagree with you as valued voices, worthy of respect and attention. Go out of your way to welcome them into your circle.
  • Don’t take rejection personally. You can love someone with whom you disagree.
  • Listen more. When it comes to changing someone’s mind, listening is more powerful than talking.
  • Cultivate openness, non-discrimination, and non-attachment to views in order to transform others. For your values to truly be a gift to others, you must first weaken (though not abandon) your own belief attachments.

I’ll add one more tip to this list. Ancient Greek Stoics saw conflicting viewpoints in a positive light. The Daily Stoic Life teaches the value of being part of a Scipionic Circle, surrounding ourselves with peers who see things differently and stretch our minds. “If you’re not exposing yourself to new ideas, how will you get better?… If you’re not being challenged, how can you become wise?” Adopt a new perspective on conflict. Don’t dodge it, embrace it. Families who look at conflicting beliefs through this lens can build mutual respect, find common ground, reach consensus, and emerge with a sweeter spice box of honored viewpoints.

Marvin E. Blum

Wedding of Marvin and Laurie Blum (1979) celebrating the blending of spices.

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Tax Planning in the Age of Dysfunctional Government

I have a great love for teaching. It brings me joy to share my knowledge of estate planning and help families achieve multi-generational success. One such opportunity was last week, when I spoke in Tyler at the Texas Society of CPAs East Texas Expo.

At the start of my speech, it occurred to me that my last speech in Tyler was in November 2016, the morning after election day. I woke up that morning to the news that Donald Trump defeated Hillary Clinton. As I drove to Tyler, I was processing the impact of that outcome on tax planning. My whole speech changed.

Regardless of your political views, it’s indisputable that Trump’s election ushered in an era of polarization and partisanship. Early in the Trump presidency, the 2017 Tax Cuts and Jobs Act became law, passing without one Democrat vote. We entered a world where bipartisan support of legislation became more and more rare.

We are now in an age where the pendulum swings far right, then far left, back and forth, continuously over-correcting. Gone are the days when the pendulum hovered in the moderate zone near the middle of the curve. The problem is exacerbated by the primary system for selecting nominees, an electoral process that tends to favor extreme left and extreme right candidates.

In this age of extremism, tax law has become a ping pong ball. Each side uses tax law to advance its agenda. The result is an ever-changing tax landscape. We never know what’s coming.

But, we do know what the tax law is today. As tax law changes, Congress almost always grandfathers planning completed before the new law passes. My message in Tyler was this: take advantage of planning opportunities we have today while we’re still in the “Golden Age of Estate Planning.” To review my planning recommendations, click here for my presentation Last Chance Tax Planning: The Golden Age of Estate Planning Won’t Last Forever (If You’re Not Doing Estate Planning Now, What Are You Waiting For?).

In next week’s Family Legacy Planning email post, I’ll address how the dysfunction that’s happening in government is also happening in families. In my mission to help families heal and prosper, I’ll offer some insights and tips on building consensus.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum speaking on “Last Chance Tax Planning” at the TXCPA East Texas Expo in Tyler.

Tax Planning in the Age of Dysfunctional Government Read More »

A Favorite Annual Experience in Our Family

In last week’s Family Legacy Planning post, I shared that the first prong in the Blum Family Mission Statement is Relationships. It takes work to build solid relationships. They don’t come together unless each party invests 3 T’s: Time, Transparency, Truth, all of which leads to the critical fourth T: Trust.

I quoted Malcolm Gladwell for the proposition that relationships and shared values grow out of shared experiences. To repeat Gladwell’s wisdom: “You can’t share values with others until you share meaningful experiences with them…; the relationship, trust and friendship has been shared through the experiences first.” Therefore, for families and friends to build trusting relationships, they must share meaningful experiences. I urge all families to create traditions for heirs to spend meaningful time together, keeping the family connected long after the matriarch and patriarch are gone.

I also encourage families to endow those experiences in the estate plan, so the funds will be there to cover the cost. In past posts, I quoted Mitzi Purdue who credits her ancestors for setting up a trust to cover the cost of family reunions (every 12 months on the Sheraton side of the family with more lavish trips, and every 18 months on the Purdue side of the family with more modest trips). Purdue asserts that those trips are the single biggest reason both sides of her family have remained connected over the years, as well as the single biggest reason their family business continues to thrive.

In thinking about the close connectedness of my wife Laurie’s family, I realize those strong relationships are no accident. Four Kriger sisters grew up in Memphis but now live in various states, and the next generation has spread out across the country even more. However, the Kriger family is intentional about regular family gatherings. These gatherings are a tribute to their deceased parents, who made it clear that family closeness was a top priority. One of those traditions is an annual family trip to Omaha to attend the Berkshire-Hathaway annual meeting. It’s an important ritual that has been continuing for over a decade.

After a two-year break due to COVID, it was good to be in Omaha again for this year’s annual meeting. People are always curious about our takeaways from Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger, who entertain the crowd of some 30,000 Berkshire groupies with their wit and wisdom, answering questions all day with only a one-hour lunch break. Buffett (age 91) and Munger (age 98) are an inspiration. At their advanced ages, there is no sign of mental slippage. They are role models for us to always keep our brains active and never quit learning.

Two times in the past, I was fortunate to be selected to ask questions, and that was a special highlight. The first question was for Buffett to discuss his estate plan and to elaborate on his famous line: “I want to leave my children enough so they can do anything, but not so much that they can do nothing.” Click here for Buffett’s answer. The second question was to ask Buffett to discuss his philanthropy and how he decided to become a philanthropist. Click here for his answer. I have found that people care what Buffett and Munger say, so at future meetings I’ll try to seek more guidance from them on estate planning topics.

Here are some other takeaways from this year’s meeting:

  • The number one reason for Berkshire’s success is the company’s culture. Create a positive work environment where people feel they are part of a family who cares about them. Hire the best people and set them free to soar. That’s certainly my goal at The Blum Firm.
  • The second half of life offers the best opportunities. Learn from mistakes you made in the first half of life, and that sets you up for success in the second half of life. Don’t beat yourself up over mistakes. Even Warren and Charlie made plenty of mistakes.
  • Be forgiving when your team makes mistakes, as long as it’s not a slip of integrity. Buffett and Munger are unequivocally supportive of their team, as long as the employee behaves with utmost integrity.
  • Don’t panic over stock market declines. See it as an opportunity to pick up bargains. Ride out the waves, and you’ll win over the long run.
  • Maintain a sense of humor. Warren and Charlie made every topic fun and enjoyable, no matter how serious. I believe their sense of humor helps sustain them.

