When I started writing this weekly blog over four years ago, I never imagined I’d still be at it, some 230 episodes later. I also never imagined the direction it would take. It began with practical tips on estate, tax, and family legacy planning. When I leaked in a bit of personal Blum family lore, the feedback shocked me. People wanted to hear more about me—the personal stuff, the stories, the lessons learned. I never expected this blog to become such an open book about Marvin Blum.
As a result, most of my blog posts have turned very vulnerable and authentic. The stories and life experiences seem to keep surfacing. Who knew all that was locked up inside? I certainly didn’t.
Even as I reveal more and more “musings from Marvin,” I do aim to tie them into estate planning and legacy-building words of wisdom. Remarkably that hasn’t been hard. Estate planning is both a “head” and “heart” endeavor. Most of my posts speak to the “heart” side of the estate planning process, helping families create a meaningful and lasting legacy.
It seems a daily occurrence when someone asks me, “When are you going to write a book?” I generally hesitate, and I ask: “What would be the topic? What would people want to read?” My blog is such a potpourri of subjects.
I had this very conversation with a lady at a recent TIGER 21 retreat. She told me she awaits my blog every Tuesday morning, eager for my weekly message. She then urged me to write a book. When I asked, “About what?,” her response was “parenting.” She looks to my blog for guidance on how to raise responsible kids, kids who have a solid core. The fact I have no training or special expertise in parenting didn’t matter to her. She sees the sum total of my work as guidance on how to create a family with lasting values.
Coincidentally, the next night at dinner, another TIGER 21 couple asked my advice on how to balance building a career and raising young kids, both of which (if done well) are time consuming. I acknowledged the juggle, and then offered some examples from my early years of growing both a law practice and a family:
- Adam and I were both very early risers, so we had a lot of one-on-one interaction before my workday began. Early on, we built cities with blocks, made intricate Lego creations, and talked about his world. The activities and conversations evolved as Adam grew older.
- Every night at bedtime was my time for one-on-one reading with Adam and Lizzy. We grew quite a collection of books, which I’m now enjoying all over again with our six grandchildren.
- For many years, I blocked off every Thursday afternoon on my calendar as if it were a client appointment and alternated one-on-one afternoon outings with Adam and Lizzy. We called it “Special Time.” I remember how it started. A movie made me tearfully melancholy on how fast kids grow up, and I worried I’d look back with regret that I missed out on those years with our kids. Laurie came up with the idea of “Special Time.” The outings varied: stockyards, synagogues, parks, even cemeteries. I recall driving high up on highway overpasses so Adam could see how little the distant cars and trucks became. Lizzy and I sat under a tree in the Botanic Gardens and learned all the lyrics to Judy Collins’ “Both Sides Now” (which we remember to this day). Those outings slowed down the racing timeclock with my kids growing up so fast, plus they helped me build a lifelong connection with them. The memories of those “Special Times” now fill my soul.
After offering my thoughts, my TIGER 21 colleague Ryan Pearson said, “You ought to write a blog on this subject.” What a great idea! Building family connection is a key part of building a family legacy. Now I wonder, could something like this turn into a book?