The Kriger family is already making plans for next year’s annual meeting. Here’s hoping Buffett and Munger will still be going strong next year, but given what I just saw, I’d put my money on them.

I urge you to come up with some meaningful experiences your family can share. It’s essential in building and sustaining family connection. As you consider the possibilities, perhaps you’d like to join us next year in Omaha!

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin and Laurie Blum (far left) with family members on an annual outing to the Berkshire-Hathaway Annual Meeting—building relationships by sharing meaningful experiences.

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It’s All About Relationships—Meet the Canoe Brothers

Early on in this Family Legacy Planning series, I stressed the importance of each family creating a Family Mission Statement. The process involves (1) discovering the values that family members hold in common, (2) jointly developing a vision for the kind of family they want to be, and (3) merging those values and vision into a written expression of the family’s guiding principles. As each family member embraces that mission, it helps the family develop a core. Indeed, the mission statement guides the family through decisions and helps keep it on track and unified. Ideally, the family mission guides the whole estate planning process.

The Blum family adopted a three-pronged mission statement:

  1. Relationships
  2. Productive Work
  3. Living a Meaningful & Spiritual Life

For us, it all starts with relationships. I’d like to dive deeper into that first prong of our mission statement. The seed for it was actually planted years ago when Fort Worth community leader Gretchen Denny said to me: “Marvin, it’s all about relationships.” That statement struck me as profound, yet a bit puzzling. I was too young to fully understand where Gretchen was coming from. Why did that beat out everything else we strive for in life? Gretchen, widowed at a young age when her attorney husband Sam Denny died way too early, realized that more than anything else, relationships are what fulfills us and nurtures us. As I’ve gotten older, I now get it. That’s why it earned the position of first place in our mission statement.

Harvard professor and author Arthur Brooks supports my thesis in his article in The Atlantic “10 Practical Ways to Improve Happiness.” In addition to being there to support and nurture us, relationships actually tops the list on how to increase our happiness. An international team of researchers identified 68 ways to raise happiness, then narrowed it to ten and ranked them. Note how Brooks’ description of number one and number two echo my emphasis on relationships:

  1. Invest in family and friends. The research is clear that though our natural impulse may be to buy stuff, we should invest instead in improving our closest relationships by sharing experiences and freeing up time to spend together.
  2. Join a club. The “social capital” you get from voluntarily and regularly associating with other people, whether or not you do so through a formal club, has long been known to foster a sense of belonging and protect against loneliness and isolation.

I am witnessing firsthand how relationships are enriching my life. It started 47 years ago when I entered The University of Texas Law School and bonded with an extraordinary group of classmates. Over the years, those friendships have deepened. Thanks to the efforts of my best friend Talmage Boston (“the connector”), we have not only remained connected, but we continue to grow closer. The reason those friendships have grown into lifelong relationships is because a core group of us share meaningful experiences with each other. Certainly, sharing the law school experience was bonding, but we are even more glued together because of regular activities we do together, especially an annual canoe trip on the Guadalupe River. We call ourselves the “Canoe Brothers.”

On those canoe trips, we open our hearts and minds to hear each other’s life stories. We each bring our own values and opinions. We agree, we disagree, we debate, but we do it all with respect. Through this shared canoe experience, we build trust, and trust is the foundation for a lasting relationship. All of this is possible because we make the time to be together and share experiences. The renowned author Malcolm Gladwell expressed it perfectly: “You can’t share values with others until you share meaningful experiences with them. It is through these meaningful experiences that you come to know what their values are. Those you agree with and those you don’t; but the relationship, trust and friendship has been shared through the experiences first.”

As I urge families to engage in a legacy-building process, I stress the importance of family enrichment activities. Like the bonding that Canoe Brothers share on the Guadalupe, families likewise need intentional, regular experiences together. At The Blum Firm, we encourage clients to weave this priority into the estate plan. The safest way to foster lasting family unity is to set aside funds in a FAST trust dedicated to paying for family meetings, meaningful group travel, and other family enrichment. Endowing family experiences strengthens the ties that bind us. It’s the best inheritance you can leave your heirs.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum (back row, fifth from left) with law school classmates, now the “Canoe Brothers.” The motto on the t-shirts tells the bond of these relationships: “Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell together in unity! Psalms 133:1”

It’s All About Relationships—Meet the Canoe Brothers Read More »

I Do, Round Two: Second Marriage Estate Planning

I was honored to speak recently to the Midland-Odessa Business and Estate Council. I selected a subject that has become a significant part of our estate planning practice—second marriage estate planning.

Why is this such a hot topic? Consider these statistics:

  • 50% of today’s marriages are second (or third or fourth) marriages for at least one of the spouses.
  • 75% of people who divorce marry again.
  • 65% of remarriages involve children from a prior marriage.

Estate planning for the traditional “nuclear” family is less and less the norm. We are living in a world of the “blended family” (or, “modern family” as popularized on TV). More than half of Americans are part of a blended family.

Multiple marriages bring issues that the estate plan needs to address:

  • Onboarding a new spouse (perhaps with kids of his/her own) into a family unit
  • Relationships between children and a stepmother or stepfather
  • Relationships between stepsiblings
  • Age disparity between spouses
  • Wealth disparity between spouses

Such issues create a potentially hot family dynamic. The Blum Firm is committed to helping blended families create thoughtful estate plans, reducing the risk of later friction. We are also committed to helping families navigate these new relationships and foster a family’s human capital.

Here’s another sobering statistic: 60% of remarriages end in divorce. Accordingly, the responsible couple will do prenuptial planning to address the “what if” before saying “I do.”

In my speech, I identified 18 fact situations that could give rise to heartache if not properly addressed in the estate plan. A copy of my presentation on Second Marriage Estate Planning is available here. The Blum Firm is honored to share planning tips to help preserve family harmony in cases of “I Do, Round Two.”

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum speaking to Midland-Odessa Business and Estate Council on “I Do, Round Two: Second Marriage Estate Planning.”

I Do, Round Two: Second Marriage Estate Planning Read More »

Declaration of INTER-dependence

Last week’s email told the story of how my support group (especially my brother Irwin) came to my rescue when the 2000 tornado destroyed The Blum Firm law office. I introduced the concept of INTERDEPENDENCE. Families who are interdependent are there for each other, helping everyone thrive as we go through life’s ups and downs together.

As families become more affluent, there is a tendency toward each person becoming more independent. Dr. James Grubman describes this process in Strangers in Paradise. Grubman refers to new wealth generators as “immigrants to the land of wealth.” As families leave the land of the working class and immigrate up the wealth ladder, they travel away from interdependence, more and more to a land where each person is independent. Our American culture encourages that process. We strive to bring up our children to be independent and self-reliant. We are a country created out of a Declaration of Independence. Yet independence can go too far, even to the point of causing family estrangement. As family governance consultant Tom Rogerson puts it: “Independence is great, except when it fully cannibalizes interdependence.” Yes, we declare our independence, but this country was founded on a Constitution that begins: “We the people,” not “I, the person…”

Lower net worth families have tremendous interdependence. Why? It’s out of necessity. I can relate. Irwin and I grew up in a small house sharing a bedroom, sharing a bathroom, and we all pitched in to work in Blum’s Café. Dinner table conversations were about the family business and making ends meet on a tight budget. On the rare occasions when we bought a new car, my dad took us along to watch him negotiate. Irwin and I went door-to-door collecting coat hangers to sell at the cleaners, two for a penny. (Actually, Irwin sent me out to collect the hangers while he stayed back to “run the business,” but I felt honored as the kid brother to be included in his business venture.) That upbringing provided us a natural family glue. It’s no wonder we were always there for each other, tornado and all. I believe Irwin knows he could count on me too (and not just when “helping” him write all his papers for school). As I’ve shared before, the ultimate example was on Irwin’s deathbed from pancreatic cancer, when he held onto life just long enough to provide blood for a genetics kit, so that I (his only at-risk blood relative) could gather critical genetic information for my own health care. Irwin held onto life, knowing I needed that blood study, and then he died moments after giving blood.

Tom Rogerson uses a graph to illustrate the risks to family cohesion when they move away from interdependence.

The horizontal axis moves from low wealth to extreme wealth. The vertical axis starts with interdependence, then moves up to independence, and further up to an unfortunate state of dependence. The graph shows that as wealth increases, family members become more and more independent. Dinner conversations are more social (“How’s your golf game, Dad?”) and less consequential. Kids have their own bedrooms and go to summer camp, no longer learning how to work with and negotiate with siblings. They lose training on how to make decisions together. They become less and less connected.

The lower left corner fosters entrepreneurialism. That’s the environment that created the juice for most of today’s wealth creators to thrive. Moving toward independence, with each person in his own silo, is detrimental to entrepreneurialism and especially detrimental when kids enter a family business. They love each other, but they don’t KNOW each other deeply. At its worst, it can lead to lives of isolation and substance abuse, hence the arrow leading back up towards dependence.

The graph shows that there is a movement for families of extreme wealth to reconnect, to intentionally work on rebuilding relationships with each other. The goal is to reestablish communication and build trust. The best way to do this is to embark on regular family meetings with team-building exercises and group learning. A third-party consultant should facilitate the meetings. Parents should join as participants and not run the meeting. The estate plan needs to adapt as well, using trusts to encourage family togetherness, enrichment, and mentorship of heirs. The goal is to build self-esteem and empower heirs, rather than create entitled “trust babies” waiting on their monthly distribution, deprived of incentive to get out of bed. Ultimately, the family creates a “familiness” culture where they are woven together in a family fabric, as Irwin and I were there for each other during the tornados of our lives.

I am grateful to Tom Rogerson, Jim Grubman, and other mentors who have awakened me to this new age of estate planning. I am an eager proponent of “qualitative” estate planning to go along with the “quantitative,” or estate planning that is both “heart” and “head.” I want to thank all of you who are encouraging me to share my passion to help families build a legacy and thrive from generation to generation. As commercial real estate broker Bill Zei of Dallas graciously wrote me: “Your writings help me stay mindful of how deeply important it is to stay united with family.” I’m honored to be a champion for that cause. At your urging, I will continue to share the lessons from the “soft” side of estate planning in my evolving journey as a holistic trusts and estates lawyer. The Blum Firm welcomes the opportunity to help you incorporate legacy planning into your estate plan.

Marvin E. Blum

Striving for an INTER-dependent Blum family, where we are all there for each other, including for the two little boys having a hard time. Marvin and Laurie Blum flanked by daughter Lizzy’s family (left) and son Adam’s family (right).

Declaration of INTER-dependence Read More »

When Life Throws You a Tornado

The most recent topic in our Family Legacy Planning series is the importance of resilience. Specifically, I wrote last week of how Laurie and I overcame the heartbreak of a giving birth to a stillborn child by drawing strength from ancestors who’d endured inhumane atrocities yet survived. Reactions to that post were heartfelt and affirming, as many shared how they have likewise overcome rough times. Like me, their resilience was fueled by the strength of their family ties, as well as the support of a loving community of friends. One response particularly grabbed me. Here’s what my San Francisco colleague David Eckstein, CFA sent me:

I’d like to add my voice to the many who are thanking you for sharing your stories. This one reached me in particular. My wife and I have also faced tragic misfortune, including suddenly losing the oldest of our three sons a few weeks before his 27th birthday. Such times test our resilience and also tell us whether we have invested enough in our family and community to receive the support we need to get through times we can’t handle alone. We have been fortunate in that regard and consider ourselves blessed in spite of our losses. Thank you for all you’re doing to make a difference in your family, friends, clients and business acquaintances. It’s working!

The words “we have invested enough in our family and community to receive the support” particularly struck me. The support we receive isn’t automatic. We have to invest in these relationships, so we will be there for each other when needed. Like everything else in building a legacy, we have to be intentional to make it happen. Building a family legacy is arguably the most important investment we make in our lives.

I’ll expand on a story I’ve shared before about recovering from the 2000 tornado that destroyed my law office, and how that resilience was also empowered by the support of family and community. Leaving work on March 28, 2000, the sky was clear and there was no warning of the impending tornado that soon swept through downtown Fort Worth destroying the Bank One Tower and other structures. This was before technology was as advanced, when we were still dependent on paper. I didn’t even own a cell phone yet (what we then called a “car phone”). The Blum Firm was suddenly homeless, without access to any of our files. This is when my support group came to the rescue. Lifelong family friends Morty Herman and the Schuster family were early responders. Morty and the lawyers at Brown Herman law firm squeezed up and made room for us to office with them. When Bank One gave us a one-hour access to return to our destroyed space to grab belongings, Stuart Schuster loaned us a large van from their Marvin’s Electronics store. Allen Schuster provided us boxes from his storage facility business. “Take as many as you need.” My father showed up at my house and handed me $10,000, saying: “This may come in handy.”

But the number one hero in this story is my brother Irwin. As I shared in previous emails, we lost Irwin five years ago to pancreatic cancer, at age 65. One of my favorite Irwin memories is how he sprang into action to help me deal with the tornado devastation. Irwin wasn’t a man of words; he was a man of action. Irwin and I picked up the van and the boxes and drove to Bank One. Irwin drove the van like he was a professional truckdriver, undaunted by its massive size. Entering the parking garage, the rack on top was too tall for the height restriction and bounced off. Unfazed, Irwin hopped out, threw the rack in the back of the van, and kept rolling along to park in the garage. We were on a mission. We had a strict one-hour time limit to grab all we could.

We entered the office space. I was in shock. Everything in the office looked as if it had been picked up and thrown across the office. Desks and furniture were toppled over and broken. Wet paper was everywhere, full of glass chards from the shattered windows that imploded inward into millions of razor-sharp pieces. The building was formerly a glass tower that now had no exterior walls. Live wires were hanging everywhere. Birds were flying through the space. I was paralyzed. Irwin wasn’t. Irwin began assembling boxes, put on work gloves and a safety helmet, and started tossing in everything he could grab, filling box after box. I finally took his lead and joined in. We had to get moving; we only were allowed one hour.

We stacked the boxes floor to ceiling into elevators, then managed to force them all into the van. As we hit the highway, Irwin could only see out the side mirrors (though I’m not sure he ever looked). He’d hit the gas pedal and change lanes; I guess other vehicles just dodged us. Exiting I-30, he pulled into the drive-through at Whataburger for a burger and soda, and he ate it while driving home to store the boxes in my garage. Even for those who didn’t know Irwin, I’m sure you get the picture.

Irwin always looked out for me. He had a “take charge” personality and he enjoyed being the protective big brother, even well into our adult years. This story brings me to a new topic I’ll be developing in coming emails: the value of family INTERDEPENDENCE, as opposed to the customary concept of raising kids to be INDEPENDENT. My colleagues Jim Grubman and Tom Rogerson are also great advocates for this concept. I am grateful Irwin and I were interdependent, so we were there to provide family support for each other when needed. Life throws us curveballs and tornados. We need to be there for each other.

Marvin E. Blum

Fort Worth’s Bank One Tower, including The Blum Firm law office, destroyed by the 2000 tornado.

When Life Throws You a Tornado Read More »

The Greatest Test of Resilience in My Life (and How Zaidy Got Me Through It)

Over the last several weeks of our Family Legacy Planning series, we’ve highlighted the importance of preserving ancestors’ stories of resilience. Heirs draw strength knowing they descend from survivors who had what it took to overcome life’s obstacles. Certainly, I’ve made it through hard times better by knowing I come from survivors who endured persecution. I’ve told the story of my “Zaidy” Eliezer Weinstock and what the Weinstock family endured when escaping Hitler, losing two children who didn’t make it out in time. The Weinstock family picked up the pieces and created a new life in America. In our family, we often gain confidence to handle problems by saying, “We come from good stock, WEIN-stock.”

When I started writing this series over a year ago, I never intended to tell my personal stories. My plan was only to share estate planning tips. However, in using some of my own stories to illustrate these tips, I’ve received on outpouring of encouragement to continue sharing. After the recent emails about my ancestors’ hardships, I was asked to describe a time when I applied those lessons in my own life. At your urging, I will open up about the single hardest moment I have faced in my life. I’ve shared this before, but with your indulgence, I’ll provide more detail, hopefully offering to all the gifts of faith, love, and hope.

After Laurie and I were married a couple of years, we rejoiced at becoming pregnant with our first child. It was a perfect pregnancy all the way up through the ninth month. Laurie went into labor and we headed to the delivery room, stopping along the way to buy a disposable camera (remember those days?). When my mom called on the phone in the delivery room, she greeted me by saying, “Hello, Daddy!” It was then I shared a disconcerting update—the nurse was having trouble finding the baby’s heartbeat. We remained hopeful, as sonogram technology was still fairly new and maybe there was some technical glitch. The doctor arrived and the news became grim. We’d lost the baby. No one ever understood why or what happened. It was a mystery we’d have to live with forever. That was February 11, 1982. We buried our baby girl and returned home to an empty nursery.

We were devastated. I wasn’t ready to disassemble the crib, but Laurie told me we had to do it. We hid away all the shower gifts Laurie had received from her co-workers at Fort Worth National Bank. Laurie returned to work, daily confronting the question in the elevator: “What’d you have?” Laurie found the courage to answer each time, “We lost the baby.” You’ve likely gathered by now that I married a woman of phenomenal strength. Laurie’s a sweet, gentle Southern girl, but lives up to the stereotype of a “steel magnolia.”

We were grateful to be pregnant again within a few months, but as you can imagine, we were filled with trepidation. Laurie wouldn’t even tell anyone she was pregnant. About halfway through the pregnancy, we were at a symphony event and Roz Rosenthal nodded toward Laurie’s tummy with a question mark on her face. That night, I told Laurie it was time to let the word out.

On the morning of February 10, 1983, about a month before the due date, I went to work like a normal day. Laurie soon called that she thought she felt a contraction. There had been no signs of early labor. Was this a false alarm? We weren’t taking chances. We met her doctor at the delivery room who confirmed that this was the real thing. Soon after midnight, February 11, 1983, Laurie gave birth to a healthy baby boy. I’ve always believed that Laurie and the Divine willed it to be, that February 11 should be a miracle day for us. Exactly one year to the day after losing our first baby, we were blessed with Adam.

I’ll share another fact I’ve not revealed before. We saved the Hebrew name we were going to use for our first baby girl, with the hope we’d someday have a daughter. That name was Pesha Ita, the Hebrew name of my grandmother Pauline, the daughter of “Zaidy” Eliezer Weinstock. Within three years, our prayers were answered with the birth of Elizabeth Pauline (“Pesha Ita” in Hebrew). Our daughter is yet another miracle, as she carries the name of such a valiant ancestor, while she also carries in her the soul of a sister in heaven.

Fast forward to our daughter’s first pregnancy. Several weeks before Lizzy’s due date, we received an urgent call that her baby was under stress. Laurie and I rushed to the airport, got the last two seats on the next flight to New York, feeling an all too familiar déjà vu from our own first pregnancy. That was a scary trip—a nonstop flight with nonstop prayer. We rushed to Mount Sinai Hospital, and within the hour arrived a small but healthy baby girl Stella, the first member of the fifth generation in the Meyer Oberstein–Pauline Weinstock family tree. “Zaidy” Eliezer Weinstock was there for us once again. Never lose faith, and never underestimate the power of our ancestors to pull us through. They are angels on our shoulders as we go through life. May we preserve their memories and their stories forever.

Marvin E. Blum

Pictured left: The joy of motherhood, as Laurie Blum caresses her newborn son Adam born February 11, 1983, exactly one year after a stillborn birth. Pictured right: Marvin Blum experiences the joy of fatherhood with his infant son Adam.

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Bringing Lessons of the Holocaust into 2022

The last several emails in our Family Legacy Planning series have revealed the atrocities suffered by my family in the Holocaust. My Zaidy’s eye was poked out in a Russian czarist pogrom in his village in Ukraine. My grandfather Meyer at age 9 escaped a firing squad in Poland when he was caught seeking work after curfew. My son-in-law Ira’s grandmother Miriam survived Auschwitz, coming out at 72 pounds. Her only surviving relative was her brother Adolf (“Unkie”), also imprisoned in forced labor and concentration camps. Profoundly, Unkie declared “We beat Hitler!” on his deathbed as he observed the birth of Jewish descendants, including my granddaughter Stella who started a new generation in our family. These Holocaust stories have stirred a powerful reaction, especially given the parallels with the atrocities now happening in Ukraine.

It’s a well-known proverb that “unless we learn from history, we are doomed to repeat it.” Considering the present-day Russian aggression, I fear we aren’t adequately learning from history. It’s critical that we preserve and pass down stories of ancestor survival to our heirs. The need is especially urgent as the generation of Holocaust eyewitnesses is rapidly perishing. That brings me to my message today. How can we best bring our ancestors’ stories into 2022?

My daughter Lizzy Savetsky has a solution. Lizzy has a vast Instagram following and is using these stories to sound an alarm. We must never forget! Remember the people we come from and draw courage from them. Lizzy’s megaphone literally and figuratively awakens us that we cannot stand by silently while our brothers and sisters are persecuted and murdered. Laurie and I stand in awe of Lizzy’s heart and bravery.

Lizzy’s premise is that the ultimate way to preserve memories is to see where it happened with our own eyes. To that end, Lizzy joined a Heritage Trip to Poland sponsored by Jewish International Connection New York. Lizzy went to Auschwitz. She sat on the railroad tracks where cattle cars brutally transported millions of Jews to their death. She saw the barbed wire fences with the sign proclaiming the Nazi lie “Arbeit Macht Frei.” Indeed, work did not make them free. Lizzy stood in the place where her husband’s grandmother was forced to gather the possessions of gas chamber victims, finding her own mother’s monogrammed handkerchief and thereby discovering that her mother had been gassed to death. She saw a room filled with hundreds of thousands of shoes of victims and realized every shoe was once on a person’s foot. The six million victims were not statistics. They were the people who wore these very shoes.

When Lizzy returned, she wrote her reflections from being there in person, in the place where it happened. Click here to read her heartrending summary of the trip. Imagine the powerful disconnect to stand in a beautiful forest in Poland and try to reconcile how, in that very place of nature’s paradise, Nazis could line up thousands of Jews and shoot them into a ditch, many buried alive. Lizzy closes with a quote from the rabbi on their trip: “The Nazis tried to bury us, but they didn’t realize we are seeds.” Those tortured souls who were buried in that ditch are now sprouting new life, lives like my five grandkids Stella, Juliet, Lucy, Ollie, and Grey.

How does this message of family heritage and travel tie into The Blum Firm’s work in Family Legacy Planning? Here’s how. Every family has roots. It’s important for future heirs to go in person “to the place where it happened.” As Lizzy pointed out to me last week, it’s even more meaningful if a trip like this is taken as a family. Family travel, whether a roots trip or other travel, helps keep a family unified. I’ve previously quoted author Mitzi Purdue as she credits annual family travel as the foremost reason her family (heirs to Sheraton Hotels and Purdue Chicken) stays connected. In creating your estate plan, I strongly urge you to set aside funds in a separate trust to be used to pay for family travel and other family enrichment, like family meetings, training, and experiences. If you fail to fund it, my observation is that it stops happening after the patriarch and matriarch are gone. The fund can be a FAST Trust (Family Advancement Sustainability Trust) or any other trust vehicle. Consider dedicating a life insurance policy to fund the trust, a convenient way to provide the money without disrupting the rest of the inheritance.

The Blum Firm would be honored to help you build such a family enrichment fund into your estate plan. We want to partner with you to keep your ancestors’ stories alive and help future generations of your family stay connected.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s daughter Lizzy Savetsky on the railroad tracks at Auschwitz, feeling a connection to the millions of murdered Jews transported there in cattle cars, on those very tracks.

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What Stella’s Birth Means (“We Beat Hitler” – Part 2)

Last week’s Family Legacy Planning post continued exploring the importance of preserving and passing down a family heritage. The focus was on the significance of the birth of my oldest grandchild, Stella. On both sides of her family, Stella descends from ancestors who miraculously escaped death in the Holocaust. Stella’s birth symbolizes victory over Hitler’s evil attempt to kill all the world’s Jews. Hitler killed one-third of the world’s Jews, but he didn’t win. Stella is living proof.

The last two weeks’ emails told stories of survival of two of Stella’s ancestors on her mother’s side, my “Zaidy” Eliezer Weinstock from Ukraine (who lost an eye in a Russian pogrom) and my grandfather Meyer Oberstein from Poland (who escaped a Russian firing squad as a young boy). Today, we turn to survival stories of ancestors on Stella’s father’s side, my son-in-law Dr. Ira Savetsky.

Ira’s grandmother Miriam Feuerstein was viciously uprooted from her girlhood home in Czechoslovakia and transported, along with her parents, to Auschwitz, the most infamous of Nazi concentration camps. One of her brothers, Yitzchak, was shot into a ditch when the Nazis wiped out the town. Another brother Adolf was taken to a Hungarian forced labor camp, and later to Mauthausen concentration camp. Miriam’s job at Auschwitz was to sort the clothing of those who had been burned alive in gas chambers. She discovered the tragic fate of her parents when she found her mother’s monogrammed handkerchief among the pile.

Miraculously, Miriam survived, coming out of Auschwitz at 72 lbs. She was able to find her brother Adolf, who had also miraculously survived. All their remaining family had been murdered. Miriam and Adolf immigrated to America and started a life in New York. For yet another miracle, Miriam recovered and later gave birth to a daughter Aliza (Ira’s mother) and a son Elliot. Aliza had 4 children. To help keep the memories alive, Aliza named one of her daughters Miriam, after her mother, and she gave her son Ira the Hebrew name of Yitzchak (the Hebrew name for Issac), after her uncle.

As I retell this story of survival, I realize the power of personalizing the horrors of the Holocaust and war. It’s hard to absorb statistics, like the killing of six million Jews, but this story reminds us that those were six million individual lives. As my dear friend Todd Healy responded to my email about Zaidy, “Thanks for personalizing it for so many of us who don’t have the connections to the tragedies that you do!” These are people, someone’s parents, sisters, brothers, children. They are not just numbers.

Ira’s family affectionately called their Uncle Adolf, “Unkie.” Unkie was like a grandfather to Ira. Thankfully, Unkie lived a long and productive life in America. On his deathbed, he reflected on the families he and his sister Miriam created, who were surrounding his bedside. Looking at them with awareness that each descendant of Holocaust survivors represents the continuation of the Jewish people, these were Unkie’s dying words: “We beat Hitler!”

As the attached photo of Unkie holding his great-great-niece Stella proves, indeed we did beat Hitler! Stella’s life has a purpose. Look into Stella’s eyes—there is hope for the world. Each of our lives has a purpose. As we discover our “why”—why we’re here, may that motivate us to each live a more purposeful and meaningful life.

Marvin E. Blum

Holocaust survivor Adolf Feuerstein (“Unkie”) holding his great-great-niece Stella Savetsky (Marvin Blum’s granddaughter). Stella is living proof of Unkie’s dying words: “We Beat Hitler!”

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What Stella Means to Our Family Heritage (“We Beat Hitler” – Part 1)

I am overwhelmed by the outpouring of support I received from last week’s Family Legacy Planning email “I Am Ukrainian.” I told the story of my “Zaidy” Eliezer Weinstock who lost an eye in a Russian pogrom against Jews living in Polona, Ukraine. Miraculously, Zaidy escaped to America with his four youngest children, including my grandmother Pauline. Zaidy’s two oldest children, my Great Aunt Elke and my Great Uncle Enoch, remained in Ukraine and were murdered in the Holocaust.

It’s particularly gratifying to hear comments from those of you who were inspired by my story to share your own family heritage with your heirs. As an example, Bob Semple replied: “Your comments on knowing your family heritage are spot on. I am making sure my family knows our heritage.”

I cannot overstate the importance of preserving family history to pass down to future generations. Luther King’s response to me reinforces this message: “I could not agree with you more regarding the importance of preserving family heritage and building pride and respect around it. Families we have worked for that have stressed their heritage, as a general rule, hang together and have high self-esteem.” Passing down that history, especially stories of resilience, proves enormously strengthening to kids when facing obstacles of their own.

Many encouraged me to continue sharing my personal stories, so at your urging, I’ll do a bit more of that. My hope is to continue inspiring people to do the same. Every family has its own stories. I urge you talk to your relatives and uncover those stories, then write them down to preserve them for future heirs.

Soon after my Zaidy Eliezer arrived in the US, he spotted a young man at synagogue services, and invited him home to join the Weinstock family for Shabbat dinner. That man was Meyer Oberstein, a recent immigrant from the town of Tiktin in Czarist Russia (later Poland). It was love at first sight between Meyer Oberstein and Pauline Weinstock, and they soon married.

My grandfather Meyer Oberstein’s story is also miraculous. Meyer was nine years old when World War I broke out, and the Jewish towns and villages around Tiktin suffered great danger, dislocation, and starvation. As a young boy, Meyer was out one night after curfew trying to find work to earn money to help feed his family. He was caught by Russian soldiers who lined up a firing squad to shoot him. Then a miracle occurred. An old Russian commissar with a beard rode up on a donkey and asked why they were going to shoot the boy. The Russian soldiers responded that little Meyer was possibly a German spy. The old man told them to let Meyer go, that he was only a kid and not a spy. That is how close my grandfather came to death.

Hitler’s goal was to kill all Jews, and indeed he did kill one-third of the world’s Jews in the Holocaust. The best victory we can now have over Hitler is for more Jews to be born, perpetuating the Jewish people. We cannot bring back the lives lost, but with every new generation of Jews, we are resolving that Hitler did not win.

Fate brought Meyer from Poland and Pauline from Ukraine to Montgomery, Alabama, where they married and had four children, including my mother Elsie. Meyer and Pauline were Generation 1 for our family in America. My mother Elsie and her three siblings are Generation 2. My brother Irwin and I, along with our 16 first cousins, are Generation 3. My children Adam and Elizabeth, along with their cousins (numbering nearly 100), are Generation 4.

So where does my oldest grandchild Stella fit into this story? In the family tree that starts with Meyer and Pauline, the first member of Generation 5 is Stella Savetsky, born nine years ago to our daughter Elizabeth and her husband Ira. Generation 5 will eventually number in the hundreds, and Stella will always have the distinction of being the first member of that generation. Stella’s life has a purpose. Stella represents the continuation of the Jewish people and our resilience. We say in Hebrew, L’dor Vador, from Generation to Generation. Going all the way back to Moses and the children of Israel, Stella’s life is proof that the unbroken chain continues!

Marvin E. Blum

Starting a fifth post-Holocaust generation in the Blum family when Stella (in her father’s arms) and later Juliet (in her mother’s arms) became links in an unbroken chain to perpetuate the Jewish people. Pictured left to right: Adam Blum, Laurie Blum, Stella Savetsky, Ira Savetsky, Elizabeth Savetsky holding Juliet Savetsky, Marvin Blum, and proud great-grandmother Elsie Blum.

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I Am Ukrainian

As part of our Family Legacy Planning series, we have stressed the importance of preserving family heritage. Statistics show that children who know more about their ancestors grow up with a higher self-esteem. Moreover, knowing stories of ancestors who overcame obstacles gives heirs confidence they too can be resilient when hard times strike.

In my own family’s mission to learn more about our past, I have discovered some powerful revelations. All four of my grandparents immigrated to the United States from Eastern Europe to escape the Holocaust. Many of my ancestors descend from Ukraine, from a town they called Polnoa, now known as Polonne or Polona. Given today’s war in Ukraine, I feel a strong solidarity with the Ukrainian people.

My family’s life in Ukraine was difficult. Jews were persecuted by the Czar. Our “Zaidy” (the Yiddish word for grandfather) even had one eye poked out in a vicious pogrom against the Jews. My great-grandfather Eliezer Weinstock (“Zaidy”) was among the lucky few who made it to America. He left behind all of his possessions except “the knowledge between his ears,” prompting him to say: “What you put into your mind, no one can take away from you.” Hence, our family put an emphasis on education and giving your all in a commitment to lifelong learning.

I always thought all of Zaidy’s family made it to America. I was shocked recently when our longtime paralegal Becky Samons made a hospital visit to my mother and asked her if she lost any family in the Holocaust. I expected her to answer “no” but, for the first time I learned, the answer was “yes.” Zaidy’s two oldest children, Elke and Enoch, were both married and unable to afford passage to the U.S. They remained behind and became victims of Hitler’s mission to exterminate all Jews. My mother recounts that she and her grandmother shared a bed, and their nightly prayers were that Elke and Enoch were still alive. But, they were never heard from again.

My one-eyed Zaidy never learned English, forever clinging to Yiddish, his mother tongue. In his late years, he went before an Alabama judge to apply for U.S. citizenship. Though unable to pass any test in English, the judge waived the formal requirements and proudly declared him a United States citizen, saying anyone who’d endured his plight was worthy of U.S. citizenship.

I am proud to descend from Ukrainian Jews who instilled in me values of family, education, and leading a productive and spiritual life. I am now the proud grandfather of five grandchildren. When time came for me to choose the name my grandchildren would call me, I was honored to select “Zaidy” as my name, a tribute to my Zaidy Eliezer Weinstock. Without question, being “Zaidy” will always be the most important part of my identity.

Marvin E. Blum

Marvin Blum’s “Zaidy” Eliezer Weinstock, a Ukrainian who lost an eye in a czarist pogrom against Jews.

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Hot Topics for 2022 from The Blum Firm

Each year, The Blum Firm prepares an annual newsletter covering current topics in the estate planning, probate, and tax world. Our “Hot Topics for 2022” newsletter is now hitting mailboxes, and we’d like to share with you the headlines for the top ten we selected:

  • Is a Grantor Trust Right for You?
  • Win-Win-Lose: Trusts That Benefit Charity While Sticking it to the IRS
  • Wouldn’t You Like a $100 Million IRA Like Mitt Romney?
  • Do You Own Anything in Your Name Other Than Retirement Accounts?
  • I Want My Fair Share– Litigation in Time of Financial Uncertainty
  • Check Your Probate Knowledge
  • Family Legacy Planning
  • Could Forgotten Checklist Items Derail Your Estate Plan?
  • Estate & Gift Tax Numbers to Know in 2022
  • Guardianship Prevention Planning

About five years ago, we expanded our services at The Blum Firm beyond estate and tax planning. We have an outstanding team at the firm with substantial expertise in trust and estate litigation, as well as guardianship. As the above topics show, there are some hot developments in those areas. One ramification of the current tumultuous economy is that some family members are tapping every source for financial security during times of financial uncertainty. Those receiving less than they feel they should receive are increasingly turning to litigation, often over smaller amounts than would typically be litigated. It’s important to review your estate plan for potential disgruntled parties and consider taking extra steps to mitigate the risk of later litigation. At the same time, review the individuals you have named as executors, trustees, and powers of attorney to ensure that they are people you absolutely trust to act in accordance with your wishes.

In the guardianship area, we are working actively on “guardianship prevention” planning. This has become an especially hot topic with so many baby boomers reaching the age of potential cognitive decline.

Other highlights in our newsletter warn you to watch for assets that pass outside of a will to make sure they don’t derail your estate plan. We also alert you on how to avoid probate to maintain privacy for your estate and your heirs, especially critical in this age of open information. And there’s so much more.

If you’re not on our mailing list, please contact us with your mailing address so we can add you to our list. A digital version of our newsletter is available here.

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Business Succession Planning: Not Every Family Has an Elsie

I have a confession to make. In last week’s Family Legacy Planning email, I identified “business succession planning” as the most neglected area of estate planning. I grew up in a family business. Here’s my confession: our family also neglected business succession planning. There, I said it. Sometime the cobbler’s own shoes need attention.

As it turns out, in failing to plan for the transition of our family business, we are in the company of millions of others. Consider these statistics: 90% of American businesses are family-owned or controlled, yet less than one-third of those businesses have a succession plan. The family is left unprepared when an unexpected event occurs, such as the death of the owner. That’s what happened when my brother Irwin died. Irwin ran our family business, and when he died only two weeks after his cancer diagnosis, we were caught off guard. Fortunately, we had a savior—my 86-year-old mother Elsie emerged from retirement and, over the course of a year, single-handedly shepherded the business through to a successful conclusion. We were fortunate she had the skills and strength to rescue us. There was no one else besides her who knew the business and could have done what she did. Had it not been for my mother, we’d have been in desperate shape.

But not every family has an Elsie. I urge all business owners to learn from our story and have a succession plan in place. That way, if you’re caught off guard and don’t have an Elsie, your family will know what to do.

Here’s the story of our family business. When I was an infant, my father Julius started our family business. It wasn’t glamorous. It was an industrial café in Fort Worth’s meat packing district. We opened before 5:00 a.m. and served meals to the packing house employees. It wasn’t air conditioned, and our customers came straight from the area killing floors, boning rooms, and rendering plants—covered in blood-stained work clothes. The sight was one thing; the smell was even harder to imagine. I grew up working alongside my parents and brother from the time I was a mere toddler—clearing tables, washing dishes, cooking, and (as soon as I could add) working the cash register. That business gave me an education unlike anything my friends and I learned at school. It was hard work, but it provided us an honest living. My father used to say: “If you take care of your business, it will take care of you.” Indeed, that was true.

As I said in last week’s email, like so many business owners, my parents lived and breathed their business as if was like another child in the family. That day’s business was the topic of conversation at dinner every night. I understand and respect how people become so attached to their businesses, all the more reason to plan for the continuity of that business when the day comes the founders are no longer there to run it.

Over the years, Blum’s Café gradually morphed into J. Blum Co. Meat Packing Supplies. We started selling the workers knives, gloves, rubber boots, hard hats, frock coats, and all the other things meat packers use in their trade. Then we expanded into selling those supplies to meat packing businesses. I continued working in the business throughout my school years. Motivated by that school of hard knocks, I went full force into my studies and opted to become a CPA/tax lawyer. But my brother Irwin stayed on in the family business. When my father died and my mother retired, Irwin ran the business. Irwin was a dynamo—working like a machine, running every aspect of the business and keeping most it in his head. When he died, the only one who knew what was in Irwin’s head was my mother. In her mid-80’s, Elsie jumped right in with full force and took over. She’s a miracle woman.

Here’s the moral: Don’t depend on an Elsie to appear out of the blue and rescue your family business if the owner is suddenly gone. In the coming weeks, I’ll cover the steps to take in creating a business succession plan. And in the spirit of my confession, I’ll close with the adage: Do as I say, and not as I did.

Marvin E. Blum

The Blum family matriarch, Elsie Blum, surrounded by loving family. A business dynamo in her 80’s, Elsie single-handedly managed the family business transition.

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The Most Neglected Area of Estate Planning

In a radio interview, I was once asked “What’s the most neglected area of estate planning?” Without hesitation, I replied: “business succession planning.”

Last week’s email on prenup planning referred to Jon Moore’s article in Family Business magazine entitled “In a Divorce, Who Gets What?” In it, Moore emphasized the importance of advance planning, so family businesses survive divorce and/or death. He stresses the concept of “integrated planning,” coordinating all the puzzle pieces: estate planning, disaster planning, asset protection planning, and business continuity planning. It takes more than hope and luck for a business to transition through major family changes and disruptions, especially the death of a founder. It takes careful planning.

Most business owners have a strong emotional connection with the business they created, almost as if it’s another child. They care what happens to the business after they’re gone. They have a keen interest in building a sustainable business that passes down as a meaningful legacy to future generations. Given the aging demographic of many baby boomer business founders, there is an urgent need to plan for what happens WHEN, not IF, the founder is no longer running the business. Family business owners are often so emotionally tied to the business that they have a hard time imagining the business without them. They believe they are indispensable. But as Charles de Gaulle, former president of France, famously said: “Cemeteries are full of indispensable people.”

When it comes to business succession planning (also known as business continuity planning or business transition planning), there are no easy solutions or fill-in-the-blank forms. The hardest part is to get started. Here’s a suggestion for the first step: call a meeting of those most familiar with you and your business and designate them as your planning team. Choose from among your CPA, attorney, banker, financial advisor, life insurance professional, family counselor, and other key stakeholders. Bring your planning team to the table to start the conversation. They will gradually help you develop a succession plan that makes sense for your business and your family. Then, they will guide you through the steps to implement the plan. Don’t try to go it alone.

When the time comes to develop the plan, it really boils down to three choices in the toolbox:

  • Transfer the business to family members
  • Sell the business to inside parties (people within the business)
  • Sell the business to an outside party

In coming emails, we’ll explore more about the business succession planning process, and dive into each of these options. The Blum Firm would be honored to partner with you to help you achieve a successful continuation of the business legacy you worked so hard to build.

Marvin E. Blum

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Addressing the “What If’s” Before Saying the “I Do’s”

We continue this week with our Family Legacy Planning segment on “the year of the wedding.” As mentioned last week, much of the goal of protecting family assets can be achieved outside of a prenup agreement through a “prenup alternative.” A prenup alternative utilizes irrevocable trusts and/or entities to protect assets. By carefully using these common estate planning tools, you can convert what would’ve been “marital property” into “non-marital property,” an important distinction.

All assets benefitting a Texas married person fall into one of two categories: marital property and non-marital property. Within the category of marital property, there are two sub-categories: community property and separate property. Separate property consists of assets owned before marriage or acquired during marriage by inheritance or gift. All of a spouse’s other assets, including income received from separate property, are community property. There is a presumption that all assets are community property, barring clear and convincing evidence that an asset is separate property. When separate and community are commingled, the commingling generally results in the assets becoming community. When a family court divides community property, it doesn’t necessarily divide it 50/50. The court can make a “just and right” division and award more than one-half to a spouse, taking into consideration equitable factors. One of the factors that a court can weigh is whether one of the spouses has more separate property than the other. So even though separate property cannot be awarded to the other spouse, it is still on the table for consideration and can impact the way a court divides the community property. On the other hand, non-marital property is not on the table for consideration in a divorce settlement.

Assets owned by a carefully drafted irrevocable trust are non-marital property. Ideally, parents will direct that all gifts and assets passing at death go to such a trust for their child. Single adults who have already accumulated assets in their own name can transfer assets to certain “self-settled” non-Texas trusts or can sell assets to a 678 Trust. When assets are transferred to a self-settled non-Texas trust or sold before marriage to a 678 Trust, the assets in the trust will continue to be non-marital property, even as they grow. If the assets were sold for a promissory note, the note will be separate property. However, the note will be frozen in size and is the type of asset not susceptible to being commingled. Irrevocable trusts are far less likely than prenups to be subjected to legal challenge. Legal precedent tends to favor respecting the integrity of the trust. Furthermore, unlike a prenup where both future spouses are involved and have to sign the document, a trust is easier on the relationship since the future spouse plays no role with the trust and needn’t sign anything with respect to the trust.

Another prenup alternative is to transfer assets before marriage into an entity, such as a limited liability company or limited partnership. In Texas, although a spouse’s outside ownership interest in a partnership is marital property, assets owned inside a partnership, as well as income earned but undistributed, aren’t divisible upon divorce. Contrast this with income earned on separate property that was not placed inside an entity or trust. Income on a Texas spouse’s separate property is community, whereas income accumulated in the entity or trust is non-marital property. It’s easy to see the substantial benefits prenup alternatives can provide.

Can you achieve all the protection you need through prenup alternatives and avoid the need for a prenup? There are certain protections that still require a prenup, but perhaps it could be a scaled-back prenup. Those entering into second marriages may need to address obligations to former spouses. A child from a prior relationship requires special planning to diminish the risk of later friction between the child and a stepparent. If a spouse is in a high-liability-risk profession, a prenup can provide an added layer of protection for the other spouse’s property. The prenup can also specify how assets are divided when a marriage ends, whether by divorce or by a spouse’s death. In addition, if assets were transferred before marriage to an entity, once the entity makes distributions, the distributions are generally treated as community property. A prenup can override that treatment and characterize those distributions as separate property. Therefore, many do both a prenup and a prenup alternative (sort of a belt and suspenders approach). However, if the primary goal is to only protect certain family legacy assets, sufficient protection can often be achieved by only doing prenup alternatives.

In the Family Business magazine article “In a Divorce, Who Gets What?,” Jon Moore discusses the Amazon divorce of Jeff Bezos and MacKenzie Scott. Scott received a 4% stake in Amazon, valued at $38 billion, but agreed Bezos could retain voting control over her shares. Moore describes a three-step process to protect the shares of stock in a family corporation: (1) put title to the shares in a spouse’s name as separate property (a “belt”); (2) declare in a prenup that the family business is separate property, including any future income or growth in value of the business (“suspenders”); and (3) hold the business in a corporation with a Shareholders’ Agreement specifying that a divorced spouse cannot be a shareholder of the corporation (a “second belt”). Many family corporations have a buy-sell agreement providing that if a divorcing spouse acquires a right to stock, that spouse must sell the stock back to the family at a pre-agreed price. Moore adds that another tool is to transfer the stock to an irrevocable trust, as a prenup alternative, as we suggested above.

As is evident, there are multiple techniques and considerations in deciding how to best protect family assets. It’s not a “one size fits all.” However, with the grim statistic that about half of first marriages in the United States end in divorce, pre-marital planning to protect family assets is the responsible thing to do. The Blum Firm would be honored to help you weigh all the options and decide what is best for your family.

Marvin E. Blum

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